


The Fall

by Ginger_Pop, jlcamp09



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Multi, Romance, Threesome - F/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2016-01-29
Packaged: 2018-05-12 11:14:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 34
Words: 136,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5664112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ginger_Pop/pseuds/Ginger_Pop, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jlcamp09/pseuds/jlcamp09
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ever have a hard time deciding whether to romance Solas or Cullen? So does the Inquisitor...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Inquisitor Trevelyan leaned over the war table, her eyes scanning the map as she mentally went over everything she and her advisors had discussed that morning. It never seemed to end. They’d only recently returned from the Winter Palace, a night that had been more of a headache than anything else on so many levels. It still seemed strange to her how after the murder of the Empress and the fight with Florianne that the court then proceeded with the party as if it were a perfectly normal affair. And she’d gone right along with it, though now in retrospect, it all seemed rather distasteful to her. 

Still, she had to admit that the dancing had been nice. She’d taken a quiet moment to herself after the fight to catch her breath and clear her head on the balcony. Cullen had come to check on her and offered to dance. He’d turned down offers to dance all night long, but for her he’d made an exception. There had been a warmth in his eyes, though a blush spread across his cheeks when he misstepped and he apologized profusely while she laughed it off. He’d chuckled and tried again, holding her a little closer and dancing a little slower. It still made little butterflies flutter in her stomach every time she thought about it, the private dance shared on that balcony away from prying eyes.

She had to bite her lips now to keep herself from smiling. Leliana would surely pick up on that and know that Evelyn’s mind was somewhere else right now. She furrowed her eyebrows intentionally, trying to appear as if she were contemplating the map. But her mind flitted back to the Winter Palace.

As soon as she and Cullen had returned to the ballroom, Solas had invited her to dance, and how could she say no to that? As gracefully as she could, she excused herself from Cullen, and he had been a gentleman about it of course, though she hadn’t missed the ever so subtle flash of jealousy in his eyes. It made her feel guilty and confused, but not guilty enough to turn down the offer from Solas to dance.

While Cullen’s uncertainty about dancing was endearing, Solas’ confidence was sexy. He’d held her securely while leading her around the dance floor, his hand at the small of her back, and that intense look in his eyes that made her knees go weak. Thank the Maker he’d held her so close; she had been certain that she would’ve fallen if he hadn’t. And when his long fingers had brushed a piece of her hair behind her ear, her eyes fluttered and she thought her heart was going to leap out of her chest. 

It was strange to her to see him so dressed up, though the overall effect was improved once they’d stashed that silly hat in one of the planters in the garden prior to dancing. They’d snickered about it together and it was refreshing to her to see him less serious than usual.

She’d lost herself in their dance, and for a moment nothing else existed but him. But all too soon the song ended and she suffered an awkward moment when she caught sight of Cullen over Solas’ shoulder. She didn’t know whether she should continue dancing with Solas, ask Cullen if he would like to dance again, or is she should just go hide somewhere until everyone was ready to head back to Skyhold. Luckily Dorian had swooped in and swept her away from both of them, and had occupied the rest of her night by flashily waltzing her around the dancefloor. And she was grateful for it; she’d never felt so torn and confused in all her life.

Now she felt eyes on her and she glanced up to see Cullen watching her. She tucked a piece of her white-blonde hair behind her ear and gave him a small smile. When he smiled in return, she felt her heart skip and a heat spread across her nose and cheekbones. She ducked her head to look at the map again.

Evelyn could hear her pulse in her ears and she was so distracted, she could barely pay attention as Josephine attempted to plan another weekly “interlude.” She had to stop herself from snickering. Both Cullen and Leliana saw the interludes as an unnecessary distraction from their work; she’d once walked in on Cullen snapping at a messenger that it was a “bloody tea party” and that he didn’t have time for such a thing. And she could sense irritation from both of them now as Josephine continued to press the issue.

“We’ll be there, Josephine,” Evelyn promised, looking up again. She gave Leliana and Cullen pointed looks before she added, “All of us.” 

“Good!” Josephine chirped, looking positively pleased as she began to gather up her papers. 

Evelyn pushed away from the table, lingering for a moment while her advisors prepared to leave the war room, then casually fell into step beside Cullen, both of them walking a little slow to fall behind Leliana and Josephine. She couldn’t read his mood at the moment. He almost looked happy to be walking beside her, yet his irritation with the other advisors was more than obvious. Besides the plans for another interlude, they’d teased him about all the interest he’d garnered at the Winter Palace, threatened to use him as bait, and Leliana had told him to “just look pretty.”

She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. “Not in the mood for a tea party?” she teased, trying to test his mood and offer him the opportunity to vent if he needed it.

Cullen dragged a hand down over his face, scrubbing at his cheek. “Forgive me being blunt, but no. Not particularly. Don't get me wrong, I know why she's doing it. To have some reminded of what we are fighting for, to have some normalcy amidst all of this chaos. It just drains me, knowing that the enemy is still out there.” He flickered his gaze back to her, drinking in the soft understanding look she gave him. “Call me old fashioned, but I don't need a fancy tea party to remind me of what is worth fighting for. I'd be just as happy napping in the sunlight or playing a game of chess.”

She felt a blush creep across her nose again and she looked down at the stone floor as they walked. “You? Nap?” she asked, looking up at him again. “This coming from a man who has to be reminded to eat and sleep because he works so hard. Commander, I don’t believe you for a moment.” She couldn’t help but to laugh lightly when a slight frown crossed his lips. “Come on now, you know it’s true. But if you’re looking for someone to play chess with, I’d be glad you join you.” She reached up to smooth down a piece of his mantle that was a bit unruly, her fingers brushing the back of his neck. “There,” she said, letting her fingers linger against his skin just a second or two before she withdrew her hand.

It was hard to get a handle on his heart as her fingers ghosted over his skin and he was unable to stop the small smile that tugged at his lips. “Yes, well...” He looked down at her, his voice quieting. She was a remarkable woman and she just was so kind, so well spoken and thoughtful. Something he wouldn't have expected from many, let alone a mage. Let alone a mage who had the weight of the entire world on her shoulders. “A man can wish for the small luxuries. Chess would be a welcome distraction, and far more easy for me to attain than sleep.”

“Then it’s a date,” she teased, letting her feet carry her through the Great Hall, towards the Rotunda that would lead them out to Cullen’s office. She felt her heart fluttering, walking so close to Cullen that it would’ve been easy to slip her hand into his, and yet she couldn’t seem to muster up the courage to do it. “I can bring snacks for us, get someone from the kitchens to make something.” She paused and giggled. “I could probably persuade Sera to swipe some wine from Vivienne’s stores too, if you like.”

Cullen chuckled, “The offer is tempting, but I'd rather not get on Madame Vivienne’s list. There have been rumors…” He trailed off and gave her a wink before he moved to open the door to the Rotunda for her. “Though, you and Cassandra think you are being clever trying to get me to eat more. You say snacks, but by the time we are ready to play chess it will be a four course meal. With tea.”

Evelyn laughed openly at that, her head tilting back and the sound filling the air. “We’re that obvious, are we?” she giggled. She couldn’t stop herself from smiling in amusement. “Well you can’t blame us for trying. You know we do it because we care.” She flashed him a big smile and batted her eyes playfully. “Now quit complaining. It wouldn’t hurt you to eat a little more, you know. And if I have to bribe you with games of chess to do it, then so be it.”

He paused in the doorway, giving her a slight smile as he felt his heart warm at her words. Even though he was a broken shell of a man, she still wanted to look after him. What was left of him. “I hardly need to be bribed when the company is…”

“Ah, Inquisitor, my apologies, but might I speak with you?” Solas called from his desk in the middle of the Rotunda. He glanced over to see the Commander pull back from Evelyn's personal space. “It is regarding the elven artifacts that we have been activating in the Hinterlands.”

Cullen closed his eyes, sighing heavily in his mind. So much for a moment of peace. He gave Evie a smile and bowed slightly to her. “You will have to speak with me when you are finished. We will set up a time for that game of chess.” He could feel a headache coming on as he pulled back from her and exchanged a look with the elf. He had a great respect for the elf, but his timing was terrible. “Solas. Inquisitor,” he said in farewell before he turned to head for his office.

Evie nodded to Cullen and watched him go before she turned to Solas, feeling a thrill run up her spine. She mentally scolded herself; being this giddy and excited at every turn was going to somehow put her in an early grave, she was certain of it. She crossed the space to his desk, the corner of her mouth pulling in a smile. “Yes?” she asked, curious as to what he wanted to discuss. Talking with him was always intriguing, she loved to listen to his stories about the Fade and to hear his theories, and she always found herself hanging on his every word. 

“I apologize, my friend, I did not mean to interrupt your conversation with the Commander. I realize you still have much to discuss with the others after Halamshiral,” he said quietly, his eyes following after the man's retreating back before the door closed and he felt a slight twinge of guilt, but it did not last long. “How are you recovering from the trip?”

“Fairly well, considering none of us have had much time to rest afterwards. I don’t know what Josephine puts in her tea to give her so much energy, but I want some,” she said with a slight laugh. She gave a dismissive wave of her hand. “I’m sure Cullen has more important things to do after our meeting now anyway,” she said. She let her eyes roam over Solas’ form for a moment, feeling her throat go dry. “And you? You seem well rested after such a… an interesting night.”

He chuckled, his sharp gaze tracking her own and he wondered again to himself just what it was about the unique human that drew his attention so. It was so much more than the fact that his mark, his magic was embedded in her skin, and the why drove him nearly mad. Dancing with her to satisfy his curiosity had only fanned the flames rather than extinguish them. “To see the rise and fall of power, mixed with the heady mystery of it all, I had forgotten how much I missed it all.”

Evie quirked an eyebrow at that. “Missed it?” she asked, her tone light and curious, though she found the statement odd. She tried to think back to him ever mentioning being at court before, but everything he’d ever told her before had led her to believe that he was mostly a loner, that he had never been involved in such things. She tipped her head slightly as she studied his eyes. “I didn’t know you had been at court before. When was that?”

Solas mentally cursed himself for the slip, and partially the Inquisitor for catching it. Though, the fact that she did pulled a bit of admiration for her observations of the world. How much careful thought she put into each action. “I... ah... the Fade, of course. I have witnessed the rise and fall of many empires. The courtly intrigue and the Game from my dreams, it has been a long while since I have been able to witness such an event.” He nearly winced, it wasn't one of his better lies. He knew he was getting too close, letting her get too close. 

“Oh! That makes sense,” she said, it all clicking in her head now. She laughed again. “I should have figured that much out on my own, I suppose. Sorry,” she said, feeling a little silly. “Nearly everything you talk about, you’ve witnessed in the Fade. I should have known this would be the same. Just… you usually mention the Fade when you say things like that. So you can’t blame me for being a little confused!” she said, her tone slightly defensive, but playful. She moved around the desk to stand next to him and look down at the notes he had there. “Be easy on me. I just spent the morning with Josephine. My brain is a bit fried,” she said and nudged his shoulder with her own.

He chuckled, feeling a flash of relief coupled with a heat as she sidled up next to him. He let a smile tug at his lips at her eagerness to learn, to soak up knowledge. Part of it hurt him to think that he would inevitability have to end the world she was a part of. There had to be another way.  When he retrieved his orb, he would have to explore all options. He pushed it from his mind and let himself enjoy what little contact he was granted. “It is probably not as urgent as other matters, but I have been doing some calculations of the artifacts that we have been activating.” He indicated their positions on the map he had spread out on the desk. “The way we have been triggering them is putting a strain on the Veil in this location. It is likely to open a rift that will need to be sealed.”

She leaned a little more over the desk, her brow furrowing slightly as she looked at the pointed he indicated. “Well that’s not good,” she muttered softly. “I thought those things were supposed to strengthen the Veil.” She chewed her lip slowly for a moment, then stood up straighter with a sigh. “Well, looks like I’ll just have to go out and seal more rifts. And here I was worried that I’d run out of things to do,” she said, pressing her lips together to keep herself from smirking.

Solas couldn't stop the laugh that escaped his lip., “Your attitude is rather refreshing, Inquisitor. As for the artifacts, they reinforce the Veil, pulling stronger sections of the Veil to the weaker ones. Stretching it so much inevitably weakens another area. With the anchor, I calculate that you will be able to properly bandage it without further tearing occurring, if that makes sense?”

She gave a nod. “That does make more sense,” she said. She turned to look at him, studying his face for a moment. Her heart sank ever so slightly at the way he addressed her. “Solas, you can call me Evie, you know. You don’t have to call me Inquisitor all the time. We… we’re closer than that, aren’t we?” she asked, her tone a little softer, and her expression perhaps a little vulnerable. “It’s like so many have forgotten my name,” she said, looking down at her hands, “I’d like it if those closest to me would remember that… you know… I’m not just the Inquisitor.”

It was a burden he knew all too well. Yet he had no one close to him for the longest time. He had become the Dread Wolf, Fen’Harel, and Solas had been lost. He gave her a small smile, tilting his head at her, his voice quiet. “If that is what you desire, Evie,” he murmured. 

Her breath caught in her chest at the sound of her name on his lips, the low voice he used when he spoke. And something about the way he said “desire” made a heat pool low in her belly. She licked her lips and gave a nod. “I’d like that,” she answered softly, managing a nervous smile. Did he have to look at her like that? There it was again, that feeling that her knees were going to buckle beneath her. Her hand trembled slightly and she flexed her fingers, the same internal war going on within her as it had with Cullen as she tried to work up the nerve to take Solas’ hand. 

“I say, my dear Evelyn, I need to have a word with you about the dismal state of this so-called Inquisition library. The lending policy is in dire need of rewriting. Solas has been hoarding all of the decent books for weeks. It is absolutely impossible for me to do any sort of research,” Dorian drawled as he leaned over the edge of the railing above them as he looked down at the pair, an elegant eyebrow raised at them both. 

Evie took a step back from Solas, feeling as though she had been snapped out of a trance. “Ah, sure. Okay,” she stammered, her face feeling hot. She glanced up at Dorian before she looked at Solas again. “We’ll, ah, we’ll see about getting those rifts closed, yeah?” she asked. Oh, she felt foolish all of a sudden, like she was a child who’d been caught doing something naughty. “We’ll talk later,” she promised Solas in a hushed tone, then turned and headed up the curving stone staircase. “You,” she hissed when she reached the top, narrowing her eyes slightly at Dorian. “Would you quit spying on me?” she scolded and smacked at his arm, though all she managed to do was to draw a smirk from him. “What?”

“Just you. So adorable the way you run around, scooping up all the attractive men in Skyhold. It's terribly rude, you know. If you are getting all the strapping men, who does that leave for me?” He held a hand over his heart, feigning being wounded.

“Not  _ all  _ of them!” she protested, though her face grew even hotter. “Just… just two of them.” She groaned and let her eyes fall shut as she said it, feeling guilty. “Doriannnn,” she whined and stepped closer, letting her forehead fall to his shoulder. “I don’t know what to do. This is all your fault. I blame you.”

He laughed, rubbing her back as he led her to his secluded corner. “What do you mean you don't know what to do? If I were in your shoes, I'd get both of them in bed. Well, I'm not certain about Solas, he strikes me a the type that likes to observe first, but that's beside the point. Both men in bed and enjoy each other. Maker knows we hardly have the luxury of time. But, if you are that torn up about it, I can always take the dear Commander off of your hands.”

Evelyn gasped and pulled back from him. “Dorian!” she scolded and playfully slapped his shoulder again. She bit her bottom lip and laughed low in her throat. “Oh you are so bad. You’re a horrible influence. Or is that Bull rubbing off on you? Putting the idea of threesomes in your head?” She covered her face with her hands, an embarrassed sort of giggle escaping her, and took another step back. “Maker, I don’t know what to do with you. I don’t know what to do with myself. Who the hell put me in charge here, again?”

Dorian felt a heat flash across his cheekbones and he muttered, “Well, he is certainly rubbing _something_ off on me.” He coughed before he waved a hand in the air. “Look, you are a Circle mage from the barbaric south. Sheltered all your life, it’s no wonder that you are feeling intrigued by it all. They are certainly fine specimens, I don't think anyone would blame you. So give them both a try and see which one tickles your fancy more. However, there is a fine line between flirting and leading on and leading on is a cruelty I would not wish on any man.” 

The guilt in her chest only seemed to increase at that and her shoulders sank. “I’m not trying to lead anyone on,” she said. “I don’t want anyone to get hurt. I would feel awful if either of them ended up hurt because of me. Maybe it would be better if I just, you know, distanced myself from both of them instead.” But even as she said it, she felt her heart sink. She gave another heavy sigh. “This is a fine mess I’ve gotten myself into. And I can’t keep relying on you to swoop in and bail me out every time.”

“Evelyn, I believe you are overthinking this a little much. They are both grown men, Solas most definitely. You certainly don't need to be distancing yourself from love. Not when the world is crashing down around us. You more than anyone. What you should do is at the very least be honest with the two of them.”

Evie bit her lips together and nodded. “You’re right. I just… just need some time alone to think about everything,” she said. She could feel a headache coming on. She rubbed at her forehead, then dropped her hand back to her side with a slap. All the giddiness was gone, no more butterflies, all of it replaced by a heavy sense of guilt. “Thanks, Dorian. If anyone needs me, I’ll just be in my quarters,” she muttered and turned to leave.

He reached out and caught her ar., “You know I am the worst person to ask for advice on relationships. Just... listen to yourself. And don't do anything that I wouldn't do. That's a lot of leeway, don't go overboard. And should you need wine, you know where to find me.”

She gave him a grateful smile. “Thanks, Dorian. I’ll keep that in mind.” A slight frown pulled at her lips as she thought about the decision she was going to have to make, whether she liked it or not. “And I’m definitely going to need wine for this,” she said. “Lots and lots of wine.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Solas, a-are you sure about this?” Evie asked nervously as Solas helped her up onto the scaffolding. She gripped his hand a little too tightly, glancing over her shoulder at the floor far below. Heights normally didn’t bother her much, she could walk the battlements of Skyhold just fine, but this rickety scaffolding didn’t seem like it could hold much more that Solas’ slender frame. Her eyes met his again and she could see the amusement in his expression. “Yeah, it’s all funny until this thing gives way and I drag you down with me.”

He chuckled at her and made certain she was steady on her feet before he knelt down to the can of paint he had mixed together for the wet plaster that he had applied to the walls not thirty minutes ago. “You wished to see how I worked, did you not? I assure you that you will not fall. I would catch you, Evie,” he said as he offered up to her a can of paint and a brush, “This section is to be blue. I would be more than grateful for your help.”

“Really?” she smiled as she took the can and the brush from him. She turned to the wall, seeing the outline he’d already created, and she sat herself down on the scaffolding. “Heh, I’ve never really done this before,” she admitted as she carefully dipped the brush into the paint. “Most of my free time before joining the Inquisition was spent just reading.” She stared at the wall for a moment before she began to move the brush over its surface, a sort of satisfaction filling her as the vibrant paint filled in the area. “Reading and learning to control my magic,” she said almost absently. 

He felt his own chest lurch at the thought of her past. He chose his words carefully as he sat next to her with his own can of paint and started work on one of the more intricate parts next to her own, “It still astounds me that someone thought it would be best to lock away those with such a gift from the world. So many things you have been sheltered from. Protected, but at what cost?”

“Is it a gift?” she asked, her brow furrowing slightly as she concentrated on the painting. “Some days it seems more like a curse.” She shrugged and her features relaxed. “I think everyone is just afraid of magic, you know, what it can do. What we can become. But no, I don’t think it’s right to lock people away like that. The training, yes, but the isolation, no.” She paused and glanced over at him. “Be glad you didn’t have to experience any of that.”

He pressed his lips together, thinking over what he did experience. He looked over at her, meeting her eyes as their knees bumped together. His lips burned, how he wanted to share his burden with her, to have someone to confide in with no ill repercussions. “You would be surprised,” he said quietly, “Witnessing it is no easier. To know that you are helpless to do anything about it is worse. For a world to lock away those with magical abilities and the others to only hear the worst of what could happen if mages were allowed to be free… it sickens my heart.”

The corners of her mouth twitched. “Mine too,” she said as she dipped her brush in the paint again. “Sometimes I wonder what it would be like, for people to not fear mages. For the world to have a little less fear and hate in it. Where we were treated like… like equals.” She sighed and moved her brush over the wall again, filling in more of the blank space. “Sounds impossible, doesn’t it? Sometimes I think this fighting between the mages and the templars will never end.”

Solas gave her a sad smile and reached out, placing a hand on her arm as it moved over the wall. Her desire to learn was invigorating and he found himself swamped with a pang of guilt. What would have changed for her if he hadn't done what he did? “Nothing is impossible if you put your mind to it. That doesn't mean that the task ahead will be easy, but the best things, the ones worth fighting for never are. Perhaps, one day, with the efforts of yourself and the Inquisition, you may yet see what you desire.”  _ ‘If only for a moment, _ ’ he thought.

Evie felt butterflies in her stomach as his hand touched her, gently guiding her brush strokes. “Do you really think so?” she asked, uncertain herself. “I never really thought of myself as a leader, but when Cassandra offered it to me… I thought maybe I could really make a difference. For mages, for everyone. Not that I thought I could have fixed it like Divine Justinia could have done, but at least I might have made an impact. But I don’t think I’m succeeding. There’s just so much to be done…” She trailed off and shook her head. “Forgive me. I shouldn’t complain. It’s just… I’ve tasted freedom now, and I like it. When this is all over, I don’t want to go back.”

“You shouldn’t have to be forced to do anything that you do not choose to do freely. As is the right of all living creatures. You give yourself so little credit. You have done more than anyone had ever expected, setting an example for all mages to follow instead of following suit. You have many friends here who would stand by your side and defend you before they would let anything happen to you against your will. Myself included,” he said fiercely, “You should be free to experience the world and magic as you see fit.”

Her heart swelled to hear him say that and she turned to look at him more fully. The fierceness in his eyes and his tone made her want to fling her arms around him, and she would have, had she not been afraid of toppling both of them off of the scaffolding. She’d never heard someone sound so protective over her before. She carefully scooted a little closer to him and tilted her head to rest on his shoulder. “Thank you, Solas,” she said softly. “I know most of our inner circle would support me, but it’s nice to hear you actually say it.”

He smiled softly, feeling the weight of her head on his shoulder, the warmth from her. It was almost ironic, how he was on his own thankless mission with people who would lock him up, kill him for what he had done, yet he was longing for something. A connection that soothed his soul. He almost shook his head at the thought, he certainly didn’t deserve any kindness, nor did he wish his fate on anyone else. Especially not the wondrous spirit he had found in Evelyn. “People often forget to let the truly great leaders and minds know that they are appreciated. Cared for,” he said softly as he turned his head, looking down at her on his shoulder. He didn’t deserve even this act of kindness, but by the stars above, he craved it. 

A soft smile spread across her lips when he turned to look at her. The intensity in his eyes made her heart race and her breath hitch. It would be so easy to close the space between them, their faces already so close together. Was this it? Was he the one she was supposed to choose? She’d tormented herself over the decision, over whether she should choose Solas or Cullen, and even now Dorian’s words about leading on echoed in the back of her mind. Maybe if she kissed him, it would all come clear…

“Solas,” she said softly as she reached up and cupped his cheek, lifting her head from his shoulder to lean in a little closer, inviting him in to kiss her if he wished. Her head seemed to spin, everything around her a bit hazy, so close she could almost feel the warmth of his lips.

“Inquisitor? Are you up there?” Cullen’s voice reached Solas’s ears and the mage nearly cursed his luck as he started back from Evie to turn and peer over the side, seeing the Commander standing down at the bottom looking up at them. His hand rubbing at the back of his neck that Solas had taken as a little nervous tick he did, the faint blush on the man’s cheeks told him that he knew what he had been interrupting. He sighed inwardly. It was just as well; he should know better than to even entertain the thought of some reprieve from his duty.

“Oh!” Evie cried and gave a little jump when she heard Cullen’s voice. She turned suddenly, her hand banging against the can of paint, and she had to grab for it to stop it from tipping over. Her face felt like it must’ve been ten shades of red. And there it was again, that guilty feeling as if she’d been caught doing something she shouldn’t. She gave Solas an apologetic sort of look, then moved to carefully climb down the scaffolding. “Did… did you need something?” she asked Cullen, hoping her tone sounded casual.

Cullen hadn’t meant to interrupt, but he had been on his way through to his office after a long meeting and had been entertaining the idea of starting up a game of chess with someone to wind down, maybe ease the oncoming headache he could feel working it’s way through his skull. Seeing Evelyn and Solas so close together he wasn’t certain what had happened, but he had found himself clearing his throat and speaking before he had barely thought anything of it. His heart ached to get to know the Inquisitor better. As not the Inquisitor but the unique woman who was so kind yet strong. Who always had a kind word for anyone. “Ah, I was hoping that, if you weren’t terribly busy if you would like to join me for that game of chess we talked about?”

“Oh, I, ah, sure,” she agreed, feeling terribly flustered. She glanced over her shoulder at Solas, but he had turned his back to them and was working on his painting again. She bit her lip, knowing she needed to say something to him, but unsure of what she should say. Damn it all. She was so sure she was about to figure everything out, and now this. It left her reeling in confusion even more. “Solas,” she called up to him, “I’ll… um… I’ll come find you later? We can, ah, finish our conversation.” It was lame, so totally lame, and she knew it. She turned to Cullen again. “So, ah, chess. Yes. That sounds good.” She started to walk one way, realized she was heading the wrong direction, and immediately turned around to head towards the garden where the chess set sat, walking a little faster than was necessary.

Cullen felt a flash of guilt at the look that he had seen flash across the elf’s face when he had called out to Evelyn and he wondered if he should have stayed silent, but the thought of losing, well, the chance at something before it even started. If it was even there, he couldn’t have stayed silent even if he had wanted to. “I apologize, Inquisitor. I, Maker, I have the worst timing,” he muttered. 

“No,” she said a little too quickly. “No, you’re fine.” It was a lie; he really did have the worst timing. She cleared her throat uncomfortably. She wasn’t sure what he’d seen or hadn’t seen between her and Solas. “It’s, um… we were just talking.” She gave a nervous laugh. “At least I’m down off that scaffolding. I thought for sure it was going to collapse or something.” She was rambling and she knew it, but her nerves were absolutely frayed at this point. When they reached the little table that held the chess set, she sat herself down and began to quickly arrange the pieces on the board. She slicked a piece of hair out of her face and looked across the table at Cullen, hoping she didn’t look as shaken as she felt. “You didn’t give me any notice to get snacks for us.”

He chuckled softly as he moved and took a seat opposite of her. “Forgive me. My sister tells me I can be a bit scatterbrained at the best of times. With the duties of the war and the Inquisition, I’m afraid it only gets better from this point on,” he said as he watched her slender fingers set up the pieces with a practiced ease. “Did you play a lot while you were in the circle?”

“A bit,” she answered as she set the last piece in place. How strange that he would ask about the circle after she and Solas had just had a similar conversation. Had he been there longer than she realized? That didn’t seem like Cullen, to eavesdrop. She slightly shook her head at herself; he was just making conversation. “Not like there was a whole lot else to do besides study,” she said as she looked across the table at the former templar. “Though I suppose you know that.” She considered the board for a moment, then moved one of the pieces and sat back in her chair. She wondered how their relationship might’ve been different now, if he’d been one of the templars at the circle in Ostwick. “What do you think should happen once this is all over? With the circles and the mages, I mean.”

He glanced up at her, remembering his time in Kinloch Hold. “Perhaps I am not the best person to ask that question. I have not had the best experience with Circles.” He saw her curious gaze at him and he gave her a small smile. “But who is to say what is best for the mages once this whole mess is sorted out. I don’t think that it should go back to the way it was, but I also don’t entirely agree that mages should go unchecked. Not every mage is as skilled as you.”

“I think that sounds reasonable,” she said, watching the board as he moved a piece. She sort of wished she hadn’t asked the question; she’d liked Solas’ answer much better. Though now the questions were burning in her mind, what he thought of the mages, if he could truly care for her, being what she was and he being what he was. She met his eyes again, those warm golden eyes that she could just lose herself in for days if he’d let her. “And how do you see the mages now? Now that you’re, you know, not a templar anymore? Do you… I mean, do you see me differently because I’m a mage? Do you think you could ever…” The words seemed to stick in her mouth as uncertainty and self-consciousness welled up in her chest and she looked down at the board again.

Cullen tilted his head at her, his heart thudding in his chest as he took in the state of her. The way her cheeks had flushed to a beautiful rose color that contrasted so beautifully with her pale hair. “No, I mean… Maker… at first I thought, but you quickly proved me wrong on all accounts. You aren’t like any other I have ever met before. I feel different around you, like I can relax. It’s not something that is an easy feat for me, as you well know.”

“Good,” she said sincerely, a smile pulling at her lips. “You need that. We all need that, to have someone that lets us be ourselves. Someone who sees us as more than just our titles.” She chewed her lip for a moment, thinking over her words, trying to choose them carefully. “I feel the same around you,” she admitted. “I wish things weren’t so hectic around here all the time. That we might have more time to just be… us. That we could spend more time together as just people, and not as the Inquisitor or the Commander.” She paused and gave a soft chuckle, though the sound was almost bitter. “I wish I just had time to think sometimes.”

He laughed, a relief washing over him at her words. “If you figure out how to do that, let me know. I’ve been trying to figure that one out since before we began. There’s just a lot of work to be done, isn’t there? Hard to find enough time to think, let alone enjoy the good company of some select people.” He observed the chessboard a moment before he moved a piece. “My sister is always getting on me when I don’t send her prompt letters. No matter where I am though, she manages to track me down and give me a good letter thrashing. It’s just hard sometimes, finding the right words to say.” 

Evie gave a laugh at that. “Don’t I know it,” she said. “It seems I can never find the right words anymore.” And how true that was. She didn’t know what to say to him, to Solas, or even to herself. “I kept thinking that as time went on, this would become easier. That things would be clearer, that I’d know what to do. But it seems just the opposite. It just becomes more confusing. I’m so afraid that my decisions are going to end up getting someone hurt. And I don’t want that.” She tried to make it sound like she was speaking about the Inquisition, and she was to an extent, but her words carried more weight than that. Maker help her, she didn’t have a clue what she was doing.

Cullen gave her a soft smile and reached across the table to cover her hand with his own. “Don’t think that. You’ve brought a lot of hope and joy to this world when there was none. You’ve got the best inner circle as well. Trust in them as well as yourself. Just because you are the leader doesn’t mean that you have to do this alone.” He tilted his head at her. “You do the best that you can and in the end, that’s all you can do. It’s all anyone can do.” He let his thumb brush over the back of her hand.  

Tingles raced up her arm from his touch and she gave him a smile. It eased the guilt in her heart ever so slightly. “Thank you, Cullen,” she said, her voice nearly a whisper. She turned her hand over beneath his and let her fingers curl around his palm. “And I will do my best. Always. I just hope I can make the right decisions.” She squeezed his hand, meeting his eyes and feeling her heart race all over again. By the Maker, she wished someone would just tell her what to do. She felt so torn. “I don’t know what I would do without my friends, my advisors… without you.”

His heart was pounding in his chest as her hand curled around his own and he licked his lips, his throat suddenly feeling parched. Maker help him, he wasn’t any good at this. “Likewise. It may sound selfish of me, but out of all the people in the world to have survived the Conclave, I am glad that it was you. I am sure that all of our lives would be terribly dull without you in it. But, perhaps enough talk about darker times. It occurs to me I could still learn a thing or two about you. Do you have any family?”

Evelyn considered his question for a moment. “Yes,” she answered hesitantly. “I come from a noble family, but I’m not very close with them. I was eight when they realized I had magical abilities and I was sent to the circle in Ostwick. My mother would write to me occasionally, but that’s all the contact I’ve had with them since.” She gave a shrug and a half-hearted smile as she moved another piece on the board, capturing one of his pieces. “Just part of being a mage, I guess.” It always stung how her family had so easily turned away from her once they’d learned of what she was. “I’m sure there’s something more interesting to learn about me than that,” she said, hoping she hadn’t discouraged him. At least he hadn’t pulled his hand away.

Cullen felt his heart wrench at the look on her face and he could have kicked himself for bringing it up. He gave her hand a squeeze. “I’m sorry to hear that. It’s easy to forget…” He trailed off and shook his head. “I thought perhaps that your family might have been different, might have made more of an effort to stay in touch. Family is everything, isn’t it? It isn’t right that the Circles take you away from that. I wouldn’t know what to do if I didn’t have my brother and sisters with me when I was young.” He sighed, feeling guilt sweep over him, “I wish I was better at staying in touch.”

“I know you’re busy with the Inquisition. I’m sure they know that too,” she tried to reassure him. “Perhaps when this is all over you can take more time to write them, just so they don’t worry about you. From what you’ve said of your sister, I think she worries about you a great deal.” She ran her thumb along the side of his palm, meeting his eyes again. “It’s good to have people who care about you. Let them. It seems so few people have anyone to care for or who care about them these days. Those relationships shouldn’t be wasted. We should cherish every single one that we do have.”

He gave her a small smile. “If only it were that easy, staying in touch.” He looked down at their hands a moment before he met her warm blue eyes again. “And it is odd to have so many people not my family who are close, growing closer to me. I believe you are right, we should cherish those who are close to us. If only everything was so simple. Your views on the world are very refreshing.”

“Maybe I’m just too idealistic,” she said honestly and tore her eyes away from his to look at the chessboard again. Her eyes widened when she realized she was cornered and she looked back up at Cullen. He’d won this round once he made his move. “You!” she exclaimed. She narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips in a playful sort of way, then moved the only piece she could, and sat back with a huff, though she still held his hand. “You little shit,” she teased.

Cullen laughed, rich and deep at her surprised outburst and he smiled at her brightly, “Sorry, it’s a bit of a force of habit. My sister used to beat my brother and I at this game like it was going out of fashion in Orlais. I practiced with my brothers for months with the goal of beating her. The look on her face when we finally won.” He smiled fondly at the memory. “Not unlike your look just now.”

She couldn’t stop herself from laughing. “Good game, Commander,” she said and sat up straighter, giving his hand another squeeze. This was nice, the two of them unbothered by their duties if only for a moment. She chewed her lip, knowing that there was work to be done, but she wondered if perhaps they could prolong it just a little bit more. “One more round?” she asked. “Before we’re called back?”

“I’d love to,” he agreed as his hands moved to set the board up for another round, “Perhaps you’ll win this one.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the kudos and all the views, everyone! We'd love to hear your thoughts so far. We live for comments. :)


	3. Chapter 3

Evelyn flopped herself down on the ground next to the campfire with a sigh. The past week had been exhausting. On top of all the work that needed to be done, the situation with Cullen and Solas wasn’t getting any easier. She enjoyed every moment she spent with either of them. But that’s all it seemed to be now. Moments. They kept interrupting each other, looking for a moment alone with her. And though it didn’t seem that they were doing it intentionally to each other, she could feel their irritation growing. 

She rubbed at her tired eyes. She’d hoped that coming out here to the Hinterlands on a mission would clear her head, but she was sadly disappointed. She barely slept at night, lying there trying to sort it all out in her head. But every time she tried to imagine her life with just one of them, she didn’t know how she could be without the other. 

She was miserable.

“Here,” Cassandra said, offering her a bowl of stew from the pot that hung over the campfire. She could see the exhaustion in Evelyn’s eyes and it worried her. 

“I’m not hungry,” Evie said with a dismissive wave. She leaned her forehead on the heel of her hand, her elbow on her knee. “I just…” She paused as a yawn split her face. “I just wanna sit here for a bit before I try to sleep.”

“Still haven’t figured out what to do about Solas and Cullen, huh?” Iron Bull asked casually as if they were already mid-conversation about it. He chuckled at the way her head slipped from her hand as she jerked and sat up straight, staring at him with wide eyes. “Never fails to amuse me when you all look so surprised that I pick up on those things. Ben’Hassrath, remember?” he said with a slight laugh. “And Dorian talks too much.”

Varric clicked his tongue as he flipped his crossbow over on his lap, continuing to clean the more delicate parts of the weapon. “Didn’t realize that other people’s love lives was an acceptable form of pillow talk, Tiny,” he said before he glanced up, “Or is that just something unique to Tevinter and Qunari relations?” He chuckled and set aside Bianca as Cassandra offered him a bowl.

“It’s the best sort of pillow talk,” Bull chuckled, though he didn’t elaborate as to why. He looked to Evie again, who had groaned and covered her face with her hands. “See? This is why Qunari don’t usually do the relationship thing. Makes it all too complicated. It’d be so much easier if you just slept with both of them and got it out of your system.”

Evie glared at Bull. “That’s not particularly helpful, you know. And I don’t think either of them would think very highly of me if I did that,” she grumbled. She scrubbed at her face again. “I wish someone would just tell me what to do. Well, someone that wouldn’t advise me to just sleep around,” she corrected herself, shooting another look at Bull. She huffed and let her shoulders slump. “Why does this have to be so complicated?”

“Eh, that’s the way the best romances go,” Varric said as he ate, “Just make a list of pros and cons for each one, then throw it away and do what feels right. Just try not to get hurt along the way, with all parties involved.” He looked back down at his meal, trying to pull his mind away from where the conversation led him. “No one likes being the third wheel.”

“That’s what I’m so afraid of!” Evie cried. “I feel like if I choose one or the other, the other is going to end up hurt. But if I don’t make a decision, then everyone ends up hurt. I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t.” She sighed again. “And I don’t want to lead anyone on. Dorian already warned me about that.”

“I still say you do what Dorian suggested and just take them both to bed with you,” Bull said, a sly sort of grin spreading across his face. He finished off his stew and set the bowl aside, then laid to his side and propped himself on his elbow. 

“Take them both… You cannot be serious, Bull,” Cassandra protested. Most of this was new information to her, but that advice seemed poor at best. She shook her head in a disapproving sort of way. “You need to make a decision quickly before someone gets hurt and it causes problems in the Inquisition. And before someone decides to write the whole messy ordeal into a book,” she added with a jerk of her head at Varric. 

Varric couldn’t stop the chuckle that escaped him. “Hey, they’d have to wait. I’m still working on the Tevinter and Qunari book. Besides, Seeker, don’t act like you wouldn’t read it. I know your deepest, darkest secret now.” He looked over at Evie, seeing the sad look on her face. She looked as though she was about to throw up. “Easy there, Inquisitor. Don’t think about this too hard. They are grown men and haven’t exactly said what they wanted, have they? They’ll understand and respect whomever you choose.”

“Someone’s still going to get hurt,” she whispered in a defeated sort of way. She felt sick. The longer this went on, the worse it was going to be. Still, something in the back of her head nagged at her that maybe she could prolong the inevitable, that she would be given a sign as to who she should choose. They would be heading back to Skyhold in the morning and she didn’t know if she could make up her mind by then. “Fuck it. I’m just gonna be celibate.”

The dwarf laughed at that. “You let us know how that goes. You have enough stress on your plate as it is with the Inquisition. Try not to worry about the good bits so much that it makes you sick. Otherwise, what’s the point?” 

“But how can I not?” Evelyn asked, letting her hands flop in her lap. “It’s ALL I can seem to think about. It’s distracting me. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep. I’m heartsick over this whole thing. I feel like some bloody foolish teenager.” She grabbed at her hair, a growl in her throat. “Why does it have to be like this?” she whined. She chewed her lip before she looked at them all in turn. “What would you all do? Not you,” she said, pointing at Bull, “I know what you would do.”

The Qunari laughed heartily. “Fair enough, Boss. But I still say my way is the best.”

“Do not ask me such things,” Cassandra said stiffly as she stirred her spoon around in her bowl. “It would seem to me that you are equally matched with either of them. Stop fussing over it and make a decision, then stick to it. Do not second guess yourself. It is only hurting you more in the long run, along with everyone else involved. How you got so far into this as it stands is beyond my understanding.”

Varric waved his hand in the air. “You know I don’t like to get involved in these kinds of things. Mostly because I don’t like to get on a woman’s bad side.” He shot a glance at Cassandra, grinning at the look she gave him, “Yes, Seeker, even yours. Besides, Inquisitor, I’m hardly the person to ask. I was the one that didn’t get picked and I’m just fine for it.” 

Evie gave them all a deadpan stare. “You’re all fired,” she muttered and got to her feet. She brushed the dirt from her pants, huffing and grumbling under her breath. None of their answers really helped. “I’m going to bed. If anyone cares,” she said and turned to head for her tent, though she knew she wouldn’t sleep well at all.

* * *

 

Evelyn wasn’t the only one who didn’t sleep well. Solas sat at his desk, trying to focus on the open book before him. But he couldn’t. The only thing he could think of was Evie. The way she seemed to be a breath of fresh air in this world, how she was so eager to learn, how she saw people for who they truly were without judgment. He never expected to find that here, especially with a human. And yet, he could not get her out of his mind.

He knew it was foolish, he knew he didn’t deserve to be happy. Not after everything that he’d done. He’d spoken to spirits in the Fade about his predicament, thinking perhaps they would tell him what he needed to hear to clear his head, but they offered no help, insisting instead that he deserved whatever happiness he could find. 

While it strengthened his resolve to finally tell Evie of his true feelings, there was still one problem to address. 

Cullen.

Every time Solas tried to spend time with Evelyn in private, it seemed that the Commander managed to interrupt them. And every time he went looking to find Evelyn, it seemed he interrupted her time with Cullen. It was beyond infuriating at this point and he knew that Cullen surely had to feel the same. He didn’t know how much longer he could take this.

“Enough,” he muttered to himself and got to his feet, looking towards the door that would lead him straight to Cullen’s office. Before he lost his nerve or second guessed himself, he strode forward, determined to speak with the Commander about it all. Evelyn would return to Skyhold that day, and he needed answers before they all lost their minds. He knocked on the door to Cullen’s office and let himself inside. “If I may have a word, Commander?”

Cullen started, deep into the latest report from Leliana’s scouting groups in Crestwood, and he looked up at Solas. It was odd to see the elf coming to him for something and he sat up straighter, running a hand through his hair as he leaned back. “Please. You’ll save me from these dreadful reports. Leliana is still trying to use some of the… ah… dirt from the Winter Palace and I am still getting letters that should be used as kindling. Like these reports.” He glared at them for a moment. “What can I do for you?”

Solas carefully closed the door behind him, then crossed the room to Cullen’s desk, clasping his hands behind his back. He’d always had respect for the Commander, and he hoped that they could have this conversation without argument. “I believe we are long overdue for a conversation we have both been avoiding. But I feel it cannot wait any longer. It is about the Inquisitor.”

Cullen hoped he didn’t visibly wince, it was a topic he was hoping to avoid altogether, but he knew that wasn't going to be an option. He nodded at the elf and stood up from his desk, gesturing towards the other door that lead to the battlements. “I think we will both need fresh air for this talk,” he said, his heart pounding. Solas was fighting for her. And what had he done? Offered her chess games and talks? He cringed inwardly and he knew he wanted to fight for Evelyn.

Solas inclined his head and followed Cullen out of the office. He appreciated the gesture. Being outside of the office which was distinctly Cullen’s space put them on more even footing for this conversation. The man was nothing if not considerate. “I’m certain you’ve noticed the way we keep… stumbling over each other. I assure you, it is not deliberate on my part. And I do not believe you intentionally do it either. But the three of us cannot carry on like this. Someone is going to end up hurt. And I do not wish that.”

The man nodded, sparing a glance at the elf and saw the truth behind his words. He was a man who did not wish to do harm to another. Even with the current situation. “Nor do I, but Maker…” He breathed and ran a hand through his hair. “The timing is terrible. I think that’s on my part. I have never been in the right place at the right time,” he confessed, “I don’t mean to get in anyone’s way, but she’s a remarkable woman. I’m not certain if I could give up on her just because another man was interested.”

“I agree with you,” Solas said as they slowly walked the battlements in the cool air. “On all points.” The timing really was terrible. If he’d met her before, if somehow the world hadn’t changed so drastically from when he’d created the Veil… Something in the back of his mind told him to walk away, that she deserved to be happy while he did not, and yet he could not do it. “This is not so unique a situation as we would probably like to think. And yet I do not know how to proceed. But something must be done.” He paused their walk and looked out over the landscape, his eyes following the trail that he knew would lead the Inquisitor back to Skyhold in just a few short hours. “I am not ready to give up on her either. We must reach some sort of agreement.”

Cullen turned his head, meeting Solas’s eyes. “You make it sound as if she is some sort of business arrangement.” He shook his head and pinched his brow. “Forgive me, I know that is not what you meant. Everything seems to be a battle now, doesn’t it? A war over something.” He moved and leaned against the side of the stones, letting the cold wind brush his face and comb through his hair. “I would fight you for her, but she isn’t some prize to be won. She deserves to choose her own fate. Could be one of us, could be neither of us.”

A slow smile spread across Solas’ lips. “Then we are on the same page, Commander,” he said. “I do not wish to fight you for Evelyn’s affections, in any sense of the word. I respect you and her more than that. It is not our place to decide this for her. But I fear that if we do not say something, she may never make that decision and we will be trapped forever in this dance.” 

He moved to rest his elbow on the stone wall, considering the Commander for a moment. “I have an idea, if you are willing to listen. When she returns today, after she’s had a moment to settle in of course, I think we should both speak to her. Let her know we both care for her. But she must choose.” He looked down at his hands for a moment before he looked up at Cullen again. “I do not wish to pressure her, or put her on the spot. We will give her time to think about it. And until she makes her decision, perhaps it would be best if we gave her some space. But most importantly, we both agree to whatever she decides. I do not want any hostility between us, Cullen. We work too closely together to allow such dissension.”

Cullen raised an eyebrow at the man, at the very thought out response and tactic he had for the situation. He thought about what Evie meant to him, what the relationship he and Solas had and how it all meshed together. It was just another situation of him being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or some version of that. “I am not certain if I would agree to that within the heat of the moment. I seem to be down on my luck when it comes to love.” He sighed out loud and looked out over the mountains. “But she deserves to choose for herself. I will agree. No matter who she chooses, I will bear you no ill will.” He turned towards the elf and held out his hand. “She would be lucky to have you by her side.”

“And you as well,” Solas said as he took Cullen’s hand and shook it firmly. Though something panged in his heart; the Commander almost looked defeated already and Solas realized that it was already too late. One of them was going to be hurt. “Do not lose your confidence now, Cullen. No matter what happens, I would hope that our… friendship is not damaged by this. For if that happens, then we all end up hurt.” He released Cullen’s hand and a small smile crossed his lips. “And should she choose neither of us, then I suppose we may have plenty time for more games of chess.”

Cullen laughed at that, the thought coming to him as the two of them, old and weathered in their age. Bickering and still playing a game of chess. “Perhaps I should challenge you to a game right now so I can study your moves for the next few years… give or take,” he said, smiling at the apostate and looked off towards the garden, “Winner gets to announce to Evie what all we’ve been up to?”

Solas smirked as he fell into step next to Cullen. “If that is the reward, perhaps I shall let you win this round.”


	4. Chapter 4

Evelyn sat on the throne in the Great Hall, her eye twitching as Josephine explained the judgment she was supposed to render as the Inquisitor. As soon as she’d arrived back at Skyhold, she’d been ushered into the Great Hall and now sat there, staring at a large wooden box. Flies buzzed noisily around it, a foul odor that smelled of rotten meat filled the air, and a suspicious dark liquid oozed from it. 

“I’m supposed to be judging a box?” she asked, half-amused, half-exasperated. She was in no mood for this. She could see Josephine nearly gagging at the smell and she sighed. “I call for rehabilitation! The skull shall do public theatre about the evils of evil.” She could see Josephine’s spine stiffen, about to protest that she got the point, but Evelyn continued. “I also judge the box! End table for orphans!” she cried, pointing at it.

“That’s quite enough, Inquisitor,” Josephine finally interrupted, sounding breathlessly sick, like she was trying very hard not to inhale any more of the smell. “Point taken.”

“Good. Are we done here?” Evie asked as she stood up to leave. “Get that thing out of here. It’s stinking up the whole place.” She huffed and turned to head towards her quarters, but stopped in her tracks when she saw Solas and Cullen standing there. Oh Maker, what was this about? She offered them a timid smile. “Everything okay?”

Cullen shot a glance towards Solas, almost entirely certain that the elf had staged his defeat as he swallowed thickly, clearing his voice. “Evelyn,” he purred quietly. Just because Solas won the game didn’t mean he won the war, “Everything is fine. There are just a few things that Solas and I wish to discuss with you.” He coughed as he looked around the Great Hall. He could almost feel the thoughts and expressions of those around him. “In private.”

“Alright,” she said, looking from him to Solas, then stepped between them to unlock the door to her quarters. She felt more nerves and butterflies fill her stomach than ever before as she let both men into her room. She’d never invited either of them there before, and it felt strangely intimate to have them there now. “Sorry I didn’t have a chance to get cleaned up before this. Josephine practically held me at knife-point and made me judge that stupid box,” she said as she led the way up the stairs. A small sigh of relief escaped her when she reached the top; at least the servants had made her bed and tidied up her room a bit. She’d been so preoccupied with other things before she left, she hadn’t bothered to do it herself. 

She turned to face them, her heart racing and a sinking feeling pooling in her stomach. “Sooooo… what did you want to discuss?” she asked, hoping she sounded casual, though she didn’t feel it at all.

Cullen shared an expression with Solas a moment before he turned towards Evelyn. He sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. “Us,” he said bluntly before he started and waved his hands around, “I mean, just us. You know? We’ve picked up on the flirting bits, but it’s a bit too much for us to keep up with. We are, if you’ll allow me to speak freely, we are tired of being a step behind, always interrupting each other. We want more than that.” 

Evie felt her heart stop. “I… I’m so sorry,” she said quietly, swallowing the hard lump that formed in her throat. She covered her face with her hands and took a deep breath, trying to quickly sort her thoughts. She dragged her hands down her face, pulling at the skin. “I didn’t mean for this to happen. I wasn’t trying to lead either of you on. I… I care about you. Both of you. This… I feel awful,” she muttered, her shoulders dropping. “Please forgive me. This isn’t how I want things to be between us.” She sighed and gave them both an apologetic look. “So what do we do?”

“Nor is it how we imagined things as well,” Solas admitted as he looked towards the Commander a moment before he focused on Evie, “We both agreed that making you feel guilty was the least desirable of effects. We just wanted you to know that we felt it was time for you to pick one or the other.”

If it were possible, her heart seemed to sink even more. The thought of hurting either one of them broke her heart. And this was all her fault. Her eyes stung and she blinked them several times to clear her vision. “Alright,” she said, clenching her jaw and nodding stiffly. She looked between the two of them, her heart banging so hard against her ribs she thought it might burst from her chest. “Am I supposed to make this decision now? This minute?”

Solas gave a soft chuckle and a sympathetic look. “Of course not. Neither of us would put you on the spot like that,” he said, his voice soft and kind. It tore him apart to see the distraught look in her eyes and he knew then that she cared for them as equally as they cared for her. It was a difficult situation at best. “Cullen and I have agreed to give you your space. As much as you need. And whatever you decide, we will respect it.” He had the urge to touch her, to comfort her, to let her know that she would not anger him should she choose Cullen instead. But he thought it best not to. He did not want to influence her choice anymore than he already had. 

Evie bit her lips together and nodded slowly. She refused to cry in front of them, though her heart ached to know that she would have to hurt one of them to avoid hurting both of them even more in the long run. “Thank you,” she said, her voice just above a whisper because she feared her voice may crack if she spoke any louder. She hesitated for a moment before she moved forward to hug him. A warmth seemed to seep into her as he wrapped her up in his arms, holding her tightly for a moment. “I am sorry,” she whispered.

“Do not be sorry,” he answered, speaking just loud enough to make certain that Cullen could hear. He didn’t want the Commander to think he was trying to sway her. But the feel of her in his arms made his heart ache and beat a little faster, wishing he could always hold her like this. He had to swallow hard to speak again. “Take your time. Follow your heart. That’s all we can ask of you.”

She pulled back from him and turned to Cullen, hesitating again before she moved to wrap her arms around his neck. “I’m sorry I put all of us in this position,” she murmured, and the same feeling bloomed in her chest again. That warmth, that security that she’d never had in her life. She squeezed him a little tighter, her face buried in the softness of the mantle around his neck. “I’m so sorry.”

Cullen looked over to Solas before he smiled down at the Inquisitor and hugged her tightly. “Hush,” he soothed, rubbing his hands over her back as she hugged him tightly and he felt his own heart ache at the thought that she might choose Solas over him. That he might never get to feel her in an embrace like this ever again. He had agreed with the elf though and he was right. Evie didn’t need to feel the guilt from choosing one or the other. She deserved to be happy. 

She pulled away from him and took a step back. Maker, this felt like an impossible decision. She’d made hundreds of decisions since joining the Inquisition, many of them that laid heavy on her heart, but none like this. “I won’t make you wait long,” she promised them. “Just… just give me a bit to sort it all out in my head. I need some time alone.” She turned away from them then, to hide the tears she felt brimming in her eyes, and she waited until she heard them walk down the stairs and the door shut before she let out a long exhale and let herself fall face-first onto her bed.

* * *

 

The next few hours had to have been some of the most excruciating of her life. She took the time to soak in a hot bath, thinking that would help clear her head, but it didn’t work. She paced her room, talking to herself over and over, trying to reason with herself about who would be the better choice. It even got to the point where she was arguing with herself. Surely anyone would’ve thought she’d lost her mind if they’d walked in to find her like that, naked and with a tear-soaked face, cursing at herself. 

But no matter what point she argued, that she had more in common with one or the other, she kept coming back to a stalemate. Both seemed equally the better choice, and no matter which way she looked at it, she couldn’t see her life without either of them. 

“Maker damn it all,” she cursed under her breath, wiping another tear from her cheek as she turned on her heel to pace across the room again. She ran her fingers through her knotted hair, pulling at it in frustration. “I can’t make this decision! I can’t!” She huffed and turned on her heel again, walking back the way she’d come. “You have to, stupid. You can’t keep doing this to them!” She banged the heel of her hand against her forehead and turned again, preparing to argue with herself again, when a figure suddenly appeared cross-legged on her bed and she let out a scream. “COLE!” she cried, stumbling backwards. “Wh-what are you… I’M NAKED!”

The spirit blinked after her, his eyes wide. “You aren’t naked all the time?” he asked before he shook his head, “It hurts. The pain, split down the middle. Who do I choose, one or the other. Keep coming back to square one. Both complete each other where the other ends, I can’t pick. Maker, why did they make me pick?” He looked back to her, “They wanted you to pick because they can’t. They don’t want to fight over you. Not a prize to be won, but Maker, please pick me.” He tilted his head at the Inquisitor. “Why not choose both?” 

“Now you sound like Bull,” she accused as she hurriedly wrapped herself up in her robe. She sighed and slicked her still-damp hair out of her face and looked at the spirit sitting on her bed. “It doesn’t work like that, Cole. I can’t just choose both.” She sighed and looked down at her bare feet. “Maker, I wish I could,” she muttered. It warmed her heart to hear him say that they didn’t look at her as some sort of trophy to win, just something to parade around proudly. They both cared for her, just as she cared for them. And that didn’t make it any easier. 

She walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. “I guess you must’ve heard me screaming in my head, huh?” she asked and patted him on the knee. “Sorry for that. I’m just so confused and I don’t know what to do.” She sighed and looked at him. “What do they want? I mean, really want?”

Cole looked at her, reaching out and tucking a damp strand of hair behind her ear. “They both want you to be happy. Both are willing to sacrifice their happiness for yours,” he murmured, “They are confused too, both of them screaming out on the inside, just like you. They both need so much, a kind soul to see past their faults, their mistakes. Kind and gentle, something past war.” He looked up at the Inquisitor sadly, “They  _ need _ both.”

Evie’s brow furrowed as she considered his words. They both wanted to be happy, they both wanted her. And they wanted her to be happy. But what would make her happy?  _ ‘Both of them,’  _ a voice whispered in the back of her head. And suddenly, Dorian’s suggestion didn’t seem so crazy. She looked up, her eyes wide, and turned to Cole. “Cole, can I ask you to do something for me? I want you to go to Solas and Cullen and ask them to meet me here. I know it’s getting late, but tell them I’ve made my decision. Don’t tell them anything else. Please?”

Cole blinked his eyes at her and he nodded. “You are going to ask them, aren’t you?” he asked, but he stood the next moment. “You won’t have to ask. Not much. I hope they like this choice. They are in so much pain, they deserve to be happy,” he mumbled to himself before he vanished in a cloud of smoke.

Evie jumped up and hurried over to grab her brush, yanking it through the tangles of her hair. She thought she should look at least somewhat decent before she proposed her solution or they both might run away. She had almost finished brushing her hair and hadn’t had a chance to pull on her clothes when she heard a knock at the door and footsteps on the stairs. She pulled her robe a little tighter around herself and spun around to see Cullen and Solas, both of them looking a little excited and a little terrified. She cleared her throat nervously and tried to smile. “Hi.” She had to stop herself from smacking her own forehead. Really? That was the best she could come up with? Lame.

Solas blinked, taking in the state of her. She looked a fright, her hair still slightly a mess, the brush in her hand, wearing nothing but a robe. Yet somehow her appearance was only that more endearing. “Evie?” he asked, taking a concerned step towards her. “Are you alright?”

She nodded, feeling her heart starting to race again. “Yes,” she answered, walking towards her bed. “I want to talk to both of you, and I want you to hear me out. Please?” she asked as she sat down and propped the pillows up against the headboard. “Sit with me?”

Cullen felt a blush creep across his cheeks at her request. Seeing her sit upon the bed in nothing but her robe, the way the fabric trailed up her smooth legs. He coughed and reached back to rub at the back of his neck. “I ah… that is… It’s not proper,” he muttered and shifted on his feet. He stepped closer when Solas walked towards the bed though and he stopped a respectful few feet from where she sat.

A confidence she hadn’t felt before burned in Evie and it shone in her eyes. “I’m through with being proper,” she said boldly, her shoulders squared a bit as she looked at him. “Now please sit.” She caught the flash of approval in Solas’ eyes, the way the corner of his mouth twitched ever so slightly. She looked at Cullen expectantly and didn’t speak until he reluctantly perched himself on the edge of the bed. Another inch and he would’ve slipped off and hit the floor. She drew a breath to steel her nerve, but kept her expression calm. “I’ve been thinking about nothing but this situation with you both for longer than I care to admit,” she began. “I’ve driven myself nuts trying to figure it out. I want to be happy. And I want both of you to be happy. And I think you both want me to be happy. So I cannot choose between you.”

Solas felt his heart sink. He’d worried that this would be her decision, that she would walk away from both of them to spare one the hurt of her choosing the other. And it hurt. It hurt so much more than he would ever voice aloud. But what hurt even more was the thought of her walking away from the chance to be happy just to save them some sort of jealousy or hurt feelings. “No,” he said with a shake of his head. “I will not let you give up a chance for happiness. If you cannot make the choice between myself and Cullen, then choose him. I would rather see you happy with him than miserable and alone.”

Cullen felt his heart wrench and his gaze snapped over to the mage. “No, don’t. Solas deserves to be happy as much as I, if not more. Choose him instead.” He insisted. It warmed his heart to know that Solas would do that for him, but it didn’t seem right. To know that he surrendered his own happiness so quickly to ensure Evelyn’s, “The choice is hers. We agreed on that. I cannot in good conscience let you give up so easily. Evie, whomever you choose, we will be fine. I swear it to you. It would hurt us more to see you unhappy because of us.”

Though Evie knew Cullen didn’t fully understand at that point what he was agreeing to, she felt her heart leap. “You mean that?” she asked, almost a little too eagerly. She’d been ready to snap at them to hush, to hear her out, that she wasn’t walking away from either of them. But now, she decided to run with this. And it warmed her heart that they were both willing to sacrifice to make her happy. That was more than she ever expected of either of them, and certainly more than she deserved. She licked her lips. She knew this was crazy. “There’s only one way that we can all be happy. I choose both of you.”

Whatever argument Cullen had on his lips to counter what Evie had been about to say, died when he processed the words that came out of her mouth. He blinked at her, his jaw opening and closing as he tried to think of something to say. Both? How in the world could she choose both? “Evelyn?” he asked, chancing a look over at Solas as well, to see if he was as lost as he was.

Solas’ spine went stiff, though he tried not to show his surprise in his expression. “Well I was not expecting that,” he said, his tone calm as ever. Her words were still sinking in, he was still trying to process it. He cleared his throat and shifted on the bed to face her more fully, and so he could watch Cullen’s body language a bit better as well. He could see the alarm in the Commander’s face. “We agreed to hear her out,” he gently reminded the other man before he looked to the Inquisitor. “Alright, Evie. You have my curiosity.” Though he really wasn’t certain how he felt about this proposition, he told himself he could at least keep an open mind.

Well at least they hadn’t run screaming from the room. She felt encouraged by it and she sat up a little straighter. “I… I haven’t got it all worked out in my head just yet,” she admitted. “But I know that I cannot be happy without both of you. I care about both of you too much. And we’ve all had so little time to get to know one another outside of our work. I thought, perhaps, the three of us could find a way to make this work, to make each other happy.”

Cullen wasn’t certain what he was hearing and he ran a hand through his hair as he listened to the Inquisitor explain her reasoning. “The three of us?” he questioned, looking up at her, his gaze flickering to Solas and his mind was near a melting point. “What way could we possibly make this work? I agree that I don’t want to see any of us hurt because of this, but I…” the words stuck to his throat as he glanced at the elf again, “I wouldn’t be comfortable  _ sharing _ you.”

Evie took a moment to hold her patience. She needed to explain herself better. “I don’t mean me going back and forth between you two. We’ve seen how well that works,” she said, keeping her tone calm. “I mean, the three of us together. We could take it slow, just spend some time together, see how it goes. Maybe the three of us could have dinner together. Alone, without distractions?” she gently suggested. “I really feel like we could make this work if we wanted.”

The term “threesome” flitted through Solas’ mind, and he wasn’t entirely sure how that made him feel. There was a certain awkwardness he immediately felt towards the Commander and though it wasn’t intentional, his posture stiffened. “I am not sure this is something I can agree to so easily, Evie,” he said, still managing to keep his voice calm. He chanced a glance at Cullen. “And I’m not sure if Cullen feels comfortable with this arrangement either.”

She felt her heart starting to sink again, but she was determined not to give up. Not yet. She licked her lips as she considered her words. “Could you… Do you think you could just try? For me? I’m not inviting you both into my bed. Well,” she paused and blushed, realizing they were both sitting on her bed at that very moment. “Not like that. Not yet. I just wanted the three of us to do a few things together, see if we could get along. Just… test the waters, so to speak? If it doesn’t work, then we can go from there. I just can’t walk away from either of you right now.”

Cullen felt stifled in that moment and he pushed himself from the bed, moving towards the balcony and opening the doors quickly before he stepped outside into the mountain air. He sucked in a greedy breath of air as his mind tumbled over the Inquisitor’s words. The both of them. At the same time. He squeezed his eyes shut, his stomach doing flips as he couldn’t even begin to think of what that situation would be like. He was an ex-Templar, a man who followed the word of the Maker. He didn’t… even begin to fancy threesomes, let alone with another man entirely. Even if it was for Evie, he wasn’t certain if he could do it.

“I’ve scared him,” Evie deadpanned, watching Cullen on the balcony.

Solas could see the look in Evie’s eyes and he reached out, placing his hand on her bare ankle, his long fingers curling around it. “He just needs a moment,” he assured her. Though he himself needed a moment as well. This was a lot she was asking of them. He turned to watch Cullen, rolling the options over in his mind. “Allow me to speak to him,” he said softly and got to his feet, taking his time to walk across her room and out onto the balcony.

The Commander looked visibly distraught, and Solas closed the door behind him so they could speak privately for a moment. “It is a lot to consider,” he said, clasping his hands behind his back and looking out over the darkened mountains. There was an uncomfortable feeling in his stomach, though he tried to ignore it and keep his mind open. He watched Cullen out of the corner of his eye as the man ran a hand through his hair, rubbed at the back of his neck, pacing and trying to breathe. “Speak freely, Cullen,” he said. “There is no point in holding it in now.”

Cullen looked over to Solas as he joined him on the balcony and it was as if all the air in the world had vanished. He found himself shaking his head as he turned from the elf and looked out over the rest of Skyhold, his gaze flickering down towards the ground. He wasn’t certain what to say about the whole situation. “I don’t know what she expects of us. I’m not…” He ran a hand through his hair again and he was certain he was going to be missing patches before the night was out. “I don’t fancy men. I don’t see how this is going to end up as anything other than a disaster and heartbreak for us all. You’re a fine man, Solas, it’s just… not my cup of tea.” 

Solas gave a slight chuckle. “Nor is it mine. But I am willing to keep an open mind.” He held up a hand at the look Cullen gave him. “Am I attracted to you? No. Not particularly.” He paused and considered the Commander for a moment, giving him a sweeping look. “But I respect you. I admire you. I know you are a good man with noble intentions, that you are selfless and you give of yourself wholeheartedly to any cause you deem worthy. And I would trust you in battle, both with my life and the lives of those we consider close. And those are qualities worthy of building a relationship upon.” He moved to lean his elbow against the railing, part of him wondering what in the world he was doing. “It is an odd situation she has proposed to us. I am not certain it could work. But as she said, it’s not as though she’s inviting us into her bed tonight. Surely one dinner between the three of us could not hurt?”

Cullen worked his lip between his teeth as he regarded the other man before he turned, bracing his hands on the railing as he leaned on them. The whole situation was wrong. It had to be, wasn’t it? And here he was faced with the idea of a polygamous relationship with another man of all things. His thoughts kept drifting to the thought of sharing a bed, sharing a woman and he wasn’t entirely thrilled about that idea. “Maker, she’s serious about this, isn’t she?”

“I don’t think she would have brought it up otherwise,” Solas answered. He sighed and turned to lean both elbows on the railing, looking out over the mountains again. Why wasn’t he more hung up about the idea, just as Cullen was? Perhaps he was more secure with himself than the Commander. Or maybe something about it appealed to his rebellious nature. “I do not think she means for you and I to… engage in any sort of romance,” he said uncomfortably. “More that the three of us are present together.” He sighed and bowed his head, a frown pulling slightly at his lips, and he covered his eyes with a hand, rubbing at his temples. “I never would have dreamed of ever entertaining such an idea before. I do not know what has come over me.”

The Commander winced at the thought and let out a slow stream of air. “Perhaps… she just needs more time. We have gotten into that terrible habit of interrupting each other with her. Perhaps this way we won’t be interrupted and she can decide who she wants to be with.” He looked back over his shoulder at Evie who was pacing around in the space before her bed, looking as pale as he felt. “I could at least try that. I’m not certain about any of this.” He wasn’t certain he could also perform with a bloody audience. The thought of sharing Evelyn, being in a small space with Solas wearing nothing but small clothes… He suppressed the shudder that went through him. It did nothing for him.

“I’m not even certain that she is sure about this,” Solas offered. He sighed and looked out at the mountains again, trying to draw some sort of strength from them. “I am not certain about this.” He pushed away from the railing and turned to look at Cullen, uncertain of how he should feel about the other man now. Before, he could almost see Cullen as a friendly rival, but now? What would he consider him to be now? He didn’t know. He drew a breath, steeling his resolve to at least consider the chance that this might somehow work. It was an interesting idea, to say the least. “One meal together won’t hurt,” he said, though he wasn’t sure if he was trying to reassure Cullen or himself. “Agreed?”

Cullen turned, looking at the elf again and considered his words. One meal. He could handle one meal. He nodded and stood up straighter. “One meal couldn’t hurt. It might bring more clarity on the situation. Maker, I’m not sure how I should feel about this.” He looked back into the room and swallowed before he gestured inside. “I suppose we’ve kept her waiting long enough then.” He needed more time to think on the whole situation. Maybe over a cold ale.

Evie spun on her heel when she heard the door open and both men stepped inside. She wrapped her arms around herself to hide the way her hands shook. What had she done? This was what she got for listening to Dorian, to Bull. She was going to lose them both now, she was certain of it. She steeled herself and looked between them as they stood in front of her, and she cleared her throat. “Did you decide anything?” she asked, her voice a little breathless.

Cullen looked at Solas before he cleared his throat and felt a heated blush spread over his cheeks. “We, ah, decided that perhaps one meal together wouldn’t hurt. I’m not certain about this, but perhaps a dinner together would clear up some things between us.” He swallowed thickly and rubbed the back of his neck, the skin already feeling chafed from being touched too many times in the span of a few minutes. “I am not certain if this will work, or even get off the ground, but we can try.”

Evelyn felt her spirits lift immediately and for a moment, she didn’t dare to believe it. Could this crazy idea work? Her heart raced and, oh, there it was again. That happy, fluttery, silly feeling that she usually got when around either of them. But she’d never felt it while standing near both of them at the same time. And she took that as a good sign. She beamed at both of them. “Should we have lunch tomorrow?” she suggested, trying to think of somewhere private for just the three of them. “I could ask the servants in the kitchen to pack a picnic. That would get us away from prying eyes.”

Solas rather liked that idea. It sounded informal, where they could relax a bit, and no one in Skyhold would bat an eye at three colleagues having lunch together. Well, save for the inner circle, of course. But he wasn’t concerned about them at the moment. “I think that sounds like an excellent plan,” he said. He looked from her to Cullen, directing his question at both of them. “Shall we meet in the Great Hall tomorrow, then? Around noon or so?”

Cullen found himself nodding. “I will see if I can clear my schedule around that time. It’ll be a feat if I can get Leliana’s messengers to stop following me around for five minutes, but I will see what I can manage.” It was just lunch. Just the three of them. He could do that. It wasn’t going to be that awkward… he hoped. 

A mischievous little gleam flashed in Evelyn’s eyes and she wrinkled her nose. “I think I can do something about that,” she said. “All I have to do is bribe Sera with some pie and she’ll keep them off of you for a few hours.” She couldn’t stop herself from giggling at the thought of it. She was just so happy that they had agreed to at least give this a try.

Solas fought the urge to roll his eyes at the mention of Sera. “I will pretend I did not hear that,” he said, though a smile quirked the corners of his mouth. Evie truly looked beautiful with that light in her eyes, her hair down and messy. His mind quickly drifted to other scenarios where she might look even more disheveled, but he blinked and pushed them from his mind. Not now. Now was about them getting to know one another better first before they did anything of that sort. 

Evie grinned. “Then it’s a date.” She felt nervous and excited, trying to plan it all out in her head, though it really was like nothing she’d ever done before. She wanted to continue talking with them, but the hour was late and she knew she’d already dropped a lot in their laps. “We should… probably get some sleep,” she said reluctantly. 

Cullen nodded and for a moment, he wasn’t entirely certain what to do in this situation. He reached out, catching Evelyn’s hand and brought her knuckles to his lips where he pressed a soft kiss. “Until tomorrow then,” he murmured before he stepped away and gave a curt nod to Solas before he turned to leave the room. He had a lot to think about.

Oh, this was not going to work. Solas already felt the slightest flash of jealousy when Cullen kissed her hand, though as always, he managed to hide it in his expression. He reached out and brushed a piece of Evelyn’s hair behind her ear, letting his fingertips linger for just a moment. “Goodnight, Evie,” he said and turned to follow Cullen out of the room, his own mind reeling with what he’d just agreed to.

Evie watched them go, her hand and her ear tingling and her heart about to jump out of her chest. This was going to work. No one had to get hurt and they could all be happy. She barely dared to believe it. She fell back on her bed with a contented sigh, thinking about what tomorrow would bring, and for the first time in several nights, she finally got a full night’s sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Evie awoke the next morning, feeling giddy and excited, and for a moment she couldn’t remember why. But then the night before came flooding back to her and she grinned brightly. Today she was trying something new, something that she knew would make her happy. And hopefully, it would make Cullen and Solas happy as well. 

She sat up in bed, blinking at the brightness that seemed to flood her room, and she felt her heart sink. “Damn it!” she cursed when she saw the snow piled against the glass door to the balcony. She hurried across the room and peered outside, but she knew that any plans of a picnic would be ruined for the day. There was no way they were getting across the bridge now. 

A sense of defeat filled her and she huffed, cursing her luck. Maybe this really wasn’t supposed to happen. No, she told herself, she wasn’t going to give up that easily. She got dressed slowly, an idea forming in her mind, and by the time she headed downstairs to the Great Hall, she already found her solution. And she thought it was a rather damn good one.

* * *

 

Solas was uncertain what was to become of their plans for that day when he first saw the snow that morning. But he’d agreed to meet Evelyn and Cullen at noon, and so he now stood in the Great Hall, wondering if they would simply reschedule or if Evie would press the issue anyway. He almost sighed. Knowing her, she would insist on sitting outside in the damned snow to eat their meal. Though the idea amused him and he chuckled, trying to cover it with a cough when some of the others turned to look at him. He turned and took a sudden interest in the ceiling, wondering where his human companions might be.

Cullen was more than a bit wary as he made his way into the Great Hall, brushing the snowflakes from his mantle as he did so. The weather was terrible and he knew that Evie was going to be heartbroken at the ruined plans they had. Still, he had seen neither hide nor hair of any messengers for the past hour and he was wondering what exactly the Inquisitor might have cooked up instead. His anxiety only grew when he spotted Solas standing under one of the large draperies that hung from the high ceiling, possibly eavesdropping on some gossiping nobles nearby. He gathered up what courage he had and made his way over to the mage. “So… here we are.”

Solas turned at the sound of Cullen’s voice. “Here we are,” he echoed. There was an uncomfortable silence between them, and for the first time, Solas was unsure of what to say. He cleared his throat and looked around, trying to come up with some sort of conversation to ease the tension. “Unfortunate weather, considering our plans for the day,” he said. He nearly cringed. The weather? Did he really have nothing more interesting to speak of? He was about to open his mouth and try again when he caught sight of Evie bouncing into the Great Hall and a relieve sigh escaped him. “Inquisitor,” he greeted her.

She tipped her head, the slightest sign of exasperation in her features. “I told you to call me Evie. That doesn’t mean just in private,” she quietly scolded him. She was so happy to have a chance to steal them both away and have some quiet time that she thought she might burst. “I know our plans are sort of out of the question with the snowstorm,” she said, glaring towards the main doors as if the snow piling there had personally offended her. “But I think I’ve got a solution. Come with me,” she said and took each of them by the hand and led them towards her room.

Cullen blinked after her as he suddenly found himself pulled along and his eyes darted around the Great Hall as both he and Solas were led past everyone in the building. His ears burned and he could almost hear the gossiping building around them. Just lunch, it was just lunch, he repeated in his head.

Solas wasn’t sure what to expect. He was more distracted by Evelyn’s enthusiasm and he found himself smiling at that. Oh he shouldn’t have let himself get so swept up in this, in her. He knew that there were far more important things that he should be doing, there was always work to be done, and yet he longed for this. The companionship, the acceptance. It was a craving deep in his soul and he knew he couldn’t have refused her now if he’d tried.

His eyes widened when they reached the top of the stairs and he saw their “picnic” lunch spread out on a large quilt on her floor, with plush pelts of furs around it for them to lounge on. The fireplace roared as the snow fell outside. It was perhaps a bit more romantic than he’d expected, but he could tell that she’d put a great deal of effort into it. “Evie…”

She released their hands and turned to beam at them both. “See? Anything can work if you put your mind to it,” she insisted. She went over to the quilt and sat down, looking over the food she’d brought up from the kitchens. Roast chicken and winter vegetables, fresh bread, cheese, wine. “Come on, before it gets cold,” she insisted, wrinkling her nose slightly at Cullen. “Told ya I’d make sure you’re properly fed,” she teased.

Cullen blinked at the large spread she had set up in front of them. It was certainly more than the cold sandwich he had been expecting, with less bugs and anything else that came with a picnic. He swallowed and forced his legs to move before he sank down on the furs, the warmth of them sinking into his clothing and chasing away the chill of the day. She really had put a lot of thought and care into this meal. “That you did,” he said, giving her a small smile as he tried to make himself comfortable. He still wasn’t certain what to think of Solas now.

Evie could see that both men were a bit on edge, that they seemed uncertain of how things were supposed to go, and she couldn’t blame them. She herself wasn’t sure. But she was determined to make the best of it. She sat up a bit and cut into the chicken, fixing plates for each of them, then sat back and poured three glasses of wine. She took a sip, then giggled. “You should’ve seen the look on Sera’s face when I asked her to keep Leliana’s messengers busy this morning,” she said. “You’d have thought I just turned her loose in a candy shop. I didn’t even have to bribe her with the pie.”

Solas chewed slowly, trying to relax in this unusual circumstance. “I am certain I do not want to know how she accomplished that,” he said. He gratefully accepted the glass of wine from her and drank a healthy swallow down. He had to admit, at least the food was good. Though he found himself thinking he would’ve enjoyed it more had it been just himself and the Inquisitor. Sitting there with Cullen felt distinctly like there was a third wheel, though he wasn’t sure if it was him or the Commander. 

“No, you probably don’t,” Evie agreed, still snickering slightly. She looked up at Cullen again. “Just, you know, if Leliana asks about it, just play dumb.”

Cullen snorted into his own cup of wine as he drank deeply. More than he wanted to admit before he set the goblet down and began to eat. “I have a great respect for Leliana and I know that if she comes asking, she already knows the truth and just wants to watch me squirm before she takes her revenge,” he said, “So long as Sera doesn’t put another beehive in the training dummies again, I’ll be content.” 

“That was puzzling, how she managed to do that,” Solas commented while Evie laughed again. They’d all been fascinated to learn how she’d accomplished such a feat, especially when she said she couldn’t remember. 

“If you didn’t blush so much when confronted, maybe Leliana wouldn’t instantly know you’re guilty,” Evie said, quirking a playfully accusatory eyebrow at Cullen. “Like when you tried to use calibrating the trebuchets to get out of another interlude three weeks in a row. You aren’t fooling anyone with that one anymore, you know. You need better lies.” Her lips twitched in a smile as she took a bite of the chicken, giving a soft moan at the taste.

Speaking of blushing, his face went red at the noise that passed her lips and he swallowed hard. “Well, ah, yes. They do need to be calibrated regularly. I promised you back when we first made it to Skyhold that the enemy would not take us by surprise again. Since the trebuchets were instrumental in deterring Corypheus the first time, it only makes sense to keep them in top condition should the worst occur,” he recited. It sounded good to him and Josephine could hardly argue with that. He also cursed his luck; if the picnic got too awkward, he had been planning on using that to bail early.

“Mmhmm,” she hummed skeptically, but let the subject drop. He knew he was found out. She chewed and swallowed, taking in the blush on his face. Maker, how she loved that. “Speaking of blushing, you’re doing it again,” she teased, leaning over to touch his face, tracing the redness across his cheekbone.

Solas looked down at his plate, feeling himself bristle at the way she flirted with the Commander. He tried to remind himself that this was to be expected, that if they agreed to this unusual relationship that he couldn’t allow himself to feel this way. It would never work if there was any hint of jealousy or possessiveness. Yet he’d never been very good at sharing, and he was beginning to question this entire idea. He bit his tongue and took another drink of the wine, though it had little effect on him. 

Cullen couldn’t stop himself and he leaned into her fingers, letting their coolness sooth his heated cheek. “Yes, well. The whole situation is rather odd. To be honest, I’m still not entirely sure what we are hoping to achieve. I just want you to be happy. You deserve it. Solas as well. I’ve never been very good at handling relationships. That was just with one person. With two?” He sighed and looked down at his plate, as if he could crawl underneath it and hide. “Andraste preserve me, I have no idea what I am doing.” 

“Cullen,” she said softly, “We’re just having a meal together. Getting to know each other better. That’s all. You’re thinking too hard on this.” She felt her excitement waver a bit, but she was determined not to give up. She looked to the elf, who was looking down at his own plate, both of them looking rather uncomfortable. She chewed her lip for a moment, picking at her food. She wanted this to go well. “It’s new to all of us,” she admitted. 

“At least we’re on even footing,” Solas offered, feeling the awkwardness of it all as well. They ate their food quietly, all of them seeming unsure of what to say, until he set aside the empty plate and began to wonder if he could excuse himself to go back to the Rotunda and his books for a while. He’d hoped that, well, perhaps this would go better than he’d anticipated, but now it was just uncomfortable. He was about to thank her for the food when she got up and went to her desk, retrieving a box, and returned to their quilt. “And what do you have there?” he asked, his interest piqued.

“Oh nothing,” she said as she opened it. “Just a few of those frilly little cakes from Val Royeaux.” A smirk touched her lips as she saw his eyebrow raise and she picked one up, leaning over to offer him a bite. “You know you can’t resist these. You’ve said it before.”

“And so you have discovered one of my weaknesses,” he chuckled, leaning forward to let her feed it to him, his lips brushing her fingertips. The sweet flavor of the little cake burst over his tongue and he couldn’t stop himself from smiling, his eyes locked with hers. It pleased him to see the slight blush that now spread across her cheeks.

Cullen watched, his heart beating fast as his eyes followed her delicate fingers as she offered the cake to Solas. He felt a flash of jealousy as he watched the elf’s lips close around the treat, catching one of her fingers in the process and he rubbed at his face. Maker, he wasn’t certain what he was doing. He sat there for a moment, watching them carefully as he tried to sort through his feelings. Maybe it could just be about her, but Solas wasn’t going anywhere and he couldn’t just pretend that the other man wasn’t a part of this.

Evie grinned as tingles raced up and down her arm from the smooth contact of Solas’ lips. There was an intensity in his eyes that captivated her, and she felt a heat settle low in her belly as they locked gazes. The room suddenly felt rather hot. She knew it was too soon to even approach the idea, but her mind wandered for just a moment, imagining him kissing her lips, laying her back on the quilt beneath them, and ravaging her all day long while the storm raged outside. And in her mind, there was Cullen with her too, giving her just as much attention as Solas. She imagined having one, then the other, then all three of them tangled up together on the floor, giving in to their desires until they were all spent and sated. 

She suddenly shivered and blinked, snapping herself away from the daydream, though she could feel the heat burning all over her face and between her legs. She licked her lips and looked down at the box of cakes, finding it almost hard to breathe. She picked up another cake and looked to Cullen, offering him a shaky little smile. “Would you like one too?” she asked, holding it out for him.

Cullen swallowed, seeing the uncertainty in her eyes. She wanted so much for this thing between them to work. It went against everything that he had been brought up to believe. The look in her eyes was kind and wonderful, though, and he found himself nodding and leaning forward, biting down on the sweet treat with a soft groan of appreciation.

The stubble of his chin scraped against her fingers and she lost herself in that daydream again, wondering what it would feel like against her breasts, the insides of her thighs… Oh she was getting ahead of herself. She giggled and brushed a crumb from Cullen’s lip with her thumb, pausing for a moment to carefully trace the scar there, wondering at it, how he’d come by it. She forced herself to pull her hand away and she grabbed up one of the cakes for herself, popping it in her own mouth in the hopes that it would somehow relieve the tension she felt growing in her.

Solas felt a tension growing as well, though it was decidedly different than what Evie felt, despite the fact that they were imagining much the same things. Watching her feed a tiny cake to Cullen after she had just done the same thing for him was like a reality slap to the face. If it came to that point, could he really do it? To have his way with her while Cullen watched on, then to pass her over to him and have to watch in return? He didn’t know if he could.

He tried to think back to memories of the Fade, to recall if he’d ever witnessed such a dynamic. There were times he’d inadvertently stumbled upon a threesome, though such memories usually only captured what most would consider “the juicy bits” and he never paid them much attention. And most such occurrences involved excessive amounts of alcohol, and one man with two women. No, there was nothing there that would help him in this situation now. 

Evie tilted her head. “Solas?” she asked, blinking when he gave a slight jump and looked at her. “Are you alright? You seem… not happy.”

He nearly sighed at the disappointment he could see in her eyes. “I am fine,” he lied smoothly. “Merely lost in thought.” At least that part wasn’t a lie. He didn’t know if he should try to capture more of Evie’s attention for himself, or if he should just walk away now and forget this whole mess. His eyes flicked to Cullen, wondering if he was warming up to this idea or if he was struggling just as much with all the implications of this kind of a relationship.

Solas’ answer seemed to satisfy Evie and she smiled again. To be fair, she was used to him being like that, lost in his own thoughts and ponderings, so it didn’t seem unusual that he would do so now. 

She set the box down on the quilt and stretched her arms over her head, then laid back, propping herself up on her elbows. “This is the kind of weather that makes you just want to curl up in front of the fireplace all day, isn’t it?” she said, glancing over at the blazing fire as she bit her lower lip. She was toying with the idea of asking them to lay with her and just soak up the heat from the fire for a bit, but she knew they wouldn’t go for that. Not at this point. Still, that didn’t stop her from thinking about it, from wanting it. 

Cullen watched her, his eyes drifting over her as she laid back, making herself comfortable. His eyes flickered over to Solas and he could practically feel the tension in the air between them. Oh he was a fool to even think that this could work. “Evie, forgive me, but I feel like I need to say something. I don’t mean to offend you, it’s been a long, long while since someone has tried so hard on my behalf, but I’m not certain if I can do this. I’m just not… attracted to Solas this way and thinking about it only makes it worse. I’m not certain if I can share you.”

“What?” she gasped, sitting up suddenly. “But… But I thought this was going well,” she said, tipping her head slightly, confusion and a bit of hurt in her expression. She blinked at him, her heart thudding painfully in her chest, feeling a bit blindsided by his statement. “I’m not asking you to be attracted to him, just that, you know, the three of us could…” She trailed off and pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration. Even she didn’t know exactly what she expected of them.

“I’m afraid I have to agree with Cullen,” Solas said. He was grateful the Commander decided to speak up. “We agreed to give this a try, but I am not certain that this can work. To be honest, I was not expecting such an intimate setting for our meal,” he confessed, feeling as though that were half the problem in and of itself. It was a rather romantic set up, and while she probably hadn’t intended it to be that way, that didn’t change it. 

“Intimate?” she echoed, dropping her hand and giving him a disbelieving look. “It’s a meal sitting on the floor. I thought this would be even less romantic than an actual picnic outside somewhere.” She caught Solas’ pointed glance at the fireplace. “Well it’s bloody cold! It’s not like I lit it for the sake of ambiance!” She huffed again and looked down at the quilt. “This was just supposed to be the three of us spending time together like friends more than anything. And now you’re acting like I’m asking you to get naked and roll around together or something.” She crossed her arms over her chest, feeling rather sour, and didn’t look at either of them.

Cullen pressed his lips together, feeling terrible knowing he was the one who put that look on her face. He yearned to take it away, but he wasn’t certain what the cost would be to do so. “Snow outside, fur blankets in front of a warm fire. Hand feeding us little cakes? It’s almost something from Varric’s romance novel. It’s nice, don’t get me wrong, but it’s a little uncomfortable considering yesterday we just decided to try this out.” He swallowed harshly and rubbed at the back of his neck. The imagery of the three of them rolling around naked in her bed hit him hard and he shook himself. “And as for that… part… wouldn’t we be working towards that?”  

“Well I sort of thought we could take some time to warm up to it,” she said a little bitterly. She gave a mirthless snort and shook her head. “One of Varric’s romance novels? So you’re saying this,” she paused and gestured at the now empty plates set out on the quilt in front of them, “was cheesy and cliche? I don’t know if you’ve ever attempted to read one of Varric’s romances, but that’s exactly what they are.”

“Perhaps,” Solas interrupted, his voice firm and just a little loud, “We should all take some more time to think about what it is we truly want.” He could see that she was getting more upset by the moment, and he understood why. She’d put a great deal of effort into this meal only to have it blow up in her face. Anyone would’ve been upset. “We put you on the spot yesterday, Evie. And you only had a few hours to consider your options. And I think Cullen and I both agreed a little too quickly without taking time to consider how we truly feel about this arrangement.” He shared a look with the Commander before he continued. “I fear it is a bit too much too soon.”

Evie bit her lips to keep herself from snapping again, and gave a curt nod. Her mind was reeling; where had she gone wrong? She didn’t know and it hurt to think that she had messed up so badly right out the gate. Maybe she did need more time to think about it all. “Okay,” she said, her voice resigned and she moved to start gathering up the dishes to take back to the kitchens.

Solas hated the way she looked, so defeated and confused. This was not what he’d intended. “Evie, let us help you,” he said, moving to pick up the dishes as well, but paused when she grabbed his wrist, tighter than he expected her to.

“No. Let me do it. I have nothing better to do now anyway,” she said and immediately felt bad for the venom in her voice. “You said you needed space, time to think. So take it.”

“Evelyn…”

“Leave me.”

Solas stood up, sighing through his nose, knowing better than to argue with a woman when she was in such a mood. Things could only go downhill from here. He exchanged another look with Cullen and tilted his head slightly towards the door, indicating that they should go.

Cullen nodded and sadly followed the elf out of the Inquisitor’s quarters. It wasn’t how he had wanted to make her feel, but something had to be said for it. He felt a breath of relief wash over him as they made their way downstairs. “You don’t think I was too harsh, do you? I felt that something had to be said. I’m not certain what it is this could become. I’m not sure if I could accept it.”

“You were a bit blunt,” Solas said as they walked. “But harsh? No, I do not think so. You were uncomfortable and you voiced it. If it is unacceptable for any of us to speak our minds freely, then we have already wasted our time here.” He glanced over his shoulder as they walked through the door and into the Great Hall. “Though I do feel bad for Evelyn. I could see she was trying, even if things did not work the way she had hoped.” He nearly snorted at himself. “In all honesty, I do not know what it is I had hoped for.”

Cullen chuckled at that as well. “If we are being honest, then neither did I. I’m not certain what it was I thought would happen.” He felt a blush crawl across his cheeks and shook his head. “We weren’t thinking about her, were we? We were being selfish. Maker preserve me, all I was worried about was you. Thinking of being alone in bed with her and you there watching. It made me uncomfortable, jealous. If we were truly looking for a relationship with her, it should be more than physical…”

Solas felt his ears go hot, knowing that the Commander had been thinking the same things that he himself had. And he was embarrassed for it. He stared straight ahead as they walked, perhaps a little slower than was necessary as they made their way towards the Rotunda. “Strange, isn’t it?” he commented. “We both care so much for her, this meal together was supposed to be about spending time uninterrupted with her, and all we could focus on was each other.” He shook his head. “It is our fault, not hers. Our own preoccupations with what may never even come, preventing us from what is happening now. We may not have given this, and her, a fair try.”

Cullen ducked his head, as if he were a child or something of the sort, not giving his full attention to the cause. He had always prided himself on committing to something even when the odds were stacked against him. He rubbed at his face. “I need some time to think on this.  I mean, to go from nothing at all to expecting to fear the worst. I mean… we haven’t even touched, as friends let alone as l… well, you know it.”

Solas chuckled as they reached the Rotunda. “You are worrying far too much about things that may not even come to pass. Though I admit, I am guilty of it myself. My thoughts during our lunch mirrored your own,” he said. He paused and turned towards Cullen, reaching out and placing his hand on the side of the other man’s neck, giving him a comforting squeeze. “Do not look so far ahead that you lose sight of what is before you now, my friend. We may yet find a way that agrees with all of us.”

Cullen felt his breath catch as the other man rested hands on either side of his neck. They were warm, calloused and he suddenly found his heart fluttering, his stomach twisting at the thought of this mage holding him so carefully. He was so conflicted at the simple touch and he found himself at a loss for simple words as he looked to the other man, the sharp blue eyes penetrating his own so deeply. “Right… ah… I will give it some thought.”

Solas would’ve laughed, had it not been such a serious moment. He could see the struggle going on behind Cullen’s eyes. “Do that,” he said in a soft, yet intense voice. “And I will as well. There is a solution to this. We just have to figure out what it is.” He pulled back then, considering his own feelings. Besides the occasional handshake, he realized Cullen was right. That was the first physical contact they’d had. It puzzled him now. It didn’t change the way he felt about the other man, for good or ill. There was an intimacy to the gesture, and yet he felt unaffected by it. Perhaps this was a good sign. Perhaps there was still a way to make this work.


	6. Chapter 6

“Just take both of them to bed with you,” Evelyn said, trying to mock Dorian’s voice and accent as she tromped along the battlements that evening, her arms wrapped around her against the cold. She’d avoided everyone for the rest of the day, thinking over every minute detail of her interactions with both Solas and Cullen, and the advice she’d sought out from her inner circle. And now it seemed she’d followed the worst advice given to her - by Dorian.

She let her feet carry her towards his room, thinking of giving him a good tongue-lashing to relieve some of the misery she felt. “You!” she snapped when she threw open the door to his room with a loud bang, not even bothering to knock first. She froze in the doorway when she saw the Tevinter lounging on his bed, reading a book, the way he jumped at her intrusion. And her anger vanished. “You… I… Dorian, I fucked up,” she gasped out, wrapping her arms around herself again, though not because she was cold this time.

Dorian started, looking up from his book and pulled the covers up over his bare chest. “By the Maker woman, shut the door behind you. There’s a snow storm if you haven’t noticed!” he cried out before he turned to the tray of little slices of bread covered with cheese and tart bits of fruit, picking one up to pop into his mouth. He chased it with a warm gulp of brandy that made his skin tingle in the most pleasant way. “Ah… there we are. Now, come over here. What exactly have you fucked up?”

She closed the door quickly and moved to stand next to his bed, shifting from foot to foot, trying to form a coherent sentence in her mind before she spoke. “I took your advice,” she finally blurted out. “About taking them both to bed? Cullen. And Solas, I mean. Well, not to bed. We didn’t get that far. I mean, they sat on my bed last night while we talked, but then today we had lunch, and it all fell apart and I don’t know what I did wrong. And everything’s just a big mess now.” She was breathless by the time she stopped rambling and she turned and sat herself heavily on the edge of Dorian’s bed. “It’s just a big mess.”

Dorian marked the page in his book and closed it with a definite  _ thump.  _ “Oh my dear dear friend,” he murmured as he lifted up the edge of the blanket and gestured for her to climb in next to him. “Don’t tell me that you invited both of them to bed at once? After one meeting?” He groaned inwardly and scolded himself. He knew he should have been more specific on the matter.

Evie moved to crawl under the blanket and curled up next to Dorian’s warm side, kicking off her boots in the process. “Not to bed. Just lunch. I just wanted to spend time with both of them,” she answered quietly, feeling safe and warm under the blankets with him. “We were going to go on a picnic. But then fucking snowpocalypse happened,” she said bitterly, gesturing towards the outside, “and it ruined our plans. So I threw a quilt on the floor in my room and we had a picnic there. And the next thing I know, they’re both saying that they’re uncomfortable and that this isn’t going to work.”

The mage raised his eyebrows at the woman and nearly winced himself. “Let me see if I have this straight. You invited both men to a luncheon slash dinner date only to be snowed in. Then you had a picnic lunch on the warm furs of your cold floor?” He imagined the situation and almost wished that he had been present for the event. It was clear to him why it had been so uncomfortable. “My dear, if a man invited you to a lunch or dinner and you found out last minute that it was by firelight, candlelight, whatever kind of light, what would you be thinking? Yes. Even if that man had pure intentions.” 

She groaned and buried her face into his shoulder. “Well how else was I supposed to keep my room warm? I couldn’t just put out the fire. I’d freeze! This is so ridiculous,” she huffed, turning to lay more on her back and stared up at the ceiling, though she kept her head on his shoulder. “So, what, if the fireplace had been out, it wouldn’t have been such an ‘intimate setting’?” she asked, drawing quotations in the air with her fingers and lowering her voice to mimic Solas’. “I declare bullshit on that. Not gonna freeze my tits off just to sit on the floor and eat chicken.” She crossed her arms over her chest and pouted. “Cullen said it was like something from one of Varric’s cheesy romance novels.”

“Cheesy?” Dorian scoffed, “My dear, if you have read them, or even listened to Cassandra go on about them, they are far from cheesy.  Over the top, smutty and leaving you wanting is more like it. They are hardly cheesy. Cheesy are the books with buxom women who tease the men and tell all of the sordid details.  Still, I couldn’t finish the book Cassandra lent me last, lacked any and all kind of intellectual thoughts. That and it wasn’t my cup of tea. I’m rather looking forward to the next book Varric will write, so long as he doesn’t call me a magister.”

“You know he’s going to call you a magister, just to annoy you,” she said and sighed. “I tried to read one of Varric’s books, but I never had the time to really get into it. Maybe I should try again… That isn’t the point! The point is, Cullen thought the lunch I set up was bad-romance-novel worthy! And I think Solas agreed with him.” She clapped her hands to her face and whined. “I have no idea what I’m doing. This has screwed everything up. I should have just picked one and gone for it. It’s like… I got greedy and now I’m being punished.”

Dorian sighed and set his book to the side before he turned towards Evelyn. “Be honest with me, my dear,” he said and tucked his arm under his head, “What exactly did you think would happen? That they would be overjoyed at the prospect at being able to be with you without having to worry about the other?”

Evie sighed and thought about it for a moment. “I thought that we could spend some time together. That, you know, maybe they could not see each other as competition? I just wanted to eat and talk, get them to see each other as friends more than just another member of the Inquisition, I guess,” she said. “And, well,” she paused and blushed, “and to flirt with them a little. I wasn’t going for ground-breaking here, I just wanted a nice meal with the two of them.” She turned on her side and looked at him. “Was that really expecting too much?”

“Considering that you just asked the straight and narrow Commander the day before, and I am assuming that Solas has been celibate for the longest time, perhaps. What you perhaps don’t realize is that the men worth keeping, like myself, are quite jealous. If we find someone we want to be with, spend time with and get to know, we don’t want any competition. Like if the lummox invited one or more of the serving girls to just have lunch with us, I would be exceedingly uncomfortable.” He sighed and rubbed her shoulder. “Am I making any sort of sense to you, my dear?”

“Yes,” she answered softly, sighing and plucking at a loose thread on his blanket. “This is all my fault. I thought it was going to be all happy and easy and it’s not. Like everything was going to be all rainbows and pink ponies or some shit. I wish I had more experience with handling just one man in a real relationship. But no, I have to jump right in and try to figure out how to make it work with two.” She pressed the heel of her hand to her forehead, feeling a headache coming on. “I’m so stupid.”

“Hush now,” he said, flicking the end of her nose with his finger, “None of that. You were ambitious and that should never be punished.” Dorian threaded his fingers through her hair and looked up towards the ceiling as well. “You’ve told me before that you’ve lived most of your life in the Circle, yes? Where your experiences with men would have been quick trysts in a darkened corner with no thought nor care as to who all was involved? Here this behaves a little bit differently and I have a feeling that our dear Commander might be looking towards the long term relationship rather than a quickie in the corner. So, of course he would be thinking about stripping down and getting naked with you and Solas and it most likely didn’t work to his advantage.”

Evie was lost for a moment as the mental image of Cullen and Solas naked danced in her head. She drew a sharp breath and tried to push it from her mind. “Yeah, that’s pretty much how it was at the Circle. Broom closets or that little blind spot in the library if you were really quick about it,” she said, her voice rather flat. “It wasn’t good.” She tried not to think about her time in the Circle if she could avoid it, especially those sorts of encounters. “I get it. I do. Cullen’s straight. Solas is straight. They don’t see each other like that. But I thought maybe they could, I don’t know, somehow just stomach being around each other like that? I’m not asking them to sleep with each other! I’m asking too much,” she muttered, feeling defeated. “How do I fix this, Dorian? Do I just suck it up and pick one and be done with it? Lose whatever I have with the other altogether?” But the thought made her heart ache even as she asked the question.

Dorian chuckled and tilted his head at her as he turned her face to look at him. “My dear. Relax. You are trying far too hard,” he said, his eyes flickering to his bedside table and wondered briefly if he should pour her a glass. She seemed like she needed it. “You’ve introduced the idea to them and the best things, the ones worth fighting for, take time. So let them sort it out between themselves and see where that leads you. You’ve made the first move, now you wait and see who fights for you.”

She didn’t like that idea much. “So what? Sit around and wait for them to do something? I’ll die a lonely old hag here in Skyhold, locked up in my room with a bunch of cats before they figure this out for themselves,” she muttered. She paused and wrinkled her nose. “And I don’t even like cats.” It felt hopeless in that moment and all she wanted to do was to curl up and sleep so she could ignore the awful feeling in her chest, if only for a few hours. She wrapped an arm around Dorian’s middle and hugged herself tightly to his side. “I don’t want to give up,” she said meekly, her words slightly muffled with the way her face was buried into the blanket covering his chest. “You really think just waiting around for them to make a move is going to work?”

“Yes. Silly thing,” he murmured against her head before he shifted around, tucking his other arm behind his head as he used the other one to hug her to him. “Considering that they are not dead from the waist down, one or both will come calling on you soon enough. If they are to both be with you, then they will need to work whatever it is between them out first before they come back to you. So breathe, my dear friend, all will be well in the end.”

She was sorely tempted to argue with him, to go and talk to Cullen and Solas, to try and smooth everything over. But then again, Dorian had more experience with these matters than she did. She peered up at the Tevinter, narrowing her eyes slightly. “The last time I took your advice, I ended up in this mess,” she accused, though there was a slight playfulness in it. She huffed when he merely smiled at her. “Alright. I’ll just… keep to myself for a while. See what happens.” She snuggled into him, feeling exhausted. “Can I stay with you tonight? Or are you supposed to go meet with Bull? Maker knows I don’t want to screw up any other relationships today.”

Dorian laughed at that. “I seriously doubt you could screw up this relationship, my dear. It would be my luck that Bull would invite you to join in,” he said dryly before he turned his head and lifted his hand from behind himself to gesture at the fire, dimming the blaze down to something more conducive to sleep. “I have a sleeping draught if you think you will have trouble?”

She shook her head, letting her eyes fall closed. “No. I’m so worn out, I think I could sleep for days,” she murmured, a long, sleepy sigh escaping from her. “Thanks, Dorian. You’re the best friend in the whole world,” she yawned, relaxing more into his side as sleep pulled at her and she didn’t think she could’ve gotten out of his bed in that moment if her life depended on it.

He smiled, relaxing back into his bed as he felt her relax at his side. A strong, protective surge tugged at his heart and he vowed that he wouldn’t let anyone hurt her. “As are you, Evelyn,” he murmured quietly and tugged the blankets up around her shoulders more securely, “Sleep now. Things will be better in the morning.”


	7. Chapter 7

Solas neatly stacked the papers on his desk, looking it over to make sure there wasn’t something he was forgetting. It was almost strange to see his desk so bare, he normally had it piled with books and papers, maps, but he’d learned better than to leave them out while he was away. He changed a glance at the railing above, but there was no sign of Dorian. More than once he had returned from a mission to find the Tevinter had “borrowed” a book. One that was usually never returned without a great deal of headache.

He set aside the last stack of the papers, satisfied that he had everything he needed, when he heard the door to the Rotunda close and he looked up to see Cullen. “Commander,” he greeted the other man, a bit stiffly. The two hadn’t spoken much since their lunch with Evie several days ago. Come to think of it, he hadn’t seen much of her either. “What can I do for you?”

“Ah, Solas.” He paused, looking around at the sparsity of the otherwise cluttered desk. “Are you going somewhere?” he asked as he looked back to the elf, his own hands fiddling with the report from Crestwood that Solas had requested a copy of when it was ready. “I was not aware that the Inquisitor was preparing an outing.” Cullen still felt rather flustered over what had transpired between them and any attempt to talk with the woman, she was busy with Dorian or gave some other reason that seemed almost silly to him. 

“She isn’t, at least that I’m aware of,” Solas answered. “I have a small errand to run. I have heard of a merchant at the crossroads that has a book I am interested in. It is rather rare to find a copy of this particular text, and I would rather inspect the book myself before buying it instead of having it shipped here. It won’t take me long.” He paused, debating if he should elaborate, then decided it couldn’t hurt. “I believe getting out for the day may help to clear my mind as well.”

Cullen blinked at the man, slightly curious as to what sort of book it was that would have him leave to inspect it before buying it. It rather spoke to the quality that Solas expected and he briefly wondered if he was expecting to get swindled. He remembered the ruined date and that he had an opportunity here. “Would you mind some company? It would be good to get out and grab some fresh air. Save me from a few reports and,” he shuddered, “letters from interested parties that Leliana refuses to let me burn.”

Solas eyed the Commander for a moment, surprised that he would want to come along on this trip. Was this is effort at making an attempt to work things out with Evelyn? Or was Leliana really hounding him that much? Either way, he didn’t see a problem with Cullen joining him. “It won’t be a very exciting trip, I’m afraid,” Solas said with a slight chuckle. “But if you can manage to get away, I would be glad for your company. Shall we go now? Before the messengers find you again, that is.”

Cullen found himself nodding before he could even really think about it. He set the report down on Solas’s desk before he gestured towards the door. “Shall we? I’ll leave word with Cassandra that I will be unavailable for a little while. Should keep her amused with the new recruits, I’m certain,” he muttered more to himself than the other. “I’ve been thinking a lot about the other night. A trip to learn some more about each other would not be amiss?”

Solas was silent for a moment as they walked through the Great Hall and outside, heading towards Cassandra. “Is there still a point?” he finally asked. “I fear we may have put Evelyn off the idea altogether. I don’t know about you, but she has had little time for me ever since. It would seem she is keeping herself busier than usual as of late.” He glanced at Cullen before continuing. “Still, as I said before, I would be glad for your company today. Whatever happens, I do not see time spent with a friend as time wasted.”

Cullen found himself smiling at that and couldn’t remember the last time he had taken time out of his day to spend it with a friend, the precious few that he had. “I’d like that. I am almost embarrassed to say when the last time it was that I had an outing with someone, let alone a friend. I have precious few. Truly.” He rubbed at the back of his neck, a blush on his face as he could probably count his friends, true friends, on one hand. It was a sad state.

“As do I. It is easy to bury ourselves in work in times such as these, but we should still remember to value those relationships that are important to us, and to cultivate new ones. One can never have too many friends,” he said, giving a nod to Cassandra as they neared her. She was, as always, hard at work with her training dummies, but she stopped to talk to Cullen. Solas stood back and waited for them to speak before he turned to head to the stables. “I think she almost seemed happy to take over the training for you today,” he commented. “She can expend her energy hitting moving targets today instead. Must be a nice change of pace for her.”

Cullen chuckled as they headed towards the stables. “Anything to help her use her energy in a creative way, rather than have her constantly threatening Varric or others who would antagonize her. I swear, that dwarf is just looking for trouble with that one,” he muttered and nodded at the stable hands who hurried about and saddled two horses. “Maker knows training the recruits for her is almost as good as having the day off.”

“Probably better, if you ask her,” Solas said, giving a nod as he was handed the reins of a horse and he mounted it smoothly, then urged it to walk out of the stables and towards the bridge. Though there was still snow on the ground, the bridge had been cleared, making it passable again. “She is good at what she does, though I think she would not know what to do with herself if she did not have her work. Much like you.”

Cullen chuckled, following after Solas, letting their horses walk side by side. “I’m sure she would agree. It is not that I don’t enjoy other aspects of life, it’s...” He trailed off and lifted his face to the sky, thinking it over carefully, “It’s all that I know. All that I have been raised to know. I was taught that in the middle of a war, it was dangerous to let your thoughts wander and get carried away. Mistakes are made then and the cost for those mistakes is too high. When I first joined the Templar order, I swore that if I committed to it, I would be the best Templar that I could be. No time for silly things or play.”

“You may have been a Templar for most of your life, and in many ways still are, but that is not all that you are,” Solas said. “Your dedication to your work is admirable, but you must remember to take time for yourself. You cannot give your all to the cause if you do not take care of yourself. And that involves more than food and sleep.” He looked ahead as they rode, thinking about how easy it was to fall into conversation with Cullen when there was no pressure on them. “I know that is easier said than done with everything the Inquisition demands. But no one would see you as shirking your duties if you were to take a moment to yourself now and again.” A smile touched his lips as he looked over at the other man. “Just as you are doing now.”

Cullen laughed at that. “Sometimes I wonder. It’s easy to think that the Inquisition would crumble if I wasn’t looking after it all the time. I can’t tell you how many things I have seen crumble just because someone went a bit lax and the wrong people were placed in charge. Sure, they may have seemed like strong, good choices at the moment, but time reveals all,” he said sadly, thinking over his time in Kinloch and in Kirkwall. “If I knew then what I know now.” 

Now that was a sentiment Solas knew all too well. And he was still trying to correct the mistakes he had made over a thousand years ago. He didn’t like the look on Cullen’s face, the tone of his voice, but he didn’t know if he was really qualified to give advice on this. It rather made him feel a bit of a hypocrite. Still, he had to say something. He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it, thinking over his words carefully before he spoke. “The past cannot be undone, unfortunately,” he said, his tone solemn. “But we can always learn from our mistakes. Whatever your past holds, I can see that you are doing all you can to be a better man, to do what is right. And that is all anyone can ask of you.”

Cullen looked over to Solas, surprised at how close to home the words hit. He thought over his words carefully. “Sometimes, that’s all you can do. To hold on and hope for the best even when the world you love is crumbling around you.” He closed his eyes and suppressed a shudder. “Even when yourself is turning into something you aren’t certain you want the world to witness. It’s not easy. Even more so when all you have is yourself to confide in.” 

A sharpness panged in Solas’ heart. “Your words are truer than you know, Cullen,” he said. He wondered what would make the Commander say such things, what could have been lurking in his past. He himself knew all too well what it was like to see the world he loved gone, changed forever. And it was by his own hand. A knot formed in his throat and he had to swallow very hard to rid himself of it. “You and I are more alike than we might have realized,” he said. “The things you speak of, I understand all too well.”

The Commander was surprised to hear this and studied the elf for a moment. “I am sorry to hear that. What I’ve been through…” He trailed off, feeling apprehensive talking about it all. “It is not something I would bring up in polite conversation. Not on an outing between friends. Perhaps someday.” He felt a guilt in his chest, he knew he would never bring it up unless he had to. He thought about the lyrium he had stopped taking, how some days all he wanted was one more sip to dull the pain, to quiet his dreams. It was agony.

“I can respect that,” Solas said, though now his curiosity was more piqued than ever. He could see the struggle going on in Cullen. How he wanted to share, and yet didn’t at the same time. How many times had Solas felt the same? How many times had he come close to sharing it with Evie, only to stop himself at the last moment. It was a horrible position to be in, to feel that you had to hide part of yourself away for fear of losing the few good people you held close. “When… If you ever feel comfortable enough to share, I would listen. I may not be able to help, but sometimes just being able to share is enough. And I would do that for you.”

Cullen offered a small smile to the other man. “I would like that,” he said honestly as he pushed the darker thoughts out of his mind and focused on the trip ahead of them. “Honestly, I would. It is more than I can say anyone has offered to me in a long while. Thank you. And… should you ever need someone to listen, my door is always open. As you well know.”

Solas inclined his head. “I appreciate that,” he said sincerely, though he felt he would never confide his secrets to the Commander, or anyone else for that matter.

The conversation turned lighter as they rode to the crossroads, casually discussing whatever topics they liked, everything except that awful luncheon. Solas hadn’t expected them to have so much to talk about, but he found he was rather enjoying Cullen’s company. And it was nice to speak to him outside of Skyhold, away from their duties and responsibilities there. It was exactly what he had hoped for. 

They were half-way through a mental game of chess when they finally reached the crossroads. “Shall we continue our game on the return trip?” Solas asked as they dismounted the horses. He was glad to be out of the saddle and stretched his arms high over his head, flexing the sore muscles in his legs as he did so. 

Cullen laughed, almost snorting as he dismounted. “Of course, as if I would want to interrupt your winning streak, but could you at least pretend to have some trouble now and then? I’d like to have some sort of hope… and dignity,” he teased as he tied off the horses to the fence just outside of the inn. 

Solas clasped his hands behind his back and tilted his chin slightly into the air, a smirk on his lips. “Nope,” he answered, fighting the urge to chuckle at the way Cullen’s shoulders fell ever so slightly. He led the way to the merchant he’d heard had the particular book he was looking for. “Don’t look so disappointed, Commander. If I were easy on you, your game would not improve.” He came to a stop and greeted the merchant, asking if he could look at the book in question. A light touched his eyes when the man placed the heavy, leather-bound book in his fingers and with a careful ease, he opened it, his long fingers running down the page.

Cullen watched as Solas grew quiet, the way he held the book so carefully as if it were made of glass. His eyes caught on the elf’s long fingers as they caressed the worn pages almost lovingly and it made his breath catch. His lips moved like a whisper as they read over a few of the passages and he could see the light in his eyes, the admiration he had for something that had been well made. He chuckled, “I take it the book meets with your approval?”

Solas nodded without looking up from the book. He was more than pleased to find that it was an authentic copy. He carefully closed it, relishing in the slight crackle of the pages, and paid the merchant for it without haggling. It was well worth the price. He tucked it under his arm and turned to Cullen, a smile on his face. “I’m glad I decided to come and pick it up myself,” he said. “Shall we get ourselves a bite to eat before we head back?”

The Commander eagerly nodded, his own stomach growling loudly at the thought of having a hot meal for the undoubtedly cold trip back. “Best idea I have heard in awhile,” he said before he motioned towards the inn, “Have you ever been to Honnleath? It’s my home town. The inn there serves up the best ram steaks I have ever come across. Sauted up with some onions and wild mushrooms that only grow in that area. Maker, what I wouldn’t give for another bite.”

Solas chuckled as his stomach growled. “That does sound good,” he said as he led the way back towards the inn. “Let’s see how the steak here compares, shall we?” He was happy to step into the warmth of the inn, the tips of his ears stinging with the sudden change of temperature. They sat at a table near the middle and were promptly brought large tankards of warm spiced wine. “I have never personally been to Honnleath, but I have seen bits of memories of it in the Fade.” He carefully set his new book in his lap and scooted closer to the table, keeping it safe before he looked across the table to Cullen. “I can see why you would recall it with such fond memories.” He could see a spark of something in Cullen’s eyes at the mention of his hometown, and it was slightly endearing.

Cullen chuckled and nodded. “Well, good food is always remembered fondly. Especially when shared with the best of people.” He laughed, “Not certain if my siblings were the best of people, but they were something. It was always a big affair for my sister. She’d always insist on having a meal together at least once a week. Had to have your hair combed, pants scrubbed. The works. But it was worth it. Reminded me of what is really important.” He drifted off, a frown flashing across his face. “It’s all too easily forgotten, being out here in the middle of war.” 

“Not forgotten. Just not thought of as often when there are more pressing matters to attend to,” Solas said as he took a deep drink from the mug before him, licking his lips as he pulled it away. The heated liquid seemed to warm him from the inside out. “Too bad we do not have this to keep us warm on the return journey.” A rare, teasing smile split his lips. “You create a distraction and I will sneak it out when we prepare to leave,” he joked in a hushed tone.

Cullen couldn’t stop the smirk that appeared on his lips at Solas’s suggestion. “Now wouldn’t that be something? The Commander of the Inquisition and it’s foremost expert on the Fade apprehended for stealing spiced wine? Dorian would never let us hear the end of it,” he mused and took a sip of his own mug and his eyes widened at the brilliant burst of flavor that spread across his tongue, “Although, this might be worth the risk.”

“Dorian would only complain that we did not bring any back for him,” Solas chuckled. He sat back in his chair as the barmaid brought over two large plates with the ram steaks they had ordered. The warm savory scent curled up around his face and his mouth watered. Without hesitating, he cut into it and popped a bite in his mouth, his jaw clenching at the delicious taste. “Excellent suggestion, Cullen,” he said. He almost mentioned Evie, how she would’ve liked this, but it reminded him of how poorly their last lunch had gone, and he decided against it.

He smiled at Solas and cut into his own steak, loving the deep red color of the nearly rare steak before he took a bite and savored it. “Mmm, it’s so very close to the one from my home town,” he said and cut another bite, swirling it into the sauce that was smeared across the plate. “If there is one thing I know, it’s a good steak and this is up there. The Crossroads have done well since we’ve helped them at the beginning of all this. One might consider this the fruits of our labor.”

“An excellent way to look at it,” Solas agreed with a nod. He took several more bites before he spoke again. It was just that damned good. “Many places have been improved by the efforts of the Inquisition. Our organization has done more for the common people than any other. It is small things like this that let us know that our time is not wasted, that we are making a difference.”

A gust of cold air blew in as more patrons entered the inn. A man called a loud greeting to the barkeeper, then tromped across the wooden floor to plunk himself into a chair, joining the others who were already sitting there. “Cold enough out there to freeze yer balls off,” he grumbled as he shrugged off his cloak and draped it over the back of his chair. His eyes landed on Solas and he gave an exaggerated roll of his eyes as he turned back to face his friends. “Another fucking knife ear,” he muttered, but loud enough that it was heard by many. “Don’t we have enough of them runnin’ around as it is?”

Cullen froze a bite halfway to his lips as he heard the insult. It made his mouth go dry and he felt his jaw twitch in anger before he looked over to the man, sizing him up before he pushed away from the table. “You there, I would watch your tongue. Bigots like you are half of the reason we have problems in this world. You think he is lesser than you? You have another think coming, or you would if your brain wouldn’t melt from the consideration.”

The man turned in his seat to look at Cullen, draping one elbow over the back of his chair. He gave the Commander a sweeping look as if to size him up in return, and a dry snort of amusement escaped him. “Don’t think I was talkin’ to you, boy,” he said. He waved his hand dismissively as if Cullen was nothing more than an annoyance to him. “You go on back to your chair now, enjoy your meal with your little knife-ear friend over there,” he said and turned back to his friends, shaking his head and chuckling.

“Cullen,” Solas said, standing up from his chair, seeing the look of anger on the other man’s face. It surprised him that Cullen would defend him so readily, and an appreciative warmth bloomed in his chest at the thought. He felt his muscles tense, prepared to jump in if needed as he waited to see what the former Templar would do.

Cullen hesitated at the elf’s words, but he was still furious with the other man. “Solas, it isn’t right. Them judging you just because of the shape of your ears. You are one of the smartest men I have ever had the pleasure to meet. If we let people like this go by without a word or something, then we are preparing for a future where elves will be walked on forever. It is not a future I want to be part of. We are all equals.”

The man stood up slowly and turned to face Cullen again. He was half a head taller than the Commander and at least twice as wide. “You lookin’ to pick a fight?” he asked, leering down at Cullen, his shoulders squaring. “This is your last chance. Walk. Away.”

Solas could see that Cullen wasn’t going to back down. And he was right, it wasn’t right to judge someone by the shape of their ears or any other such foolish nonsense. He had hoped this trip would go smoothly, but an anger pulsed in his veins at the slur. He tipped his head and gave Cullen a look that clearly said  _ if you must. _

Cullen chuckled, giving Solas a smile, but cast look down at his half eaten plate. “Ah well. You did say you wanted a distraction, did you not?” he asked, his eyebrow raising in question before he looked back towards the burly man, his fist curling carefully before he drew it back and threw it at the man. The sickening crunch of bone beneath his fist was more than satisfying as he watched the man crumple beneath him. 

The other three men at the table jumped in surprise, and one of them got to his feet. Solas tensed, ready to jump in, but his eyes widened in surprise when the man standing extended a hand to Cullen instead of hitting him.

“About time someone shut that blowhard up,” he said. “We’ve been warning him for a while that someone was gonna get sick of his shit. You and your friend finish your meal. You won’t find any more trouble here.” He looked over to the bar and called out to the barmaid, “Put their meal on my tab.”

Cullen fixed the man with a look, giving the hand a disdainful sneer. “And how would this fight have gone had I been just another ‘knife-ear’ defending his friend? Would you be jumping up to pay for our meal then? Or would you be punching me down just as quickly as your friend?” he said sharply, “Choose your friends more carefully and you won’t have to buy every meal and the ones they assault for them.”

The guy shrugged. “If you’d still managed to knock him out, yeah. I’d still buy you a meal,” he answered and sat back down, seemingly unbothered by the fact that Cullen didn’t shake his hand. “And I wouldn’t exactly call him our friend. We just let him come around cause he’s got a lot of money and he’s piss-poor at playing Wicked Grace.” 

Solas let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding and sat back down in his chair. His foot bumped something and he frowned, reaching down to pick up the book that had fallen from his lap when he’d stood up. “Fenedhis,” he cursed, checking it over, making certain it wasn’t torn up. He tucked it back under the table on his lap and looked up as Cullen returned to the table. “You did not have to do that,” he said softly.

He shook his head and waved his hand in the air as he sat back down at the table. “Yes I did,” he murmured and looked at the half eaten steak on his plate before he looked back up at Solas, “Because if I didn’t, how many more would have to suffer those insults before someone else stood up to him?”

Solas gave a shrug as he cut into his steak, his pulse still pounding in his ears. “One learns to ignore such things after hearing them so often,” he said. He took a moment to chew another bite of the steak before he looked up and met Cullen’s eyes. He could see the defensiveness in them, the anger still blazing, and it warmed his heart. “But thank you for standing up for me. I am not used to being defended like that.” Not that Solas needed Cullen to do it, he could’ve handled that imbecile on his own if he so chose, but the gesture spoke more than words ever could.

“You shouldn’t have to be used to such things,” Cullen said, a little more sharply than he intended, and he shook his head, “My apologies, but you and other elves shouldn’t have to put up with such insults. People don’t understand how fortunate they are, that we could all be slaves and calling elves those names doesn’t lessen that fact.”

“You are a breath of fresh air, my friend,” Solas said sincerely. A small smile spread across his lips, to truly think of Cullen as his friend. It made the previous tension between them seem to lessen. “Finish your meal before it goes cold, and we can head home. You still need that chance to win your dignity back by beating me at chess.”


	8. Chapter 8

Both Solas and Cullen were in much better moods by the time Skyhold came into view. It was late in the day, the sun just beginning to set as they crossed the bridge. They’d played four rounds of chess on the trip, all of which Solas won. “Just because you defended me doesn’t mean I’m going to throw the game, Commander,” he teased as they crossed through the gate and turned their horses towards the stable. He tipped his head slightly at the sight that met him and his heart sank. Iron Bull was standing there, leaning against the doorframe, and had stood up straighter when he saw them approaching. “This doesn’t bode well,” he said and pulled his horse to a stop, easily sliding from the saddle. “What has happened?”

“The boss is hurt,” Bull answered. Though his tone was calm, there was concern in his eye and his expression was grim. “She got thrown from her horse and hit her head pretty bad. She’s up in her room. Dorian’s with her. We thought you both would want to know.”

Cullen’s eyes widened as he dropped down from the saddle, letting the stable hand take the reins from him and he looked to Bull in horror. “She was thrown from her horse? How long ago? How bad is the injury?” His heart pounded in his chest as he moved towards the Great Hall. “Bugger it all. Why does everything happen when I slack off... if I had been here…” He trailed off.

“Happened a couple hours ago,” Bull said, easily keeping stride with their hurried pace. He could see the concern in their expressions, though part of him wanted to reach over and smack Cullen for trying to blame himself. “She still hasn’t woken up.”

Solas’ breath caught in his chest at that and he nearly broke into a run to get to the door to Evie’s quarters. Surely she would be alright. She had to be. He felt a lump in his throat and he turned to Bull when they reached the door. “Thank you for telling us as soon as we arrived,” he said hurriedly, pulling the door open behind him.

“I’ll stay here,” Bull said, crossing his arms and squaring his shoulders. “Keep the nosy nobles and everyone else away.”

Solas nodded and hurried after Cullen up the stairs towards Evie’s room. “Do not blame yourself,” he said, though he was feeling especially guilty himself. “Even if we had been here, there’s no promise that we could have prevented this accident.”

Cullen didn’t know about that. It hurt to think that Evie had been injured while they had been away. He turned as soon as he cleared the last of the steps, met with Dorian’s cool gaze, a finger on his lips at them to be quiet. He swallowed harshly as he saw Evelyn laying on her bed, bandages around her head as though she would fall apart if they were not there. “Oh Andraste preserve me. What happened?”

Dorian looked over to the two men as they came into the room and he hastily brushed at the tears on his face. “Finally… we were worried that you two…” He drifted off and shook his head. “Nevermind what I thought,” he muttered and looked back to Evelyn, “It’s silly, really. We were taking the horses out for a quick ride and her’s spooked at something. I don’t know what. Could have been a mouse for all I know. She...she was thrown through the air and hit the side of the battlements. The healers,” his voice caught in his throat and he swallowed harshly, “The healers are not certain if she will wake.”

A stunned silence seemed to fill the room and Solas looked from Dorian to Evie on the bed, and for a moment he thought his heart had stopped. Might not wake up? It was like his brain couldn’t comprehend it, like time had stopped and he was left reeling. He dragged a hand down his face and turned slightly away as his mind finally caught up with itself. What did this mean? For the Inquisition, for all of Thedas? Without the magic of the anchor, Corypheus would never be defeated, all of Solas’ plans would be destroyed. And yet, somehow, all of that seemed to matter little, as if they were just foggy notions in the back of his mind. Part of him, a rather illogical part, wanted to shake her, to wake her up somehow, to see her open her eyes and smile at him. And for her to smile at Cullen. “Fenedhis,” he finally gasped out, his hand over his mouth, squeezing at his face. “There must be something more we can do.”

Dorian watched as the two drifted closer and he shook his head. “I’m afraid not. Healing magic on the brain is tricky at it’s best. All that we can do is wait and hope for the best.” He turned, bleary-eyed to his friend in the bed and he soothed her hair back out of her face. “The most we can do it feed her ice chips and be here for her when she wakes up,” he murmured before he pushed himself up. “Sit with her. I think she needs your comfort more than mine.”

Solas moved to take Dorian’s place at Evie’s side before the Tevinter had even finished his sentence. “We will watch over her, Dorian,” he promised, his voice heavy as he gingerly picked up Evie’s hand and held it. This was his fault. Perhaps Cullen was right, if he hadn’t invited the Commander along for the day, or if both of them had been there… Or if that first lunch hadn’t gone so disastrously, maybe she would’ve been spending time with one of them instead of lying here with the possibility of never waking up. He looked over his shoulder at Cullen, and without hesitation, reached for his hand and pulled him to sit on the bed with Evie as well.

Cullen moved and sat on the bed with Solas as he looked on, she looked so frail, so helpless. It wasn’t right. He closed his eyes and shook his head a moment before he reached out, threading his fingers through her hair as he watched her face for any sign of movement or wakefulness. “Evie. We’re here,” he said, almost desperately, “Please wake up.” 

Oh how Solas wished she would respond. But Evie didn’t wake, didn’t stir. She didn’t give any sign that she was even aware of their presence. “Cullen,” he said, his voice cracking, and he had to swallow hard before he tried to speak again. “She will be alright,” he said, though it tasted like a lie even as it slipped from his mouth. But he would not give up hope so easily, and the Commander looked like he needed to hear the reassurance just as much as he himself did. “We won’t leave her side until she wakes. Agreed?”

He nodded in agreement before looking back down at her again and he prayed to the Maker that she would be alright. She was the first woman in a long time that he had even considered having some kind of relationship with. She was a good friend and he was now faced with the very real possibility that she could be ripped away from this world even before they had a chance… His gut twisted. Maker help him, it wasn’t about the bloody roll in the sheets she had been after. She had been wanting some kind of connection between all three of them. Companionship. Friends. Someone they could all count on and take shelter in. “I’m a bloody fool.”

Solas looked at him, and his brow furrowed. He didn’t understand what Cullen meant by that. “No you aren’t,” he countered, feeling a protectiveness well up in him that would’ve confused him if he hadn’t been so concerned about Evie. At the moment, he didn’t have time to consider the reason for feeling that way. “What would make you say such a thing?”

Cullen shook his head. “Just thinking with the wrong head, is all. I couldn’t see what she was offering us that night. I was too hung up on the wrong things. If I hadn’t been so thick headed...” He trailed off and sighed, reaching over to the bowl of ice chips and picking one up before he held it to Evelyn’s lips. “I think we were both hung up on the wrong things, being jealous when we didn’t have to be.”

“In that case, we are both fools,” Solas agreed. If the lunch had gone better, if he and Cullen hadn’t handled things the way they did, perhaps Evie would not be in this predicament now. Maybe she would have gone with them to the crossroads, and they might have spent the day together. There were so many what-ifs running through his mind and he couldn’t make them stop. He set her hand back down on the bed and smoothed the blanket before he got to his feet, slowly pacing the room. The fire was dwindling and with a flick of his wrist, the flames rose, casting a heat into the room. “I admit, I was not as open-minded during our lunch with her as I should have been. As I’d hoped I would be.”

Cullen would later say he didn’t flinch when the flames jumped and he looked over to the mage as he began pacing. “I think we both needed time. We were too caught up on things that shouldn’t have mattered. I don’t know what I was thinking, but seeing the romantic setting that she had set up was too much too soon. If I could go back,” He turned and looked at Evie, “I would do a few things differently. I’m sorry, for what it’s worth. I didn’t mean to be like that.” 

“Nor did I. And there is no need to apologize,” Solas reassured him. “And I am not sure if it was even too much too soon, but merely our own insecurities about the situation looking for any reason to be uncomfortable. She did not intend to make it that way. Her plans were ruined and she was determined to salvage something of that day. She did it the best way she knew how.” He sighed as he turned, his eyes on her as he walked back towards the bed. Pacing wouldn’t solve anything, he knew that, but it made him feel as if he wasn’t just sitting there doing nothing. “There is much I would do differently as well. I never want to see her so upset as she looked that day.”

Cullen nodded. “I’m not certain, still, on how this would work. I’m not sure if it can, but I’d be willing to take it slow. I enjoyed our time together out today as friends. I could use more of that, I know,” he admitted before he looked back to Evie and he stood as well, dragging a hand through his hair and letting out a heavy sigh. “I’m going to send for some tea… and paperwork. I’ve never done well with long periods of quiet.”

Solas thought this was no time for focusing on work, but held his tongue. Obviously the Commander had different ways of dealing with stress and if this was how he chose to handle it, then he wasn’t going to judge him. He gave a nod. “I enjoyed our time together as well,” he said. “And stop. You are thinking too far ahead again. For now, let us just focus on her, and how we will make this up to her when she wakes.”

Cullen looked over to Solas and gave him a guilty smile. “Forgive me,” he murmured and went to the other side of the bed, sitting upon it. It was a lavish affair, a plush mattress with thick velvet curtains to block out the morning light. They were strung back now and he had to duck his head to sit comfortably. “Work was always what I was best at. With nothing to fall back on, I am at a loss now.”

“It wouldn’t hurt if you chose to do some of that work now, if it helps you to ease your mind and your worry. As long as you are here when she wakes up, that is all that matters,” Solas said as he shrugged off the pack over his shoulder. In his hurry to get to her room, he’d all but forgotten the new book he’d purchased. He withdrew it now from the pack and went and sat down on the bed again, though he didn’t know if he’d be able to focus on reading or not. He sighed down at the woman asleep on the bed and he carefully brushed a strand of hair from her forehead. “Please wake up,” he murmured, a frown pulling at his lips.

Cullen watched Solas for a moment more before he went over to the door, seeing the guard stationed just outside on the landing. He instructed him to fetch some water and after a moment of deliberation, some of the more pressing reports that he had left on his desk. Though, at the moment, he wasn’t certain if he would be able to focus on anything but Evelyn. He was grateful for the new friendship he had found in Solas and while he regretted not being there for Evie, the trip had been well spent.

* * *

 

The rest of the evening was spent mostly in worried silence, neither of them leaving Evie’s bedroom. Solas tried to read the new book, but it was as if he couldn’t absorb the words on the page, his mind was so preoccupied with what he would do if Evelyn did not wake up. He’d read the first page four times over before he even attempted to read the second. 

It was late into the night when he set the book down in his lap and scrubbed at his eye with the heel of his hand, a yawn splitting his face. He looked over to the opposite side of the bed and saw Cullen’s head nod, only for him to snap upright again and blink his eyes tiredly. 

“You should rest,” Solas said, marking his place in his book and setting it on the little table next to the bed. He stood and stretched to wake himself up. “I will watch over her if you would like to sleep for a while. I promise to wake you if she stirs.”

Cullen blinked at the lines on the reports, dry reading at best and he felt like he had barely gotten anything done. His mind had wandered and more than twice every ten minutes, he had been checking on the Inquisitor’s wellbeing. The realization that he cared for her, well and truly, was like a punch and it sucked all the air from him. “I shouldn’t. I need to stay awake,” he murmured, but put the reports aside and stood up, his back popping in several places as he stretched.

Solas could see the exhaustion in Cullen’s eyes. He felt it himself, but both of them couldn’t sleep at the same time. “It will do her no good for you to stretch yourself too thin. Rest, if only for a few hours. I will wake you. And then perhaps we can switch, if I can manage to fall asleep,” he said. He looked from the bed to the couch, uncertain of where would be best for the Commander to sleep. The bed would certainly be more comfortable, but he doubted Cullen would agree to it. “We must not forget to take care of ourselves, for her sake.”

The Commander nodded, Solas had a point and he couldn’t argue with it. He gathered up the papers he had been working on the moved them to the floor before he headed over to the couch. It was a little small but it would have to do. He felt his face flush as he glanced over at Solas and after a moment of self debate, he toed off his boots before he settled down on the couch. He had to remove his arm braces as they pinched a little much. He frowned the next moment, feeling rather uncomfortable with his chestplate.

Despite the seriousness of the situation, Solas had to bite his lips and look away to keep himself from snickering at Cullen. Didn’t the poor man realize that his armor came off? He drew a breath through his nose to make certain he wasn’t going to chuckle, then turned to look at Cullen again. “You’re going to be miserable if you try to sleep in that,” he said and walked over, offering a hand to pull the Commander to sit up. 

“Ah, yes, well,” Cullen rubbed at the back of his neck as he took Solas’s hand and sat up, “Force of habit I suppose.” He let his hands ghost over his armor ties and began to loosen it. “I practically feel naked without my armor on. One too many situations where I was caught not wearing it caused me to live in it practically non-stop.” He sighed out in comfort as his chest piece fell away and he set it aside before he removed the rest of the armor leaving him in wool trousers and a soft linen shirt. 

It was strange to see him without the armor and the mantle. Solas couldn’t recall seeing him without them, save for the Winter Palace. “Sleep well, my friend,” he said and went to sit on the edge of Evie’s bed again, and picked up his book once more.

* * *

 

He didn’t know how long he sat there staring at the pages, occasionally looking up to check on Evie or Cullen as they slept. It couldn’t have been more than a couple of hours before he saw the Commander beginning to stir in his sleep, muttering something Solas couldn’t quite make out. He tipped his head curiously and set the book aside as Cullen jerked in his sleep, turning on the couch, his face scrunching up as if in pain or anger. At first, he was tempted to just let the man rest, perhaps it was a simple bad dream, but when Cullen shouted, he decided to step in.

Solas crossed the room quickly and grabbed the man’s shoulder, giving him a harsh shake. “Cullen!” he said loudly, using his free hand to block the Commander’s fist as it swung up at him. He blinked in surprise and shook him a little harder. “Cullen, WAKE UP.”

Cullen flinched away as the demons drew closer to him, haunting faces of mages and abominations trying to torture his mind, trying to make him submit. “Begone, I don’t believe you. You aren’t real. Leave me!” One reached out and grabbed his shoulder, shaking him hard and his eyes flew open wide. “I said leave me be!” he shouted and threw a punch at the demon, only to have it morph into Solas and he stared wide eyed at the man, startled as he blinked, looking around. Evie’s room in the middle of the night. A fire crackling merrily in the fire place and the Inquisitor still fast asleep in her bed. He fell back on the couch, staring up at the elf. “Maker, Solas, I could have hurt you.”

“No harm done,” Solas said a little stiffly as he rubbed at his jaw, working it around for a moment. Well that would leave a bruise by morning. He lowered his hand and narrowed his eyes in concern as he looked at Cullen. Sweat covered Cullen’s brow and his face had gone an ashy shade of white, and it was as if he was out of breath. “Are you alright?” he asked gently, not wanting to appear too nosy or concerned. “Should I get you anything? A drink of water?” He found his concern and curiosity growing, but knew the Commander needed a moment to calm down first.

Cullen felt embarrassment surge through him and he shook his head, sitting up straighter and moving away from the other man. “No, thank you. I just need a moment,” he breathed as he leaned over and scrubbed at his face. “I didn’t mean to hit you,” he murmured, “I just have been prone to night terrors, for a while.” He licked his lips and took in a shaky breath. “They’ve gotten worse as of late.”

So this was an ongoing problem. Solas was more concerned now than ever, and he couldn’t help but to wonder what could be causing Cullen such horrible nightmares. “I don’t want to intrude,” he said, not moving from where he stood next to the couch, watching the other man with a careful eye, “But if it would help for you to talk about it, I am willing to listen.” He wondered if this had anything to do with the conversation they’d had on the way to the crossroads.

The Commander considered Solas for a moment, his fingers clenching and unclenching. He hadn’t wanted word of what he was doing to get out, but he felt he could trust the man in front of him. “You should know that I’ve stopped taking lyrium. I have for several months. After seeing its effects in not only Kirkwall, but Kinloch as well, I’ve decided to break from it. However, without it, my nightmares from the,” he closed his eyes and took a breath, “from the torture I had to endure in Kinloch are always so much worse. It’s like the voices in my mind are creeping around, the demons in the Fade know and they come to antagonize me.” 

“Torture?” Solas asked in surprise before he could stop himself, his eyebrows raising. Already, he didn’t like where this conversation was going, and he felt that protectiveness of his friend rise up in his chest. To think of Cullen being tortured… A muscle worked in his jaw and he fought to keep his expression as calm as possible. And Cullen had stopped taking lyrium. “For whatever it is worth, I respect your decision to stop taking the lyrium. It takes a strong man to break free of such chains,” he said. “If you like, I may be able to come up with something that might ease your withdrawal, if only a bit.” It baffled him how much Cullen truly had on his plate, how much the man expected of himself. “It is not weakness to ask for help, Cullen.”

Cullen leaned his head back on the couch, looking warily up at the other man. He was so tired and any relief that he could get was starting to look very appealing. “I would appreciate any help that I can get at this point. I feel as though it might be a lost cause. Just one night without any nightmares or having to relive those terrible memories.” He swallowed harshly, feeling his voice waver and crack, “I would give anything.”

Solas debated for a moment. If he were to enter the Fade as Cullen slept, perhaps he could keep the demons at bay. Yet he didn’t want both of them to sleep and for Evie to wake and neither of them know it. “It may take me some time to work out a potion to suit your needs,” he said. “But if you wish to try to sleep again, I could keep the demons away if I slept as well.” He glanced over at Evie, feeling torn. Still, they would be in her room if she woke, and she could call out to them easily enough. “I do not think she is going to wake any time soon.”

Cullen glanced over at the bed and rubbed at his face again, unsure of what to do in this instance. The prospect of a restful sleep was very alluring, but the lingering monsters from his nightmares was still fresh in his mind. “Perhaps another time. I think I am awake for better or worse at this point. You should get some rest now, my friend. I’ll stay up and watch over her.” 

Solas nearly protested, but he could see that Cullen wasn’t going to be able to fall back asleep anytime soon. He nodded and moved to lay on the couch as Cullen stood, shifting around until he found a comfortable position. “I will work something out to help you as soon as possible,” he promised, his mind already going over possible potions that might reduce the withdrawal from lyrium as well as to ease Cullen’s mind so he could get some restful sleep. “Do not let me sleep too long. And wake me if she stirs at all.”

He smiled down at the elf and nodded, “I will and thank you. For listening. It is not something I share often or enjoy doing, but it was good to let that weight off of my chest.” He said before he turned and went over to sit next to Evelyn’s side, peering down at her sadly, wishing that she would wake.

* * *

 

Solas awoke to early morning light streaming through the tall windows. He screwed up his face and sat up, feeling a crick in his neck, and a heaviness in his heart. “You let me sleep too long,” he said to Cullen, his voice still thick with sleep, and he got to his feet to cross the room. Slowly shaking his head, he reached out and let his fingers brush a long strand of Evie’s pale blonde hair back from her neck, and he had to swallow harshly. “I looked for her,” he admitted without looking at Cullen as he spoke. “I’d hoped that if she were sleeping, that I could find her in her dreams.” His voice grew quieter and he let his thumb trail over her cheekbone. “I looked everywhere,” he nearly whispered.

Cullen looked over at the other man. “Maybe she’s just not dreaming. Might be somewhat of a good thing, the demons won’t be able to get her,” he murmured and stretched, his body was aching and felt dull to the world. Little sleep, a throbbing headache and worry making him feel worse than usual. “And sorry about the sleep. I figured you could use as much as you could get. She barely stirred at all,” he said and ran a hand through his hair, “Do you want something to eat?”

“No, thank you,” Solas said, shaking his head. “I’m not hungry this morning.” He finally tore his eyes away from Evelyn and looked at Cullen. “If you want to get something to eat, go ahead. I may have something later.” He hoped that Cullen was right, that perhaps Evie just wasn’t dreaming. He didn’t have the heart to tell Cullen that he’d always easily found her in dreams before. He ran a hand down his face, trying to chase away the last bit of sleep, and moved to sit on the edge of the bed. “It still feels like there should be something more we could do.”

He nodded and followed Solas’s gaze as they both looked on Evelyn, both of them seemed to be holding their breath and just waiting for her to come around. “I think later, I might take you up on that offer to help me sleep. Ah, but you need to be asleep for that.” He shook his head, trying to get the dust out of his thoughts. “I’ll just try to sleep on my own later. If I have, ah, trouble, just throw some water on me.” He looked at the bruise on the elf’s chin, “Sorry about that.”

Solas chuckled. “Or perhaps prod you with a long stick,” he joked. He waved a hand dismissively in the air, though he could feel a slight ache in his chin. “I have suffered far worse, I assure you. It’s nothing to be concerned about. I know it was not on purpose.” He looked over when he heard the door open and close, and footsteps on the stairs. He stiffened, not knowing who to expect. He didn’t think the guards would let anyone into the room but perhaps the inner circle, but if it were Sera or Vivienne, he would have no problem telling them to turn around and go back. He was not in the mood for either of them this morning. He relaxed the next moment when he recognized the woman coming up the stairs as one of the healers, and he got up from the bed to give her space. 

She offered a small smile to both men as she crossed the room to the Inquisitor’s bedside and set the supplies in her hands on the bed. “Any change?” she asked, but frowned when Cullen shook his head. She was acutely aware of their eyes on her as she began to undo the bandages, but she was careful as ever as she worked. She gently lifted Evelyn’s head with one arm and unwound the bandages, then set the old ones aside as she laid the woman back down, turning Evie slightly to the side so she could see the wound. The blonde hair was thickly matted with blood and she frowned again.

Cullen felt his heart drop as he saw the state of Evelyn’s head and he nearly faltered, stumbling forward, his eyes widening at the sight. “Oh sweet Andraste,” he breathed, “Dorian didn’t say that it was this bad!” He bit down on his knuckle as he watched the healer work, nearly tasting blood as he watched, the coppery scent thick in the air. 

Solas reached out and caught Cullen as the man took a stumbling step forward, holding him to his side as he felt his stomach lurch. The blood was thick, yet fresher than he imagined it should have been. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to rein in the emotions he felt as he still gripped Cullen’s arms. He felt sick at seeing how bad her injury truly was, angry at himself for allowing himself and Cullen to leave Skyhold the day before, and frightened because he now understood why Dorian had been so upset. She truly might not wake up. He let out a string of elven curse words under his breath and finally looked up again, watching over the healer’s shoulder as she worked.

Cullen swallowed hard as he watched the healer work, his hand gripping Solas’s arm tightly as he did. “There has to be something more that we can do instead of sitting around ‘hoping’ that she’s going to pull through.” He grit his teeth and looked to the elf at his side, trying to see if there was a spark of an idea in his eyes. He rubbed at his eyes with his free hand and looked away. “Bugger it all, this is my fault. Being so damn stubborn… I should have tried harder that day.”

“Shh,” Solas quieted him. “It was not solely your fault, lethallin. We both could have tried harder.” He moved one hand to comfortingly squeeze the back of Cullen’s neck, mimicking the way the Commander so often comforted himself when stressed or embarrassed. He swallowed the lump in his throat and the stinging in his eyes. “All hope is not lost,” he whispered sternly. He could feel Cullen trying to pull away ever-so-slightly, but Solas didn’t let him. “Cullen,” he said a little firmer and grabbed the Commander’s chin, turning his face so they were nearly nose to nose. He could see the guilt and the heartache in those golden brown eyes, and he put as much intensity into his gaze as he could muster. “Do not give up on her yet. Do not. And when she finally wakes, we will find a way. For her. Do not give up hope.”

His breath caught in his throat at the sheer intensity of the gaze the elf gave him. The absolute confidence that the man exuded was more comforting than he could have thought possible and he found himself nodded, their foreheads bumping together as he did so. He tried to swallow the lump in his throat and he looked back over at the bed. “We will have to at least try this time. Really try. She didn’t deserve this. She’s been through more than enough. She deserves better.”

The guilt in Solas’ chest seemed to increase tenfold. Evie did deserve better. And everything she’d been through had been his fault. He was well and truly tempted to let Cullen have her, she would be better off that way, and yet he knew that she wouldn’t be happy without the both of them. He swallowed and gave a slow nod, his hand still on the back of Cullen’s neck, squeezing it again. “We will make a true effort to make it work. I believe we have a better chance of making this work this time. We are more friends now that we have ever been, aren’t we?”

Cullen nodded, closing his eyes as he suddenly became more aware of the hand on the back of his neck. It was familiar and yet completely new at the same time. It surprised him to find that it was calming in a way he didn’t expect and he leaned back into the touch of the other man. He was still nervous, but the anxiety from the first date had dissipated and while it was still somewhat new to him, he didn’t feel the jealousy, nor what contact with him would mean.

Solas could feel how stiff Cullen’s neck was, the tightness of the muscles, and for a moment he worked his fingers and thumb in small circles, trying to relieve some of the tension. But only for a moment; he didn’t want the other man to get the wrong impression or who knew what Cullen could’ve thought in that moment, in that circumstance. He gently pulled away from the Commander and turned his attention to the healer again, who was wrapping the new bandages around Evelyn’s head. He cleared his throat loudly, words escaping him in that moment.

“She’s not out of the woods yet,” she answered, finishing up and turning to face them. “The swelling’s gone down a bit, but that’s all. Just keep giving her the ice chips, keep her comfortable, and let me or one of the other healers know if anything changes. And be mindful of what you say. There’s a chance she can hear you. I’ll be back around midday to check on her.”

Cullen blinked after the healer as she left and he looked back to the bed hopefully. He wandered around to the other side, sitting down and scooting across the bed so he could pick up Evie’s hand, holding it carefully. “You think she can hear us?” he asked as he brushed a lock of hair out of her eyes. “I hope she can. So that she knows we’re here for her,” he murmured. 

How it had slipped Solas’ mind that Evie might’s been able to hear them, he didn’t know. He blamed it on the stress and the worry. He moved to sit on the side of the bed and took her other hand. “It is not unheard of. I have seen it before, in the Fade. A person in such a state wakes up and says that he or she could hear what was happening around them, even if they gave no sign of consciousness,” he said. He could see the affection for Evie in Cullen’s eyes, and for the first time, it sparked a warmth in his chest instead of jealousy. “Evie,” he said, looking down at her, “We’re here. Cullen and I, we’re both here. We’re not leaving your side.” He licked his lips, casting a glance at Cullen before he continued. “And when you wake up, we’re going to try harder. For you.”

Cullen found himself nodding in agreement. “If, you know, you want to give us thickheaded fools a second chance after we mucked up your picnic,” he said, a laugh working through his lips as he drew his thumb over her knuckles. “We’ll treat you to the picnic next time. Get those little cakes you like from Val Royeaux,” he murmured, “And keep our jealousy out of the equation this time.” 

Solas could’ve sworn he saw the corners of Evie’s mouth twitch in a smile, if only for an instant. Were his eyes playing tricks on him? He blinked harshly and looked again, but there was no further sign that she had heard them. Still, it made his heart leap and gave him more hope than he’d had since they’d first heard of her accident. “I believe she can hear us, Commander,” he said softly, a small smile of his own on his face, and he lovingly brushed her hair back again, squeezing her hand slightly. “She will come through this. If anyone can, it will be her.”


	9. Chapter 9

The day seemed to drag on as Solas and Cullen watched over Evie, speaking softly to her, both of them watching with bated breath in the hopes that she would wake up. Others of the inner circle stopped by periodically throughout the day to check on her; Cassandra came by in the morning to tell Cullen that she would keep training the soldiers until he was prepared to come back to work. Dorian and Bull checked in with them around lunch, bringing them food from the tavern, though neither Cullen or Solas ate very much. Varric stayed for an hour or so in the afternoon, visiting with them and breaking up the silence a bit. And Solas was even able to tolerate Sera for a little while when she showed up with Blackwall to bring Evie some flowers (though to be fair, Sera was far better behaved than was normal for her.)

It was late evening when Solas yawned, glad to have had the company and to know that others cared so much for the Inquisitor, yet glad at the same time to be rid of them now. He rubbed at his eyes and looked over at Cullen, who was bent over more reports as he sat next to Evie on the bed, one hand holding hers and the other the papers. “Should we try to rest?” Solas asked. “We can sleep in shifts again, or I can enter the Fade as you sleep and see if I can’t grant you some respite from the demons. It is your choice.”

Cullen looked up from his work, a groan forcing itself out of mouth as his neck protested and he reached back, rubbing at the stiff muscles carefully. “Actually, I’m rather exhausted. I’d be willing to try just about anything to get some uninterrupted sleep. I’m not actually certain if I can even remember what it feels like. It has been a long while since I have slept the night away.” He moved the papers away and tossed them to the floor before he stood up and stretched, looking back over to the couch. “Um, how should we do this?”

“However you like,” Solas said, standing and stretching. “I can sleep on the floor and you on the couch. Or I can lay on the couch and you can sleep on that side of Evie’s bed. I do not think she would mind very much.” He could see Cullen about to protest that it wouldn’t be proper, and he gave a soft chuckle. “If you prefer the couch, that is fine with me. I do not mind sleeping on the floor. I can sleep almost anywhere.”

“And she will get on me for making you sleep on the floor. I’ll take the couch, you can sleep on that side of the bed,” he reasoned and headed for the couch, sitting down on it before the elf could tell him otherwise. “Besides, if this works, I wouldn’t want you getting another crick in your neck just because you were helping me chase away demons. I wouldn’t want you hurt on my behalf,” he said quietly as he reclined back. 

“Says the man who punched me upon waking last night,” Solas teased as he walked around to the other side of the bed. He felt a flutter in his stomach, a nervousness at laying in the same bed with Evie. Still, he would stay as close to the edge of her bed as possible, for the sake of respect. He moved almost stiffly as he laid down, glaring across the room at Cullen. “The floor would’ve been fine,” he said but sighed and laid his head on the pillow. He had to admit, the plush bed was far more comfortable than the floor could ever have been. 

He stared up at the canopy overhead, mentally preparing himself to defend the Commander from the demons. From what little Cullen had said, it seemed as though the demons tormented him nightly. That meant they knew he was an easy target and were likely waiting for him. 

Solas chewed his lip for a moment, debating something. It would be easier to chase away the demons in his wolf-form, yet that was something he had not shared with anyone. Not since before he created the Veil and sealed the elven gods away. How much of elven lore did Cullen know? Probably not much, he reasoned. Even the elves didn’t truly know much of their own lore. It didn’t seem like the sort of thing Cullen would be interested in.

“You may not recognize me in the Fade,” Solas finally said. “There is another form I can take in the Fade, and it will make it easier to keep the demons at bay. If you see a white wolf in your dreams, do not be afraid. It is me.”

Cullen blinked at Solas, tilting his head, but he shook it the next moment. The exhaustion was too great and he found he didn’t mind. “As long as it keeps the monsters away, you won’t find me complaining,” he said, a yawn splitting his face the next moment and he waved a hand, “Forgive me. It’s been a long day.” 

“I understand,” Solas answered with a chuckle, turning on his side to look at Evie for a moment as she slept. Part of him wanted to go looking for her in the Fade again, but he had made a promise to Cullen and he would keep it. He reached out and gently touched her cheek. “Goodnight, Evie,” he said in a low voice, feeling a knot forming in his throat again. He pulled his hand back and tucked it under the pillow, closing his eyes before muttering, “Goodnight, Cullen.”

Cullen wasn’t sure what was supposed to happen within his dreams. That suddenly with Solas’s help, the demons would be gone and that he would be able to procure a restful night’s sleep. No. Nothing could ever be that simple. He was crying, finding himself once again locked away in Kinloch Hold. Magic pressing down on him like a vice as the screams of his friends and colleagues reached his ears. They were being tortured as usual and he was going to be next. It felt like someone slipping a knife into his skull, slowly twisting it until all he could feel was a white hot reality that wouldn’t end. “I will not break!” he shouted at the void beyond his prison, “Release me and leave me be!”

Solas had hoped he would reach Cullen before the demons did, but no such luck. He had transformed the moment he entered the Fade and now he raced to find the Commander. He skidded to a halt when he reached him, seeing the nightmare that Cullen was trapped in. It seemed much more than a nightmare, for it to be so vivid. It was a memory. The demons swirled around him, making the memory that much more real, that much worse, and Solas felt a rage boil up inside him. He growled low in his throat, his teeth bared, and he launched himself into the dream, attacking the first demon he saw with a vicious bite.

Cullen gasped out loud as he saw the large wolf suddenly lunge at one of his tormentors, tearing them away from the circle that was surrounding him, making it weaken. He pulled back, curling in on himself. It might be Solas, but then it might also be another demon, one that looked into his thoughts and saw the glimmer of hope that he had been promised by the elf. He grabbed his head with both hands, rocking back and forth as the sounds of fighting and screaming began again. “Maker, please let it end!”

Solas flung the demon away, turning to attack another as it made to grab at him. It almost felt good to fight, after all the stress and worry over Evelyn. He snarled and sank his fangs into the demon, then chased after another as it tried to escape. Within just a matter of minutes, the demons were gone and the scene around Cullen faded. Solas turned, concern in his eyes as he saw the state of the normally strong Commander. He looked truly terrified. Solas ducked his head and whined, unable to speak otherwise in this form, and took a careful step towards Cullen.

Cullen gasped as he watched the wolf approach him and he swallowed harshly. He glanced around, the normal scene he was used to seeing was gone. The nightmare over before it had really begun and he let out a shuddering sigh before he let himself sink backwards until he was sitting on the floor. He was still shaking, the fear of the nightmare still singing through his veins and it took him a moment longer to regain his composure. He looked up when he did, seeing the fearsome beast standing there, his head bowed, looking regal and every bit the master of his surroundings. “I’m sorry you had to see that,” he murmured, his hand lifting and after a moment’s hesitation he stretched it towards the wolf.

Solas’ ears twitched and he stepped closer, still moving slowly, and nuzzled the Commander’s outstretched hand. At least Cullen knew that he wasn’t the enemy here. It was easier, somehow, in this form to let go of many of the preoccupations of his waking life. This was truer to his nature, and the wolf was not so quick to judge, or to feel jealousy. He slightly wagged his tail and took another step closer, bumping Cullen’s chin with his nose in an almost affectionate canine sort of way.

Cullen let a laugh be pulled from him and he scratched Solas behind his ears. “Thank you. I’m not entirely sure what to do with myself now. It’s been a long while since I’ve seen something other than Kinloch or Kirkwall in my nightmares.” He pulled back and rubbed at his face. “Maker, I’m exhausted,” he murmured and laid down on the ground, “Sleeping in a dream. That’s a thing, right?”

Solas nodded, pleased to see that Cullen would finally have a decent night’s sleep. He knew that if he left his side, the demons would come swarming back around, looking to torment Cullen all over again. He raised his head and looked around, his ears working back and forth for a moment. Satisfied that the demons were gone, he moved around Cullen, nosing at him to raise his head, then laid down, curling protectively around him. 

Cullen smiled sleepily at the action and felt a warmth spreading over him, lulling him to sleep. He turned his face into the soft fur, lifting a hand to the coat, his fingers threading through the soft strands. He blinked a moment, feeling exhaustion tugging at him and he couldn’t help but chuckle. “Don’t take this the wrong way,” he murmured, letting his eyes slide closed, “But I’ve always wanted a dog.”

An amused snort escaped Solas, though part of him wished he could correct Cullen.  _‘ Wolf,’ _ he thought, but understood the other man’s sentiment. He gave Cullen’s hand a playful nip, thumping his tail on the ground for a moment. It had been a long time since he had felt the companionship that he now felt towards this human, and even longer since another living being had seen him in this form and hadn’t run away in fear. It made him long to be able to tell Cullen and Evie the truth about what he was, to be able to share that with someone. He closed his eyes and a soft huff escaped him. No, no matter how close he got, he could not do that. He shifted slightly and laid his head down, his keen eyes keeping watch for any sign that the demons might try to return.

Cullen slept, uninterrupted by the nightmares and demons that usually haunted his dreams, for the longest period of time he could remember since the events in Kinloch. It was a long bloody time. As he drifted towards wakefulness, how ever many hours later, he mused to himself, trying to recall when it was last that he had a restful, dreamless sleep and he determined it had to be at least five years, maybe even ten. He would have to figure out a way to thank Solas later. He didn’t know if a mere thanks would ever be enough.

Solas could feel Cullen beginning to stir and he knew that he would be waking soon. At least he would wake on his own instead of being shaken from his sleep by night terrors. Solas’ ear twitched as he heard something he didn’t expect, and for a moment he wasn’t certain if he’d heard correctly.

“Solas? …. Cullen?”

Solas raised his head, his ears perked forward and his heart racing. That… that was Evie’s voice, calling out to them. He looked around, expecting to see her walking towards them in the Fade, but he saw nothing. When he heard it again, he realized she wasn’t calling from the Fade. His heart leapt and he jumped up, turning quickly to nose at Cullen, trying to wake him. When the Commander opened his eyes, Solas let out a bark and wagged his tail. Oh to hell with it. He could wake Cullen in the real world. And he vanished from the dream.

“Evie?” Solas asked the second he awoke and he quickly propped himself up on his elbow to look at her. He thought his heart might burst from his chest when she turned her head, blinking her eyes at him. A relief crashed through him and he reached for her hand, pressing a firm kiss to her knuckles. “We feared…”

“It’s going to take more than a stupid horse to kill me,” she said, though her throat was dry and her voice scratchy. She smiled and squeezed his hand, the pure relief in his eyes warming her heart. She didn’t know how long she’d been unconscious. But she did know that he and Cullen had been there with her.

“Cullen!” Solas called across the room. “Cullen wake up!”

Cullen woke with a start on the couch, flipping over only to fall to the floor with a cry, “Andraste’s sweet knickers!” He cursed and groaned as he rolled over, rubbing at his sore rear before he froze and looked over to the bed, his eyes going wide and his heart thudding as he saw Evelyn sitting up, looking a little worse for wear, but she was alive. She was awake. “Evie!” He scrambled to his feet and rushed over to the side of the bed. She looked exhausted, but there was a smile on her lips and he fell to his knees, picking up her other hand. “Thank the Maker. We feared the worst.”

“I’m sorry I worried you,” she said softly, giving his hand a squeeze before she lifted her hand to cup his cheek. She felt weak and tired, her head splitting, but she was happy to see the both of them. “I heard you while I was sleeping. Both of you. Just bits and pieces, but I knew your voices and I knew you were here with me.”

Solas sat up more in the bed and scooted a little closer, never releasing her hand. “We should have been here,” he said, his voice quiet and heavy. “If we had been here, if things had gone differently over the last week…”

“Hush,” she interrupted him. “It wasn’t your fault.” She looked at Cullen again, mustering up the sternest look she possibly could. “And it wasn’t your fault either. It was an accident. That’s all.”

Cullen leaned into her hand, turning to press a kiss to her palm. “That doesn’t change the fact that we should have been here for you. Maker, I feel like such a fool.” He glanced over at Solas and then back to her. “If you’re willing, I think we’d like to give this, us, another go. We were both a bit on the wrong page that first night and, well, you know men and our egos,” he joked.

Evie laughed at that, but immediately winced as pain lanced through her skull. “Oh, don’t make me laugh,” she said, but managed to still smile a bit. Normally her heart would’ve been racing to feel Cullen kiss her palm, to hold Solas’ hand so tightly, but she was too exhausted to be excited. Instead, a calm sort of warmth seemed to fill her entire being and it comforted her in a way she’d never felt before. “I would like that,” she said softly. Something had changed between the two men, she could feel it in the air. The tension that had been there before was gone. She licked her lips carefully and shifted on the bed a bit. “Would it be inappropriate to ask that we have another meal together? Now?” she asked. “I’m starving.”

Solas chuckled and exchanged a look with Cullen. “I think we can do that,” he answered. He kissed her hand again, then carefully moved off of the bed. “I’ll send for breakfast and be right back.”

Evie moved on the bed, scooting over a bit, then patted the space next to her. “Come up here with me,” she said to Cullen. She didn’t like seeing him kneel on the floor like that. “Please?”

Cullen gave her a small smile and nodded, groaning as he stood up before he crawled onto the bed with her. He leaned back against the headboard with a soft moan; the bed was squishy in all the best ways and he leaned his head back with a sigh. “Maker, Josephine really didn’t spare any expense, did she?” he asked before he looked back to Evelyn and he sat up straighter, looking over the blood-soaked bandages on her head. “You still look beautiful,” he murmured.

Evie’s heart fluttered and she felt a slight blush across her face. “Flatterer,” she teased, almost shyly. She certainly didn’t feel beautiful in that moment. She reached for his hand and threaded their fingers together, a million questions burning in her mind about how he and Solas had managed to open up to the idea of this sort of relationship. While she didn’t want to spoil her chances, she had to know. “How did you and Solas work this out? I mean, I’m happy to hear it, but I don’t want either of you agreeing to this just because you feel guilty that I got hurt. That’s not how I want it to be. If we’re going to try this, I want it to be because all three of us want it.”

He chuckled. “It’s quite the tale,” he said as he looked down at their hands threaded together, “I’m not certain if it will work out, but I suppose it has a better chance now than before. More or less, we had a successful outing to the Crossroads. Got to talk to one another without the other trying feeling jealous about you in the middle. Turns out, we have a bit more in common with each other than we knew. He’s a good man, I’m glad I took the time to get to know him better.”

“You’re both good men,” she said, a smile spreading across her lips. It was heartwarming to hear that they’d come to this point on their own and not because they felt some sort of obligation to her. She looked up as Solas came back into the room, carrying a large tray laden with bacon, eggs, toast, juice, and tea. “Oh now you’re just trying to spoil me,” she said as he set the tray on the bed.

“You say that as if it’s a bad thing,” he answered and sat himself carefully on the bed, watching as she helped herself to the food. It was such a relief to see her awake again, to hear her voice again. “I asked for the servants to bring up a bath for you as well,” he said as he reached for a piece of the bacon, his stomach growling. He and Cullen had barely eaten anything in the two days they’d spent at her bedside. “I thought it might help you feel better.”

Evie’s eyes closed and her head tilted back as she chewed for a moment. “I’d accept anything that makes me feel better at this point,” she said. Sinking into a steaming hot bath sounded amazing. “Especially if it makes my head stop throbbing.”

Cullen smiled as he stole a bite of the eggs. “The healer should be back before too long. Undoubtedly with something to help you with the headache. I’d imagine it’s going to be sore for a little while,” he said as he looked her over, still not quite believing that she was awake. “I hope that I’m not still dreaming. I would dream that you woke up,” he said quietly, watching her as she fixed herself a cup of tea.

Evelyn smiled as she sipped at the tea, relishing in its warm and the way it soothed her parched throat. This felt amazing, this sort of easy comfort between the three of them. “If it is a dream, then I hope we never wake up.” 


	10. Chapter 10

It was a few days later when the healers finally allowed Evelyn to leave her room. Not that she complained at all. She’d spent most of that time with Solas and Cullen, playing games of Diamondback on her bed, eating their meals together, and enjoying each other’s company. It amazed her, this new friendship that she could see growing between Cullen and Solas. And she hoped that things would continue to go well once they left the secluded comfort of her room.

She didn’t realize just how much work she had missed until the walked into the war room that morning and saw the reports piled high in front of Josephine and Leliana. “Uuuuugh,” she groaned, walking a little slower and dragging her feet towards the war table. “Never mind. I think the concussion is still here. I need to go lay back down.”

Cullen chuckled, resting his hands on the hilt of his sword. He had enjoyed the time spent with her and Solas both while she recovered from her injury. “Afraid the world kept on moving while you were getting your head back in order.” He smiled and looked over the stack of paperwork to be done, “Although, I think I feel a concussion coming on as well. Maker, what are all of those?”

Leliana smiled sweetly at him. “Oh you know, a little bit of this and a little bit of that. The vast majority, however, are yours. Notes of admiration and questions about your lineage from interested parties at the Winter Palace. Some of them are rather quiet generous,” she said exchanging a look with Josephine, giggling with her.

“Andraste preserve me,” Cullen muttered and ran a hand over his face, his cheeks burning at the thought of that place. All of the people closing in, touching him. He shuddered. “Feel free to use those requests as kindling,” he muttered and looked over at Evelyn, shaking his head, “I’d sooner rather forget about that entire mess.”

Evie felt herself bristle at the thought of the nobles having the audacity to keep pestering Cullen. It sparked a sense of jealousy in her, and she shot a glare at Leliana. “I think Cullen’s made it more than apparent that he’s not interested,” she said, trying to keep the bite out of her voice. Leliana was too sharp for this. Surely the Spymaster knew that Evie and Cullen fancied each other. “Do you really think it’s necessary to keep… _encouraging_ this sort of thing?”

Leliana simply smiled. “It is useful information to have, Inquisitor. Think of how many nobles we could have eating out of our hands if we know little tidbits such as this about them,” she justified. “All the dear Commander has to do is look pretty. The nobles are not all that bad, not entirely,” she said, “You do them a favor and then they will do favors for us. Think of how much good you would be doing the Inquisition.”

“Favors?” Evelyn asked incredulously. She didn’t like the way Leliana said it. It made her think of the Templars at the Circle who used to promise the mages preferential treatment in exchange for “favors.” She glanced at Cullen, who looked rather uncomfortable, and then glared at Leliana again. “Just what sort of _favors_ would you have my -” She paused, blushing, and stumbled over her words, “The Inquisition’s Commander do?” She pinched the bridge of her nose, letting out a heavy sigh. “Nevermind. I don’t want to know. You have better ways of getting information than this. Cullen isn’t some carrot hanging on a string for these nobles. Now put those away and I don’t want to hear about it again,” she said sternly, then shot a look at Josephine, “From either of you.”

A guilty look crossed Josephine’s face, and she glanced nervously over at Leliana. “We, ah, may have already… ahem… set up a meeting?” she said, looking at the writing board in her hand and fiddling with the papers. “A simple luncheon with a young noble from a very prominent family in Orlais. It won’t take much of your time, Commander, and doing so will provide much needed support for our cause.”

“Cancel the meeting,” Evie demanded. “Write this noble lord whoever the hell and tell him that Cullen isn’t available.”

If possible, Josephine looked even more sheepish. “He is already here. Waiting for you in the Great Hall.”

Cullen threw his hands up in the air and turned away from the table. “Of course he is!” He squeezed his eyes shut and ran a hand over his face, pinching at his brow, trying to will away the headache that was well on its way to becoming a migraine. “I’m surprised you didn’t already arrange the marriage. You didn’t want to hear what I had to say about this?” He turned to both Leliana and Josephine. “Send him home or I will. I don’t bloody care if he’s going to support us, give us a palace or anything else. I’m not interested.”

Josephine flinched at Cullen’s outburst. “I did not realize how adamant you were about this,” she said cautiously. Still, the support from the Orlesian noble family was not something the Inquisition could afford to lose. “We don’t expect you to be interested,” she said. “If you could just have lunch with the man, make pleasant conversation. Surely you can manage that much to better the Inquisition?”

Evelyn rolled her eyes. No wonder Cullen didn’t eat much. Every meal he had seemed to turn into a disaster.

Leliana nodded, folding her arms behind her back. “Josie is right. This little lunch is hardly worth the fuss that you are putting up over it. I didn’t think, with your new interests and all, that this would be such a big deal for you to just smile and look pretty. This one is far more agreeable than some of the suitors that you encountered at the Winter Palace.”

Cullen whirled around, shaking as a cold feeling gripped his chest and he grit his teeth as he pointed a finger at her. “What I do with my affairs are private and are not to be used as your leverage.” He sucked in a breath and glanced over at Evie before he looked back to Leliana, “Fine, I’ll have lunch, but he is going home disappointed. And if you schedule any more of these ‘meetings,’ don’t think I won’t hesitate to throw them off the battlements!”

“That’s all we ask,” Josephine said, feeling a little relieved, but a little worried as well. She hoped that the Commander could control his temper long enough to get through the meal without offending the noble. She cleared her throat and looked down at the other reports on the war table. “Now, to attend to other matters…”

Evelyn stewed for the rest of their meeting, her decisions a little more aggressive than normal as they went over the various options and situations to be addressed. She didn't like this at all, the way they intended to use Cullen. She wanted to join him for this lunch and let the noble know that by no means was Cullen available. Though she and the Commander weren’t anything official yet, that didn’t change the way she felt.

“I believe that’s all for today,” Josephine finally said a few hours later. She tidied up her papers and looked to Cullen. “Shall I introduce you to Lord Alain Dufont?” she asked, her tone pleasant, but slightly nervous. She feared another outburst.

Cullen definitely had a full blown headache and he pinched the bridge of his nose a moment before he nodded and grit his teeth. He looked to Evelyn and sighed. “Dinner tonight? I am certain that it will be better than whatever I am about to endure,” he forced out, trying to delay having to go be what basically amounted to eye candy for the Inquisition, “Have lunch with Solas. Eat double for me.”

Evelyn nodded, her lips pressed to a thin line as she watched him sigh and finally give in, trailing along behind Josephine. She shot Leliana the most hateful look she could muster. Normally she got along very well with the Spymaster, but today she wanted to hit her. “Shame on you,” she hissed, then turned and stormed out the door.

Josephine led the way to the Great Hall and over to a table where the noble was waiting. “Lord Dufont, may I present Commander Cullen Rutherford,” she said professionally as the lord stood and gave a bow.

“I am so pleased you agreed to meet with me for lunch, Commander,” he purred, a smug sort of smile pulling at his lips, though most of his face was hidden by the ornate mask he wore. He stood straight again and made a show of pulling out the other chair for Cullen before he sat in his own chair. “I’ve heard that you have had many inquiries since your visit to the Winter Palace. Have you answered many of them?”

 _‘Be pleasant, be pleasant, be pleasant,’_ Cullen repeated over and over in his head as he sat down at the table. He swallowed thickly before he met the other man’s gaze. “No, I have not. I’m sorry to say that most of them have gotten lost along the way. It would be a great tragedy, if I had not already committed myself elsewhere,” he said, thinking of Evie and Solas. What he wouldn’t give to be having lunch with them instead.

The corners of Lord Alain’s mouth twitched, the hint of a smile never leaving his lips. “Or perhaps you were holding out for something better, yes?” he asked, his grey eyes almost dancing behind his mask. “Of course that is the case. A wise decision, biding your time until someone of my standing came along.” There was a haughtiness in his movements as he sat back in his chair and sipped at his glass of wine. “I am surprised that someone hasn’t managed to get you to settle down yet. Though I suppose an attractive man such as yourself likes to keep his options open.” He paused and looked around at the Hall, the people there, and sneered slightly. “Or perhaps there simply isn’t much to choose from.”

Cullen swallowed harshly, his eyes narrowing on the man in front of him. ‘ _Stay calm, stay calm,’_ he thought to himself. “The people here are just fine. More than one has managed to capture my attention.” He nearly smacked himself, that was hardly being pleasant. He couldn’t find it within himself to care at that particular moment. He tilted his head at the Lord, “Why are you so interested, might I ask? I grew up a poor boy from Honnleath.”

Lord Alain waved his hand dismissively as he downed the rest of his wine. “That hardly matter now, my dear Commander. Your position in the Inquisition makes up for any lack of nobility in your blood,” he answered, pausing for a moment as the servants brought them their lunch. He wrinkled his nose slightly beneath his mask at the braised rabbit. “And while you claim that there are some here that may have caught your attention, here you sit. With me.” He smirked again as he picked at his lunch, finally taking a small bite. “They must not be _that_ interesting.”  He gave the Commander another sweeping look, the smirk on his face growing. “I imagine I could give you plenty of attention in return,” he said in a low voice.

Cullen couldn’t stop the unpleasant shiver that worked it’s way through him at the thought of the noble across from him giving any attention to him. “Appearances are not always what they seem, my Lord,” he said in a deadly quiet voice that he was certain the man across from him had not picked up on.

* * *

 

“Evelyn, what are you-”

“Shh!” she hushed Solas as she dragged him along with her into the Great Hall, pausing to make sure they wouldn’t be seen by the noble Cullen sat with. She bit her lip and looked around, then ducked low and hurried over to crouch behind Varric, still dragging Solas with her. “Varric, don’t move,” she hissed, peering over the dwarf’s shoulder to spy on Cullen and Lord Alain. “This is all Leliana’s doing. Look at that prick, thinking he has a shot with Cullen. The only shot he’s gonna get is if I snatch up that crossbow and put a bolt between his eyes,” she whispered.

Solas sighed, gave Varric a look of apology, then moved to sit casually in a chair at the dwarf’s table. “We’d draw less attention by simply sitting with Master Tethras,” he said in a quiet voice, but Evie ignored him. His eyes were drawn across the room to where Cullen sat and he felt himself bristle, though he wasn’t entirely sure why. He and Cullen were still just friends, and that might have been all they would ever be towards each other. Still, he cared for Evelyn, and he knew that she cared for Cullen as well, and he supposed that seeing her like this because of the noble was what caused him to feel a sense of… being territorial? Either way, he didn’t much care for the scene before him.

Varric raised an eyebrow and turned his head to look over his shoulder at Evelyn. “Oh this looks good. Why is the Inquisitor hiding behind my chair? I have to remind you, I’m rather short, most people just have to lift their heads to see behind me.” He looked over at Solas a moment before he followed their gazes to the table where the Commander was having lunch with a noble that looked far too much like the cat that got the cream. “Wait, this is about Curly?” He looked back at the two of them, his eyebrows going up, “Well, shit. You two are jealous?”

“No,” Solas answered a little too quickly, and he cleared his throat before he spoke again. “I believe Evie may be a bit, but I…” He paused for a moment as he thought about it. What was it he was feeling? He wasn’t sure how to put it into words and he didn’t want to give Varric the wrong idea. It wasn’t like he and Cullen were in a relationship. Then again, they kind of were. “I’m certain it’s of little interest to you.”

“I’m jealous. I admit it. Now hush,” Evie said, peering over Varric’s shoulder again. “You don’t have to be taller than me. Just… you know…” She paused and patted his shoulders, indicating how much broader his were than her own. “I’m good. Now shhh. I wanna hear what they’re saying.”

“Mmmhmmm,” Varric said as he shook his head and started writing again. “Sparkler would say you’re giving me ideas. You should be careful, most of what I see around here is literary gold. And weird shit. Mostly the weird shit,” he said as he looked back over to Cullen. “How did Curly get himself into having lunch with pomp and circumstance over there?”

“Leliana and Josephine,” Evie hissed bitterly, her eyes widening a bit when the noble reached under the table and placed his hand on Cullen’s knee. She could see the Commander’s posture stiffen and the way he tried to not-so-subtly move from the lord’s touch. “I may not have to borrow Bianca,” she said, “I think Cullen may finish this guy off himself.”

Solas watched Cullen and Lord Alain with a keen eye. If this kept up more, he was certain the Commander was going to lose his patience. The man Cullen had knocked out at the tavern came to mind. And he could see that Cullen wasn’t eating either, which concerned him. “It is unfair for them to do this to him,” he said disapprovingly.

Varric spared another glance at the Commander, a frown tugging at his lips. He knew Cullen had enough on his plate as it was. Being offered up as bait, while brilliant, was probably going a step too far. “You know,” he drawled, “If you really wanted to chase that noble over there away for good, Buttercup would probably be all too happy to handle that for you.”

“Oh yes, let’s let Sera handle things,” Solas said dryly. Sometimes just even hearing her name could set him on edge. He rubbed at his temples, watching Cullen and the noble, and he could only imagine the sort of headache Cullen had to be developing. “I would rather keep her out of this.”

“Keep me outta what?”

Evie jumped and turned to see Sera standing there. “Shh!” she hushed the elf.

Sera giggled and hurried over to crouch behind Varric. “Why are we hidin’?” she asked, peering around the dwarf to see Cullen sitting at the table with a noble. “Ugh. What’s Cullen doing with that nob over there? I thought the two of you were havin’ it on.”

“He was sort of… forced into it,” Evie said, trying not to grit her teeth. She knew she shouldn’t do it, Leliana would have her head for it, but she didn’t know how much longer she could stand to sit there and watch poor Cullen like this. She hesitated for a minute, then turned to Sera, speaking in a hushed whisper. “Sera, I need you to do something for me. I need you to interrupt their lunch _without_ pissing off the noble. Can you do that?”

Sera wrinkled her nose. “Without pissin’ him off? Aww, but that’s no fun,” she pouted. A look of concentration crossed her features, then her eyes lit up. “Got it. I’ll be back,” she said, then scurried off to the kitchen.

“Evelyn,” Solas said in a warning voice, rubbing at his face. “This isn’t going to end well.”

“Hush.”

Varric chuckled and set down his quill, folding his arms on the table. “Chuckles is right, Inquisitor. This isn’t going to end well, but it’s going to get the job done. If she does well, you two won’t have to worry about Ruffles and Nightingale setting Curly up with any more suitors from the Winter Palace.”

“I don’t think anything Sera does is ever well done,” Solas deadpanned. A muscle ticked in his jaw as he watched Lord Alain reach over to touch Cullen’s hair, oblivious to the way the Commander tried to cringe away. It was pathetic, really, the way the noble tried to come on to Cullen so strongly, scooting his chair closer, touching him, complimenting him at every turn. At one point Solas thought Cullen was going to leap out of his seat when the noble pinched his bum.

Sera reappeared moments later, an impish little grin on her face, and a pie balanced carefully on one hand. Without hesitation, she strolled towards the Commander and the noble, throwing a wink over her shoulder at Evelyn.

“Oh Maker, Sera, noooo,” Evie said, pinching the bridge of her nose. This wasn’t what she had in mind.

“Hey Cullen!” Sera called loudly, drawing the attention of almost everyone in the Great Hall. The moment he turned in his chair, she threw the pie - _SPLAT -_ and hit him square in the face. She let out a shriek of laughter and ran for the doors, giggling like mad the whole way.

Cullen barely had time to close his eyes before the pie smashed into his face. A wave of annoyance and anger washed through him a second before he realized what just happened and he had to fight to keep the smile from growing on his face. He jumped up out of his seat, blessedly away from the grabby noble. “You’ll have to excuse me while I go change. I trust you know the way out, yes? It was, um, nice talking with you Stephen.”

* * *

 

“Point Cullen towards the Rotunda, okay?” Evie whispered to Varric, then grabbed Solas’ hand and dragged him away from the Great Hall. Amidst all the ruckus, it was easy enough to slip away unnoticed. Which was fortunate, because at that moment, Josephine entered the Great Hall and gasped in horror. Evie could still hear the Ambassador demanding to know what happened, even as she and Solas slipped into the Rotunda. “Oh, that was brilliant!”

Solas chuckled. “For once, I believe Sera’s antics were actually useful,” he said, an amused smile playing across his lips. “Though I imagine the Commander will spend the rest of his day attempting to scrub cream out of that mantle he wears.” He turned as he heard the door to the Rotunda, and his smile widened. “Did you at least enjoy your dessert?” he teased as Cullen walked in, still scraping pie from his face.

Cullen laughed as he flicked away part of the filling from his cheeks, a stray cherry from his nose. “Best pie I’ve ever had in my life,” he breathed and wiped his forehead, moving to lean against the scaffolding that was against the wall. “Maker, I didn’t think I was going to get away from him.” He shuddered, still feeling the lingering touches over his body. “He wouldn’t stop feeling me up. Sera saved that man’s life. I was moments away from punching that smug grin right off his face.”

“And no one could have blamed you,” Evie said moving closer to him and wiping a bit more of it from his face with her thumb. She could stop herself from laughing at the state of him; she didn’t think she’d ever seen the Commander quite so messy. She licked the pie filling from her thumb. “Mmm. Good pie,” she snickered. “I’m so sorry you had to endure that. Never again. If Josie or Leliana wants to woo a bunch of nobles, they can go on the dates themselves.”

“I have to say, I admire your restraint today,” Solas added, an amused smile still playing across his lips. He could still feel a lingering sort of jealousy, and that shook him. He wasn’t supposed to feel that sort of emotion towards Cullen. He pushed it from his mind, telling himself he could think on it later. “I am not so certain I could have kept as calm as you did in this situation.”

Cullen gave Solas a smile and nodded, looking down at Evie, feeling a flash of heat go through him as he watched her suck the pie off of her finger. He swallowed thickly before he coughed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Yes, well, I’d better go wash up. And hide until that thing leaves the grounds. Would you all like to join me for a real lunch? I lost my appetite with him.” He was curious, the look in Solas’s eyes was new and almost angry. It wasn’t towards himself though, was it possible that the other man was a little uncomfortable with him having that ‘date’?

“Aww, and here I was hoping you’d let me lick you clean,” Evie teased. Her eyes went wide the next moment and her face turned a furious red. “I mean… oh Maker, I didn’t mean it like that!” she cried, covering her face with both hands and bursting into a fit of giggles. She really hadn’t meant it in a sexual way, but it certainly sounded like that. “Go,” she gasped, still cringing and giggling, waving her arm at Cullen as if to shoo him away. “Just go. I’m going to crawl under Solas’ desk and die of embarrassment.”

Whether Evie’s or Cullen’s blush was more adorable, Solas wasn’t sure, and it made him laugh. He patted Evie on the back and looked to Cullen. “Go get cleaned up. We’ll join you in your office for lunch in a bit. Yes?”

If his face heated up any more, Cullen was certain it would catch fire and he nodded. “Yes, that sounds good.” He couldn’t get rid of the thought of Evelyn helping him clean up and suddenly his pants were about ten sizes too small for his liking. Especially not with the predatory way both seemed to be looking at him. He swallowed thinking of Solas’s gaze on him and he quickly turned and headed for his office. “I’ll see you both in a little bit,” he got out before he left, seriously considering jumping into a snow drift.


	11. Chapter 11

It was just a short time later that Evie knocked on the door to Cullen’s office, sticking her head in and grinning at him. “Aww, and here I was hoping we’d catch you in the middle of cleaning up,” she teased, snickering when she saw the blush instantly reappear on his face. She let herself and Solas into the office, bringing plates of food with them. “Sorry, I have to pass along the teasing. He hasn’t stopped since I made that comment about licking you clean,” she said, thumbing over her shoulder at Solas. “So, are you ready for a meal you can actually enjoy?”

Cullen rubbed at his face, but was unable to stop the smile that appeared on his lips. Already his mood was greatly improved and he nodded. “Already the company is much more desirable than before,” he murmured and moved to his desk, clearing it off so they could set the food down. “I suppose I am going to need to bring in an actual table or something,” he said, looking around and rubbing the back of his neck, “It is rather sparse in here. Not ideal for entertaining company.”

“Desirable?” Evie asked, pursing her lips and waggling her eyebrows suggestively. “Did you hear that, Solas? We’re desirable.”

Solas snickered, but shook his head. “Enough, Evie. Poor Cullen has endured enough for one day,” he lightly scolded as he set the plates down on the desk. “This is plenty ideal for just us,” he reassured Cullen, and pulled over a couple extra chairs for himself and Evie. “Hopefully you won’t have to deal with such a thing again. If Josephine realizes what a true waste of time that was, perhaps she will not allow it again. One can hope, anyway.”

Evie sobered herself a bit as she sat down. “I am sorry about the pie,” she said. “But I just couldn’t stand to watch anymore. Seeing that noble lord whoever putting his hands on you…” She stopped and looked down at her food, feeling the jealousy all over again. She clenched her jaw and gave her head a sharp shake. “I didn’t like that. At all.”

Cullen gave a shudder as he was reminded and he nodded. “Don’t worry yourself over it. The way it was going, I was more than happy to be hit in the face with a pie. It was certainly better than the alternative,” he said as he sat down at his desk, rather liking the much more intimate setting with the both of them. He smirked at the thought, he didn’t think he would be so comfortable about it. 

“It would seem our dear Inquisitor was rather jealous about the whole thing,” Solas said with a teasing little smirk as he ate. “Not that I could blame her; it was improper the way he tried to put his hands all over you, especially on a first meeting.” He wrinkled his nose at the thought. “What a foolish, self-centered child that noble was.” He shook his head and took another bite. “In other news, Varric thinks we’ve all officially lost our minds, endorsing Sera’s behavior like that. And using him as a shield to spy,” he said, shooting a look at Evelyn, who cringed and giggled.

“Hey, look on the bright side. That’s almost guaranteed to make it into one of his novels!” she said brightly, taking a bite of her lunch and beaming at Cullen. 

“Maker help me,” Cullen said as he ran a hand through his hair and leaned heavily against his desk as he ate. His headache was slowly starting to fade, finally. “And what did Varric think about the both of you inquiring after me and my ill gotten date?” He looked between both of them, he knew he had just barely gotten used to the idea of the three of them as involved with each other, but he wasn’t certain he wanted everyone else in the Inquisition to be aware of their unique situation.

“He was mostly interested for ‘literary purposes’ from what I understood,” Solas answered. He decided to leave out the bit where Varric accused him of being jealous of Cullen’s date. He wasn’t even entirely sure that was what he’d felt. Though he had felt something. “It was his suggestion to use Sera’s expertise to rescue you. I admit, it is one of the few times she has proven her usefulness.”

“You’re too hard on her,” Evie said. “I happen to think she’s brilliant.” She paused, seeing Cullen wince and rub at his forehead again. “Another headache?” she asked softly, knowing he got them often either from stress or lyrium withdrawal. Either way, it bothered her to see him in pain. She set her fork aside and got to her feet, walking around the desk to stand behind him. “Let me help,” she said, summoning a bit of frost to her fingertips, then sank her fingers into his hair, massaging at his scalp.

Cullen started when she slid her fingers into his hair, the hint of magic making him nervous for a moment before he let out a soft groan as her cool fingers pressed into his skin. “Oh Maker, that feels good,” he sighed out, letting his head fall forward. The cold seemed to seep in deeper, numbing the nerves that were screaming out in pain, either from his withdrawals or from the lunch incident. He hummed his appreciation. 

Evie smiled at the soft sound from Cullen’s throat and she pressed her thumbs against the back of his skull, working them down to his neck, then back up again. She twirled her fingertips around his temples, then soothed them across his cheekbones. Her heart beat a little faster as he tilted his head back and she rubbed behind his ears, trying to relieve any pain he might’ve felt. It would’ve been so easy to bend down a bit and kiss him. She chanced a glance at Solas, who watched them with interest, but didn’t seem bothered. She licked her lips and looked back down at Cullen, drawing her thumb across the scar above his lip, her heart racing even faster. “Cullen,” she murmured softly and dipped her head, pressing her lips to his.

Cullen’s eyes fell closed as she dipped down, pressing their lips together. His heart pounded and he couldn’t even begin to describe the happiness that filled him. He gave a groan and reached up, cupping the back of her head as she teased her tongue against his lips and he eagerly parted them for her, moaning out at the sweetness that he tasted. He may have not been sure about many things, but this… he could get used to this.

Evelyn lost herself in that kiss, tangling her tongue with his as a hazy buzz seemed to fill her ears. His lips were firm and warm, the stubble on his face scratching at her chin. She slid her hands to cup his face more, moaning softly at the feel of his fingers in her hair. Maker, it was everything she’d ever dreamed it could be.

It surprised Solas to find that he didn’t feel that spark of jealousy as he watched the two of them kiss. He watched them intently, the way their mouths seemed to meld together, how they held each other. And it somehow only increased the affection he felt. He bit the inside of his cheek when he heard their moans, and he shifted in his chair, adjusting the leg of his pants. He mentally scolded himself for getting turned on by this. Okay, so perhaps he was a little jealous that he wasn’t the one being kissed, but not the bad kind of jealousy. Well, at least it made sense in his own mind. He sat back in his chair, quietly studying them, his heartbeat picking up at the display.

Cullen was breathing hard when they finally pulled away and he felt his blood singing in his veins, his lips tingling pleasantly  and he slowly opened his eyes, smiling warmly at her. “That was really nice,” he said quietly, studying her flushed face, certain that it matched his own. He glanced over at Solas, nearly surprised at the intense look on the elf’s face, the way his eyes were so dark the way his pupils were blown wide. He looked back up at Evie, smile still in place. “But I think Solas is feeling left out.”

Evie’s heart leapt at Cullen’s words. Was he actually encouraging her to kiss Solas as well? This was so different than where they had started out, she didn’t know what to think. She pressed a kiss to Cullen’s forehead, then looked over at the elf, an almost predatory gleam in her eyes. She locked gazes with him as she moved slowly around the desk, going to stand before him, and she reached out to touch his face. By the Maker, she loved that intense look in his eyes.

Solas reached for Evelyn, grabbing her by the waist, and pulled her to straddle his lap as he leaned up and captured her lips with his own. His heart sang, his pulse racing as she tilted her head, their tongues meeting. Something in the back of his mind nagged at him that he’d let himself get too close this time, that he cared too much, but it was too late to turn back now. He gripped her hips a little harder, pulling her down against his growing hardness, and nearly smirked when he heard her moan and felt her rock herself against him as she kissed him needfully.

Cullen swallowed hard as he watched the display, how confidently Solas moved around her, with her. The way his long fingers bunched into the back of her shirt and how he seemed to devour her. He licked his lips, his own cock giving an interested twitch as he shifted around. Okay. So maybe this idea had some merit to it. Heat pooled in his lower stomach as he just watched, Evelyn wrapping herself around the other man securely. Maker, it should be a sin to be that good of a kisser.

Evelyn’s core throbbed as she felt Solas’ hard length press up against her. Maker, what she wouldn’t give to tear their clothes away and just sink down onto that hardness, riding him in that chair, right there in the office with Cullen watching. To invite the Commander over to join them, to feel him inside her as well. She kissed Solas with a burning passion, rocking her hips against him, shivering when he moaned beneath her.

“Commander Cullen, Ser…”

Evelyn gasped and quickly slid out of Solas’ lap when the messenger’s voice met her ears. Her lips were swollen and throbbing, her hair slightly a mess, and it was as if she couldn’t breathe. She felt her face turn red and she moved quickly, turning away from the messenger as if she’d been caught doing something she shouldn’t have.

Cullen started, foolishly dropping his hands to his lap in an attempt to cover the rather prominent bulge there. Oh he should not have been as interested in this situation with Evelyn and Solas. Still, he inwardly groaned and glared over at the messenger. “What!” he growled out, but then his eyes widened a moment later when he recognized the courier as one of Leliana’s agents. “You tell her I had nothing to do with getting a pie thrown in my face and I refuse to go back out there and finish that insult of a lunch date with that puffed up, grabby noble!”

The messenger blinked in surprise, looking from Solas to the Inquisitor, then back to the Commander. “I… don’t know anything about a lunch date, Ser,” he said nervously. He cleared his throat and his professionalism returned. “Sister Leliana asked me to bring this to you. News of Adamant,” he said, handing over the sealed letter. He pulled a second one and offered it to Evelyn as well, then ducked out of Cullen’s office, closing the door firmly behind him.

Evie let out a heavy breath, her face burning red. Of all the damn times for one of Leliana’s people to come strolling through the door. She exchanged a look with Solas, who looked just as flustered as she and Cullen did, then she turned her attention to the letter in her hand. “What is this? It can’t possibly be that important,” she muttered, the irritation apparent in her voice.

Cullen cursed under his breath and tore open the letter. “We’ve been waiting to hear back from Hawke and his warden ally. I’m guessing this is what they’ve found out about the fortress. If it isn’t, I’m going to go to Leliana and give her a piece of my mind about her agents and knocking,” he angrily muttered, looking over at the two of them and felt his blush return tenfold. He was half tempted to toss the letter out the window and continue whatever it was that was happening between them all. Curiosity won over and he read the letter, a cold chill creeping up his spine. “Maker’s breath. Word from Hawke. He says the Grey Wardens are going to be summoning the demon army. That they are working up to something and it’s going to be big.”

Evie crumpled the paper in her hand, cursing her luck. Just as things were really starting to go well for her and Solas and Cullen, this had to happen. “Damn it all,” she muttered under her breath, smoothing out the letter again, and stuffed it into her pocket. “We have to act quickly,” she said, wishing that at that moment that she was not the Inquisitor, that the men with her weren’t so needed to help stop the end of the world. That somehow they could all just go hide away and keep exploring whatever had been about to happen. She turned to Solas, but he had already risen from his chair, his expression arranged calmly, just as always.  _ ‘How does he do that?!’ _

“We will stop them,” Solas promised, though he could feel the irritation coursing through him. And alongside it, he could feel the lust, the curiosity, the excitement of what had been happening still singing through his veins as well. Curse his luck. Still, he didn’t let it show, in any sort of way, and he turned to face both of them, waiting expectantly.

Cullen stared at Solas a moment as he had composed himself rather quickly and rubbed at his face with his hands, trying to get a hold of his own body. He sighed and looked back at the two of them. “Let’s get to it then, the sooner we deal with the Grey Wardens, the sooner we can put a stop to Corypheus once and for all. Then, maybe if the Maker is willing, no more interruptions,” he muttered and rubbed the back of his neck, “That was, um, very nice. Surprisingly. I would even go so far as to say that I’m looking forward to our return. However selfish that may be.”

A smile spread across Evelyn’s lips and she nodded. “Me too,” she said, a relief filling her. Even though the moment may have been interrupted, neither of the men seemed as though it had frightened them away from what might have happened. She crossed the room and planted a quick but firm kiss on Cullen’s lips. “It isn’t selfish. And we will return as soon as we can.” 

“Let us hurry then,” Solas said. “I too look forward to some time alone with you when this is over.” He looked between Evie and Cullen, his heart hammering in his chest as he thought about it. Something in the back of his mind told him to shut up, to not say it, and yet he couldn’t stop himself. “Both of you.”


	12. Chapter 12

The battle at Adamant was probably the most intense battle the Inquisition had faced thus far. Even in all his explorations of the Fade, Solas couldn’t recall seeing so many demons at once. 

The Inquisitor had taken Dorian, Bull, and Cassandra with her as her party for this particular battle, and Solas had agreed to stay and fight with the Inquisition forces. Though he kept his distance, he stayed somewhat close to Cullen during the fight. If something happened, he wanted to be close by. Though he didn’t know how much help he could be if something threatened Cullen that the Commander couldn’t handle. Solas had already gone though his supply of healing potions in this fight. 

He twirled his staff, his limbs aching from fighting for so long, and aimed another spell at a demon stalking towards him. Blast it all, where had the Inquisitor gone? And what had happened with the dragon, the crumbling bridge? He hoped with all of his might that no member of the Inquisition had been on it when it fell. He turned, seeing Cullen fighting off a demon as another came towards him. “Cullen!” he called in warning and fired an ice spell, freezing both demons in their place. 

Cullen whirled around at the shout he heard, raising his shield just in time to block what would have been a fatal blow to his head by another fear demon. With a roar, he sliced off the monster’s head before he turned around and stabbed another one that came at him. Maker, the voices in his head were the worst. The little whispers of all of his fears, desires, and anger all hammering him at once. “A bloody demon army. These Wardens need to be shaken good.”

“We agree again, Commander,” Solas called out, though he wasn’t certain if Cullen heard him or not. The din of battle nearly drowned out any other possible sound. Everywhere he looked was utter chaos, and the demons just seemed to keep coming from nowhere. He backed up as more came at him, and he set his features determinedly as he threw spell after spell at them. Movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention and he turned just in time to freeze another demon in its tracks. But behind it, he could see Cullen, and the swarm of demons around the man. It seemed as if they were drawn to him, and Solas now knew why. 

There were far too many for the Commander to handle all at once. Solas finished off one more demon, then ran, his only thought of stopping the horde around Cullen. He jumped into the fray, back to back with the other man, firing off as many spells as quickly as he could conjure them. His heart stopped when he heard Cullen shout in pain and he turned to see him falling to his knees. 

“NO!” he cried, leaping in front of Cullen and viciously attacking the demon that had been about to deal the finishing blow. With a last burst of his energy, he drew down bolts of lightning, striking the demons around them. He leaned over, panting for just a moment before he turned to look at his fallen friend. “Cullen!” he gasped and dropped to his knees. 

The inside of the Commander’s left thigh had been torn open by the demon’s claws, leaving him bleeding upon the ground. “Fenedhis,” Solas cursed and pulled off his tunic, wrapping it tightly around Cullen’s leg.

Cullen screwed his eyes shut. “Damn thing crawled out of the the ground right under me. I didn’t see it coming,” he breathed, his entire body was shaking. He felt a coldness wash over him as he looked down to see the blood starting to soak through the mage’s tunic. He felt nauseated and tears welled up in his eyes as he sank back on the ground. “Cursed thing must have nicked an artery.”

Solas pressed the makeshift bandage harder against Cullen’s leg, trying to stop the bleeding. “You’re going to be alright,” he said firmly, wishing with everything that he was that he’d had one last healing potion on him. “Your potions! Do you have any healing potions left? We can at least stop the bleeding, get you back to the healers.” He didn’t like the way Cullen was beginning to shake, how quickly the blood was soaking through the fabric.

Cullen swallowed thickly, blinking his eyes up at Solas as his vision tried to blur on him. The coldness was spreading from his leg, seeping upwards. He knew he would bleed out if they tried to move him to the healers. “G-gave my last one… to a recruit… with a broken arm,” he gasped out and managed a watery laugh, “That just figures. I finally have the chance at happiness and this bloody happens.” He closed his eyes, feeling the tears sliding down his cheeks. “Promise me you’ll take care of her. That you’ll be there for her.”

“No,” Solas said with a shake of his head. “I will not promise you that. You are going to be with us when we go back to Skyhold.” He felt his eyes beginning to burn and he blinked, keeping a determined look on his face. “You are not going to die here today. I will not let you, lethallin,” he said, a desperation in his voice. “She will never forgive either of us if you die.” He could feel his heart breaking as Cullen’s face became paler, his breathing shaky. He grit his teeth, trying to will some healing through his hands that held the bandage around the wound, but he was exhausted and there wasn’t much he could do. “Do not leave us,” he begged, his voice a hoarse whisper.

Tears flowed more freely down Cullen’s face as he listened to Solas speak. He had a wonderful voice and he imagined that he could listen to him for hours, speaking about what he knew best. He fumbled with his hand, reaching down and covered Solas’s. His fingers were starting to go numb and he knew he didn’t have to look down to see the tunic soaked through. “You said that again,” he murmured, “Lethallin. I’m not certain if I deserve the honor.”

“You do,” Solas insisted, a knot forming in his throat to feel how cold Cullen’s hand was upon his own. No, he could not just sit here and let his friend die. Not like this. “You stay with me, Cullen,” he said, shifting closer to the other man, meeting his eyes with an intensity burning in his own. “I have you. You’re not going to die. Not today. Now stay with me.” He looked up, calling out for help, shouting that the Commander was hurt. “I have you,” he repeated, fighting the tears that threatened to fall.

There was a lag in the sound of the fighting by divine influence or perhaps just dumb luck, Varric was going to go with that one, that allowed him to hear the frantic cry from Solas. he fired off another bolt at an incoming demon before he whirled around, his eyes scanning the hordes of demons and Inquisition soldiers before he spotted the mage and the Commander. “Shit!” he cursed when he saw the wound, even from this distance. He ran, as fast as a dwarf with short legs could, jumping over crumbled bodies and broken stones. A hand went to his potion’s belt and he palmed the last health potion he had. “Chuckles!” he called out.

Solas turned sharply and nearly sobbed with relief when he saw Varric. He snatched the bottle out of the dwarf’s hand and popped it open, tilting it to Cullen’s ash-colored lips. “Drink,” he commanded softly. He could see the life trying to leave Cullen’s eyes and it frightened him. “Swallow it down. You’re not leaving us today,” he said softly but firmly. Solas himself was shaking, knowing Cullen wasn’t completely out of the woods yet. They’d come damn close to losing him. He squeezed his eyes shut as Cullen swallowed the potion. “We cannot linger here,” he said as he scanned the battlefield. “Varric, help me move him.”

Varric nodded, slipping his crossbow into the holster on his back before he knelt down to help Solas stand the man up. “Nice and easy, Curly,” he said, wincing at the tunic, completely saturated in the Commander’s blood, “Shit, hope you got that thing back.” He looked around, holding onto the human tightly. “Fuck, let’s hope he can last to make it back to the healers. Last I saw they were clustered around the entrance to this nightmare.” He didn’t like the way Cullen’s head had fallen forward, his eyes drifting shut. “Hey, stay awake now. No time for sleeping. Sleep later.”

Solas was glad Varric was there, not only to help carry Cullen, but to keep talking, to keep them focused. He didn’t think he himself was capable of that at this moment, he was so physically and emotionally exhausted. The fighting seemed to be dying down a bit, though he couldn’t tell whose side had won at that point. And to tell the truth, he didn’t much care at the moment. All he cared about was that Cullen and Evie make it through the battle alive. “There!” he finally said, seeing some of their people standing near the entrance to the fortress. His hope renewed, he walked a little faster, pulling Cullen along. “Help!” he called out as they got closer. “The Commander’s been injured!” 

Two of the healers rushed over to take Cullen and help him lay down, and Solas recognized one of them as part of Bull’s Chargers. He remembered Bull bragging on the man, how talented a healer the man they called “Stitches” was. He silently prayed that Bull had not been overexaggerating.

Stitches unwound the makeshift bandage from around the Commander’s leg, and pulled a face, but quickly set to work. He poured clear water over the wound, cleaning it as best he could, then opened a small jar of salve mixed with herbs. “Apologies, Commander. This is going to sting like a hive of angry bees, but it’ll heal you up in no time,” he said and spread the poultice over the wound. 

If he had been dozing before, the poultice quickly fixed that and he cried out as it felt like his entire leg was on fire. He bit it back before it became a scream and he clenched his fists tightly as he weakly fell back on the cot. “Sweet Andraste, preserve me,” he grit out before he turned his head, eyes locking onto Solas, “I don’t want to die. The pain…” He bit his lip so hard he tasted blood and he closed his eyes, “Pain is good.”

Without hesitation, Solas dropped to his knees next to the cot and grabbed Cullen’s hand. “It is good,” he said with a slight laugh, though it came out a bit more emotional sounding than he would’ve liked. “It lets you know you’re alive.” He squeezed Cullen’s hand, both of them still covered in blood. “And you are very much alive. We will go home soon. All three of us,” he promised. Damn, how he wished Evie was there with them. He looked around, though there was no sign of her at the moment. 

“It’s a good thing you got him here when you did,” Stitches said as he dressed the wound with proper bandages. “And a good thing your friend there had a healing potion on him. The Commander wouldn’t have lasted long without you two and your quick thinking.” He uncorked another healing potion and pulled the Commander to sit up slightly, tipping the bottle to his lips. “Drink that, and I think you’ll pull through. You’ll be tired and weak for a bit, but you’ll be fine.”

Cullen made a face as he drank the potion down, he had never been fond of the taste of elfroot. The pain dulled a little as the potion warmed in his stomach and he felt the exhaustion set in. He felt incredibly weak and his eyes felt heavy, but he held tightly onto Solas’s hands. They were keeping him grounded. He turned his head, looking up at the elf. “Don’t leave…” he murmured. “The Inquisitor,” He started, his eyes opening a little wider before he looked around again, “Should find her.”

“I won’t leave you,” Solas promised, his voice quiet, and a small smile touched his lips. “If I know her, she will find us.” He could see the smallest hint of color coming back into Cullen’s face. He grasped his hands, but he could feel how weak Cullen’s grip was. Hopefully the trip back to Skyhold would be swift and they would be given a small reprieve. “Rest now. All will be well.”

* * *

 

Evie raced as fast as she could towards the entrance to Adamant. The Wardens had been dealt with, her mind was reeling from everything that had happened. Entering the Fade, all the information and memories recovered there, the death of Warden Stroud. But she pushed all of that to the back of her mind. There was something far more urgent that needed her attention; she’d been told Cullen was horribly injured. 

She let out a cry when she saw them, Cullen laying on a cot with bandages wrapped around his leg, Solas shirtless and holding Cullen’s hand, both of them covered in blood. She fell to her knees as she neared them, skidding a bit, and she looked them both over. “Oh Maker,” she gasped, her voice breaking, tears forming in her eyes. “How did this happen? I… oh…” She choked up and couldn’t say anything else, fear crashing through her as she realized how close she’d been to losing him.

Cullen blinked himself awake, looking over to Evie, a tired smile pulling at his lips. “You were right… she found us.” He swallowed, licking at his dried lips. “Maker, we must look quite the pair,” he said quietly and reached toward her with his free hand. “Thank Andraste you are alright, Evie. The demons tried their best to get us, but Solas and Varric saved the day.”

Varric wasn’t entirely certain what he was looking at here, but it felt like he was intruding. Something was definitely going on between the three of them and wasn’t sure what to make of it. He did an elaborate bow. “Just another humble servant to the Inquisition, Curly. Lucky I was in the right place at the right time or this would have turned out a little different.” He looked back to the Evie, “I think I’ll go check on the others. Can’t imagine everyone walked out of that without a scratch to show for it.”

Evie squeezed Cullen’s hand, not wanting to part from him, but she turned and flung her arms around Varric in a tight hug. She couldn’t let him walk away without thanking him. “Thank you for saving him,” she whispered before she went back to Cullen’s side, grabbing up his hand again. “Thank the Maker you’re going to be okay,” she whispered, leaning over to press a kiss to his forehead. She wanted to kiss him more than that, but she was aware of the eyes on them and she refrained. “We’re going to go home. We’ve stopped Corypheus, at least for now.” She reached out and threaded her fingers through his hair, then turned and looked at Solas. “Don’t you go getting hurt next.”

Solas chuckled, relieved to see her alive and well. “I don’t intend to. Someone has to watch over the two of you,” he said, though he instantly realized he’d said it a little loud and the tips of his ears burned. He gripped Evie’s other hand with his hand, feeling as though there was a connection there, a bond that seemed to be growing more and more by the minute. He never thought he would have this with anyone, especially not two humans, and that very thought alone left him reeling. “I’ll arrange for a wagon to take us back,” he said, knowing that Cullen very well couldn’t ride his horse back. 

Cullen nodded, letting his hand fall back to his chest as Solas left them before he looked over to Evie. “I didn’t mean to scare you both so. Believe me when I say it was not my intention.” He chuckled wearily. “I’m so tired. And I think I’ve had my fill of demons and blood magic enough to last me a few life times over.” He ran his thumb over her knuckles, watching her, the tears on her face. “Shh, enough of that now.” 

She leaned into his touch, sniffling a bit and trying to calm herself. “Can’t help it,” she whispered. “Almost losing you… it frightens me.” She drew a deep breath and let it out slowly, finally stopping her tears, and she met his eyes. “You need to rest,” she said softly. “Even after we get back to Skyhold. I know it kills you to sit still for five minutes, but I don’t care. When we get back, you’re going to rest and let me take care of you. Even if I have to tie you to the bed.” She paused, feeling a heat touch her face, and she snorted with a nervous laugh. “You know what I mean.”

He nearly snorted at that and nodded. “I doubt, at this rate, you will hardly have to twist my arm. Sleeping for a week sounds like the best plan I’ve ever heard. Perhaps a bath first. I can’t stand this. I can still feel the demons, clawing all over me, whispering in my mind.” He closed his eyes and shook his head, remembering the images he had been shown. Fears that he didn’t understand with both Evie and Solas. Betrayal. Pain and suffering. “The moment is over. Thank the Maker.”

“Hush now,” she said softly as she saw Solas walking back towards them. A smile pulled at her lips and she looked down at Cullen again. “Try not to think about it. It’s over. We’re going home now.”


	13. Chapter 13

The road back to Skyhold was a long and bumpy one. More than once, Evelyn hissed at their wagon driver to take it slow, worrying that Cullen was being jostled too much. Solas found it endearing, the way she fussed over Cullen, though really the danger had passed at this point. The Commander’s leg would be mostly healed by the time they got back to Skyhold, thanks to Stitches’ good work. Now it was just a matter of the exhaustion he felt.

“You’ll never make it up that ladder to your room,” he told Cullen when they finally crossed the bridge into Skyhold and the wagon came to a stop. “You’ll collapse of exhaustion before you even make it half-way up.” He jumped lightly out of the wagon and turned to open the back of it, then reached out his hands in offering to help Evie and Cullen down.

Cullen chuckled tiredly as he accepted Solas’s hand to shakily get down from the back of the wagon. Maker, but he was exhausted. “Thanks for the vote of confidence,” he teased, but he knew the elf spoke the truth. While his leg was mostly healed, it still stung and there was the matter of fatigue that he felt. There was no way he would be able to pull himself up the ladder until he was more well rested. “It’s fine. I can sleep on the floor of my office. I’ve slept in worse places, believe me.” 

“I’ll be damned if I let you sleep on the floor,” Evelyn gasped as she hopped down from the wagon and ducked under Cullen’s arm, helping him to walk. Solas took Cullen’s other arm and together they headed for the Great Hall. “You’ll sleep in my room tonight. And if you argue, I’ll tell Leliana that you’ve reconsidered and would like to have many more luncheons with nobles from Orlais.” She shot him a look of warning, as if daring him to argue with her.

The Commander blinked as he suddenly found himself flanked by the two of them and he smiled tiredly at the both of them. “Kidnapping and threatening me at the same time.” He shook his head and looked to Solas. “We will have to stay on our toes with her,” he said before he winced as they started going up the stairs. “Maker, that’s assuming you can even get me up all the bloody stairs. Who built this castle? I want to have a word with them about that,” he murmured and let himself be helped into the Great Hall, heading towards the Inquisitor’s rooms at the far end.

“I’m afraid that’s impossible. Unless you would like to have a discussion with Dorian about time magic and the like. This fortress was built so long ago that it’s builders have long been forgotten,” Solas answered. A yawn split his face as they finally reached the door to Evie’s quarters, and he opened the door for them. He knew he wasn’t as exhausted as Cullen, but he was damn close. And he knew Evie was as well, he could see it in her eyes.

Evie was cursing the stairs by the time they got to the top, and a relieved sigh escaped her when she saw the large metal bathtub set up in her room, the steam curling up from the hot water that filled it. “Oh good. They got the message I sent on ahead,” she said, finally coming to a stop. She carefully ducked out from under Cullen’s arm, taking a moment to make sure he was steady on his feet. “We can all get cleaned up and then we can sleep. For, like, ever.”

“Sounds utterly divine,” Cullen said sleepily as he looked around the room. Someone had gotten the fireplace going and the bath looked absolutely sinful. He could feel the grime and blood on himself and he itched to wash it away. He felt a heat rise to his cheeks and he looked at Evie as he leaned heavily on Solas. “You can have the first go at it, if you like.” He hesitated, his heart speeding up as he looked at them both. After his near brush with death, he wasn’t too keen on the idea of parting from them, even if for a moment. 

“No,” Evie said softly. “You need to get laid down. You get cleaned up first, and then you get in that bed,” she ordered, moving to start unbuckling his armor for him. All three of them smelled of sweat and blood, and she imagined that the two of them felt even more gross than she herself did. “I won’t see you collapse while I’m taking a bath. Solas, help me get this stuff off of him.”

Solas hesitated for a moment, unsure if Cullen would be comfortable with that, but then he realized the Commander would never manage it on his own. It wouldn’t bother Solas to see the other man naked; how many times had he and other members of the Inquisition had to bathe together while out on the road in rivers and such? Still, he moved cautiously as if trying not to startle Cullen by helping him undress. “She’s right. You should go first,” he said as he helped lift the heavy armor up and over Cullen’s head.

Cullen gave a little laugh as he let them undress him. He found he was just too tired to really care about something like modesty. Joining the Templar order, they had to share the bathing area so it was nothing he hadn’t done before. However, he supposed the difference was the way he felt for the two helping him strip down. He found that, surprisingly, he didn’t mind. His pants were ruined beyond all hope and he shook his head as he let them help him into the hot water with a sigh. “I think you could toss most of that into the fire,” he muttered, the hot water sinking deeply into his sore muscles. 

Oh how Evelyn wanted to be professional about this, but seeing the Commander’s naked form in her room set a fire low in her belly and it was all she could do to stop herself from whimpering. She moved to sit on her knees next to the tub, picking up a clean washcloth, and began to scrub at the back of his shoulders. She watched as Solas took the pieces of clothing that were ruined and burned them, setting aside the others to be washed. “At least your cloak is salvageable,” she muttered. “I don’t think I’d recognize you without it.” She moved to rest her forehead against his temple, letting her lips brush his ear. “I’m so happy we’re back here,” she murmured. “All three of us.”

Cullen nodded, softly groaning as she scrubbed at him and he took the soap she offered to him so he could scrub everything that was under the water. “Mmm, if you aren’t careful, you’ll put me to sleep and then where will you two be?” he said, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips and he cupped his hands together in the water, pouring some over his head so he could scrub his hair clean as well. The hot water made his eyelids droop and he felt that it was a shame. Such an important step for them all, and he could barely stay awake. 

Solas stood by the fire, a small smile on his lips as he watched the two of them. How he had come to care so deeply for two humans like this, he would never know. And what it meant for his plans, his future, was an even bigger question. One that he really didn’t want to answer at this particular moment. It was so easy to pretend that the outside world didn’t exist when they were together like this, hidden away in Evie’s room. Eventually, he would have to address it. Address the fact of who he was, of what he was, that all of this was his fault. That he didn’t deserve to share in their happiness. 

He bowed his head slightly, squeezing his eyes shut. It made his heart ache to keep his secret from them. From both of them. He should walk away, now, before anyone got truly hurt. They were too close to it now, whatever it was that this relationship was becoming, and he knew that this was the last chance to stop it. And he couldn’t bring himself to do it. 

He looked up again when he heard Cullen climbing out of the tub, and he grabbed a towel and crossed the room to offer it to him. “Go ahead, Evie,” he said. “I’ll help Cullen to the bed.”

She almost cursed how quickly Solas had brought the towel over. She’d wanted to admire the Commander, standing there naked while the droplets of water trickled down his skin, following the cut lines of his muscles. Even now, she was mesmerized by it, and somehow the towel around his waist only left more to the imagination. She bit her lip and turned away to start stripping away her own clothing, thinking about how amazing it would feel to crawl into her soft feather bed after soaking in that bath.

Cullen let Solas help him over to the bed, which was absolutely sinful. He groaned as he sank back, slipping under the warm sheets. He forced himself to sit up as he towled at his hair, his eyes catching with the elf’s. He wondered how he had gotten into this situation. He remembered before, his experiences at Kinloch and Kirkwall, the distrust and hate he used to have for mages. Now here he was, two of them so very close to his heart. “You look concerned, Solas,” he observed, the crease between the elf’s brow was a little prominent.

Solas realized he’d let himself get too lost in thought and he immediately relaxed his expression. “Simply reflecting on everything that happened at Adamant,” he lied smoothly, though he hated to do it. He was tired of lying, especially to them. “My apologies,” he murmured, his eyes flickering over to Evelyn as she finished undressing. His breath caught in his throat at how beautiful she was, and he had to clear his throat, turning slightly away from the both of them so he could regain control of his body. 

Oh, the hot water felt amazing. Evelyn moaned low in her throat as she sank into it, feeling it already washing away the dirt and grime that covered her. She didn’t know what she wanted more, to soak in that hot bath until she shriveled up like a prune, or to wash quickly so she could go crawl into bed and sleep next to Cullen. And hopefully Solas. Maker, that would be the best feeling in the world right now. She smiled over at the two men, Cullen propping himself up in the bed and Solas standing nearby. It made her heart skip to see the two of them there with her. She never in her wildest dreams would’ve believed that they would all three come to this point.

“Excuse me a moment,” Solas said to Cullen and crossed the room to Evie, kneeling behind the tub to undo the braids that kept her hair out of her face. It took all of his willpower not to nibble at her skin, to keep his hands from roaming over her. Even though he was exhausted and knew they were too, it was still so tempting. He finally combed his fingers through her hair and he looked over to see Cullen watching them. A heat pooled low in his belly as he thought about what might happen once they’d had a chance to rest, if he stayed in that room with them that night. He dipped his hands into the water, bringing it up to cascade over her shoulders, watching it trickle down her collarbones. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered in her ear.

A gasp escaped Evie’s lips as she felt Solas’ warm breath on her ear, the brush of his lips, the warm water trickling down her skin. Maker help her. She turned and captured his lips with her own, another soft moan working its way up from her throat. She raised up slightly out of the water to kiss him better, aware of the way the cooler air of the room hit her breasts and made her nipples pebble. Oh to hell with sleep, they could rest later, couldn’t they?

Cullen’s eyes widened a fair bit as he watched them, listening to Evie’s breathy moans, the splash of water and the quiet murmur of Solas’s rich voice. Maker’s breath, this wasn’t fair and he couldn’t stop the whimper that passed his lips as he watched them both. He reclined back as he watched them, wishing in that moment that he wasn’t as exhausted as he felt. He let his eyes drift over Evie’s curves and Solas’s broader frame. Maker, those fingers though, long and thin, cupping Evelyn’s shoulders so carefully. 

A smirk touched Solas’ lips as he finally pulled away from Evie, his eyes drinking in the redness of her lips, the dreamy look in her eyes. “I shouldn’t have,” he said softly as she sank back into the water. “It is not fair to get you worked up when we are all so tired.” He moved her to lay back in the water, wetting her hair so he could wash it for her. “Just a taste of what is to come,” he said.

“You’re naughty,” she teased as she leaned back into the fingers massaging her scalp, working the lightly scented soap through the long pale strands. Her core ached with need, throbbing in the hot water, and for a moment she was tempted to touch herself. Damn it all. She bit her lip as she laid back in the water, finally rinsing away the soap, and she stood up to step out of the tub. She met Solas’ burning gaze with one of her own, not even attempting to cover herself. Two could play at this game.

Now who was the one teasing? Solas felt his breath catch in his throat to see her fully bared to them, her shoulders squared and proud, the water droplets tracing her curves. He longed to lean forward and taste her skin, to trail his tongue over the paths of water that glistened in the firelight. His cock strained against his pants, throbbing and needful. He bit his lip as he picked up a towel and moved to stand behind her, drying her hair before he worked the soft cloth over her body. He lowered his head to the side of her neck, nibbling at her warm skin as he ran the towel down her back, over her rear.

Another gasp escaped her as she let Solas dry her off, feeling his hot mouth against her neck. It only made her want him all the more and she felt her knees go weak. Her gaze locked with Cullen’s as she let Solas move the towel over her breasts and she drew a sharp breath to feel his fingers cup her through the cloth, kneading her flesh, lingering there far longer than was necessary.

Cullen couldn’t deny it any more as his length twitched beneath the covers. It was the oddest of sensations, to be completely aroused and exhausted at the same time. He swallowed thickly, feeling a yearning to be over there with them, to help Solas please Evelyn. He clenched at the sheets a moment before he pressed a hand to the bulge beneath the covers, drawing a sharp hiss through his teeth as he leaned back against the headboard. Maker, he could see the way Solas’s erection strained against his already tight pants and another gasp made it out of him as he remembered Evelyn grinding down on it that day in his office.

Solas slowly lowered himself to his knees, kissing his way down her arm as he continued to dry her body. Oh, he was torturing himself as well. He ever so slowly trailed the towel down her legs, then back up, squeezing at the inside of her thigh. He could almost feel the heat of her body against his hand and it made him groan. He finally forced himself to pull away before he took things too far, if he hadn’t already. “Go lay down,” he said softly to her. 

She turned to him, feeling breathless. “Will you join us?”

This was it, the last chance to walk away, Solas knew it. He should’ve done it, should have come up with some quick excuse to leave, and yet his brain was fuzzy and he couldn’t think of one logical reason to leave that room. His body ached in more ways than one, and he was not leaving until those aches were soothed. “I will,” he promised in a low voice and pinched her chin between his thumb and forefinger, tipping her face up to kiss her lips again.

Evie swallowed the squeal of happiness that wanted to erupt from her throat and kissed him back. By the Maker, he tasted so sweet and oh… oh, he was so talented with that tongue of his. She wanted to see what else he could do with it. A shiver raced up her spine as she imagined that hot mouth on her, his wicked tongue teasing and tasting, bringing her more pleasure than she’d ever known.

The second the kiss broke, she turned and met Cullen’s eyes again. She moved slowly and confidently to the bed, climbing into it to sit on her knees next to him. Without a word, she took his face in both of her hands and kissed him, moaning softly against his lips. 

Cullen whimpered as she kissed him so sweetly and hesitantly he raised his hands, letting them rest on her hips a moment. “Maker, I’m not certain I can wait,” he breathed against her lips. He also didn’t want to exclude Solas on this, it was clear that they all needed something to help them take the edge off. He knew he would most likely fall asleep soon as well. 

A soft laugh slipped from her lips. “I think we’re all going to have to wait,” she said softly, casting a glance over at Solas as he undressed and stepped into the bath. It killed her to not just climb into his lap and sink down on him, but she could see the exhaustion in his eyes and she could feel it in her own bones. She pulled back slightly from him and laid down on the bed, tugging the covers up a bit. “Lay down. Rest with me for a bit. You’re going to need your energy.”

Cullen chuckled. “I like the sound of that,” he said quietly as he shifted and scooted to lay down as he looked over to where Solas was bathing. He sighed contently and let his head rest on the pillow. It smelled of lavender and something that was distinctly Evelyn. It also did wonders to calm his blood, the intense feeling simmering down into something else and he reached over, cupping Evie’s cheek a moment before he slipped an arm around her waist. “At least the bed will be warm for you when you get in here, Solas.”

The elf chuckled as he scrubbed himself clean. “I cannot wait,” he answered, thinking it would take a great deal of self control to lay in that bed and not act. His length was still hard, thinking of the feel of Evelyn’s curves in his hand, the way Cullen had watched them. He’d always been a rather private person, but now Solas couldn’t help fantasizing about taking Evie while Cullen watched. He bit the inside of his cheek hard and breathed slowly and deeply through his nose to gain control of his body again. After several long moments, he decided it was safe to get out of the tub, and he dried off quickly before he walked to the bedside. “Are you certain this is what you want?” he asked.

Evie let her eyes roam over Solas’ form, the towel around his waist that hung low on his hips, the long lean muscles of his arms. She licked her lips and nodded sleepily. “Lay down with us,” she said, pulling the blankets back for him. The corner of her mouth turned up in a smile when he climbed into the bed and she scooted closer to him, laying her head on his chest. “Cullen,” she said, reaching back and tugging at the Commander to scoot closer to her.

Cullen chuckled softly and moved closer to her as he reached down and pulled the blankets up around the three of them. The skin on skin contact was everything he craved, warm and dry. He couldn’t believe how lucky he was, especially since he narrowly escaped death. He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to the back of her head before he laid his own down on the pillow, unable to stifle a yawn as it worked past his lips. “Not sure how it came to this, but I am grateful.”

Evie closed her eyes and smiled as she snuggled into Solas’ side, Cullen curled around her. This was amazing, better than she ever could have possibly dreamed, and had she not been so exhausted, she was certain there would’ve been no way for her to fall asleep. As it was, she felt safe and warm, and truly wanted for possibly the first time in her life, and it didn’t take her long to drift off to sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SMUT!

Evelyn was the first to wake, blinking at the late evening sun that shone through her windows. Had they managed to sleep the entire day away? Of course, it had been very late when they’d arrived back at Skyhold the night before. It took her a moment to realize that she wasn’t dreaming, that she really was in that bed with Solas and Cullen both. She yawned and stretched slightly, and her eyes widened. Cullen was still curled up around her, his chest against her back, and his length hard against her rear. It sent a pleasant shiver up her spine and she bit her lip, pressing herself back against him and wiggling a bit, trying to wake him up. “Cullen,” she said softly, trying not to moan from just the simple contact of their skin, and she moved a bit more to tease him.

The soft sound of Evie’s voice and her movement in the bed woke Solas first. He turned his head to look at her, smiling when he saw the way her blonde hair stuck out at odd angles around her face. “Good morning, Vhenan,” he murmured without thinking, and leaned over to kiss her. It took him a moment to realize that it was in fact evening, but the sentiment was still the same. He chuckled against her lips as he realized what she was trying to do. “Cullen,” he said, his voice stronger than Evelyn’s, “I do believe the Inquisitor is trying to wake you.”

Cullen grumbled and turned his face more firmly into the Inquisitor’s hair, sleep still clinging firmly to his mind. “Five more minutes,” he muttered, but suddenly gasped as Evie pressed back insistently at him and he groaned, his hips pressing forward against the warmth of her. He couldn’t stop the shudder that went through him at the feeling of pressing against her. “Maker,” he breathed and blinked himself awake, almost startled to see Solas’s intense blue eyes staring at him. He lifted his hand, the soft skin of Evelyn’s stomach beneath his fingers. “Forgive me… I didn’t mean to do that.”

“Mmm, but I did,” Evie said as she rolled over to face him. “Glad to see you’re awake.” She pressed her lips to his, scooting closer to press the full length of her body against him. She loved the feel of his warm skin, the hard muscles of his body. She trailed kissed across his cheek, down the side of his neck to suck at the smooth skin there as her hands roamed over his back. “Oh Maker, I want you,” she breathed hotly and nibbled at his ear.

Cullen let out a deep groan as she rocked against him and he felt his length firm even more at her hot breath upon his ear. He lifted his hands, letting them skim up and down her sides, cupping the curves he found before he leaned down and suckled at her neck, groaning at the wonderful flavor of her clean skin. He met Solas’s eyes and he felt another surge of pleasure that caught him by surprise. “We both want you,” he murmured against her.

A shiver shook her from head to toe at his words. She glanced over her shoulder to see Solas watching them and it only fueled the fire growing low in her belly. “And I want both of you,” she breathed. She turned back to Cullen and kissed her way down his throat to his chest, her hands running down his sides to his hips, back up the carved abs of his stomach. She kissed and licked along the lines his muscles created as she slid one hand down his back to his rear, grabbing the rounded flesh and kneading her fingers into it. 

Solas felt his length harden as he watched them, the way Evie seemed so confident, making it clear what she wanted. “I can wait my turn,” Solas said to Cullen, reaching over and running his fingers through Evelyn’s hair, letting them trail down her spine. He rather thought he would enjoy watching the two of them together, and his cock twitched at the notion. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the back of her shoulder, then scooted back a bit to have a fuller view of them, even if they all three were still covered by the blankets at the moment. “As long as I may watch?”

Cullen couldn’t stop the thrill that ran down his spine and straight into his cock as Evie paid attention to him and Solas’s words seeped into his mind. He found himself nodding before he gave a moan and kissed Evelyn with a fierceness that he couldn’t explain. He groaned as he rocked against her and then back against her fingers. He gripped her hips carefully and rolled onto his back, not sure if his leg would be up to the task of a prolonged kneeling position and he leaned up, catching a pert nipple in his mouth as he twirled his tongue around the little bead. 

A cry of pleasure escaped Evie as Cullen’s mouth closed around the taut flesh. Oh Maker, she could barely believe this was happening. She could feel Solas’ eyes upon them and she threw back the blankets, not wanting to hide anything from him. “Yessss,” she hissed as jolts of pleasure tingled along her spine, pooling low in her belly, her breasts seeming to swell and ache in the most delicious sort of way. She lifted herself up on her knees, not pulling her breast away from him, and wrapped her fingers around his hard length.

Solas propped himself up on one elbow, laying on his side, watching them with an intense gaze. This was more erotic to him than he would’ve expected. Seeing the pleasure they brought each other, the way they teased and touched, just seemed to make him want it all the more. He’d never witnessed such an intimate display from an outsider’s perspective, and he rather enjoyed it. His length throbbed and twitched as he anticipated his turn with Evelyn, letting the Commander enjoy the view. Why did that turn him on so? He didn’t know, nor did he care at the moment.

Cullen keened as Evie grasped him, her hands firm and warm around him and he couldn’t stop himself as he thrust up into her grip. He pulled back, his head tilting as he let out a deep groan as he felt precum ooze from the tip. It had been far too long. Longer than he cared to admit that it had been for him and it had never been this intense. “Yes, please, that. M-more of that,” he pleaded and leaned up, catching her other breast with his mouth while his hand came up to play with the neglected nipple. He swallowed thickly as he lapped at her flesh, he burned. 

“I want you,” she breathed heavily as she stroked him, feeling herself getting wetter by the second. She twisted her wrist, her hand gliding smoothly over his hot flesh, stroking him quickly for a moment, then slowing her hand, teasing, drawing it out. Her eyes watched him intently, studying what he liked, what drew moans from his throat and made him hiss in pleasure. A smirk touched her lips as she pulled her breast away, and she raised an eyebrow at him as she continued to stroke his cock. “More?” she asked as she crawled back a bit, and lowered herself to lick at his length, finally capturing the head of it in her mouth.

Now that was a sight. The Commander grasping at the sheets as Evie licked at him, teasing his cock with her tongue. Solas bit his lip and groaned softly; he didn’t know how long he could stand to lay there and watch. His own cock twitched again, a bit of precum slipping from the tip. It was hard and aching, demanding attention, and he wrapped his hand around it, stroking himself slowly to try to relieve some of that ache. He didn’t want to come, not yet, not until he’d had his turn with Evelyn. But damn it all, he couldn’t stop himself in that moment if he’d tried.

Cullen gave a shout as he curled in around Evie as her hot mouth sealed around him and he gripped her shoulders, trying his best not to pull her down over him. By the Maker that was beyond incredible. He wove his fingers into her hair, slipping them through the soft, silken strands and he cried at the pleasure, tears coming to his eyes as he thrust up into her willing mouth. “Evelyn, I’m not going to last much longer,” he warned, “I want you so much.”

That was enough for her. She climbed up his body, grasping the base of his length. “Me either,” she breathed and steadied him as she sank down onto his thick cock. Her eyes rolled back in her head as he filled her, making her ache. “Oh fuck,” she gasped out, her hands on his shoulders to steady herself, her face screwing up in pleasure. “Oh Maker, Cullen, that feels so good.” She nearly whimpered as she moved, making his cock shift inside her. Her legs trembled as she rode him, slow and steady so as not to do either of them in too soon.

Cullen pulled her close as she sank down onto him, wrapping his arms around her, and rocked with her. It was so hot, so perfect. He ran his arms up and down her smooth back before he rested his hands on her hips once more, guiding her on his cock as he captured her mouth with his, moaning against her at the delicious friction between them. “Oh Maker, yes, Evie. Yes,” he choked out. 

It should have been a sin for it to feel this good. She didn’t know how much longer she could hold back and she moved a little quicker, grinding herself down on him for a moment, then bouncing her hips, driving him deeper and faster into her. Her muscles began to tighten around him, her pleasure winding higher and higher. “Cullen,” she gasped. “I… I’m so close. I’m gonna come. Make me come. Please. Please.”

How could he refuse a request like that? He felt his balls already drawn up tightly against him and he nodded, clenching her hips so tight, he knew that there would be bruises in the morning. Cullen slammed up into her, crying out in pleasure as he did so, “Evie, I’m going to come!” In a moment of inspiration, one hand left her hip and he circled her clit with his thumb as he thrust into her at a hard pace. “Come for me, Evelyn, my love. Come for me!” he shouted as he came, his cock throbbing deeply inside of her as he spilled his essence.

Evelyn threw her head back with a scream as she came, riding Cullen’s cock hard as a heat flooded her body. His thumb on her made stars pop in her eyes and she clenched around him, her body milking every drop from his. “Oh… Maker…” she gasped loudly and collapsed forward over his chest, panting heavily. She kissed his lips, still out of breath, and smiled at him. “That was amazing.”

_ ‘Yes it was,’  _ Solas thought to himself as he watched them lay there for a moment, recovering from the pleasure high. He stilled his hand, knowing he would make himself come if he didn’t stop. His cock only throbbed harder and he licked his lips, waiting. They needed a moment, he knew that, and he was nothing if not patient when he needed to be. 

Evie turned her head, seeing Solas still watching them, and her mouth went dry. His long fingers holding his cock, the intensity in his eyes that made her wonder just how intense lovemaking could be with him. She looked down at Cullen and smoothed the hair back from his forehead. “Are you good for a moment, love?” she asked softly. “I… think someone else wants my attention.”

Cullen managed a smile at her and gave her a nod, his eyes flickering over to Solas and he swallowed thickly at the sight. Suddenly, he wanted nothing more than to watch the both of them together. He ran his hand affectionately over the gentle swell of her rear and nodded towards the elf. “Best to not tease him then,” he murmured and turned his head so he could watch the two of them. He gave a soft moan as she lifted herself from his body and he shivered as the colder air wrapped around him.

Evie pressed a kiss to Cullen’s cheek, catching the corner of his mouth as she moved off of him and turned towards Solas. The elf had a predatory look in his eyes as he got up on all fours. Oh Maker. She gasped as he grabbed the back of her head and crushed their lips together, his tongue seeking entrance to her mouth, which she eagerly gave. Oh he was so good. Her lips throbbed with heat when he broke the kiss and guided her to lay her face on the pillow, her rear in the air. “Solas,” she gasped, feeling vulnerable and excited in that position.

Solas grinned as he reached down between her legs, seeking out her clit. The gasp he drew from her only encouraged him as he quickly twirled his fingers around the tender little nub, teasing it, gently pinching at it, making her buck back against him. He loved that, making her gasp and cry out with a simple touch. Her slit was already wet and slick, her essence mixed with Cullen’s, and he couldn’t wait another moment. “Forgive me, vhenan,” he murmured as he moved closer to her. “I cannot hold myself back. I have to have you now.” He took himself in one hand and guided her back with the other, a long hiss slipping through his teeth as her body easily swallowed him up.

Cullen’s mouth went absolutely dry as he watched the display. “Maker’s breath,” he breathed as he watched Solas’s long length press into her completely. He shouldn’t have been as turned on as that simple gesture made him. He had certainly never before entertained the idea of laying with another man before. It simply hadn’t interested him, but this? There was something about the absolute confidence that exuded from the elf. He sucked in a breath as his eyes flickered to Evie, the way she pressed back against him, her breasts bouncing softly. 

“Fuck!” Evie gasped out, her voice strained and high pitched. She could feel the head of Solas’ cock hitting a sensitive spot deep inside her. So good it was almost painful. She clawed at the pillow, a low guttural moan in her throat and she rocked back against him, taking him to the hilt with every thrust. Her eyes widened when she felt his hand slide over her hip and down between her legs, his long fingers searching out her clit again. She nearly sobbed when he touched her, twisting and pinching the little nub of flesh, sending sparks of pleasure through every inch of her body.

Solas’ eyes rolled back in his head as he felt her silken heat cradle him in her body. She was better than he’d imagined, her body tight and wet, making him wish he could do this all night long. He drove himself needfully into her, listening to her wanton cries and the slick sound of their bodies slapping together. “So good, vhenan,” he purred, working her body even more with his fingers, pounding himself even harder into her. He was aware of Cullen’s eyes on them and it fueled his lust even more. He withdrew further before slamming back into Evie, making a display of it. Something about it just turned him on all the more, and he wanted Cullen to watch. He wanted to be seen.

Cullen swallowed harshly as he was transfixed by them. Moving to lean on his elbow, he let his hand drift down to his still soft cock, thought it was quickly becoming interested again. He shuddered as he palmed himself, watching the way both of their skins flushed the most beautiful crimson. He eyed the long expanse of Evie’s neck and suddenly longed to trail kisses over it, to taste her flushed skin. He hurried and sat up the next moment, freeing his other hand as he reached over and cupped one of her breasts, squeezing it gently before he pinched the nipple between his fingers.

“Oh!” Evie cried in surprise as she felt Cullen’s hand on her at the same time. Just the mere thought of both men touching her at the same time was enough to undo her. She bowed her head and leaned her chest more into his touch, the sharp pleasure radiating through her breast, and she pressed herself back more into Solas. His long cock drove fast and hard into her and the next moment she screamed out as she came again.

“That’s it, Evie,” Solas purred, feeling her walls clench around him. “Come for me.” It didn’t bother him in the slightest that Cullen touched her while he had his way with her. If anything, it only added to it, knowing the Commander was turned on enough by the two of them to throw caution to the wind. He felt his cock swell, his balls tingling and full, and he leaned more over her, pumping his cock into her at a furious pace. “Evelyn,” he moaned, biting at the back of her shoulder, and the next moment he roared in pleasure as he came deep inside her body.

Evie stilled, clenching her muscles as tightly as she could, letting him ride out his orgasm in her. Ohhhh, that was incredible. She panted heavily, the back of her shoulder stinging slightly as she let him ease her down on the bed, his length slipping from her body. She felt empty almost as their bodies parted and she knew that she had to have more. The sun had just sank behind the horizon, and a smile split her lips. The night was just getting started.


	15. Chapter 15

Cullen let himself fall back onto the bed, his head tilted back as he gazed up at the velvet canopy of the bed. He wasn’t entirely certain what he should be feeling in that moment. His body thrumming with pleasure, contentment, aches from battle and the rigorous activities they had just been into. He found he didn’t mind it. “Couple more rounds of this and I will be much too exhausted to dream,” he mused out loud.

“Then that is a good thing,” Solas said as he moved to lay on his side next to Evelyn, reaching out and rubbing her rear. He was still semi-hard even after coming so much, and the heady scent of sex in the air did nothing to alleviate that. A smirk touched his lips and he slid his hand down between her thighs, trailing his finger along the wet seam of her lips, making her jump. “Shall we continue?”

Well he had stamina, Evelyn had to give him that. She raised her face from the pillow and nodded, arching her back to lift her hips a bit. Solas’ touch seemed to set her blood on fire again and she bit her lip as she felt his finger slide into her. “Oh Maker,” she whimpered and looked to Cullen. “He’s trouble. Nothing but… ngh… trouble,” she panted and reached for Cullen’s hand as Solas worked a second finger into her, teasing her sex, watching with that always hungry look in his eyes.

Cullen shivered as he watched Solas press long fingers into Evie’s sex and his mouth watered at the sight. Oh, he was going to be hounded by Mother Giselle if she knew the terrible thoughts he was thinking of doing to the Inquisitor. Nevermind whatever nonsense she had spouted about Dorian. He squeezed Evie’s hand before looking to Solas and he threw all caution to the wind as he extended his hand, pressing a finger inside of Evelyn alongside the elf’s. 

A cry of surprise escaped her and she pressed her face to the pillow, feeling them stretching her body, their fingers deep and exploring. “Both of you!” she gasped, though her voice was muffled. “Both of you are trouble!” She couldn’t stop herself from moving her hips, though, and she raised up on her knees a bit, spreading her legs wider for them. She felt a thumb on her clit, adding to the sensations, and there was the extra excitement of not knowing exactly whose thumb it was. 

Solas smirked and withdrew his fingers from her, pushing at her hip with his free hand to roll her over. He looked at his fingers, glistening with her essence, his own, and Cullen’s. His mouth watered and he locked eyes with the Commander as he popped the digits in his mouth, sucking them clean before he reached down and slid his fingers deep into Evie’s body again. He licked his lips, a moan rumbling in his throat at the delicious taste.

The look in the elf’s eyes would have been enough to make his knees weak if he hadn’t already been sitting down on the bed. He peered at his own fingers before he drew them to his mouth, eyes widening at the exquisite taste of honey and a bit of salt that spread over his tongue. He moaned softly as he licked them clean and licked his lips as he looked back at Solas before down at Evie again, moving his hand to brush against the one that plundered Evelyn. Maker’s breath, what was he doing? A voice in the back of his mind told him to shut up, to enjoy the moment of respite that he had earned. Someone had once told him before, a long time ago, that he should love. Love as much as he could as often as he could. Could it really all be that simple?

Solas felt his heartbeat quicken as Cullen touched not Evie, but him. It was as if all sorts of new possibilities opened up in his mind, and he found that he wasn’t turned off by a single one of them. He’d never felt anything like this before, never thought he would be comfortable like this around another man, yet here they were. Seeing Cullen suck his own fingers put all sorts of thoughts into Solas’ head. His cock hardened fully again, standing up proudly from his lap, and he hesitated at the thought that came to the forefront of his mind. “Do you trust me?” he asked, looking from Cullen to Evie and then back again.

Cullen started, the words pulling him from the haze of the moment and he blinked at the elf, breathing in deeply the air around him. It smelled of sex, heat, and something distinct that was both Evie and Solas. He studied the man for a moment and nodded. “You saved my life. There are few who I would trust more.” He reached out placing his hand on the man’s shoulder, swallowing hesitantly as he flexed his fingers against the firm muscles there.

“Good,” Solas smiled, his heart hammering in his chest. And before he could second guess himself, before he could talk himself out of it, he quickly leaned forward and crushed his lips to Cullen’s. He didn’t know what he expected, he was testing himself before he went any further, to see if kissing this man evoked any sort of reaction from himself. And the reaction was surprising; he found he liked it. He grasped the back of Cullen’s head and tilted his own, his tongue darting out to beg entrance.

Cullen gave a surprised gasp at the sudden, fierce kiss pressed to his lips. He wasn’t certain what he thought would happen when the other man did so. That perhaps the world would stop, that it would do nothing for him, but no. It wasn’t the case. His lips were firmer than Evie’s, but they held such confidence, he hesitated only a moment before he parted his lips, groaning out as a hot pointed tongue slipped in and caressed his own. His hand moved to cup the back of the man’s head as he kissed back with abandon. Maker’s breath, he could kiss. His cock throbbed with want of the unknown, of so many promises that were in the balance. 

Solas kissed Cullen deeply, searching his own feelings as their tongues danced together, and it was enough to convince him. He finally pulled back, breathing heavily, and a weak smile crossed his hot lips.

Evie’s eyes went wide as she watched them. Oh this was a million times better than she ever expected. She was half-tempted to touch herself just watching the two of them like that. “Andraste’s tits, that’s hot,” she gasped out.

Solas laughed at her words, then raised up on his knees a bit, and pushed on Cullen’s shoulders. “Lay back,” he instructed. “Trust me.” As Cullen complied, he reached for Evie’s hand, pulling her to sit up, and he captured her lips in a searing kiss. His heart raced at what he was about to do, and his cock throbbed at the excitement of it all, the newness. So rarely did anything seem new to him. “Scoot back,” he told her when their kiss broke, and he guided her to straddle the Commander’s face, pressing on her rear to get her to lower her sex to his face. He bent low and kissed her again, then slid his fingers into her hair and directed her face to Cullen’s cock. “Suck.”

Cullen’s eyes went wide and he had been about to protest, but the heat and utterly divine gift that had been presented to him was far more than he could resist. He lifted his chin, kissing at Evelyn’s slick sex a moment before he moaned and dipped his tongue into her folds, groaning out as he felt her heated breath on his length. “Mmm,” he murmured against her, pulling back slightly, “He is nothing but trouble.” 

“Oh, you have no idea,” Solas answered, watching with a greedy sort of gleam in his eyes as Evie’s lips parted and wrapped around Cullen’s cock. She looked amazing like that, moaning softly as she sank further down on it, her cheeks hollowing as she sucked. It made his own cock twitch again and he licked his lips as he moved on the bed to lay down between Cullen’s legs. He hoped this wasn’t going too far too soon, but he wanted to do it, he wanted to explore as much of this relationship as he could, as fast as he could. He was almost desperate for it now. 

He slid his hands up the Commander’s legs, pushing them wider apart, the scent of the other man’s body filling his senses. Oh what a magnificent view he had of Evie bobbing on Cullen’s cock, the way her lips stretched around the thick length. He studied the sight before him for a moment, the redness of the hard cock, the soft, full orbs beneath. He swallowed harshly and, before Cullen could protest, Solas leaned in and captured one of the balls in his mouth. 

“Sweet holy Andraste!” Cullen shouted at the odd feeling, but it melted into a deep moan the next moment as the two of them twirled hot tongues around his sex, leaving him gasping for breath. He turned his head to the side, trying to suck in the air that was suddenly stolen from his lungs. Solas had his mouth on him. It was hot, forbidden, and all Cullen could think of was more more more.

Evie was shocked. She could barely believe her eyes, and even less believe that Cullen was allowing this. It turned her on all the more and she sucked harder at the cock in her mouth, swallowing down the little splurts that leaked out onto her tongue. Well obviously he was enjoying it. She locked eyes with Solas as they suckled Cullen’s sex together and she found the moment both erotic and uniquely intimate.

Solas loved the shout of surprise from Cullen and he drew the flesh deeper into his mouth, massaging it mercilessly with his tongue. He pulled back, letting it slip from his mouth with a pop, then took the other into his mouth, giving it the same attention. He moaned as his own length throbbed, trapped between himself and the mattress, and he couldn’t stop himself from rocking his hips into it. Oh, this was wrong, so against anything he’d ever felt before. But he didn’t care. He pulled back again, observing the now slick orbs before him, reaching out to cup them in his hand. He drew his thumb over them, feeling them shift and move inside the skin, and he grasped them a little more firmly, not letting them draw up against Cullen’s body.

Cullen whimpered at the sensation of Solas’s fingers gripping him tightly. He had been so close, so close with Evie’s throat swallowing down around him and the elf’s talented tongue laving over him as if he were a piece of chocolate. His cock gave a twitch as he tried to come at the very thought of that, but he let out a strangled noise as he was denied his pleasure as the grip only tightened more, preventing him. “Solas,” he moaned heavily, turning his face, and desperately buried his tongue back into Evie’s hot folds, his hips thrusting helplessly into their ministrations.

Evie gave a muffled cry as Cullen’s slick, hot tongue slid into her, teasing her. She pulled back and grasped his cock, stroking it rapidly as she pressed her sex more against his face. “Sooooo good, Cullen,” she moaned, then descended on the hard flesh once more. She sucked at him, trying to draw out more of the decadent liquid, determined to taste him fully. She slid her hand back to pinch her own nipple, a high-pitched moan escaping her, and she moved her hips against Cullen’s face as he licked and sucked at her.

The sound of Cullen crying out his name only encouraged Solas all the more. He closed his fingers around the sac, gently kneading the swollen orbs in his hand. He liked this, the sense of control he had, the way he and Evie could make Cullen cry out like that. And part of him wanted the same returned to him, for them to take over and give him whatever pleasure they liked, to be at their mercy. He brought his lips to them again, mouthing over one and then the other, prodding them with the tip of his tongue as he gently pulled on them. Oh how he ached for his own release and he could only imagine what Cullen must’ve been feeling. Just a little more… a bit more teasing, and he would grant the Commander the pleasure he so desperately craved.

Cullen was certain that he was going to lose his mind and he pulled back from Evie as he felt another orgasm approaching, but with the vice around him, he knew he wouldn’t reach it. “Please, please let me come. I… I can’t hold out. You are both driving me insane!” he whimpered the next moment as a strong wave of pleasure crashed through him as Solas’s mouth sealed around him, along with Evie. Oh sweet Maker, there was no greater pleasure than this. There could not be.

Evie eagerly suckled at the head of Cullen’s cock, moaning at the taste of the droplets of precum that slipped out. When Solas’ mouth joined hers, sucking along the shaft, her eyes widened as Cullen flooded her mouth. Oh, he tasted divine and she sucked hungrily for more, her hands roaming over every inch of his body that she could reach. She drank him down until he was spent, a smile pulling at her lips as she sat up and swallowed down the sweet essence. “Oh Maker,” she breathed, wiping her mouth on the back of her wrist.

A pride welled up in Solas as he sat up on his knees, surveying Cullen’s expression when Evie moved off of him. Now that blush was one for the record books. He licked his lips, almost wishing he’d had the opportunity to taste the Commander himself. He ran a hand over Cullen’s leg, gently squeezing at the muscles there, and he had a brief moment of worry. “Was... that alright?”

Cullen drifted back to reality slowly, the buzz of his orgasm still humming through his veins and he nearly missed the question Solas asked him. A silly grin spread over his face and he laughed. “That was brilliant. Maker.” He sighed out and reached for both of them, covering Solas’s hand with his own while he drew a hand over Evie’s lower back. “Maker, I never knew something could feel so spectacular,” he said in a quiet, awed voice. 

A huge grin spread across Evie’s face and she laughed, happy to see him so satisfied and relaxed. It was a rare thing to see him even remotely like this. She moved to lay next to him, resting her chin on his shoulder and draping her leg over him. “That was amazing,” she murmured, even though she hadn’t gotten off. She found she was just as happy to pleasure him so much. “Watching Solas like that. It was incredible.” She moved to nibble at his ear, gently kissing the side of his neck. “I want a lot more moments like this tonight.”

Confident now in where he and Cullen were that night, Solas couldn’t help but to think that almost anything was fair game, so long as they both agreed. His own cock throbbed painfully, still hard and straining for friction. He licked his lips and moved to sit on his knees next to Cullen’s side, taking the Commander’s hand that covered his own. He squeezed it, then pulled it closer to him, placing that hand over his cock.

Surprised, Cullen jerked back, but stopped himself the second he let go and felt a heat crawl across his cheeks. He chuckled, “Sorry.” He pushed himself up, looking back to Solas and to the hardness between his legs. Maker, he could feel the heat radiating off of it and he wasn’t even holding onto it. He swallowed and he watched as his own hand returned to the length and curled around it. It was an odd sensation, the touch was familiar, but it was not his own body. His eyes flickered up to the blue eyes that were watching him and he gave an experimental stroke to the flesh.

Solas hissed in pleasure, though the touch was too light, too slow for what his body needed. Still, he would not rush the other man, letting him warm up to the idea. He placed his hands behind him, leaning slightly back, and carefully rocked his hips forward into Cullen’s grasp. “Yes, lethallin,” he whispered as his cock twitched, a bead forming at the tip. He swallowed and groaned, the ache in his length growing with every passing moment. “More… please.”

Enthralled by all of this, Evelyn carefully moved to lay on her stomach, propping her hands under her chin, and watched silently. This was wonderful. She would have to thank Dorian and Bull and Cole for encouraging her to pursue this. She licked her lips and watched, her breath catching in her chest as Cullen ever so slowly drew his hand up the shaft of Solas’ cock.

Cullen licked his lips as he watched himself for a few moments more, pausing to draw the pad of his thumb over the bead of moisture at the tip, spreading it around the red, flared tip. He swallowed and drew his hand from tip to base and squeezed back up again, drawing forth another drop. He watched as he saw and felt Solas reacting to him, trying to thrust up into his grip, trying to go faster and faster. He breathed heavily through his nose and blushed deeply as he remembered the nights when he had taken himself in hand. He wondered if Solas would like anything like that. He decided he didn’t have anything to fall back on and pictured that he held himself and began to stroke in earnest, squeezing tighter.

A cry escaped Solas as Cullen stroked him faster, gripping him tighter. Now that was what he’d hoped for. It was better than touching himself, the rough hand of the Commander gliding over his flesh, making him breathe heavier, his arms shaking ever so slightly. He rocked his hips up to meet the strokes, watching Cullen’s hand sliding over his cock. “That’s it. Just… just like that,” he panted, feeling his length starting to swell. More precum leaked from the tip, dripping down the length to meet Cullen’s hand. “So close,” he warned, his fingers digging into the blankets behind him, his toes curling beneath him. With a strangled cry, he came, the thick white rivers pouring from his cock, coating Cullen’s hand.

He watched in amazement. It was so odd to see the familiar tremor but not to feel it himself. He felt a sense of pride well in his chest to know that he had been the one to bring Solas such pleasure, that he had been able to return the favor. He stroked Solas through the last wave of his orgasm before he gently let go of the length. He brought his hand closer, looking over the semen that covered his hand before he leaned forward, tasting it. To his surprise, it had a clean taste to it, something that also reminded him of elfroot. He looked up, locking eyes with Solas before he drew his finger into his mouth to lick it clean. He looked over at Evie, the next moment and gave her a smile. “How rude of me. Would you care for a taste?” He offered her the hand.

“Mmm, yes I would,” she purred and crawled forward, slowly lapping at Cullen’s hand. She drew his thumb into her mouth, sucking on it for a moment before she nibbled at the tip, then moved on to the next finger. She threw a smoldering look at Solas as she tasted him, then let her eyes flutter shut as she moaned at the taste. She sucked another finger, then let it slip from her lips, Cullen’s hand now clean, though she still held it. “You boys are spoiling me.”

“This was all your idea,” Solas said, still panting as his length finally softened, and he fell back on the bed, his knees still tucked under him. A silly sort of smile spread across his lips as he stared up at the canopy, feeling breathless. Thank whatever powers that be that he and Cullen had gotten over themselves. They might not have ever gotten to this point, and that was something he didn’t want to think about. Not too long ago, he determined that he was fated to walk through this world, this life, alone. Now? Now he couldn’t imagine a life without either one of them.


	16. Chapter 16

Solas rolled to his side with a groan, stretching his legs out, and he reached for Evelyn’s hand. “We should have trusted you more,” he said softly, drawing his thumb over her knuckles. He had almost missed out on this, almost walked away from something amazing without ever giving it a chance. He slowly shook his head and leaned closer to kiss her, slipping his tongue into her mouth and tangling his fingers in her hair. An ache filled his heart; he wanted to spend every night with her like this, to share this amazing experience with her and Cullen over and over again. “Forgive me, ma vhenan,” he said softly as their lips parted. “I did not see before how incredible this could be.”

Evie pressed her lips together, savoring the heat that bloomed through them from his kiss. “There’s nothing to forgive,” she said. Heat still pooled low in her belly, after helping Cullen to get off, and then watching him take care of Solas in returned. She shifted her hips slightly, trying to alleviate some of the ache, if at least for a bit. She didn’t want to ruin this moment. She trailed her fingertips over his long pointed ear, and smiled as he shivered. “All that matters is that we’re here together now.”

A soft smile spread across Solas’ lips and he nodded, then looked to Cullen. This was still a little strange to him, to feel such affection for another man, but he didn’t want to waste time thinking about it. He just wanted to live in the moment, to enjoy it, whatever this was. He took Cullen’s hand and pulled the bigger man down on his chest, capturing his lips with his own.

Cullen tensed, but he was getting better at it and relaxed into the tender gesture a moment later, smiling into the kiss as he slid a hand over Solas’s chest, rubbing at the muscles there, trailing over a nipple. He would have to get used to everything being so… flat with him, but he was finding that he rather liked the differences between Solas and Evie. He could be willing to get used to it, and that was what mattered. He sighed contentedly as they pulled back; the elf was amazing at kissing. He blushed at the thought but pushed it out of his head as he laid down, his head on Solas’s shoulder. 

A comforting warmth spread through Solas at the contact of the other man, the feel of his head on his shoulder. Yet something was missing. He turned his head and reached for Evelyn. “Evie, come here,” he said softly, and pulled her closer to his side. He had to close his eyes at the overwhelming rush of emotion that filled him in that moment. It was unexpected, something he never thought he would ever feel again. Holding the both of them made him feel complete. 

Oh, she could’ve laid there like that forever with them. Solas’ arm around her shoulders and her head on his chest, Cullen on his other side. She smiled softly and touched Cullen’s cheek, trailing her fingers along his jaw. She bit her lip, toying with an idea she’d had long before this night. She let her hand drift lower to his chest, her nail teasing at his nipple. “You boys aren’t worn out yet, are you?” she asked, her tone low and seductive. 

Cullen moaned softly at her, turning his face towards the skin beneath his cheek. “I knew it. You both are evil, trying to run me ragged.” He peered down at her, seeing the look in her eyes, her lips full as she pouted up at him. He chuckled and reached out to her, threading his fingers through her hair, rubbing behind her ear as he studied her face, an eyebrow raising slightly at the expression he saw. “I know that look. What is it you are getting at?”

Feeling bold, Evie suddenly leaned across Solas and kissed Cullen, trailing her hand down to slip between the two men, caressing his cock. Her pulse pounded, her breath quickened as she thought about what she wanted. “I want you,” she breathed, kissing him again, stroking him as she felt him start to harden in her hand. “Both of you,” she said, “Inside me at the same time.”

Solas shivered as her words met his ears. He let his hand run down her spine to her rear, kneading her flesh with his fingers as sinful images danced in his mind. Now this could prove interesting. He watched the two of them as they leaned over him, kissing each other, and waited to see what Cullen would say to that. He himself found no objections with such an idea.

Cullen’s eyes widened at the thought and for a moment, he almost cursed at her talented hand on his hardening flesh. He couldn’t think right when she did that. He swallowed and glanced over at Solas, his eyes following the hand that he skimmed down her body to squeeze at her rear. “W-what do you mean, at the same time?” He had an idea, but he wasn’t sure how he felt about it. Would they hurt her? Was it safe? He cursed his manhood as it twitched in her grasp.

“I’ll show you,” she purred, giving his length one more firm stroke before she crawled off the bed and went to rummage in a drawer to withdraw a little bottle of oil. She could feel her knees shaking, excitement burning through her veins, and she returned to the bed. She knelt between them as she uncorked the bottle and poured a measure of the oil into her hands, rubbing it between her palms to warm it. “I want to be in the middle,” she said as she reached for both of the, wrapping her hands around their lengths.

Solas’ back arched and he groaned low in his throat as her warm, oil slicked hand wrapped around him. The idea excited him, something new yet again, and he wanted it. His cock firmed and twitched in her hand, and he leaned up to kiss her, running his hand down her back to cup her rear, his fingertips sliding along the line between her cheeks. When she moaned into their kiss and rocked back against his fingers, he knew they were on the same page. 

Cullen’s eyes widened and he couldn’t stop his hips as they jerked forward into that wonderfully slick grip. “Oh sweet Maker,” he breathed out and shivered as he listened to her moan, and he watched Solas’s mouth seem to meld into her own. He licked his lips. “I’m not sure if I’m all too comfortable with that. Ah, well, not yet anyway. If there’s anything I’ve learned from you both is that I should keep an open mind. It’s just…” He blushed and rubbed the back of his neck, “I’ve never done that before.”

Evie broke the kiss with Solas, feeling a little disappointed. “No?” she asked, drawing her hand over his cock again, holding it tightly and working her thumb around the head of it, teasing the little slit at the tip. If there was one thing she’d learned in this, it was not to push either of the two men into something they weren’t ready to try. “Well… okay,” she said, a bit of a pout on her lips and she pulled her hand away from him. “I won’t make you do anything you don’t want to.” She kissed his lips and rubbed her nose against his. “I don’t ever want you to be uncomfortable with us. It’s okay.”

Cullen shook his head. “You misunderstand,” he murmured, reaching his hand down to tease at her slick folds, “I may have misspoke. I wouldn’t mind trying this with you, I just am not certain about, uh, the back way.” His face was on fire, he was certain of it and he gave the two of them a sheepish smile. “But I do want to try. Maker, if this is only for one night, I want to experience as much of you both as I can.”

She smiled again and kissed him once more. “I’ve never done this before either,” she reminded him. Maker, how she loved that blush on his face. She reached for his length again, the oil letting her hand slide smoothly over it, and she rocked herself into his hand. His fingers felt amazing on her, making her want this all the more. She turned her face to look at Solas, a shiver racing up her spine to see the intense way he watched the. “Have you, Solas?”

“No,” he answered and sat up, picking up the bottle of oil and pouring some into his hand. “But I am more than willing to try.” He reached for her ass again, letting his oil-covered fingers trail between her cheeks. His heart raced, knowing it was rather taboo, and that made it all the more exciting. He watched her as she stroked Cullen, comparing himself to the other man. The Commander’s length was a bit thicker than his own, and he reasoned that Evelyn would be more comfortable if he took her from behind instead of Cullen. 

Evie gasped out as she felt Solas touch her there. It was such a new sensation, and it made her face burn. She rocked back a bit as his fingertip teased her opening and her breath seemed to catch in her throat. “Oh Maker,” she whimpered and stroked them both a little faster before she moved to position herself over Cullen, Solas’ hand still teasing her backside. “If you don’t like it, if you want to stop, just say so, okay?” she asked him, hovering over his length, letting him make the decision. “I promise I won’t be upset. I don’t want to do anything we all three don’t want to do.”

Cullen groaned at her touch on him, but nodded his understanding before he reached up to grasp her hips and watched as he pulled her down over his cock, sliding in inch by delicious inch. He shivered as he became fully seated inside of her and pulled her to lay flush against him, plundering her mouth with his as he took his time thrusting up into her. “I very much doubt that I won’t like this.”

Now this was an incredible view. Solas moved behind Evie, still teasing at her flesh, and watched as Cullen steadily slid in and out of her body. It amazed him to see how her body stretched to accommodate his length. He groaned and bit his lip, pressing his finger against the tight ring of muscle. “Breathe, vhenan,” he said calmingly as he heard her gasp and felt her tense. “Relax.” He waited until he felt her muscles give and he slid his finger into her body, gently working her open.

If her face could’ve caught fire, Evelyn was certain it would have by now. “Andraste preserve me,” she whimpered, bowing her head to Cullen’s shoulder. She trembled as she felt Solas’ long finger pressing into her, the sensation foreign and forbidden, and more pleasurable than she’d expected. She rocked slower on Cullen’s cock and bit lightly at his shoulder, her mind trying to catch up to the sensations happening to her body. “Oh!” she cried out, her face screwing up as Solas added a second finger, stretching her even more.

Solas’ cock throbbed as he felt how impossibly tight her body was around his fingers. And there was something else he could feel, something he hadn’t expected, though now it made sense. There was a hard ridge he could feel inside of her, moving against his fingertips, and he realized that he could feel Cullen’s cock through the thin wall of muscle. He shivered and pressed his fingertips down, rubbing them along the hardness he could feel as he moved his fingers in and out of Evie.

Cullen let out a gasp and a moan as he suddenly felt the rubbing against his cock. It made Evie feel even tighter around him and knowing that it was Solas’s fingers pressing against him only served to make him harden further. “Maker, yes. Right there,” he whimpered and swallowed harshly. His hand skimmed down Evelyn’s back and after a moment’s hesitation, he squeezed her rear before he parted the globes in an effort to give Solas more access to her. He absolutely loved the way her body clenched down on him as the elf prepared her.

After another minute or so, Solas withdrew his fingers and picked up the bottle of oil again, drizzling more of it onto his hard length. It took a great deal of effort to steady his breathing, and even more to steady his hands as he got to his knees behind her. He loved that, seeing Cullen spreading her wide for him. He met Cullen’s eyes over Evie’s shoulder as he teased the head of his cock against her hole, pressing firmly against her. Oh, even with preparing her body, she was still unimaginably tight. “Slowly, Evie,” he said as he leaned over her back, feeling her pressing back against him.

Evie thought she might cry in that moment, the pleasure mixing with a burning pain that only heightened her senses. Solas felt incredibly big against her, and for a moment she wasn’t certain that she would be able to do it. She tried to relax her body, to concentrate on the feeling of Cullen’s cock inside her. She bit her lip and rocked down harder on him, feeling his length hitting all the sensitive spots inside her. Her eyes went wide the next instant when she felt it; her body gave to Solas and his cock slid smoothly into her, filling her body completely. “Fuck!” 

Cullen threw his head back as he too felt Solas sliding into her body. The way his cock pressed against his with only that thin wall of muscle separating them was hotter than he thought it would be. He swallowed hard for a moment, leaning up so he could capture Evie’s lips, murmuring against them, “That’s it, love. You are doing amazing. You feel incredible.” He moaned, feeling his length twitch within her. “Maker you are so tight.”

Encouraged by his words, Evie rocked her hips a bit, feeling both of them inside her. She’d never known such pleasure. It left her panting, almost unable to breathe, and her mind was already dizzy from it all. She dipped her head to suck at the side of Cullen’s neck, flexing her muscles, squeezing both of them inside her.

Solas gasped when she seemed to tighten around him even more. He held still, letting her adjust to his length inside her, letting her take control. He could feel Cullen’s cock against his own, the two of them rubbing together, and it sent sparks of pleasure shooting through his body. “That’s it, Evie,” he breathed, his hand going to her hip to guide her movements as he carefully thrust his hips forward. “That’s so good.” 

Cullen shuddered as he moved his hips, trying to find a balanced rhythm without doing too much to Evie too soon. “Andraste have mercy.” He bit his lip as he angled his hips a little, thrusting into that deliciously tight heat. His eyes met Solas’s over Evelyn’s shoulder. He let his eyes wander over the other man, drinking in the way his pale skin flushed an attractive pink, the way the tops of his ears seemed to glow. He looked to his lips, the way they parted as he thrust into her backside and he wondered, briefly, what it must feel like. How hot and tight it must be. 

The pleasure was amazing, but the connection Solas felt with the two of them was almost overwhelming. It nearly brought tears to his eyes to feel this, to be so accepted. He leaned over Evelyn’s shoulder and kissed Cullen, threading his fingers into Evie’s hair and turning her face to them so they could all three share the kiss. Nothing could ever compare to this, all three of their bodies joined together, their tongues dancing and winding around each other. A whimper escaped his throat and he thrust more sharply into Evie’s body.

A cry escaped her as she felt Solas fuck her harder, the oil letting his cock slide smoothly in and out of her body. She felt stretched and full, her body aching deliciously, and she didn’t know how much more she could take. She wiggled her tongue against theirs, letting them take as much pleasure from her body as they wanted. She loved it, the pleasure they gave her, knowing that she did the same for them in return. “Harder,” she panted.

Cullen was quickly losing his mind to pleasure. Nothing could compare to this, the physical contact, the emotional pull he felt. It brought tears to his eyes in the best way possible. He reached up, cupping Solas’s cheek as they kissed together with Evelyn. It was sloppy, it was uncoordinated, it was perfect. He pulled back with a moan, reaching to cover Solas’s hands on Evie’s hips and began to pound into her as hard as he was able in his current position. “Oh fuck, Maker. Yes, Evie, yes!”

Hearing Cullen curse like that, crying out in passion, just drove Evie closer and closer to that edge. Gone were inhibitions, the three of them lose to the pleasure. “Fuck me,” she begged, moving her hips faster. With every move, she impaled herself on one of their cocks, and she screamed out as her orgasm hit her. Wave after wave of the most intense pleasure she’d ever felt washed over her every nerve, making her body seize up between them, clenching down on their lengths inside her.

Solas’s vision went white as Evelyn squeezed around him even tighter than before, hearing her cries mixing with Cullen’s. He slammed himself harder and faster into her, shouting in pleasure the next moment as he came. It was almost too much, too intense, feeling how hot and tight she was around him, Cullen’s cock rubbing against his own, drawing his orgasm out. “Evie! Cullen!” he cried out in passion, not caring what he sounded like or who might’ve heard them.

Cullen’s control was overridden by Solas who had the better position and his head jerked back as his body surrendered to that thought, to the sheer amount of pleasure that swamped his body as Evie became like a vice around him. The air was sucked from his lungs as he cried out his release, quite certain all of Skyhold knew what they were doing. He clenched his own legs around the both of them, locking his ankles behind Solas’s back as he trembled, his orgasm still throbbing through him. “Oh Maker, Andraste, perfection,” he murmured as he tried to shake his mind free of the haze, but gave up the next moment.

Solas panted heavily, resting his forehead between Evie’s shoulder blades as he struggled to catch his breath. He could feel her trembling beneath him, hear her and Cullen also panting for air. Sweat trickled down his back, the scent mixed with sex in the air. He didn’t know if he would ever recover from this. Cullen was right, it was perfection. He didn’t want to part from them, not yet. His length twitched inside Evie as it began to soften, and the only response he could muster was a long, sated groan.

“Amazing,” Evie breathed, feeling boneless as she lay between them. She let her head fall to Cullen’s chest, listening to the way his heart raced. Oh, she wouldn’t be walking right in the morning. But she didn’t care.  _ ‘Worth it!’  _ her mind screamed and a breathless gasp of a laugh escaped her. She turned her face to kiss at Cullen’s throat. “Thank you,” she murmured, then reached back to grab Solas’s hand. “Both of you. That was better than anything I’ve ever dreamed of.”

Cullen felt himself sinking deeply into the mattress, a contented smile pulling at his lips as he enjoyed the weight of the two of them on top of himself. He felt so grounded and cared for in that moment, he wouldn’t have it any other way. “Better than I could have imagined. I never thought… well, you know. It’s hard for me to think of something like this actually working, but consider me pleasantly surprised,” he murmured, turning his face into Solas’s neck, which was closest to him. He sighed out, kissing gently at the flesh.

A contented sigh escaped Solas and he tipped his head to the side, giving Cullen better access to his neck. The pleasure had been incredible, but this… This affection, the caring he could feel from both of them, that was above and beyond. He curled his fingers around Evelyn’s, holding her hand as he just enjoyed the gentle kisses along his neck. After a few moments, he turned his face and caught Cullen’s lips, giving him a long, gentle kiss, then pressed an affectionate kiss to Evie’s cheek. With a groan, he finally pulled back, slipping from her body, and moved to lay next to them.

“Don’t wanna move,” Evie grumbled, but finally rolled off of Cullen, collapsing on the bed between them. She rubbed at her eyes, knowing the sun would be up soon. “We can just hide in here forever, right?” she asked, shivering now that the heat of their bodies was parted from her and she sat up to grab the crumpled blankets at the end of the bed, tugging them up around them. She stretched with a light moan, then settled into the mattress, a content and happy smile on her face. “I could do this every night.”

Cullen chuckled at that, curling his arm around a squishy pillow before he peered over at Solas. “I do believe she intends to just use us for our good looks. We should make our escape before we are only shells left for her amusement.” He shot Evie a teasing wink before he rolled onto his stomach, stretching his legs out. “Mmm, but perhaps I could be okay with every night. What better way to avoid my dreams than to not sleep at all.”

“Saves me from figuring out that potion for you,” Solas chuckled, laying flat on his back with his arms stretched over his head. His heart still raced, though his breathing had mostly leveled out. Every night? He rather liked that prospect. Not just for the sheer pleasure, but for the connection he felt, the acceptance, the affection. Things he told himself he would never have again, because he did not deserve them. A lump formed in his throat, knowing he could not share all that he was with them. He felt selfish in that moment, for giving in, for getting so close to these two humans. He closed his eyes and let out a long, heavy exhale. He could think more on it later, he told himself, and he tried to push it from his mind. He didn’t want to ruin this moment.

“You say that like you’re complaining,” Evie deadpanned, trying to narrow her eyes at Cullen, but she was too exhausted for the expression to have much impact. “But I sure didn’t hear you saying no.” She giggled and reached over to scratch lightly at his back, drawing her nails up and down his spine. “Rest now, love. You know they’re going to be looking for us in the morning. I just want to enjoy this as long as we can.”

Cullen groaned at the thought of people coming to bother them and he sank down under the covers more. “Let’s bar the door with something. They can’t bother us if they can’t get to us,” he reasoned and closed his eyes. “Besides, I should still be recovering from a very grave injury. That’s a good an excuse as I can think of to be absent for a few days…”

Evie gave a tired laugh and patted Cullen’s back. “As good an excuse as any,” she murmured, feeling sleep pulling at her. She snuggled back against Solas’s side, her arm still outstretched over Cullen, and sighed as she closed her eyes. She knew the world would demand their attention tomorrow whether she liked it or not. But for now, the world could wait.


	17. Chapter 17

Evie awoke to unfamiliar sounds in her room and she sat up, blinking against the bright sunlight. Oh, her body ached. But then the memory of the night before came rushing back to her and she smiled. She had to look at the two men in her bed as if to reassure herself that it wasn’t all a dream. 

The clatter of a piece of silverware drew her attention and her eyes widened. “Cole!” she scolded and pulled the blankets up around herself. “Why must you insist on popping into my room when I’m not dressed?” She paused in her scolding, tipping her head to the side as she saw the large breakfast he was setting out. The gesture warmed her heart and she smiled. “You didn’t have to do that.”

Cole blinked over at her, tilting his head. “But you all were getting hungry. The food doesn’t mind helping.” He looked over towards the stairs. “I even told the door to not let anyone in for a little while. You need your rest,” he said quietly before he walked over to her wardrobe and pulled out the robe that was her favorite, then brought it over to her. He smiled at the two men in her bed, sleeping soundly. “You quieted their hurts. It feels good between you all now.”

The corner of her mouth twitched in a smile and she accepted the robe from him, pulling it securely around herself. She blinked as his words registered in her mind. “You told the door… Nevermind,” she said, laughing quietly as she climbed out of the bed and wandered over to look at the breakfast he’d brought. “I should thank you,” she said as the picked up a piece of sausage, her stomach rumbling. “I know Dorian suggested it first, but you helped me decide to do this. This…” She paused, considering her words for a moment. “This makes me really happy. So thank you.”

He smiled at her. “It feels good,” he agreed with her and looked to the men, “You should wake them, they are both hungry too. Tired, aching, but oh so good. Content to just lay in warmth forever.” He smiled gently. “Tell Cullen not too worry about his troops. Cassandra is keeping watch over them until he is ready.” 

Evie nodded and swallowed down the bite of sausage before she went back over to the bed, leaning down to nibble on Solas’s ear. 

“Mmm, morning already?” he asked with a groan as he stretched his whole body, then relaxed back into the mattress. The scent of food hit his nose, making his stomach rumble, and a sleepy smile split his face. “Good morning, beautiful,” he murmured and kissed her lips. He felt as though they were being watched and he broke the kiss, looking around the room, and spotted Cole. “Ah, now I understand,” he said and got up, pleased to see that Cole had been thoughtful enough to bring changes of clothes for himself and Cullen. 

“Cullllllennnn,” Evie singsonged and crawled more onto the bed, leaning over the Commander to playfully lick at the side of his neck. “Wake up, sleepyhead. Before your breakfast gets cold.”

The Commander blinked himself awake, his brain still fuzzy and he was oh so warm underneath the covers. The scent of breakfast woke him more than anything and he rolled over towards Evelyn’s voice. “You were brave enough to wander downstairs and get us food?” he murmured, his voice still thick with sleep. He never got to sleep in very much, so he cherished when he could. He blinked as he realized someone else was in the room besides the three of them and he sat up quickly. “Cole!” He sighed and held a hand to his head, “Of course.” He blinked at the food spread out on the table in the middle of the room… had there been a table there before? “Thank you.”

“Don’t worry, he told the door not to let anyone in,” Evie said as Solas tossed a pair of pants onto the bed for him. She grinned and slid off the bed, going to sit at the table, hissing slightly as she sat in the hard wooden chair. She hoped she didn’t have to attend any sort of meetings or Josephine’s “interludes” within the next few days. 

Solas pulled on his pants and tunic, then settled himself at the table. “Very thoughtful of you, Cole,” he said warmly. He wasn’t certain he wanted the rest of the inner circle to know about his relationship with Evie and Cullen, but he knew that Cole wasn’t the sort to judge anyone for this. He fixed his plate and took a bite of toast as he considered his words. “We would… appreciate it if you didn’t mention this to anyone else. What we do in private, we would like to keep that way.”

Cole tilted his head. “Why would you want to hide something that is so warm, so much happiness?” But he nodded the next moment. “I understand, not ready to reveal, want to hold onto it as much as we can before the reality comes back inside,” he murmured, “The walls are talking though, it wasn’t me. The people talked, whispered as soon as you came here. I will do what I can.” And he vanished in a puff of smoke.

Evie felt as though she’d swallowed a block of ice. “What does he mean?” she asked, looking from Cullen to Solas. She set her fork down and tucked her hands under the table, a knot forming in her stomach. “You think people know? I mean, it’s not like I’m ashamed, I just… it’s not their business,” she finished lamely. She thought back over the past couple of weeks, how Solas and Cullen had been at her side while she was injured, how people must’ve seen her and Solas bringing Cullen to her room after Adamant. Damn it.

“The people here would talk whether there was actually something worth talking about or not,” Solas said firmly. “Whatever gossip is spreading through this castle, ignore it. They will latch onto something new within the week and what they say about us now will all but be forgotten.” He looked over to the Commander and gestured for him to join them at the table. “Eat, lethallin, before it gets cold.”

Cullen pulled on the pants that had been thrown to him and scrubbed at his face as he came over to the table and sat down. Cole had managed to place it just the right distance from the fireplace and it was really quite warm and cozy. “Unfortunately, rumors spread through this place like wildfire. It is a shame. I would prefer our affairs to be just that. Our affairs. Hopefully, once they’ve gotten it out there, it will just… return to normal?” he asked hopefully.

Their words calmed her down a bit and Evie nodded. “Let’s hope,” she said and picked up her fork again, though the food didn’t taste quite as good as it had before. She didn’t know what she was so afraid of. In all honesty, what was the worst that could happen? People might give her funny looks for a few days, they might whisper as she walked by. She nearly laughed at herself. “You think I’d be used to people gossiping about me by now.”

“It is because they have nothing better to talk about,” Solas said. Now that the issue came up, he found he didn’t much care if people knew or not. It didn’t matter what anyone thought of him. But he did hope that Evie and Cullen would not suffer for it. He would not stand for that. That sense of protectiveness welled up inside him stronger than ever and he sharply bit at a piece of toast. “Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, and small minds discuss people.”

Cullen smiled at that, looking up from his plate as he held up a forkful of eggs. “Well said,” he murmured quietly before he looked over to Evie, seeing the look on her face. “What matters that the ones most important to us already have some inkling any way. And our real friends would be happy for us,” he said while hoping that would be true. He reached over and covered Evie’s hand with his own, stroking at the skin affectionately.

She managed a small smile for him. “You’re right. They would be,” she said, already thinking of telling Dorian, who she knew would be happy for her. She felt her spirits lift a bit more, and she reached across the table to take Solas’s hand as well. “I don’t know what I would do without either of you.”

* * *

Evie managed to enjoy the rest of their breakfast without stressing too much over whatever gossip was flying through Skyhold. It was no one else’s business, she kept telling herself over and over. When they were done eating, Evie kissed Cullen and Solas, then sent them on, telling them she would meet up with them later. She took her time getting dressed and braiding her hair back out of her face. Procrastinating, she knew, but finally there was no more avoiding it and she headed downstairs to the Great Hall with her shoulders squared, her head held high, and walking as normally as her aching body would allow.

It wasn’t as bad as she expected. A few people glanced her way, but nothing major. Most people gawked at her anyway, trying to get a look at the mark on her hand. She thought about sneaking up to Dorian’s nook for a bit, hanging out with him, but her stomach flipped unpleasantly the next moment when her path was blocked. “Morning, Vivienne,” she said as politely as possible.

“My darling Inquisitor,” Vivienne said, giving the woman a once over and the corner of her mouth twitched, but she gave nothing away. “Don’t you look absolutely dreadful. They make a cream for that, my dear,” she said and turned, motioning that the woman should follow her. “I had hoped to speak to you. I am absolutely curious as to know what in Thedas you’ve been thinking as of late.”

Evie blinked at the harshness of Vivienne’s words, even though they were spoken in such a sweet tone. She’d looked herself over before she left her room, and she didn’t think she looked that bad. “I only have a few moments,” she said, falling into step beside Vivienne, wishing she’d made it across the Great Hall and to Dorian before Vivienne had managed to corner her. “What do you mean? I think about lots of things all day long.”

“Oh don’t play so innocent with me. I know you know what I am talking about. I’m just curious as to how you could think that bedding two men at the same time would look good for the Inquisition, let alone for yourself.” She turned and raised an eyebrow at the Inquisitor. “How well do you think the Inquisition’s reputation will be perceived once every faction learns that its leader is whoring herself out to any man who comes crawling to her door? Especially an elvhen apostate mage whom no one knows anything about, and the Commander of the Inquisition forces who regularly suffers from lyrium withdrawal and night terrors. Really my dear, if you were going to make a spectacle, you could have thought this through first.”

Vivienne might as well have slapped her. In one statement, the woman had managed to insult all three of them. And always in that sickly polite tone, though she spoke a smidge too loud, and Evie knew it was to embarrass her. She felt her eyes sting, and a lump formed in her throat, but she would not give Vivienne that sort of satisfaction. Alongside the hurt and the anger, she felt an overwhelming sense of sarcasm well up inside her. “Well damn, you figured me out,” she said, trying very hard not to grit her teeth as she spoke. “Didn’t you know that was my plan all along? I figured we’d get tons of potential allies if I just whored myself around enough. I’d just lay back with my feet in the air, line ‘em up, and the world would right itself. And look at you, figuring out my plan. You’re so  _ smart,  _ Vivienne,” she spat. She didn’t know what prompted her to say it, but slapping the other woman instead just didn’t seem like a smart move. 

“I wouldn’t have said it so crudely, my dear, but there you have it,” she said as she delicately crossed her arms. “You must realize that your bad behavior reflects on all of us. If the rest of Thedas thinks that you have an open bed, what must they think of the rest of us?” She smiled down at the woman. “Are you such a glutton that you had to have two of them at once? You already have too much trouble trying to pick out what to wear. I do remember telling you before that you need to rise above the rest, become the idol that other people will adore and aspire to be. If they see you on your back with your ankles by your ears for two men, what message will that send to our enemies?”

Oh that bitch. “A glutton? So what, now I’m selfish too? Yup, that’s me. Evie the selfish whore,” she said, a little louder than she meant to. She had to get away from Vivienne. She didn’t know how much longer she could stand there and listen to this. “Let our enemies think what they will. Perhaps if they see me as nothing but an ignorant slut they’re underestimate me and then I’ll have the advantage.” She pressed her lips to a thin line and looked Vivienne up and down. She should never have let her into the Inquisition, but she’d thought it would be better to have her as an ally rather than an enemy. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to the garden to pray. Or fuck. I’ll decide along the way,” she said and turned on her heel to march away.

She didn’t run, she wouldn’t let herself appear to be fleeing from a fight, but oh how she wanted to. “Stupid bitch,” she muttered under her breath as she let her feet carry her to the garden. Her vision went blurry and she had to wipe her eyes with the cuff of her sleeve. Is that what everyone thought of her now? She knew Vivienne couldn’t be the only one. She really hadn’t expected that. It made her heart ache to hear Solas and Cullen spoken so poorly about. They didn’t deserve that.

She sniffled and looked around when she reached the garden, though it was mostly bare and covered with a thin layer of snow. Not much of a garden this time of year. Still, it was better that way. Fewer people ventured out here. She tromped over to the well, half-tempted to throw herself down it for a moment, and sat down. 

“Fuck them all,” she muttered miserably as she drew her knees up to her chest. She barely even felt the cold ground or the stone at her back. She was so angry and hurt that the cold was the least of her worries. She screwed up her face and bowed her head ot her arms as tears spilled from her eyes. This was exactly what she didn’t want to happen. And what hurt her more was that people now thought poorly of Cullen and Solas, when this had all been her idea. They deserved so much better.

* * *

 

Varric frowned from where he stood, watching the Inquisitor for a moment. Being in the Great Hall had its perks. He could hear all the juicy bits of gossip no one thought they were sharing. No one ever thought twice about the dwarf scribbling away at papers in front of his fireplace. But he hadn’t needed to be subtle to hear what Vivienne said to the Inquisitor. He stepped out into the garden, shifting the bottle of wine he held so he could hold the fur cloak better as he approached Evelyn, draping it around her shoulders before he moved to sit next to her against the well. “I always had this underlying suspicion,” he started as he took a knife and expertly removed the cork from the bottle before he offered it over to her, “that the Iron Lady would be a villain to tremble the masses. I hate being right.”

“She’s a bitch,” Evie said, unable to think of anything better to say than that. She eyed the bottle of wine, then snatched it out of his hand and took several gulps from the bottle. She sniffled, hiccuped, and wiped her nose on her sleeve as she tried to calm down. “I can’t believe she said that. I mean, it’s not like I expect her to be nice. Ever. To anyone. But still. I just…” She trailed off with a sigh and leaned her head back against the well, staring up at the dull grey-blue sky. She didn’t know if she wanted to know the answer, but she couldn’t stop herself from asking it. “Does everyone really think I’m a whore?” she whispered.

Varric snorted at her question. “Nah. Well, Mother Giselle might stand with the Iron Lady, but they’re a party of two. You know everyone in the inner circle is more than happy for you. You deserve to have whatever happiness you can find in life. If it just so happens to be with Curly and Chuckles, so be it. Fuck what everyone else thinks. They both need you, if you ask me. Chuckles is too serious all the time and Curly needed something to do aside from planning a war all the time. Shit’s not healthy.” He took the bottle from her and took a long pull from it, the spices and heat warming him from the inside out. “You don’t want to know what the Iron Lady and the Revered Mother said to me after they found out about Bianca. Shit, I’ll never hear the end of that one for having ‘relations with a married woman.’”

“Let’s stuff ‘em both down the well,” she said with a bitter laugh. But she frowned again the next moment. The lump in her throat just wouldn’t seem to go away. “I just don’t want Cullen or Solas to catch any grief over this. Cullen’s worked so hard to get where he is. His job means so much to him. I don’t want this to somehow ruin that. And Solas…” She heaved a sigh and shook her head. “Well, to be honest, I don’t think Solas has ever given a shit what anyone thought of him.” Her eyes burned again and she pressed the heel of her hand to her mouth. “Last night was so amazing. We were so happy. All three of us. And now,” her voice cracked and she had to take a second to even get the words out, “now I think maybe it was all a mistake.”

“Well,” Varric said slowly, looking up into the grey sky, dark clouds threatening them with snow, “Let me ask you this. Are you just saying that because you really think it was a mistake or because of what the Iron Lady said to you? If you all are happy, with each other, with whatever it is you have going on, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Go with it. Good things don’t come around often, Inquisitor. It’s those kinds of things that last forever, cheesy as it sounds. The Inquisition won’t be around for the long haul, I’m betting, but whatever you’ve got started with the two of them could be. Don’t let other people decide what’s best for you.”

She gave a small nod and took the bottle back from him. “Maybe I’m still not used to making my own decisions,” she muttered and drank deeply from the bottle again. She shivered and pulled the cloak tighter around her. “I don’t know what to think. I just don’t want either of them hurt by this. Seems like all I’ve done is hurt them since this all began. Everything I try just blows up in my face.” She probably wasn’t being fair to herself, the three of them had ended up working out better than she’d ever thought they could, but Vivienne’s words still had her stinging and angry. She rubbed at her face with a groan. “I’m sorry, Varric. I’m not very good company right now.” She looked over at him, managing a small smile. At least he was on her side. “Thanks, though. You made me feel better.”

“I live to serve.” He smiled and looked at her, rubbing her shoulder for a moment. “You’re being too hard on yourself. Don’t you worry about the men. They’re adults and can take care of themselves, but it’s good they have you worrying over them. Maker knows they need someone covering for them,” he said and with a groan, he stood up, “Come by the tavern when you feel up to it. First round is on me and you can see that the rest of us don’t share her concerns.”

Evie nodded, though she really didn’t feel like going to the tavern. There were still others she worried wouldn’t be as comfortable with the situation. Cassandra. Blackwall. And Maker help her if Sera decided to say anything. “I won’t stay out here long,” she promised, though she wasn’t entirely sure if that was a lie or not. “Maybe we can play a couple hands of Wicked Grace.”

He chuckled, “Sounds perfect, Inquisitor, but if I don’t see you in, let’s say an hour, I’ll be sending a search party out for the ice statue you will have turned into.”


	18. Chapter 18

Evelyn was nearly frozen stiff by the time she decided to get up off the ground. The wine bottle was empty and though she’d stopped crying, her nose continued to run. “Now I’ve gone and made myself sick,” she muttered as she slowly moved to leave the garden, tossing the bottle over her shoulder. She was cold, drunk, and she really didn’t care. She paused in her steps, concentrating hard. Wasn’t there something she was supposed to do? Oh! Varric. She was supposed to meet him in the tavern. 

Even though it was late morning, the sky was heavily overcast, for which she was grateful. She didn’t think she could stand the brilliant sun. The weather seemed to match her mood, which she thought was appropriate. She kept her head ducked low as she tromped to the tavern. She didn’t want to speak to anyone and she certainly didn’t need to see their prying, accusatory looks. 

The warmth of the tavern washed over her, making her cheeks and ears sting. She sniffled and glanced around, finally seeing some of her inner circle sitting together at a table in the corner. Usually they took up one of the larger tables in the middle, and she suspected that Varric had suggested the change today. She hurried over and plopped herself down in a chair next to Dorian. “Hide me,” she muttered and leaned her forehead on his shoulder.

Dorian’s eyes widened as he felt her cool skin against his neck and he wrapped an arm around her, summoning a little bit of fire magic to his fingertips. “Maker’s breath, Evie. Did you go for a morning dip in ice water?” He clicked his tongue at her and waved at the bartender. “Some of that stew and spiced wine for the Inquisitor!” he called and looked back to her, brushing his hand over her forehead, “You’ll be lucky if you didn’t catch your death of cold out there.”

Evie gave a half-hearted shrug. “Didn’t really feel it,” she muttered, though now she could feel every inch of her beginning to sting as the warm tavern air began to thaw her out. She groaned at the heat from Dorian’s fingertips and she almost pulled away from him. 

“You shouldn’t let Viv get to you like that,” Bull said, leaning back in his chair and taking a deep swig from his tankard. News of what had happened between the Inquisitor and the First Enchanter had spread quickly. “Gotta admit, I wasn’t sure you’d manage it, getting those two in bed with you. You should be proud,” he said in an approving tone. “Not hiding out to freeze to death while you down a bottle of wine. I don’t see what there is to be ashamed about.”

“Ahhh… the fact that most of Skyhold thinks I’m a whore?” she countered. Her brain was fuzzy from the wine, and it did nothing to help the headache she felt. But her mind was clear enough to comprehend that obviously everyone knew what had been said between her and Vivienne.

“Bah, who cares what they think,” he growled and waved a hand as if shooing away a fly. “Fuck ‘em all.”

Dorian nodded in agreement. “And if we find anyone who does care, I’m quite certain that the rest of us can  _ convince _ them to not care rather quickly.” He rubbed at Evelyn’s back. “I am rather jealous though. Didn’t think the strapping Templar would come around. Is he every bit as good as I can imagine?” he teased her.

Blackwall shook his head and held up his hand. “No, don’t. There are some images I’d rather do without in this life, thank you very much.” He drank from his cup deeply. “And you shouldn’t worry about what the First Enchanter thinks. According to her, everyone has room for improvement, save herself,” he said, leaning back, “As it is, everyone in our strange little family has odd situations when it comes to relationships. At least you’ve worked up the courage to talk to your two loves. I’ve yet to try and approach Lady Josephine.” 

Evie sat up a little, though her shoulders still slumped. “Yeah, but you could talk to her if you wanted to without someone jumping your ass for it,” she mumbled. She still didn’t understand the deal between him and the Ambassador. “You two could be really happy together if you would just say something to her.” A tiny smile pulled at her lips. “You want me to send Cole your way? He’s the one who finally convinced me to pluck up the courage to tell them what I wanted.”

“Eh, no thanks, that kid pokes around in my head too much as it is,” he said and finished off the rest of his ale, setting it down on the table with a thunk as Varric chuckled at him. “Besides, she’s too lovely. There’s no way she’d want to be with an old Warden like me.” He ran a hand through his hair and leaned back, looking at Evie, “You just keep doing what you’re doing. As long as you and the other two are happy, then no one has the right to tell you that you’re wrong. If they do, you just tell them to come see me.”

The corners of Evie’s mouth twitched in a smile. It made her feel better to hear that her friends would defend her like that. Maybe she’d let Vivienne get to her too much. She ran a hand down her face, still feeling rather off from the wine she’d drank. She groaned as the barmaid set a bowl of stew and a tankard of warm wine in front of her. “I really shouldn’t,” she muttered, but drank anyway, the liquid heating her from the inside out. She smacked her lips and looked to Blackwall. “Thanks. I might just take you up on that.”

Bull smirked. “And before anyone gets to thinking that your relationship is weird, just think of me and Dorian. A Tevinter mage and a Qunari spy,” he laughed in a low, rumbling chuckle. He reached over and clapped a hand to Dorian’s back, amused at the way Dorian ever so slightly flinched, and rubbed his hand up and down the mage’s spine. 

“I suppose when you put it like that,” she said, spooning up some of the soup and blowing across it. Oh that was good. She ate a couple more bites before she remembered Dorian’s previous question and a mischievous little smile spread across her lips. She leaned over and whispered loudly in his ear, “He’s better than you could ever imagine.”

Dorian grinned widely, leaning back a little into Bull’s hand. Maker, but the man was an absolute furnace and he loved it in the cold south. “I knew it, you lucky woman you,” he said, “But I am absolutely curious about Solas. I never really thought much about, well, okay, maybe one time I tried to imagine what he must look like under those hobo clothes of his. You must do something about that dreadful wardrobe, my dear. Leave the tight pants though. About the only thing he has working for him.”

Evie wrinkled her nose at him. “I happen to like him just the way he is. Hobo wardrobe and all,” she said stuffily. She tried to imagine Solas dressed any other way, and all she could come up with was that awful red uniform from the Winter Palace. And that was just so not him. “I don't think I should share any more juicy details with you. For one, you'll just be worried over what Solas may or may not be wearing. And two, I don't want to make you jealous.” She nearly snickered, grateful to be bantering with him instead of making herself sick over what Vivienne thought.

Varric shook his head at her. “And how else am I going to get material for my new book if you don’t share at least some of the details.” He gave her a wink and took a drink from his own ale. “Throwing in my own weird shit relationship, at least the love of your life isn’t married to another man,” he muttered, feeling a little off for having admitted it. “Or has a family that sends armed assassins your way for even being in the same room as her.”

Dorian sighed heavily and leaned against the table. “You see Varric? This is why you and Cassandra need to go and have that wild, sordid night together. That would be a story for the ages. You two have gotten along a lot better ever since you wrote that book for her. A romance book. A very smutty romance book.”

Evie giggled as Varric groaned and shook his head. She knew he was tired of Dorian teasing him about it, and somehow that made it that much funnier. She pressed her lips tightly together and looked over at Sera, who’d been sitting quietly in the corner the whole time.

Sera had a pie balanced on her knees and she looked up, sensing their eyes on her. “Wha’?” she asked and swallowed down the bite she had in her mouth. “Don’t you lot look at me. I’m single and happy. Just me and my pie,” she said and forked up another bite, making a display of popping it in her mouth. She knew this was a prime opportunity to tease Evie, and she would eventually (especially when Solas was around), but she could see that Evie was truly upset. And she didn’t want to kick her when she was down. “If you want me to kick ol’ Vivi’s arse for you, you just let me know,” she said, pointing her fork at Evelyn. “That bitch needs to be brought down a notch or two.”

“I can’t keep sicing you on people every time they bother me,” Evie said, though she greatly appreciated the offer. She took another swig of wine, feeling much better than she had an hour before. “Although, if you really insist on messing with her, you’ll hear no scolding from me.”

Sera grinned from ear to ear, a mischievous giggle escaping her. “Oh, we can come up with something gooooood.”

“Might have to do something about the Revered Mother while you are at it. We’ll probably be running interference for a while until her mother hen instincts go away. I imagine when she heard the news she had a minor heart attack. Oh, by the way Sera, have you even seen hide or hair of that snake Vivienne enchanted and sent back after you?”

Sera shuddered so violently that she almost dropped her pie. “Oh piss yeah,” she answered, setting her dessert on the table and sitting up a little straighter. “I thought she was lyin’ about that. An’ the next thing I know, the slimy thing comes crawlin’ up the fucking stairs!” She shuddered again, making a disgusted sound. “I popped that thing right quick with an arrow. But I didn’t wanna touch it, so I had to ask Krem to throw it out for me.”

“Yeah, Krem mentioned that,” Bull said as the others laughed at Sera’s story. “That thing even freaked him out a bit. He said it just wasn’t right, a snake having legs.” He sat back with a shrug, still rubbing at Dorian’s back. “If you’re gonna prank Viv again, you’re gonna need something better than a snake, Sera.”

“Really, you all don’t have to do this,” Evie said, though she giggled and hiccupped again as she reached for her mug. The thought of Sera messing with Vivienne made her overly happy in that moment. She nearly spilled her mug, but managed to get it to her lips. “On second thought, have at it.”

Sera clapped her hands and rubbed them together as she leaned forward, an excited gleam in her eyes. “Alright, so here’s what I’m thinkin’...”

* * *

 

Evie was a mess by the time she left the tavern. She felt considerably better after listening to Sera plan out her next, and potentially best, prank on Vivienne. At the same time, she felt like crap because Vivienne’s words still stung, still made her angry, and she still worried over what this would to to Solas and Cullen’s reputations. 

And she was drunk.

The others were concerned about her getting back to her room after downing a second tankard of wine. Dorian said he would escort her back there safely, mostly to keep others from confronting her the way Vivienne had. But when he went to the counter to pay off his tab, she snuck out the door and wandered up to the battlements. She didn’t want to go back to her room alone. She wanted to find Cullen, and Solas, and take them to her room with her. 

She really had taken the long way around the battlements by the time she found Cullen’s office. She cracked open the door and a little smile split her lips when she saw him bent over his desk, looking over the reports laid there. “Found youuuuu,” she giggled and slipped through the door, closing it quickly behind her as if afraid someone was sneaking up behind her. She swayed slightly on her feet, hiccupped, and giggled. “Hi, Handsome.”

Cullen looked up from his reports, glad for the reprieve, but started when he saw the state that Evelyn was in. He could hazard a couple of guesses as to why she was in such a state. After Mother Giselle had cornered him in his office, he wouldn’t have minded drinking himself into a stupor. “Maker’s breath, Evie. Are you alright?” It was a stupid question. He pushed himself up from his desk and went over to her, his hands up in case she swayed dangerously again. “Did the Revered Mother corner you as well?”

She shook her head, and had to lean back against the door when it made her dizzy. “Vivienne,” she answered, swallowing to try to keep down another hiccup. “Vivienne made a big scene in the Great Hall first thing this morning. She called me a whore.” A pout pulled at her lips for a moment as she looked down at the floor, trying to recall everything that happened. “So then I went and hid in the garden, but Varric found me. Brought me wine. ‘s all -  _ hic -  _ his fault. I blame the dwarf.”

Cullen’s heart stopped when he heard what the First Enchanter had called the Inquisitor and he reached out, pulling her to him. “She called you what?” He felt an anger coil up inside of him at the thought of that woman declaring her as such a foul name. He had heard whispers of some sort of argument in the Great Hall with the Inquisitor and the First Enchanter, but he had never suspected it would be this bad. When Evie swayed on her feet again, he made up his mind. “Come on, you need to sleep this off. I would make a bed for you here on the floor, but I think the couch in Solas’s rotunda will be much more comfortable.”

Evie nodded and leaned heavily on Cullen, letting him guide her through his office and out towards the Rotunda. “I didn’t mean to get drunk,” she muttered. “But I was soooooo mad,” she added in a loud whisper. “And then I went to the tavern, and I drank more. And now Sera is plotting against Vivienne, and I think she managed to talk Blackwall into helping her.” Oh, being outside on the battlements when she was this drunk was a bad idea. How she’d made it to Cullen’s office she would never know. She was grateful when they reached the safety of the Rotunda, though she still clung to Cullen’s side. “I’d steer clear of all of them for a few days just to be safe.”

Cullen held her tightly to his side, looking around for the elf as they stepped into the warmth of the little space. He spotted the mage painting on top of one of the scaffolds he had in the room. He wanted to marvel at the quality of the painting, but led Evie over to the large couch instead. “Here we go. Nice and slow,” he said quietly, setting her down on the couch before he took off his fur cloak and urged her to lay down before he draped it over her. “Try and sleep now. We’ll take care of everything.”

Oh, that was nice. The couch was comfortable, and Cullen’s cloak was warm and smelled like him. And she felt safe here in the Rotunda. She gave a sleepy nod, even though the room seemed to spin, and she rolled over, pulling the cloak tighter around her. 

“Is she ill?” Solas asked as he climbed down from the scaffolding, stopping to grab a rag to wipe his hands off before he walked over to Cullen. He leaned over Evie, looking her over with a concerned eye, and the scent of alcohol hit his nose. “She’s been drinking,” he said as he stood up straighter, a frown pulling at his lips. “I knew I should have gone to find her. I heard she and the First Enchanter had words this morning. I did not think that Vivienne could get to Evie like that, that she could drive her to drinking.” He sighed and reached out to smooth Cullen’s cloak over her shoulder, then turned and went to his desk. “We should have anticipated as much.”

Cullen rubbed a hand through his hair and nodded. “I should have come to find her after Mother Giselle cornered me in my own office. Though, I would be willing to bet that she used less harsh words than the First Enchanter must have used. I thought someone of her standing would have a bit more tact when it came to such situations.” He looked to the mage with a worried look, “Did the First Enchanter visit you?”

“No, but I have made myself scarce most of the day,” Solas answered as he sat down, angry at himself for not checking on Evie. He thought their conversation at breakfast had been enough to keep her from being hurt by any gossip spreading about. “Most people only look in and see that I am not at my desk and continue on. They rarely think to look up,” he said, nodding at the scaffolding. “Although I may have Dorian to thank for that. He kept leaning over the railing and calling out to Mother Giselle that she had just missed me, and sent her to various part of the castle. Happened three times. I could hear him snickering to himself all morning. Before he headed off to the tavern, that is.”

Cullen chuckled at that and smirked to himself. “I’ll have to buy him a drink later for that. Though, she got side tracked and found me instead. Said that you and I were corrupting the Inquisitor and wouldn’t be surprised if we were in a league with people like that Dorian Pavus.” He shook his head. “She said other things about you, but I stopped her, I wouldn’t hear of them.” He looked to Solas, putting a hand on the other man’s shoulder. “You are one of the most intelligent men I have ever met. To hear them speak ill of you like that… it made me very angry.”

The corner of Solas’s mouth twitched in a smile. “You do not have to be so concerned about me,” he said, “But I appreciate it all the same.” It was nice to know that Cullen cared, and he was even more pleased to find that things between them didn’t seem awkward after the night they’d shared the night before. He covered Cullen’s hand with his own and gave it a squeeze. “I really could not care less what anyone here thinks of me. It is you and Evie that I am concerned about.” He paused and looked over at the Inquisitor snoring softly on the couch. “Especially if this is the result.”

Cullen looked back to Evie and smiled at her, giving Solas a smile before he went over to sit on the arm of the couch. She was sleeping soundly and he reached down, brushing a strand of hair out of her face. “I have so much to thank you both for. I never would have thought before this Inquisition that I could even have a relationship with a mage, let alone see a future with two of them in it.” He looked over to Solas, a smile on his face. “I should thank you, both of you, for opening my eyes to the truth.” 

How was it that Cullen always managed to say the things Solas thought and felt? He sighed and looked at his desk for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts. “It would seem we are on the same page once again,” he said, finally looking over at Cullen and Evie. “I had not thought much of humans since…” He paused, catching himself. He’d almost slipped. “For quite some time. Though you have both changed my opinion. I did not expect to find that here in the Inquisition.”

Cullen offered him a smile. “Nor did I expect to find such a connection with another… well, another man. I’ve never felt for any man the way I feel for you. It’s still all very new to me,” he said as he rubbed at the back of his neck. “But I regret nothing. Last night was,” he paused, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, “very nice. I was happy to be mistaken.” 

“As am I,” Solas answered and got up from the desk. He still didn’t know what he felt for Cullen, but he knew he felt  _ something.  _ It was a relief to know that the Commander didn’t regret the previous night’s activities. He offered Cullen a smile as he came to stand next to the couch. “It is very new to all of us. And there aren’t many in this world who could understand our situation, much less offer advice on how to navigate it.” He touched Cullen’s jaw, running a thumb over his stubbled cheek. “It is up to us to figure out this relationship on our own,” he said softly, searching Cullen’s eyes for a moment before he carefully leaned in and kissed him softly.

The Commander stood there for a moment, his eyes open watching the mage before he relaxed and tilted his head into the kiss. It was soft and warm, like an unspoken promise and he could feel it curl around his heart. He reached up hesitantly before he rested a hand on Solas’s neck, thumb stroking gently at the soft skin behind his ear and he sighed with relief into the kiss. His heart pounded in his ears, but he didn’t care. Whatever this was, he was going to fight for it. For the both of them. And woe be to those who would seek to hurt either of them.

He pulled back slightly a moment later, leaning their foreheads together. He opened his eyes, meeting Solas’s and he gave him a shy smile. “I should, ah, return to work…” he said, but dipped his head back down to steal another quick kiss before he forced himself to pull away. “I shall see you both tonight then?”

“Yes,” Solas answered, then looked at Evie snoring away on the couch again. “I don’t think she’ll be moving any time soon,” he chuckled. “But I will watch over her. She will be safe.” A dark look crossed his features. “And I dare the First Enchanter or anyone else to try to come in here. I will not stand for it.” 

Cullen smiled at that. “Good. Hopefully between the rest of us and the Inner Circle, no one will bother Evie like this again. If you do happen to run into trouble, you know where to find me. I will send word to Josephine for her to instruct our First Enchanter on the importance of respecting the Inquisitor’s private affairs.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Maker, what a mess.” He looked to Evie, smiling fondly at the woman who had put all of this into motion. “I’ll send to the kitchen for some snacks that should have her back on her feet in no time.” He gave one last sweeping look to Solas before he turned and headed back to his office. There was always more work to be done.


	19. Chapter 19

“Ugh, don’t ever let me drink that much again.”

Solas chuckled at her as he helped Evie up the stairs to her room. “I believe you did that on your own without my knowledge,” he reminded her. The rest of the day had been blessedly uneventful and he hadn’t had to confront a single person, though he’d been prepared to should anyone come poking around the Rotunda looking to scold or lecture him. “Let’s get you something to eat and then you can sleep some more.”

Evie wrinkled her nose. “Bread and water, then let me sleep for a week,” she said as they tromped up the stairs. Her head was still throbbing, her stomach turning, and she thought she’d rather deal with another concussion than this bloody hangover. She paused in her steps when they reached her room. “What’s all this?” she asked, a tone of appreciation in her voice when she saw Cullen standing there. He’d piled pelts of animal furs near the fireplace, and it looked as though he had raided the kitchens as well. “You didn’t have to do this,” she said as she went to him, wrapping her arms around his waist.

Cullen smiled down at her, wrapping his arms around her waist in return, leaning down to catch her lips in a soft kiss. “Yes I did. You didn’t deserve today. You deserve so much better than you were treated and,” He pulled back a little looking back at the little set up he had done, rubbing at the back of his neck, “I thought we could give the fire place another, proper try.” He looked over at Solas and gave him a smile as well. “The cooks assured me this would tackle any hangover you might be feeling. Plus, I have the water from the well in the garden. I was thinking you might not appreciate wine again right now.”

“Nooo,” Evie said, shaking her head slowly. “No more wine for me.” It warmed her heart to see all the trouble he had gone through. And oh, the furs looked so warm and inviting, so comfortable in front of the crackling fireplace. “This is brilliant,” she said as she kicked off her boots and got down on the pelts, laying on her side for a moment. She smiled up at the two men, relieved that the day was over and that they were with her now. “Don’t just stand there.”

Solas gave Cullen a smile, then sat down and pulled Evie to lay her head in his lap. “Giving this a second try sounds like an excellent idea,” he said as he reached for a piece of bread and tore off a bite to give to Evie. He watched her chew slowly, her eyes already sliding closed. “Don’t fall asleep with food in your mouth,” he scolded softly and took a bite for himself. He held out a hand to Cullen. “Sit with us.”

Cullen chuckled and toed off his boots before he took Solas’s hand and let himself be pulled down with them. He moved towards Evelyn’s feet and drew them into his lap and started massaging out the soles, pressing his thumbs carefully into the arches of her foot. He looked across, meeting Solas’s blue eyes and he startled himself, feeling that falling sensation at the intense look that was returned to him. “Did you have any more trouble the rest of the day? I was pleasantly surprised to see our other friends dropping by to see if I was alright. Rather touching really.”

There was something in Cullen’s eyes that Solas couldn’t quite place, but it made his heart give a little jump, and he looked down at Evie to give her another bite of bread. “No one bothered us,” he answered, smiling as Evie groaned and stretched her legs out towards Cullen a little more. “It’s good that the others took time to check on you. They continue to surprise me. A few months ago, I would not have thought that they would care.”

“Oh, they love you two,” Evie said around the bread in her mouth. She rolled to lay flatter on her back, her eyes still closed as she let Cullen massage her foot. By the Maker, that felt amazing. “You’re spoiling me again,” she warned, stretching slightly and sinking down into the warm furs around her. “You know it’s not going to take much to put me to sleep.” She forced her eyes open to keep herself awake. “Will you both stay with me again tonight? I just… after everything that happened today, I don’t want to be alone.”

Cullen laughed softly as he switched to her other foot. “I was thinking that we would stay the night. This is all a bit much to set up and then leave you alone to your own devices,” he murmured, giving her a wink, “Besides, I thought you could use an evening where you were just pampered. Make certain that you don’t even remember this morning ever again.”

“I’m about ready for this to be over,” she said, sighing heavily. “The war, fighting Corypheus. I’m sick of it all. I don’t like being the center of attention all the time.” She paused, then added, “Well, unless I’m the center of your attentions. I’m perfectly happy with that.” She giggled and sat up slightly to reach for the water, taking a long drink of the frosty clean water. She smacked her lips and laid back again, another soft moan escaping her. Damn, Cullen was good at this. She looked at her hand and frowned. “Especially since I know now that this really was just an accident. I’m not special. I wasn’t chosen for this. It just happened.”

Solas’s eyes were drawn to the mark on her hand. His mark. The power from his orb embedded in her palm. A rush of guilt surged through him and he gently took her wrist in his hand. “This war cannot last forever. You have stopped Corypheus at every turn. Eventually he will be beaten and you will not have to trouble yourself with him anymore,” he said. Though what he would do once he recovered his orb was now in question. Would he still tear down the Veil to return the world to the way it was supposed to be? He didn’t know. Evelyn and Cullen had changed the way he saw the world now. He’d never felt so torn.

Cullen looked down at the dainty foot in his hands as he moved to massage the top of her foot as well, working into the lower calf. “This war won’t last forever. I admit, when we first started this venture, I hadn’t thought of much past what would happen if we defeated the Darkspawn Magister.” He looked up, meeting both of their eyes. “I find myself wondering now what will come after, but for now, I am content to live one day at a time, see what comes next. See what comes of this.”

Evie couldn’t help but to wonder what would happen after it was all over. Would the Circles be reinstated? She hoped not. She remembered Solas promising her that she would never have to go back if she didn’t want to. But what if she refused? “I don’t want to go back to the Circle,” she said, swallowing a knot in her throat. “We should just run away. All three of us. Somewhere away from it all, away from all the crap between Templars and mages. Somewhere we can hide and it won’t matter what we do because there’s no one around to judge us.”

“Shh,” Solas hushed her, working his long fingers into her hair to gently undo her braids. He didn’t like the look in her eyes, the tone of her voice. “You’ll never have to go back there. I promise.” Part of him wanted to agree, that they could go somewhere away from all the chaos, somewhere where they could just be. But he had so much work to do, so many things to accomplish before the world was set right again. He had to breathe steadily through his nose to keep his temper. It infuriated him to think of mages being locked up like animals because of their talents.

Cullen nodded. “I think we could slip away from it all when the parties die down. We’ll have to do it quickly, don’t want Leliana to find out where we are going. I swear, she is more bloodhound than human at times.” He pressed his lips together, remembering his time in the Circle and he had to suppress a shudder. “If I can help it, no one will be going back to a Circle. There has to be a better way. I never would have thought it possible before, but the two of you have opened my eyes. If only all mages possessed the level of control and clarity with which you use magic.”

“Most of them do,” Solas said, his voice a little firmer than he meant for it to sound. “Unfortunately, it is the few who give a bad reputation to the many.” He paused and exhaled slowly. Now was not a time to allow himself to get worked up. He managed a tiny smile and looked to Cullen again. “At least you were open enough to see it. That is all that matters now.” He reached over and gave Cullen’s knee a squeeze. “There are few who would be as open minded as you are.”

Cullen smiled at that and inclined his head, pausing when his eyes landed on the way Evie had turned her head into Solas’s leg, her breathing evening out and he laughed. “Oops, I think she fell asleep,” he said, setting her feet down into the furs and he leaned back, reaching over to pick up a piece of bread before he smeared some of the soft, white cheese onto it. “At least the food will keep for a while.” 

“This is what happens when we let her out of our sight,” Solas laughed and helped himself to some of the food as well, his free hand sliding into the pale strands of Evie’s hair. “She will be fine by morning.” Now that they had settled on the furs in the quiet sanctuary of Evie’s rooms, he could feel himself growing tired. He yawned and reached for another bite of food. “I fear I may not be far behind her. It has been an emotionally tiresome day. And I did not even have to confront anyone the way you did, or the way Evie did. You must be tired as well.”

“Extremely,” Cullen agreed and brushed the crumbs from his vest before he shrugged out of his shirt, stripping down until he was bare chested in the fire light. He kept his trousers on as he laid back into the furs, pulling Evie’s legs onto the lower part of his chest as he turned his head to watch Solas. “Something seems to be troubling you. Are you certain no one came to talk to you about our situation? Or is it something else?”

Solas immediately relaxed his expression, but realized it was too late. “No one bothered me today. I think most have learned it is unwise to antagonize me, save for Sera,” he said, lifting Evie’s head out of his lap so he could lay on his side next to her, facing Cullen. “I don’t like the tone of Evie’s voice when she speaks about the Circle. It angers me to see mages treated that way. That is all. Don’t worry yourself over me,” he said smoothly. He mentally shook himself. It was easy to let his guard down around the two of them and he seemed to be slipping more and more. He would have to make a conscious effort to be more careful.

The Commander smiled at that, relief flooding through him. “Well, that’s good. You’ve been through a lot too. You don’t need any more troubles on your plate. Especially after everything you’ve done for us. For the Inquisition,” he said, reaching out after a moment’s hesitation and slid his hand into the elf’s letting his thumb stroke over the top of his knuckles. “Let’s get some rest. I have no doubt we will be needing it later when she recovers.”

A shiver raced down Solas’s spine at Cullen’s words and a genuine smile pulled at his lips. He let his fingers curl around Cullen’s hand and held it. “Then let us rest for now,” he said and laid his head down, curling himself around Evie’s back, still holding Cullen’s hand as he draped his arm over her. It was almost too easy, this relationship between the three of them now that they were here. And he was finding he loved it more and more. And somehow, that scared him at the same time. He was starting to care too much, getting too comfortable with the both of them that he kept nearly slipping, letting his emotions show too much. But he couldn’t pull himself away from them. It was so rare to find anyone so accepting of him as they were. “Sleep well, lethallin.”

* * *

They were pressing in all around him, the magic barrier that the abominations had summoned caged him in like an animal, squeezing all the air out from his lungs as it grew smaller and smaller. He could feel tears rolling down his cheeks as he saw Uldred and the demons dragging away Solas and Evie from him. “NO! Not them! Please don’t kill them! Don’t you dare summon demons inside of them!” he cried out, flinching away as another demon curled around him, hissing in his ear. 

“You know what to do. You want to save them so badly? You could take their places. All you have to do is ask us. Better hurry before your loves turn against you.”

“No!” he shouted, letting his fingers curl into his hair, tugging painfully at his scalp. “Leave me alone! This isn’t real. This isn’t real!” he shouted louder and louder, trying to drown out the voice that was but a whisper yet he heard it as if it was the only thing in the room, “LEAVE ME BE!”

Solas awoke with a start, hearing Cullen shouting so loudly. He sat bolt upright, knocking into Evie in the process, summoning magic to his fingertips in preparation of a fight. His heart hammered against his ribs, but he relaxed a fraction as he saw Cullen still sleeping next to them. He placed a hand on Evie’s shoulder, seeing the fear and confusion in her eyes. “Easy, vhenan,” he soothed. “He’s having a dream.”

“A dream?” Evie asked, feeling like her breath had been stolen away. She blinked as she looked at Cullen, tossing and turning, crying out in his sleep. It sent a tremor down her spine to hear him so frightened. She’d never heard him like that before. “How do we make it stop?” she asked, looking at Solas again. “Should we wake him?”

Solas got into a crouching position on his toes and took Evie by the shoulders, moving her behind him. “Let me,” he said, recalling the last time Cullen had had a nightmare, back when Evelyn had been unconscious from her injury. “He has a tendency to lash out when awoken from a nightmare.” He jaw nearly ached at the memory. He waited and watched for a moment, then sprung, grabbing Cullen’s wrists and pinning them down so the Commander couldn’t swing on him. “CULLEN,” he said loudly and firmly. “Wake up. You’re dreaming again.”

A sob tore from Cullen’s lips as the demons pounced, restraining him. Uldred was coming towards him now with that damned spell book. “No!” he cried, feeling the tears slipping down his cheeks. “I don’t want to be unmade, please. No please, just kill me. Just kill me,” he pleaded, struggling helplessly in the grips of the demons when suddenly his world shook and his eyes opened with a gasp and he struggled harder as he saw Solas leaning over him, pinning him down. Gone was the Circle and the Harrowing chamber. In it’s place was the warm glow from the fireplace, the furs cradling his body just right and the familiarity of the Inquisitor’s rooms. Safe. He was safe. He gave a groan and fell back against the furs, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to shake the dream from his mind. “I’m sorry,” he breathed, “I didn’t mean to worry you both.”

Solas gently released Cullen’s wrists and sat back, heaving a sigh as he ran a hand down his face. Something had to be done about this or someone was going to end up hurt, even if accidentally. He moved to sit next to Cullen and extended a hand out to Evie, who looked truly shaken. “It’s alright. He’s fine. Just a bad dream,” he assured her and pulled her closer when she took his hand.

“Cullen,” she said, sitting on her knees and running her fingers carefully through his hair as she looked him over, as if she expected to see him injured from such an outburst. Maker, that was terrifying to see, to hear him screaming those things. She sucked her lip for a moment, not knowing what to say or do. She didn’t want to upset him further than she could see he already was. “Are you okay?” she asked softly.

Cullen leaned into her touch, feeling some of the tension leave his shoulders, but the beginnings of a headache were starting to appear. He swallowed thickly, his mind drifting to lyrium, how one sip would lessen his dreams and remove the pain he felt. “No, but I will be alright. The dreams come and go, without lyrium they are worse.” He lifted a hand and rubbed his face with it, looking up at the ceiling, letting his eyes unfocus. “Probably all the talk of the Circles is what made this one so strong. I… don’t exactly have the fondest memories of Kinloch.” He closed his eyes, feeling more tears slip down his cheeks at the memories and he pushed himself up, pulling away from Evelyn. “You asked me once before what happened to me in the Ferelden Circle.”

Solas exchanged a look with Evie, seeing the curiosity in her eyes that reflected his own. He had briefly seen it in Cullen’s dreams, but he didn’t know the entire story. And he hadn’t asked before, deciding that Cullen would tell him whenever he decided he was comfortable sharing. He reached out carefully and wiped away a tear on the Commander’s cheek. “You do not have to share if you don’t want to, Cullen,” he said gently. “But if you wish to share, Evie and I will listen.” He dropped his hand back to his own lap, giving Cullen space. He didn’t want to overwhelm the other man.

It killed Evie not to pull Cullen into an embrace, to hold him and tell him that everything was okay. But she noticed the way he’d pulled away, the way Solas didn’t crowd him, and she sat quietly, waiting to see what Cullen would say. It broke her heart to see the tears in his eyes. She’d never seen him so upset before. “It’s alright, love,” she said softly, “We won’t judge. You can talk to us if you want.” She pressed her lips together when Solas reached over and covered her hand with her own. She twined her fingers together with his and had to force herself to shut up.

Cullen ran a hand through his hair and he leaned forward, his elbows on his knees as he looked into the fire, watching the flames lick at the stones. “Back during the time of the fifth blight, a blood mage, Uldred, became possessed and took over the tower and everyone in it. He captured us Templars and in his madness released demons all throughout the tower and convinced several of his fellow mages to follow him.” He swallowed and closed his eyes. “I was tortured by him and his fellow abominations, forced to watch as he mutilated and murdered my brothers in arms, knowing that I would be the next one to die at his hands. Knowing there was nothing I could do. I watched as the mages and Templars both became monsters, tormenting me. Holding me down. It was all I could do to try and keep my sanity. Try to keep faith that the Maker would send help.”

He sighed and looked back over at the two of them. “After that, I never thought I would be able to trust mages ever again. After being so broken… how does one person even continue on after that? I hated myself. I carried around so much hate for the mages in the tower after that. They sent me to Kirkwall not long after that incident and being under Meredith’s command made me see how extreme I could have become. I didn’t want that either. Being with you two, seeing you both… it challenges everything I’ve learned, everything that I’ve been through… To think that at one time I would have written you off just because you were mages.” He shuddered. “I couldn’t even bear to think of it now.”

Evie was horrified to hear what he had endured. His question rang true in her own mind; how did someone continue on after that? It broke her heart to think of him being treated so cruelly. And how he was able to trust her and Solas now, both of them mages, she didn’t know. She felt tears sting the corners of her eyes and she blinked several times to keep them from falling. “Oh Cullen, I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “That’s…” She paused and swallowed, thinking there were no words to even begin to describe it. She shook her head. “That’s horrible.” The words didn’t do it justice. She slowly and carefully reached for his hand, lightly placing hers on top of his. “I wish I could take it all away,” she said, her voice still nearly a whisper.

“It is a testament to your strength that you are as you are now after enduring so much horror,” Solas said. Like Evie, it horrified and disgusted him to hear of Cullen suffering so. No wonder people feared magic and mages if stories like his spread throughout the world. “That is not how magic should be used. What madness,” he sighed and sat back a bit, his shoulders slumping. He couldn’t blame Cullen for fearing and hating mages after being tortured like that at their hands. He looked up, catching Cullen’s eyes, and placed a hand on his knee. “You know Evelyn and I are not like that,” he said firmly, though his voice was soft and compassionate. “We would never do such a thing. Nor would we allow anyone else to. We… care about you. You are safe with us. You always will be.”

Cullen gave them both a sad smile and reached out, taking each of their hands, squeezing firmly before he spoke. “I know. It hurts me to think that there would have been a time when I would have shunned this just because of that. I am certain I wouldn’t want to imagine a world without having had both of you in my life. For however long you’d have me,” he said, lifting their hands and pressing a firm kiss to their fingers.

Evie took that as a sign that it was okay to touch him again and moved quickly to wrap her arms around his neck. “You shouldn’t say things like that,” she softly scolded and pressed a kiss to the side of his neck, “Or I might not ever let you go.” She hugged him tightly, running one hand up and down his back. Her fingers caught on the scars here and there on his skin and she wondered if they were marks from when he had been tortured. It just made his story all the more real to her and she buried her face against his shoulder, wishing with every part of her that if she held him tight that she could somehow protect him from the nightmares, the awful memories.

Solas still held Cullen’s hand, giving it a firm squeeze. “Nor would I want to imagine a world without either of you,” he said in a low voice. He moved a little closer to them, his knees touching Cullen’s, just wanting to feel that connection with them again, that acceptance. He nearly shivered as it seemed to wrap around him. “You will never suffer such torment again. Not as long as I am here,” he promised.

Cullen leaned forward, pulling Solas into their three way hug and he buried his face into the man’s neck, breathing in deeply the calming scent of him, of the both of them. His soul ached, but they were like a balm for his wounds that time couldn’t touch. “Thank you,” he breathed, “You’ve no idea what a comfort that is to hear it.” He pulled back slightly, rubbing his hand up and down Evie’s back, enjoying the feeling of her small frame pressed against him. Maker, no, he couldn’t imagine being without this now. It would hurt too much.

Solas wrapped his arms around both of them, holding them tightly for a moment. “Lay down with me,” he said softly and pulled back, laying back on the warm furs. The fire was still blazing and he knew they couldn’t have been asleep long when Cullen had woken them. He reached for them, pulling Evie to lay on one side of him and Cullen on the other. A yawn split his face as he wrapped an arm around each of their shoulders, feeling content to just hold them securely. He knew he could fall asleep quickly like this and he made up his mind that he would find Cullen in the Fade, protect him from those nightmares just as he had before. He would do it every night if he had to.

Cullen turned into Solas’s chest, laying his head on the elf’s shoulder. “I’m not entirely certain that I wish to go back to dreaming again just yet,” he said quietly, looking across at Evie, meeting her gaze. He reached over, covering her small hand with his own. He almost paused then, watching the way Solas’s chest rose up and down and pulled his hand back slightly, spanning it over his sternum and fanned his fingers out. The skin was warm, firm and real, grounding him even more to reality than that of his memories. He sighed out contentedly, turning his head and pressing a kiss to the flesh there.

Something about the simple gesture sent a thrill though Solas’s body. His spine stiffened slightly and he let out a heavy sigh, squeezing at Cullen’s shoulder. “I think I could be persuaded to stay awake,” he murmured with a chuckle. He slid his other hand down Evie’s back to give her rear a firm squeeze. The corner of his mouth twitched in a smile as he felt her move against him, and he tipped his head to the side as she crawled up to suck at his neck. Feeling a little mischievous, Solas slid his other hand down Cullen’s spine and grabbed his ass, kneading at the hard muscle there.

Cullen couldn’t stop the jerk of his hips as he felt the lean fingers squeeze his backside and Maker help him, his length gave an interested twitch. He moved up, leaning on an elbow as he looked down at Solas, studying him for a moment as he watched Evie suckle at his neck. That sight alone sent more thrills down his spine. He was content to be there, so much better than the Fade. It was warm and he was content to stay awake, exploring the new relationship, the new aspects of it. There was a lot for him to get used to. He leaned down, bracing himself above the elf as he caught the other man’s lips in a pressing kiss.

Evie paused and pulled back, her breath catching and her pupils dilating at the sight before her. By the Maker, that was so damn hot to watch the two of them kiss. She thought of the night before, how hot it had been to make Solas watch while she was with Cullen, and then to make Cullen watch while she had her way with Solas. But damn it all if she didn’t want to sit back and be the spectator now. She held her tongue, knowing it would be best if they came to it on their own. Still, the very thought made and intense heat settle low in her belly, and her mouth watered.

Solas groaned against the kiss, his body waking up to the touches from Cullen and Evie, his length hardening and straining against his pants. Oh yes, he could definitely stay awake for this. He nearly gasped at that, at the realization that he was now more interested in the waking world than he was in spending time in the Fade. He pulled back from Cullen, breathless, and laid his head back with his eyes squeezed shut. “What are you doing to me?” he groaned.

Cullen chuckled and exchanged a look with Evie, his mouth watering at the look in her eyes, the way her lips shone, full. “Hopefully something you like,” he murmured and leaned over, catching Evie’s lips in a fevered kiss as well. His hands roamed over her shoulder, down to cup at her breast, giving the round globe a gentle squeeze. He looked at both of them when he pulled back, breathless. He wanted to please them, the urge was stronger than he could remember and he glanced down Solas’s body, noticing the way his trousers were tented. It was still a bit unfamiliar to him and he wasn’t entirely certain what more to do. He let his hand drift from Evie to skim down Solas’s skin, his heart nearly beating out of his chest as he skimmed his palm over the hardness.

A hiss issued through Solas’s teeth and his back arched at the touch. It was teasing, light, and the fact that Cullen seemed uncertain about it just somehow added to it all. He raised his hips against the Commander’s hand, seeking more friction, a stronger touch. He turned his face and grabbed the back of Evie’s neck, pulling her in for a searing kiss, thrusting his tongue into her mouth. He wanted her. He wanted Cullen. He wanted both of them. 

Evie moaned against Solas’s kiss, letting him suck on her tongue for a moment. Oh Maker, he could kiss. She reciprocated for several moments until she pulled away, her lips feeling hot and bruised. The way he kissed her gave her an idea and she began to tear at her own clothes. She’d probably never undressed so fast in her life. “Take your clothes off,” she ordered as she struggled to pull her pants down over her hips in her haste. “And stand up. Both of you. Now.”

Cullen blinked up at her, startled at the sudden commanding tone that she took and he pulled back from Solas, his mouth going dry as she stripped bare before them. He shared a look with the elf before he pushed himself to his feet, his hands going to his trousers and swiftly undid them, sliding them down his legs, sighing out as his erection was freed. He was grateful for the warm air that curled around him and he relished the heat from the fire as he stood there, skin drinking it in. He held a hand down to Solas to help him stand.

Solas let Cullen pull him to stand and he just as quickly unlaced his breeches and stepped out of them. He didn’t know what Evie was planning, but his cock twitched in anticipation. He looked down at her, his eyes widening as she only got to her knees and reached for both of them. Oh! His knees nearly buckled as her warm hand wrapped around his length and stroked him, slowly and firmly, drawing a deep groan from his throat.

Evie reached for Cullen as well, her hand gliding up and down his shaft a couple times before she took him in her mouth. His skin tasted clean and sweet, making her mouth water,  and she sucked at him, her hands still working over both of them. She wanted to take away the nightmares, to make him forget all of those horrible memories. She moaned as drops spilled out onto her tongue and she swallowed them down, relishing in the taste of him.

Cullen’s eyes widened as he suddenly felt her mouth surround him and he had to reach out and grab onto Solas so that he wouldn’t fall as his knees turned to jelly. “Maker’s breath, Evie,” he cried out, his fingers digging into the elf’s shoulders while one hand went down to tangle in the Inquisitor’s blond strands. Heat pooled low in his gut and he gave a soft moan as she swallowed him down to the hilt. He wasn’t going to be able to hold out for long if she went after him so adamantly.

Evie gave him another long, hard suck before she pulled away and turned her face to Solas. She nearly smirked as he gasped out when she captured his length in her mouth. This was fun, seeing how much she could make them react. And it was sexy. She shifted her hips, rubbing her thighs together slightly as her core ached for them. Her eyes rolled back in her head as she sucked at Solas, tasting the drops that leaked from the tip, and she moaned at the taste as she descended on him.

A low growl rumbled in Solas’s throat as he rocked his hips forward, watching as Evie’s lips swallowed him down. Her mouth was hot and wet, sucking hungrily at him and for a moment he thought he might come already. No, enjoy it. Let it last, he thought to himself and steeled his nerves. There was no need to rush it. “That’s perfect, Evie,” he murmured, his fingers joining Cullen’s in her hair. 

Encouraged by his words, she moved her head a little faster, taking him deeper into her mouth. She could feel him trembling ever so slightly and she knew that if she really wanted, she could probably push him over that edge. She heard his breathing become heavier, the low moans in his throat, and she suddenly pulled away. She almost snickered at the look he gave her, but she quickly turned to Cullen again. Maker, she loved this, loved this teasing little game, loved pleasuring them. Her left hand wrapped around Solas’s length again, her right hand trailing up Cullen’s side as she looked up at him, her eyes big and innocent as she let him slide as deep into her throat as he liked.

Cullen sucked in a deep breath, the cool air from the room suddenly replaced with her hot mouth was too much. Thinking of how she had those pretty lips wrapped around Solas not seconds before just sent him over the edge and he tightened his grip around the elf’s forearm as his knees tried to give out on him as he came, white hot pleasure surging through his body like a wave. “Maker,” he whimpered as he felt his cock pulse in Evie’s mouth, her talented tongue laving over him as she sucked hard.

Evie moaned and let her eyes roll back in her head at the taste of him. Damn, that just made her want them all the more. But not yet. Right now was about pleasuring them. She sucked harder at him, determined to draw out every last drop, and finally released him with a pop of her lips. “So good,” she purred, leaning in to kiss at his hip, the lower abs of his stomach. A little smirk crossed her lips as she took his hand and tugged for him to sit down beside her, her other hand still stroking Solas’s hard length. She batted her eyes at Cullen. “I think my jaw’s a little tired,” she said. “You wanna help me?”

Cullen blinked at her as he sank down onto his knees, his eyes looking towards the hard length in her hands and then up at Solas. He swallowed hard at the look in the elf’s eyes, the way that there was just a sliver of blue around the dark pupils. He rubbed the back of his neck. “I’ve never, ah, never tried this before. I’m not certain what to do aside from the obvious.” He looked up at Solas, “I don’t want to hurt you.” 

Solas shivered as he looked down at the two of them, Evie’s hand still working over his length. “I trust you,” he said, his voice shaking a bit. He didn’t expect Cullen to be as good at it as Evie, but something about the uncertainty and shyness he could see in the other man somehow made up for it. His cock throbbed in Evie’s hand and he didn’t know if he could stand there much longer. 

“Here,” Evie said and let go of Solas, moving back a bit to give Cullen room. She reached for his arm, tugging him closer to the elf, and sat on her knees behind the Commander. “I’ll teach you,” she said softly, leaning in and letting her lips brush against his ear as she spoke. “Try it. You can’t really do it wrong.”

The Commander swallowed and settled down in front of the other man, reaching up to grasp the long length, giving it a firm stroke. He remembered the night before, stroking him to completion. He shivered, leaning in and the heady scent of Solas washed over his senses, a bead of precome sat at the tip and he closed his eyes as he felt Evie pressing against his back, her sultry voice in his ear. He leaned forward hesitantly, pressing a kiss to the side of the hardness. The heat from him was almost burning and he let out a shuddering sigh as he darted his tongue out, the musky taste of Solas spreading over his tongue. He remembered how Evie did it for them and before he could think very much on it, he moved and took the elf into his mouth.

Solas felt his knees tremble, but he managed to stay upright as Cullen’s warm mouth wrapped around him. He slid his fingers into Cullen’s hair, ever so slightly rocking his hips. He didn’t want to move too much, he didn’t want to choke the poor man. “That’s good, lethallin,” he encouraged, looking down to watch his own length moving in and out of the Commander’s lips. 

A smile spread across Evie’s lips as she watched. She slid her arms around Cullen’s middle, kissing the back of his shoulder. “Relax,” she whispered, letting her hands skim over him, tracing the lines made by the muscles of his abs and chest. “Think about what feels good to you. He’ll enjoy the same,” she said, looking up at Solas and giving him a wink. “Think about what turns you on,” she said and nibbled at his shoulder, her fingers trailing back up to his chest, teasing at his nipples.

Cullen shivered and swallowed around the flesh in his mouth. He wasn’t certain what to think. It was hot, forbidden and something about that sent a wave of heat down to his groin before he let his hands trail up Solas’s lean legs, coming to rest on the man’s hips. He ran his thumbs over the hipbones that stuck out and he bobbed his head over the hardness, experimenting a little as he swirled his tongue around the head. He went down, but regretted it the next moment as he gagged when the head hit the back of his throat and he pulled back, coughing. He waved them off as they reached for him, concerned. “No no, I… I can do this.” He licked his lips again and leaned back, catching the head in his mouth again, his tongue licking up the salty drop at the tip. He was going to commit to this, he was going to give it the best try he could.

“Relax your jaw and your throat,” Evie said softly, not trying to intrude too much. She let one hand slide down his abs to tease the curls of dark blonde hair, her fingertips brushing the base of his cock. “That’s it, love.” Her core throbbed and she nearly whimpered, but swallowed harshly and remained quiet. 

Solas tipped his head back as Cullen worked his tongue over his length, swirling it around the head. His fingers tighten in Cullen’s hair at the feel of his soft, wet tongue laving at him. “Yes,” he breathed huskily. Oh, it was so hard not to thrust himself into the hot cavern of Cullen’s mouth. He swallowed and forced himself to remain still, giving the Commander control. The thought made him shiver again, his cock twitching and spilling a bit into the hot mouth around him. It wouldn’t take much more now, if Cullen could find a good rhythm. “Suck harder, please,” he panted.

Cullen whimpered against the hard flesh in his mouth, his mouth watering as a splash of come spilled into his mouth and he drank it down. The musk was oddly pleasing to him and he felt his cock twitch in response. He shifted from his seat in front of Solas, fingers digging into the man’s hips as he began to suck harder as he was instructed, feeling only slightly silly as his cheeks hollowed around the flesh. His cock gave another twitch as he felt Evelyn pressing up against his back, her breasts bouncing on his skin, her hard nipple tracing patterns over him.  He hummed around the length in his mouth.

Solas hissed, the sound turning into a low moan as Cullen sucked at him. He looked down again, watching the way the other man’s lips sealed around him, the cheeks hollowing, fingers grasping at his hips. The moan in Cullen’s throat vibrated around him, adding to the sensations, and he didn’t know how much longer he could hold back. He watched Evie as she stroked Cullen’s length, drawing another moan from the man. “C-Cullen,” he gasped, his mouth and throat dry as he felt his cock beginning to swell. “I’m so close,” he warned, uncertain if the Commander wanted to pull away at the last moment.

Cullen felt a head pooling in his gut at the moan and the lust filled voice that met his ears. A swell of pride filled him to know that he could bring the elf such pleasure. He swallowed around the length, feeling it throbbing in time with his heartbeats. He knew Solas was giving him fair warning, a chance to pull away, but he had committed to this and he was going to see this through to the end. Even if it were only once. He bobbed his head more vigorously than before, giving a surprised moan as he tasted the flood on his tongue. It was a strong, musky scent with an almost salty sweet after taste as he drank down what Solas gave him.

A growl rumbled in Solas’s throat as he came, his cock swelling and throbbing as he spilled into Cullen’s mouth. He couldn’t stop his hips from jerking slightly, though this time Cullen managed not to gag, so he didn’t feel bad for it. He was too lost to the pleasure, his toes curling into the soft furs beneath his feet, his fingers pulling slightly at Cullen’s hair. He stilled and shivered as the last tremors of the orgasm washed through him, and he was left panting. He carefully pulled back and sank to his knees, leaning over them as he tried to catch his breath. A breathless laugh escaped him and he looked up at Cullen. “Very good,” he breathed. “You learn quickly.”

Cullen pulled back, leaning into Evie’s embrace, feeling a trickle of the come spill down his lips. He panted hard, giving the elf a lopsided smile as he reached up and wiped the drop away, before he reached out and squeezed the man’s knee. “It was better than I expected,” he mused and looked to Evie behind him, seeing the look on her face. “Oh, Evelyn, you should have said something,” he murmured and slid his arms around her waist drawing her close, “Tell us what you would like.” 

“Anything,” she breathed, almost desperately. She captured his lips in a frantic kiss, moaning softly at the feel of his strong arms around her. Her head tilted slightly and she flicked her tongue against his lips, gasping at the taste of his mouth as their tongues tangled together. She could taste Solas on him, mixed with the sweet taste of his mouth that she knew well now. “Please,” she whispered against his lips, begging. “That was so hot.” She kissed him again, a whine escaping her. “I’ll take anything you want to give me.”

He felt bad for having ignored her so. She had been so generous to them and they left her wanting. He shared a look with Solas, giving the man a smile before he kissed Evie again, turning her around a second later to face the elf as he lifted her over his own length, letting her sink down on his hardness with a soft groan. He carefully leaned back on one arm, crooking a finger at Solas with the other. “Maker Evie, you are breathtaking."

Solas watched as Evie laid back on Cullen’s chest, her legs spread wide as she rocked on his length inside her. He felt his mouth water and he crawled closer at Cullen’s invitation. Cullen was right, the sight was breathtaking. He reached out and gently caressed her clit with his thumb, a smirk touching his lips when he heard her gasp. She really did deserve to be pleasured after she had done so much for the both of them. He lowered his face to her, the scent of her and Cullen filling his senses, and he moaned as he tasted her.

“Oh!” Evie cried out, her eyes going wide in surprise. She reached back over her own shoulders to lace her fingers behind Cullen’s neck. His cock was thick and hard inside her, making her ache in the most exquisite way. That alone would have been enough, but when Solas’s warm mouth sealed around her, stars popped in her eyes. “Oh Maker!” she cried as his tongue worked over her, making the heat in her belly throb, her body demanding more. 

Cullen shivered as he felt Solas’s chin bump against him as he thrust his hips up into Evie’s exquisite heat over and over again. “Maker, yes,” he sighed out, reaching up to cup both of Evelyn’s breasts, pinching and teasing at her rock hard nipples. He turned his head, pressing a long, hot kiss to the crook of her neck as he let himself dissolve into the pleasure he felt from the two of them. He felt a contentment he wasn’t certain he could have felt after such a dream without the two of them there with him. He moaned against her as he thrust harder into her. 

Jolts of pleasure radiated through her chest as Cullen teased her breasts. She could feel herself slipping, his cock thrusting harder into her, Solas’s mouth sucking and licking at her. Her fingers dug into the back of Cullen’s neck as the next moment her orgasm hit her, making her scream out in pleasure, her body clenching around him. Her vision darkened and she struggled to hold on to consciousness, the pleasure so strong, so inescapable. “YES!”

Solas sucked harder at her, tasting her as she came, her essence leaking out around Cullen’s length inside her. It was sinfully delicious, making his mouth water even more as he lapped up as much as he could. His tongue laved over Cullen as well, and he nearly smirked when he heard the man gasp. 

The sudden intense pleasure of not only having Evie clamp down on his hardness, but Solas’s tongue swiping over him had Cullen shouting out as he came a second time. His length throbbed quickly as he spilled into Evelyn as her slick body squeezed him tightly, milking him dry. He fell back against the furs a moment later, his mind reeling from the satisfaction that seeped through him, his blood simmering down to a pleasant buzz. “How did I ever live before the two of you?” 

“No idea,” Evie panted, her entire body tingling. She hissed and jumped slightly as she felt Solas continue to lick at her connection to Cullen. “Agh! N-now you’re just… being naughty,” she scolded him, sitting up slightly to look down at the elf.

Solas chuckled and finally pulled back, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. “Couldn’t help myself,” he said as he crawled up to lay next to them, pulling Evie down onto the furs between himself and Cullen. Even without his clothes, the room felt almost too warm. He looked over at Cullen, a smile on his lips. “I think we should all rest well now,” he said.

Cullen turned on his side to face them, a wonderful exhaustion finally pulling at his mind. “I agree,” he said with a yawn splitting his lips the next moment, “Mmm, hopefully, you two wore me out enough that I will be able to sleep without any more dreams tonight.” He rubbed affectionately at both of their hands. “Thank you for listening.”

“Always,” Evie answered, feeling satisfied and sleepy again. She ran her fingers through his hair and rubbed her nose affectionately against his. “You don’t have to hide anything from us, Cullen. You can tell us anything.” She pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “I’m glad you shared. I don’t want there to be secrets between us.” She looked over her shoulder at Solas and turned enough to kiss him as well. “I care about both of you. So much. Don’t ever feel like you can’t share with me.”

Damn her. Damn him. Damn them both for being so understanding, so accepting. “I know,” he said quietly, scooting closer to her, his fingers laced together with Cullen’s. There it was again, that ache to share with them what he was, what he had done. But his secrets were not the same as Cullen’s. Cullen was the victim in his memories, in his nightmares. But Solas… he was the villain and he knew it. He gripped Cullen’s hand a little tighter, snuggling more into Evie and burying his face in her hair to keep himself from saying another word. He didn’t trust himself in that moment.

Cullen smiled sleepily at the two of them, turning his body so he could curl around Evie, holding Solas’s hand close to his heart. “Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for us all. I’ll remember to check in on you both, but come and find me if anyone should bother you.” He blinked his eyes, trying to stay awake a bit longer, to enjoy the warmth of his lovers as much as he could before he had to go back into his dreams. 


	20. Chapter 20

Solas tried to work on his painting in the Rotunda, but his mind kept drifting away from his work. He kept thinking about Evelyn and Cullen, their nights spent together. It had been quite some time now since he had slept on his own. Every night he seemed to end up in Evie’s room, sometimes making love to her with Cullen, some nights just content to lay there and hold them. He hadn’t seen them yet that day and knew that they were both in the war room, working away as they usually did. Normally it wouldn’t bother him, but he found himself missing their company today.

He sighed and set down his brush, knowing he wouldn’t be able to concentrate. He wondered if perhaps he could catch them on break, steal a moment or two with them  before they had to return to work. A smirk pulled at his lips as he made up his mind and headed towards the war room. Passing through Josephine’s office, he saw the Ambassador at her desk and hoped he’d been correct about catching them in a free moment.

Quietly, he cracked open the door to the war room and peered inside. He didn’t see Evie, but there was Cullen, leaned over the table, his back to the door. Silent as a shadow, he closed the door and approached the man, seeing how deep in concentration he was. “Planning our next move?” he asked as he leaned over Cullen’s shoulder.

Cullen had been deep in thought as he studied the war map in front of him and didn’t even realize that he wasn’t alone until he heard the low voice in his ear, a purr almost. The voice he had been getting know better and better with each passing day. Still, it didn’t prepare him for the sudden shock that went through him and he jumped. “Flaming Andraste’s knickers, Solas!” He sagged back into the man as he relaxed, his body feeling too tense from such an action. “Maker, you have to be louder when you walk,” he breathed out, running a hand through his hair.

Solas chuckled and let his hands rest on Cullen’s hips as the other man leaned back into him. “Flaming Andraste’s knickers? That’s almost blasphemy,” he said, his tone amused. He turned his face into the side of Cullen’s neck, feeling overly affectionate in the moment, and nibbled at the skin there. “I have not seen you or Evie since this morning. It has been a very quiet day without the two of you,” he murmured, pressing slow kisses to his neck. “I’d hoped you might have a free moment or two.”

Cullen couldn’t stop the pleasant shiver that ran down his spine as Solas pressed up against his back firmly. The kisses on his neck tingled in a way that sent a flash of heat through his body and his mouth went dry while his length firmed at the unexpected attention. He found himself tilting his head to the side, allowing the elf better access. “I ah… Mmmn.” He tried to form words, but Solas and that tongue of his were a deadly combination. “Evelyn went to the kitchens not long ago, we are free for an hour or so. We could go to her room…”

“In the middle of the day?” Solas asked, though he very much liked that idea. He pressed himself more against Cullen, continuing to kiss the side of his neck. His own length firmed and he had to swallow harshly. Though he and Cullen had done many things together in Evie’s bedroom, the idea that formed in his head now was new. He wasn’t entirely certain he was ready for that, or that Cullen would be. But they were both clothed, here in the war room where anyone could walk in, and he knew they wouldn’t let it go that far. Not here. He gripped Cullen’s hips a little tighter and rocked his own hips forward against the Commander’s rear. “Are you certain you want to do that?” he breathed heavily in his ear.

Oh Andraste preserve him, Cullen thought as his own body reacted in kind as he felt the elf grip his hips tighter, pulling him back against the impressive hardness. He could feel the heat from the length through his trousers and a sudden wave of desire swept through him. It was a new ground for them. He had, surprisingly, become quite fond of going down on the elf, kissing him over Evie’s shoulder as they shared her body, but they had refrained from anything more intimate with each other. To be honest, he was afraid. Afraid of the unknown he supposed, but in that moment for some reason or another, it seemed very appealing. He shivered again, feeling those soft lips on his ear, the breath tickling his neck. His own length now strained against his pants and he knew there would be no way to make it to the Inquisitor’s quarters without embarrassing himself in the Great Hall. He turned his head, his lips grazing Solas’s. “What would you propose?” he asked with only a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

It was Solas’s turn to shiver and he captured Cullen’s lips to buy himself a moment to think. He moaned softly when the other man’s lips parted for him, and he kissed him with all the passion he could muster. He knew Cullen was thinking the same thing he was, but was that what he really, truly wanted? He cared for the other man, had been more intimate with him than he ever would have thought of being with any man. But that… It seemed like crossing a line of some kind and he didn’t know if he was ready. Still, as always, he liked the proposition of something new, of testing the boundaries and limits, to have something he’d never had before. He let his teeth graze over Cullen’s bottom lip as he broke the kiss, still pressing himself firmly against the Commander. “Something new,” he murmured.

How two little words could make him burn, ache, Cullen could hardly hazard a guess. This was new territory for the both of them, some unspoken agreement that they had when this whole relationship first started. He remembered the first night when Evelyn had said she wanted them both, how he wondered what it would be like to take her in that way. He supposed, as their relationship continued, he wondered what it would be like to be taken in that way, to give Solas the same as well. He experimentally pressed back firmly against him now, a jolt of heat washing through him as he felt that hardness pressed enticingly against his backside.

Solas had to bite his lip, but a moan still issued from his throat as Cullen’s rear pressed back against his aching length. It was so forbidden, yet so enticing. What would that mean for him, though? Would it change anything about him, anything that hadn’t already changed? A lifetime of mistakes had taught him not to make decisions in the heat of the moment. He turned Cullen around so they were chest to chest and he pressed another searing kiss to his lips, pulling Cullen’s hips against his own. His eyes rolled behind closed lids as he felt their hard lengths press against each other. He had to stop. He had to stop now. He broke the kiss and smiled. “I just wanted to give you something to think about the rest of the day while you work,” he said and took a step back, feeling breathless.

The noise Cullen made as Solas stepped back, he would later deny, but he whimpered the next moment, his body left cold and wanting as he raked his eyes up and down the elf’s lean body. The hardness of him was partially hidden by the way his tunic had been cut and he was envious. He drew in a shaky breath, not certain if his heartbeat would ever slow down. All he could hear was the blood pounding through his ears. “Oh, you are a Maker damned tease,” he hissed, but it came out more of a low purr. 

Solas threw his head back with a laugh, the sound light and warm. “Forgive me, Commander. That was not entirely my intent,” he said. He returned the gaze, seeing Cullen’s impressive length pressing against the front of his breeches. Yes, he would have to give this serious consideration. He gave a little jump when the door to the war room closed. “Evie!” he gasped, letting out a long exhale. He exchanged a look with Cullen, knowing she had just snuck in on them the way he’d snuck in on Cullen.

“Mmhmm,” she hummed knowingly, and walked over to the war table, carrying a plate for Cullen. “If I’d known you were here, I would’ve brought you something to eat too, Solas.” She paused, trying to fight the smirk on her face. “Or were you more interested in having your dessert first? I can leave if I’m interrupting.”

“No, you’re fine,” Solas answered, moving to wrap his arms around her as he kissed her cheek. “I already ate lunch earlier. Please, don’t worry over me.” He nuzzled into her hair, inhaling the flowery scent of it before he kissed the top of her head. He met Cullen’s eyes and smiled. “Cullen and I were just making plans for later this evening, weren’t we?”

Cullen let out the breath of air he didn’t even realize he was holding, sounding more like a loud gush and he leaned against the war table as he tried to will away his erection. Somehow, Solas already seemed calm and collected as if they had both been discussing the weather. He licked his lips, letting his gaze drink in the sight of the elf and the woman he was starting to hold so dear to his heart. “Ah, y--yes. Yes we were.” He tilted his head to the side, feeling a blush creeping across his cheeks. “You present a very interesting proposal.”

Evie was intrigued, especially after the little bit she’d seen between the two of them. “Well I hope I’m included in these plans,” she said, her tone low and sultry. She loved how close the three of them had become, how they could be so comfortable together. She turned and pressed a kiss to Solas’s lips, then picked up her fork and dug into her lunch. 

“You most certainly are,” Solas assured her. “We wouldn’t dream of excluding you.” And he meant it. Anything they did together, everything they did, he wanted it to be all three of them. Even if it meant one of them took a turn watching, as long as the three of them were present was what mattered to him. He fixed Cullen with a look. “Think about it, lethallin,” he said and took a step towards the door. He gave a slight bow. “I shall see you both this evening.”

Cullen sank back against the war table, watching as the doors swung closed behind the elf. He ran a hand through his hair, trying to calm himself. “Maker’s breath,” he huffed and stole a look over at Evie, seeing her watching him with great interest, “You ever feel like he is the one holding all of the cards in this relationship?”  

Evie smirked as she took another bite of her food and nodded. “Always.”

* * *

Solas tried to be patient as he waited for Cullen and Evie in her room, though he had learned that it was not unusual for them to work late into the night sometimes. But tonight it seemed as though they were taking forever. He knew why; he felt so anxious about what was to come that every minute seemed to be an hour. He still wasn’t sure what he wanted, what he felt towards Cullen, but he was open to finding out if Cullen was. The could experiment, explore, taking their time and only proceeding forward so long as they both felt comfortable. But that would never happen if they stayed in that damned war room all night.

He turned a little too quickly when he heard the door and heard them on the stairs. He smiled, but it fell when he saw the sullen looks on their faces. “What’s wrong?” he asked, immediately sensing their disappointment.

Cullen felt his soul being crushed a little bit more when he saw Solas standing at the head of the stairs as they climbed up. Maker’s breath, he had been waiting for them all this time. He had been looking forward to the night between all three of them, ready to explore something new, but once again, duty bared its ugly head. “It’s Corypheus,” he said as he and Evelyn reached the top of the stairs and he placed a hand on Solas’s arm, rubbing at the soft fabric, “Leliana’s spies have tracked his movement to the Arbor Wilds. The Inquisition is mobilizing the forces we have to head there tomorrow morning. Morrigan believes he is after something called an eluvian.”

“Oh,” Solas said, his heart giving a jump. He knew what they would find in the Arbor Wilds, what they were likely to discover. And especially if Morrigan was going, he didn’t like the idea of any of it. He understood now why they both looked disappointed; they would all need their rest if they were to head out at first light. He forced a small smile for them, even though disappointment settled in his own chest. “It’s alright. We will all need our energy for tomorrow,” he said, taking their hands and leading them over to the bed. Just because they couldn’t expend their energy that way didn’t mean he couldn’t take care of them. He pushed them to both sit on the bed and he knelt down to help them take off their boots. “Have you chosen your party to accompany you?”

“Not yet,” Evie sighed, groaning as he pulled the boots from her aching feet. Just standing around all day long in the war room wore on her. She flexed her toes and flopped back on the bed with a groan. “I’m so sorry. I really wanted to spend the night with you both, you know, not sleeping. But we can’t give Corypheus this advantage. We have to stop him.” She raised her head and looked down at Solas. “Did you want to join me?”

“Yes,” he answered, rubbing her feet for just a moment before he moved over to Cullen, helping him out of his boots and giving him the same attention. “You will be alright on your own this time?” he asked, thinking back to how they’d almost lost him at Adamant.

He smiled down at Solas, a part of him regretting that they had to be responsible. But the fate of the world was at stake and it had to be put ahead of their own desires. He reached down, cupping Solas’s cheek in his hand, brushing his thumb over the high cheekbone. “Yes. I know better than to try and duck out with you two not at my side. I will be coordinating the troops at different checkpoints once we reach the outskirts of the forest. Maker willing, I will not be cornered by a thousand demons this time.”

It hadn’t been a thousand demons, but Solas suspected it had seemed that way to the poor Commander, especially now that he knew what had happened to him in the past. He turned his face into Cullen’s hand, kissing at him palm. “I think it is less likely that you will encounter as many demons this time,” he agreed. He got to his feet and began to strip away his clothing. He set his clothes aside, save for his necklace, then climbed into bed and watched as Evie and Cullen did the same. He laid on his side and reached for them, pulling Evie tight to his chest and laid his hand on Cullen’s shoulder. “It is alright,” he assured them again. “We will make up for it when we return.”

Cullen turned, scooting until their legs were entwined, all three of them sharing each other’s warmth. He ducked his head, pressing a kiss to Evie’s head, then to her lips as she turned her head to him and he smiled against her before he briefly pulled back, sharing a look with the elf. “Yes we will. Somehow, we will always end up here with each other at the end of the day, after all is said and done. The both of you are more than worth fighting for. The world needs us, but I want to save it just for you two. I suppose that makes me rather selfish.”

Solas’s breath nearly caught in his throat as pain throbbed in his heart. He still hadn’t given up on his plans for this world, to tear down the Veil and set it right. And here Cullen was, saying that he would fight and risk his life to save it. For Evie. And for him. He curled tighter around them, holding them closer and he hid his face in Evie’s hair. He didn’t know what to do, how to proceed with his plans now. No. He pushed it from his mind. He would worry about that later. Right now, he needed to focus on stopping Corypheus and recovering his orb. The rest could wait.

“It isn’t selfish, love,” Evie murmured, cupping Cullen’s cheek in her hand. “Everyone has their reasons for fighting this fight. And if that’s what we are for each other, then there’s nothing wrong with that. Because the both of you are my reasons for fighting as well.”

Cullen smiled against the two of them a moment longer before he reached down and drew the warm covers up over them all. He took his time as he smoothed the edge over Solas’s shoulder and then down to Evie’s, regret that after all the anticipation, the fun from the day had been ruined. He smiled as he thought about what Solas had said to him earlier. “Well, it’s just giving us all something to think about until later, when we all return together.”


	21. Chapter 21

Just as they knew it would, the morning came all too soon. It seemed merely days ago when they had returned from Adamant, though Evelyn knew it had been weeks. Part of her wanted to lock the door to her rooms and just hide away with Solas and Cullen. But she knew she couldn’t do that, and a stronger part of her wanted to stop Corypheus. Once he was defeated, then she knew she would be able to focus on having a (somewhat) normal life. 

She felt as if she was being watched as they rode out that day. And though that wasn’t unusual, the looks felt much more judgemental than normal. But she held her head high, determined not to let it bother her. Or at least, not to let it show that it bothered her. She suspected the rumors about her relationship with the two men were circulating stronger than ever, and she didn’t miss the condescending smirk Vivienne gave her as they traveled along the road.

Even though she was surrounded by people, Evie felt rather alone. Solas had helped her choose her party for this mission, taking Varric and Blackwall with her. He was adamant that Sera or Vivienne not join them, though she thought she would never take Vivienne along on anything ever again if she didn’t have to, and he even seemed to dislike the idea of Cole joining them for this particular mission. She wondered why. Solas usually seemed to enjoy Cole’s company. It seemed strange to her that he would insist on Varric being their only option for a rogue this time.

Still, she went along with it, having no objections to Varric joining them. But once they’d left Skyhold, she hadn’t spoken to Solas since. Perhaps he was just trying to keep their personal affairs private, but he looked to be deep in thought every time she caught a glimpse of him. She wondered what bothered him so.

It was late morning by the time her curiosity got the better of her and she urged her horse forward to ride near Cullen. She gave him a small smile when he noticed her. “Everything alright here, Commander?” she asked, trying to seem at least somewhat professional.

Cullen glanced to his side as he looked to Evie, a smile spreading across his face. Traveling was tough work, especially when traveling with so many of their troops at once. He could feel a migraine starting to work its way into his head, he hoped that it would stay dormant until they reached camp for the night. “As well as can be expected. I keep getting looks from Vivienne and Leliana. Thankfully, our Inner Circle has kept everyone else at bay. Something I am immensely grateful for. Are you alright?”

Leliana was giving him looks? Evie wondered what for, though she suspected it was more for the fact that she wasn’t going to get to use him as bait anymore. “I’m fine, though I could have done with a later departure. Everyone knows how much of a morning person I am,” she answered. She casually glanced around, looking to see if anyone was really paying attention to her before she moved her horse a little closer to Cullen’s. “Have you spoken to Solas?” she asked in a hushed tone. “He seems… distant. I wondered if he’d said anything to you.”

Cullen stole a look over to the elf in question. “Now that you mention it, his brow does seem more furrowed than usual.” He looked back to Evie. “I assumed it was because last night had to be rescheduled,” he admitted and reached over to give her arm a gentle squeeze, “Most of the soldiers look about as grim as he does. I’m not certain I can blame them either.”

“Perhaps I’m just reading too much into it,” she muttered, a warmth spreading up her arm at his touch. A sigh escaped her and she looked up at the sky. “I don’t know how I’m going to be able to sleep tonight. I am so used to sleeping between you and Solas now.” She chewed at her lip as she looked forward again, the corners of her mouth turning down in a frown. “I don’t suppose we’ll be able to share a tent tonight, will we?” she asked, keeping her voice quiet. 

Cullen felt his heart fall at the look on her face, the way she looked so upset at the simple prospect. To be honest, the thought of not sleeping with his lovers after so many weeks curled up in their arms left him with a rather empty feeling as well. A sense of dread nearly filled him at the thought of sleeping alone, at what demons may come searching for him if they knew he would be walking the Fade without them at his sides. “I suppose not,” said, looking around, “People talk enough as it is… I wouldn’t want you or Solas to be uncomfortable.”

She pressed her lips thin and nodded. “That’s probably best,” she said, though she knew he was just as disappointed as she was. She licked her lips and looked at him again. “Maybe we’ll be able to steal a moment or two when we stop to make camp for the night,” she said hopefully. It made her heart ache to think of not being able to be as affectionate with him and Solas as she would like. “And I promise to make it up to you when we get back to Skyhold.”

He smiled at her warmly, feeling a heat wash through him at her words. “I would like that. On both accounts,” he clarified, feeling a blush crawling across his cheeks at the admission. It had been rather difficult to drift to sleep last night with memories of Solas’s breath on his ear, the hardness pressed against his backside when they had been in the war room. He let out a shaky sigh and looked ahead. “Let’s hope that will be sooner, rather than later.”

* * *

 

Solas had been deep in thought for most of the ride, thinking on the Arbor Wilds and what they were bound to encounter there. He kept telling himself that he shouldn’t worry, that even if somehow they discovered the temple and the Fen’Harel statues there, that none of them would put the pieces together about him. Of course, that didn’t ease the worry of the sentinels that might still be there. Would he be recognized by them? Would they say anything if they did recognize him? He could feel a headache coming on.

They stopped for water around mid-afternoon and he was grateful to get out of the saddle and stretch his legs for a moment. He hadn’t seen much of Evie or Cullen and he wondered if he could steal them away for a moment. He finally found Evie watering her horse near the river, though she was deep in conversation with Dorian and Bull and he thought perhaps he shouldn’t interrupt. He leaned against a tree, watching her for a moment, practically unnoticed by anyone else. He saw Cullen as well, and his heart gave a little skip as the Commander excused himself from a conversation with some of the soldiers and wandered in Solas’s direction, rubbing at the back of his neck as he so often did. A smirk crossed Solas’s lips and he moved more into the shadows, waiting. Without warning he reached out and grabbed Cullen’s arm as he walked by, yanking him behind the tree, and crushed their lips together before the other man could even react.

The rush of air that escaped his lungs, as well as the shout of surprise were quickly swallowed up as Cullen found himself pulled out of view from everyone and lip locked with Solas. Maker, the heat from that kiss alone was enough to make him weak in the knees as his hands scrambled for purchase in the other man’s clothes. He kissed back with just as much desperation that he could muster. He moved, pushing the elf up against the rough bark of the tree and pressed against him, his length growing hard from just a simple gesture. He tasted of clean water, hint of elfroot and some spice that was just entirely him. 

Solas’s eyes rolled back in his head, not used to Cullen being the aggressive one, but he found he rather enjoyed it. He wrapped his arms around the other man, their tongues dancing together, muffled moans issuing from both their throats. It made his heart race to think that they could be caught at any moment. And he didn’t care. Knowing that it would be days at least before they got back to Skyhold, before they would have the privacy of Evie’s room, he would steal every moment he could with either of them. He finally pulled back when his lungs burned for air, and he met Cullen’s eyes, seeing the fire in them. He smirked, and without another word, kissed him again. He groaned as he felt Cullen’s body pressing against him, and he hooked his leg over the back of Cullen’s thigh, pulling the other man even tighter against his body.

Cullen couldn’t bite back the moan of pleasure at the act and he reached down, sliding his hand under Solas’s leg, holding him up as he thrust against the other man. He whined when he couldn’t press himself closer. It wasn’t close enough. It wasn’t enough period. He trailed the kisses from the man’s lips, along his jaw to his neck, reaching up with his free hand to pull the collar of Solas’s shirt down and he buried his face against the creamy white skin, suckling a hickie to life.

Solas cupped the back of Cullen’s head, tilting his neck to the side to give him better access. The hot pleasure of Cullen’s mouth on his neck made his length firm, straining against his breeches, and he let his other hand drift down to grab Cullen’s rear. “Lethallin,” he breathed huskily. Oh, it was hard to breathe, losing himself so quickly and so completely in the other man’s embrace. He tried to swallow down a moan, but didn’t quite succeed. He knew they should stop, the others would be looking for them soon. And yet he couldn’t form the words in his mouth. He tried again, though it was as if he’d forgotten how to speak. “Lethallin… Cullen…” He groaned again as he rocked his hips against the Commander’s, feeling their hard lengths trapped between them. “We… we must stop. Not here. We cannot.”

Cullen pulled back from Solas’s neck, catching sight of the dark bruise forming on his skin before he moved, catching the swollen lips with his own as he kissed the man, his efforts redoubled. He knew they shouldn’t do this here, but every thrust, every gasp was soothing the fire inside of him. “Maker, Solas, I don’t know if I can wait until we get back to Skyhold,” he breathed against him.

“I know,” Solas breathed, his hands holding the back of Cullen’s head, and he rested their foreheads together. Oh, the ache in his body would not leave him for some time, and he knew that the rest of the day was going to be uncomfortable to say the least. He drew a long breath through his nose and closed his eyes, willing his erection away. It was no easy feat, and it took several moments before he could open his eyes again. He’d hoped that stealing a moment like this would ease the longing he felt, but instead it only seemed to make it grow stronger. “I apologize. I should not have done this to you.”

Cullen let a breath out through his nose, feeling the burn, the longing in his veins. Maker’s breath, but he was doomed. He had never felt such a desire before and he couldn’t believe he knew a time where it hadn’t existed. That there had been a time before both Solas and Evelyn there for him. He swallowed and kissed at Solas’s lips. “No. Don’t… don’t apologize for this. Don’t you dare.” He reluctantly pulled away, studying the other man’s face. “But you should go find Evelyn before we start moving again. She’s worried about you.”

“If I can pull her away from the others,” he chuckled. He leaned back against the tree as he watched Cullen go. He ran a hand down his face, letting out a groan. Oh, this trip was going to be the death of him.

* * *

 

It was already late by the time the Inquisition stopped to make camp. They set their tents and gathered around little campfires to eat quick meals before retiring for the night. Evie rubbed at her eyes as she finished off the last of her dinner, sitting on the hard ground with most of her inner circle. “I need to learn to sleep on horseback,” she muttered. “Make this trip go faster.” She looked over at her tent, letting out a long sigh. She was tired and wanted to sleep, but she really didn’t want to go lay down by herself. 

Dorian waved his hand in the air. “What? And miss all the interesting things to see while we travel? The miles upon miles of stripweed that is the Exalted Plains? The demon infested backdrops in the freezing cold South?” He smirked a second later. “Then again, perhaps you do have a point, Inquisitor. A sleeping draught could be mixed up easily enough, now we just need straps to tether everyone to their horses and we should be all set.” 

“Brilliant!” she giggled, though the sound was rather tired. “This is why I love you so, Dorian. You encourage my crazy schemes.” She leaned forward, her elbow on her knee, the heel of her hand pressed to her forehead. She really wanted to lay down, but she much more wanted to sit by the fire, here with Cullen on one side of her and Solas on the other. It killed her to have to be so distant with them, even when they were so close. A yawn split her lips and she scrubbed at her eyes. 

“Go on to bed, Boss,” Bull said, seeing her struggling to stay awake. “We’ll try not to keep everyone up all night,” he added with a mischievous grin and bumped his shoulder against Dorian’s. “The operative word being  _ try.  _ He’s a bit of a screamer.”

“Maker preserve me,” Cullen murmured, though a smile tugged at his lips as he saw the blush and huff that Dorian gave Bull before he leaned into the other man anyway. The mage deserved someone who was just like Bull, who was open about his relationship with Dorian instead of trying to hide it away like some dirty secret. He watched as Evelyn stood, feeling his heart break and he wanted to go with her. He exchanged a look with Solas and knew that the other man felt the same. “Sleep well, Evelyn.”

Solas looked to the fire, feeling disappointment curl around his heart. He knew that they wouldn’t be sharing a tent that night, but that didn’t make it any less frustrating. For the first time since he’d met Dorian, he envied him. At least Dorian could be open about his relationship (Bull made sure of that.) And he wondered why he himself, Cullen, and Evie couldn’t be open about theirs. Though to be fair, theirs was still relatively new, comparatively speaking to Bull’s and Dorian’s. He cleared his throat and looked over his shoulder at Evie. “Goodnight.”

“Night,” she muttered and turned slowly towards her tent, dragging her feet. She knew it was childish to pout, but she couldn’t help it. Didn’t everyone already know about them anyway? What was she accomplishing by keeping them out of her tent? Nothing except breaking her own heart and frustrating the both of them, as far as she was concerned. 

Dorian raised an eyebrow at the display and shot a look around the small group of friends, seeing the same expression on their faces. He cleared his throat and caught the attention of not only Evie, but Cullen and Solas as well. He addressed the latter, “I beg pardon if this comes off a bit rude, but what the hell do you think you two are doing? Go after her, you idiots. Don’t tell me you are going to be shy around us now. The cat’s out of the bag, so to speak. You look miserable enough as it is. Go enjoy what time we have before we have to be on the dreadful horses for another sixteen hours.”

Solas jerked his head up sharply at Dorian’s words. His eyes narrowed as he thought about it. Damn it all, the man had a point. He was tired of being secretive about every aspect of his life. He didn’t want to hide this anymore. Not that they’d done a very good job of hiding it in the first place, but that was beside the point. He got to his feet, his shoulders squared, and he looked at the other companions around the campfire. “Goodnight, everyone,” he said before he turned to the Commander and held out his hand. “Let’s go to bed, Cullen.”

Cullen couldn’t believe that Dorian had called them out on it and he had never been more grateful to the man. He reached up and let his hand curl around Solas’s and gave a small wave to the others sitting around the fire. “Goodnight and… thank you, Dorian,” he murmured before he turned back, looking to Evie. The smile on her face made everything worth it and he knew this was the right choice. Damn what everyone else thought. The majority seemed to approve and why shouldn’t they nab what little happiness they could before the end of the world. He chuckled, “Should have known.”

Evie nearly squealed and practically danced into the tent, flopping down on the bedroll to gaze up at them. “Maker bless Dorian and his big mouth,” she said, unable to stop the grin on her face. She reached for Solas as he moved to lay down next to her and she pulled him to her. “Kiss me, dammit,” she ordered and smothered his mouth with her own. She moaned as he kissed her back, drinking him in as much as she could. She’d been too busy with everyone else all day to have a moment with either of them and she felt starved for their affection.

Solas wrapped his arms around her, kissing her with all the pent up passion that had been building in him that day. He knew they needed to rest or they would be useless the next day, but damn it all, he wanted a few moments with them at least before they fell asleep. Her kiss was hot and sweet, and it stole his breath away. He finally had to pull away and gasp for air, and he chuckled as Evie rolled over and all but pounced on Cullen.

The Commander caught her with an ‘oof’ and a laugh pulled from his chest before he leaned in and kissed her thoroughly. “Maker Evelyn, we missed you,” he murmured against her lips before he kissed them again, sucking greedily on her lower lip a moment before he nibbled at it and slipped his tongue in, teasing her own before he drank her down, “Never thought today would come to an end.” 

“Me either,” she murmured and kissed him again, sighing happily. This was what she’d wanted all day long. Just to hold them, be held, to have that physical contact if only for a few minutes. She squeezed her eyes shut and swallowed harshly as she finally broke the kiss with Cullen, then nuzzled into him, tucking her head under his chin. “Finally,” she breathed out and reached behind her to pull Solas’s arm around her and Cullen.

Warmth spread through Solas’s entire being as he held them and he leaned over Evie to kiss Cullen as well. It was as if just the one day of being restrained made him realize just how much he had come to love this relationship. “Remind me to thank Dorian in the morning,” he murmured, holding them close, feeling sleep trying to pull at him already. “For everything.”

Cullen smiled, turning his face towards the both of them, enticing Evie to join their kiss. His heart thudded in his chest as he felt the both of them at the same time. “Maker, I’m not certain I want to go to sleep. The sooner we sleep, the sooner we have to be without each other again,” he murmured, but let himself settle against the two of them, tangling their limbs together as he pulled the covers up over them. “I can’t seem to remember a time when I didn’t have you both. I don’t want to remember a time like that.”

Evie said, “Me either,” at the same time Solas said, “Nor do I.” Evie looked over her shoulder and they blinked at each other before bursting into a fit of laughter. 

“Well at least we all agree,” Solas said as his laugh calmed and he settled into the bedroll again. A sleepy smile grew on his lips as he looked at them. He’d never would have believed he could care so deeply for two people, two humans, and for that affection to be in equal measure for both. He truly couldn’t see himself without them now, whatever that meant for the future. He closed his eyes and wrapped his arms tighter around them. “I will never let you part from me now,” he whispered, feeling protective of them, of what he had with them. “Never.”

Cullen felt the seriousness in Solas’s words and he reached over, cupping his cheek before he ran a fingertip up the delicate ear, finally brushing the man’s cheekbone. “The same goes for us both.” He looked to Evie, seeing her nod at his admission and he smiled, dropping the hand from Solas’s face to rub at his shoulder before he tucked it between them. “Perhaps once we return from the Arbor Wilds, we should take some time to ourselves. Granted that everything here goes according to plan… Maker knows if that will happen, but I’d be willing to hope.”

Evie nodded, losing herself in the warmth of their bodies, the safety she felt. “We will,” she promised, snuggling even more into the two of them. She didn’t want to sleep, knowing they had a long day ahead of them again, but she didn’t think she could keep her eyes open any longer. “No matter what happens in the Arbor Wilds, we’ll make time for each other when we get back. All three of us. Just us.”


	22. Chapter 22

Evelyn felt as though they were being watched as they walked through the temple. She wiggled the fingers on her left hand, closing and opening her fist. The mark had begun to tingle the moment they stepped foot in this place. The sensation didn’t hurt exactly, but it wasn’t pleasant either. She was ready to be done with this, to stop Corypheus and return to Skyhold. Listening to Morrigan and Solas bicker at each other through the entire place was wearing on her nerves, and it took all the self control she had not to snap at the witch. Did Morrigan really presume to know more about elvhen history than Solas? That seemed rich to Evie.

A smirk touched her lips as she heard Morrigan muse aloud about what the chamber they entered could have been used for. Though she had to admit, the place was massive. She felt she could stand there all day staring at it and still not be able to absorb all the details of the place. 

She tried to walk lightly; there was something in the air that made it all seem sacred, as though they were trespassers, and she didn’t want to offend. She glanced at her companions, Solas, Blackwall, and Varric. And along with them, Morrigan and Cullen. She didn’t know why, it was more than her romantic interest in Cullen that made her bring him with her. Something in her heart just told her to that morning, and after some arrangements were made and he fussed over every detail of their soldiers’ attacks, he’d finally agreed.

She stopped in her tracks when she noticed the tall, slender figure standing above them. Her heart skipped and she felt every muscle tense, prepared to defend herself if need be. Who was he? And how long had he been watching them? Movement over her shoulder drew her attention and her eyes widened when she saw the archers behind her party. Well piss. She looked to the elf standing before them again, and kept her mouth shut, waiting to see what he would say. She gave her hand a little shake as the mark flared up again, making her fingers tingle unpleasantly.

Cullen raised his sword as they were suddenly and quite efficiently surrounded. Elves, actual ancient elves, stood around them and the one high up on the ledge was obviously their leader, or at the very least, commanding officer. His eyes darted to Solas as he wondered if he could say anything to them to make them lower their weapons. He was sick of killing. Too much blood had been shed already and he was ready to wash his hands of the place. “Inquisitor, might I suggest we err on the side of diplomacy? Corypheus is the real threat here, I see no reason why we should fight these elves.”

“I agree,” Solas said in a quiet voice. The last thing he wanted was to see the sentinels of Mythal’s temple destroyed. He didn’t know if he could be part of that, and he hoped Evelyn would not put him in the position to make that decision. “Cullen is right. Our fight is with Corypheus. Not them,” he urged. He’d had enough for one day, listening to Morrigan prattle on as if she were an expert on things she barely understood. It was so hard to hold his tongue, to not correct her at every turn. And the best he could do was to take some satisfaction in knowing she didn’t know as much as she thought she did. “Please, Inquisitor. We do not need more blood on our hands.”

They didn’t have to do that, to encourage her not to fight. She didn’t want to fight anymore than she already had to. “Please, lower your weapons,” she said in a firm voice, her posture relaxing slightly. She looked up at the sentinel, hoping that he would agree to just let them pass through without an altercation. “We are not your enemies. Your true enemies, and mine, are out there! We do not wish to fight you.”

Abelas watched the group with trained eyes, his arms folded across his chest as the studied them. A dwarf, four humans and an… Elvhen? He narrowed his eyes and focused on the one that seemed to be the leader of the little group. The magic on her hand, he had not felt that in a long long time. “You are not like the other invaders. You bear a mark of magic that is… familiar. How has this come to pass? What is your connection to the others?”

Her hand twitched again at the mention of her mark. “We are working to stop them,” Evie answered, almost surprised at the strength she heard in her own voice. She certainly wasn’t feeling it in the moment. “They are searching for the Well of Sorrows, to take the power for themselves. We intend to stop them.”

Solas managed to keep his breathing steady and his expression calm, though his heart raced as he listened to the conversation between Evelyn and Abelas. It pained him to hear the sentinel speak, to hear his words about how the world seemed so foreign to them every time they awoke to defend the temple. It was a pain he knew all too well, himself finding the world a very strange place when he awoke just a little over a year before. This worried him. Everything about this worried him. He heard Abelas tell of how the elvhen warred on themselves, how they and not Tevinter had destroyed Arlathan. 

“Solas, perhaps he will listen to you.”

It took him a moment to realize the Inquisitor spoke to him. “What shall I say?” he asked, surprised that she would put him on the spot like that. He doubted that anything he said would sway Abelas. “Shall I sway him from a millenia of service by virtue of our shared blood? He clings to all that remains of his world, because he lacks the power to restore it.” He looked down at the floor, feeling the weight of those words. He understood Abelas more than he would voice aloud. 

Cullen looked over to Solas, the depth of his words were shocking and he saw Varric and Blackwall give him a look as well. He looked back up to Abelas, seeing the elf gazing at them with hard eyes. Defending the last of their world because it was all they knew, all that they had. He couldn’t blame them. If he was in their positions, he knew he would do whatever it took to keep his safe from any who would threaten it. He suddenly was grateful that they had taken the time to observe the rituals. He lowered his sword, looking around at the other sentinels, but they did not move an inch. “We need your help. We only seek to stop those who’ve invaded with the intent to defile your sanctuary. We knew this place was sacred, we tried to respect it as best as we could.”

Abelas pressed his lips thin. The shemlen spoke the truth, he knew. They had watched as they had taken care and time to walk the Petitioner’s path. The elf with them though, something nagged at the back of his mind, he was more than familiar. “I believe you,” he said after a moment. “Trespassers you are, but you have shown respect to Mythal. If the others are enemies of yours, we will aide you in defeating them. Afterwards, you will be permitted to leave and never return.”

Solas felt a spark of hope make his heart jump. “This is our goal, is it not?” he asked, looking to Evie again. “There is no reason to fight these sentinels.” He scowled as Morrigan opened her mouth again, speaking in a low voice to the Inquisitor, trying to persuade her. He knew Morrigan was only interested in her own goals. She didn’t care who got hurt in the process, or what it meant for the Inquisition. He heaved a sigh of relief when he heard Evelyn announce that they would accept Abelas’s offer.

For a moment, Evie thought that this was going much smoother than she’d anticipated. That is, until Abelas announced that he would destroy the well himself to keep anyone from despoiling it, and Morrigan gave a shout and turned into a raven. “Morrigan!” she called, but it was too late. She clapped a hand to her face and groaned. “Damn it all,” she muttered and turned to look at the men still with her. “Come on, before things get even more out of hand.”

Varric gave a groan as he watched Morrigan disappear after Abelas. “I’m not sure if you’ve been paying attention, Inquisitor, things are already a lot out of hand.” He watched as their guide stepped forward, carrying a large book and a staff. “Still, it could be worse. I think I’d rather have these guys on our side than against us,” he said, looking to Solas and seeing the look of utter relief on his faces. 

Cullen nodded in agreement. “I feel like I am with Abelas on this one. If he destroys the well, then Corypheus will not be able to take advantage of it. Morrigan may yet cause problems for him, we should hurry and see if we will be able to change her mind. She’s likely to start a bloody war if she does anything that I think she’s capable of.” He looked to Solas, seeing the absolutely concerned look on his face. He knew how much the elf cared for the Elvhen history and he didn’t want to see the look on his face if one woman saw to its destruction. 

If Morrigan did something foolish before they got to her… Solas didn’t even complete the thought, unable to think of a suiting enough punishment. They should not have brought her along, though he wasn’t certain how the Inquisitor was supposed to get rid of her either. He tried to focus on their goal, stopping Corypheus, and to not focus on the place around them. It hurt to walk through that place, Mythal’s temple without her company. His dear friend murdered by the ones she should have been able to trust. It made a hard knot form in his throat and he pressed his lips to a thin line, his eyes narrowing slightly as he followed the others. The sooner they got out of this place, the better.

The temple was awe-inspiring. Evie couldn’t help but to crane her neck this way and that, trying to take it all in as they followed their guide. She wanted to know what Solas thought of it all. She expected him to speak about it as they walked, but she saw the seriousness on his face when she looked over her shoulder, and she decided not to bother him. He looked very deep in thought. Perhaps he was worried about what Morrigan would do, or how things would turn out for the sentinels. She looked forward again, thinking that maybe she would ask him about it once this was all over. She felt another jolt shoot up her arm from the mark and she grit her teeth. Why was it acting up again? It hadn’t bothered her in a long time. It was all so strange.

Cullen looked back and forth, trying to keep his eyes on the walls as their guide kept opening secret panels and ushering them through. Perfect places for ambush, but it never came. More than once he could see the worried look on Solas’s face and he shared a glance with Evelyn. Something about the temple worried their lover and he longed to be done with the fighting to make certain that he was alright. He could see Evie tense as well, clenching her hand and then shaking it free a moment later. Yeah, it would be best if they left that temple as soon as possible.

They were led through the temple and out onto a balcony that overlooked the well. Evie’s eyes went wide. “The well of sorrows,” she gasped, thinking that it looked beautiful and unwelcoming at the same time. Movement below drew her attention and she saw the red Templars fighting the sentinels. Her hand clenched of its own accord and she quickly dug in her pocket to retrieve the rune designed to destroy Samson’s armor. At least it gave her hand something to do besides twitch and ache. “Hurry,” she said as she rushed down to confront the bastards serving Corypheus. She could hear Samson barking orders to his templars, the monsters he’d helped create. “Samson!” she called out, taking her staff in her other hand. She was ready to end this.

They were so close to the well now. Solas looked to the sky, searching for a sign of Morrigan. But there was no sign of her yet. Good. His attention was drawn back to the red Templars just as the Inquisitor used the rune to destroy Samson’s armor. He had little time to think about anything else as he threw himself into the fight, spinning his staff expertly. He wondered how this affected Cullen, to fight against the Templars, to know he could have gone down that same path. He would have to watch over him in his dreams that night. 

He heaved a sigh when the fight was over, but it was only for a moment. Abelas was running up towards the well - where had he come from? The others followed and he ran after them, silently wishing that this could somehow not end in bloodshed. If they got there before Morrigan, maybe everyone would walk away unscathed. He nearly knocked into the others as they all came to a stop, Abelas cornered with Evie at his back and Morrigan standing before him. “Fenedhis,” he hissed under his breath. He almost wanted to beat his head on the stones as he listened to Morrigan arguing with Ableas, trying to convince the Inquisitor to let them take the well for themselves. She had no idea what she asked.

Evelyn listened to both Abelas and Morrigan, not knowing what was the better option. She felt sorry for having come to that place, for disturbing the sentinels, even though it was Corypheus who had forced her hand. She wanted to just leave, to leave Abelas and what sentinels remained in peace. But that wouldn’t stop Corypheus from taking the well for himself. “We will not use it without your permission,” she said, though she could practically feel Morrigan bristling behind her. 

Abelas studied them for a moment longer, the witch seemed to want the power more than the Inquisitor did. Foolishly barging ahead and not even bothering to consider the consequences. “I am not certain that a mortal could possibly understand the powers contained within the well. Is that your wish then? To partake of the well as best as you can? You, witch, should heed your friend’s hesitations. The price of the well is heavy and you will become bound as we are bound, forever to the will of Mythal.” He sighed and looked to the well, “It matters little. Do as you will. My duty ends.”

“Bound? To a goddess who no longer exists, if she ever did,” Morrigan scoffed. She was tired of this old fool. As far as she was concerned, he was nothing but an obstacle to overcome. “Elven legend states that Mythal was tricked by Fen’Harel, and banished to the beyond. I see no reason to fear using the well. If she did exist, she is no longer here.”

Though he knew it was immature, Solas couldn’t stop himself from thinking  _ bitch.  _ She truly had no idea what she spoke of. He never would have damned Mythal to such a fate. And had the other evanuris not killed her, he would not have tricked them either. But they deserved it for what they’d done to his friend. He turned slightly away, gripping his staff so tight that his knuckles turned white. When he heard Abelas correct Morrigan, his eyes widened. So Abelas knew the truth at least. That he hadn’t sealed Mythal away, that she had been murdered. He turned again. “There is a place for you, lethallin… if you seek it,” he said. And there would be, once he had his orb back and set the world right. The would would be as Abelas had known it long ago, as all the elves had. “Malas amelin ne halam, Abelas.”

Abelas raised his eyebrow at the other, studying him carefully for a moment. “Elvhen such as you?” Even as he spoke it, recognition sparked in his eyes, though he did not let it outwardly show. He knew of only one soul who would say those words to him. Perhaps there was hope yet. He gave the slightest of nods to him before he looked around at the rest of the group and turned, walking away. Perhaps towards a new future.

Cullen watched Abelas leave before he looked to Solas. “What did you say to him?” he was not going to admit that hearing the elf call the other one a word he had gotten used to hearing while they were alone, naked, together, it was a bit unnerving. Still, he could see how shaken Solas was and knew the word meant much more than what he called him.

“His name, Abelas, means sorrow. I said I hoped he finds a new name,” Solas lied. He felt wretched as the words left his mouth and he didn’t quite meet Cullen’s eyes as he said it. He hated lying to them. He swallowed and looked away, wishing he could share who he was with them. Now that Abelas had told the truth, that Fen’Harel wasn’t responsible for Mythal’s murder, he wondered if that would have any bearing on how they would perceive him. If they knew the truth… He mentally slapped himself. No matter what he’d done, even if for the right reasons, he was still guilty. 

Evelyn listened to Morrigan, debating on what they should do with the well. She wasn’t sure she wanted to drink from it, yet she didn’t exactly want Morrigan to have it either. She wished Abelas had destroyed it before they’d gotten to it. She didn’t feel as if she or Morrigan were worthy of taking the well for themselves, especially since they were not elves. An idea struck her and she turned quickly. “What about you, Solas?”

“No,” he answered firmly. “Do not ask me again.”

She blinked to hear him speak like that to her, to see the challenge in his eyes. He meant it. “Alright,” she said gently, wondering why he seemed so adamant about the topic. “Then what should we do?” she asked, looking around at all of them. She wasn’t going to make a decision this big on her own without at least considering the input of the others. 

Blackwall made a face at the well. “If the witch wants it so badly, let her take it. She doesn’t seem to care much about the consequences, if there are any.” He felt uneasy. There was something about the well, a feeling like someone was watching your back and not in the good way. It gave him goosebumps. 

Varric shook his head. “Yeah, don’t ask me about this weird shit. I barely understand it. This? This is a whole new level of crazy that I don’t really want to understand.” He looked to Solas and Evie. “But I don’t think either of you should take the chance with it. Not with everything you’ve been through already.” He looked pointedly at Cullen.

“Agreed,” Solas said, nodding to Varric. “The witch is right about one thing. We should take the power of the well for ourselves.” He didn’t like the idea of Morrigan having that power, but he liked the idea of Evie taking it even less. “Whatever you decide, we must do it quickly. We must do it before Corypheus can try to take it for himself.”

Evie chewed her lip for a moment, thinking it over. If Solas thought it was a bad idea for her to use the well, then perhaps that was best. Not that everyone else’s opinions didn’t matter, but she trusted him more than anyone else on these sorts of issues. She looked at the well again, feeling her mark flaring, tingling, starting to sting, and she clenched her fist to hide the brilliant glow from it. Maybe letting Morrigan take the well would make her hand stop. “It’s all yours, Morrigan,” she said and stepped back. 

She watched as Morrigan stepped into the well and turned to face them, an almost haughty little grin on her face before she submerged herself into the shimmering water. Evie jumped back as the next moment the water surged over the sides of the well. “Morrigan!” she cried, and rushed to the other woman’s side as she lay unconscious in the middle of the now-empty well. “Are you alright?” She breathed a sigh of relief as Morrigan blinked her eyes and got to her feet, muttering a string of elvish words.

“I… I’m fine,” Morrigan said, blinking and looking around her as the voices echoed in her mind, disorienting her. “There is much to sift through.”

Cullen watched Morrigan as she stumbled around a little bit and he was suddenly relieved that Evie did not drink from the well. Her or Solas. He looked over to the elf, seeing that look on his face, almost a disgust at Morrigan. “We should move out. We’ve done what we have sought to accomplish. We need to get back to our troops, put a stop the the fighting outside of the temple.” He stopped short at the sound of pure rage behind them and he whirled on his heel, his eyes growing wide as he spotted Corypheus surging towards them. “Maker! What do we do now! He has us cornered up here!”

“The eluvian!” Evie cried as the glass came to life. “Through the mirror! Hurry!” She grabbed at his arm, tugging him as Morrigan and the others ran for the mirror. Her heart hammered in her chest, her legs feeling like rubber. She skidded to a stop at the edge of the mirror, making sure the others got through first. Her eyes widened as a figure rose up from the well, blocking Corypheus’s path. She didn’t have time to watch and she turned and leaped through the eluvian, tumbling to the floor in Skyhold on the other side. “That was too close!” she exclaimed as Morrigan returned the eluvian to simple glass. She shook all over as she got to her feet. “Way too Maker-damned close.”

Cullen’s heart was pounding as he landed in a heap on the floor of the castle, turning his head just in time to see the eluvian close, the image of Corypheus charging at them firmly placed in his head. Swallowing hard, he let his head thunk back to the floor, drawing a hand over his eyes. “Maker, that’s going to give me nightmares for ages. As if I needed any new ones.” 

Though it had been a close call, Solas felt a rush of relief hit him now that they were back at Skyhold. That was strange to him, to feel more comfortable here than in a temple he had once known so well, but perhaps it was because he’d been so worried over what might be revealed while they were there. He rubbed the back of his neck, then realized what he was doing, and quickly stopped. He reached out a hand and helped Evelyn to her feet. He wasn’t sure what to say, so he comfortingly rubbed her back.

Evie leaned back into his touch, still feeling a bit shaky. “Do you think everyone else will be okay?” she asked, looking back at the eluvian, feeling horrible for leaving the rest of the inner circle behind. She knew they hadn’t had a choice, but still. She chewed her lip, knowing that they could handle themselves and that the red Templars had been dealt with. “At least we stopped Corypheus from getting the well,” she muttered. “Thanks, everyone, for your help.” She rubbed at her face, looking between Cullen and Solas. “I knew there was a reason I asked you to come with us today,” she said to Cullen.

Cullen looked up at Evie, suddenly acutely aware that had he been fighting with the troops, Evelyn and Solas would have shown up at Skyhold and it would have taken him days, a week at most while riding alone to get back to them. “Thank the Maker,” he muttered, watching as Blackwall and Varric wandered out. Morrigan seemed to be in her own little world at the moment, still getting used to whatever knowledge the well had bestowed upon her. “I’ll send out a few ravens, let Leliana and the other forces what has happened. I’ll need to see what forces we have left here at Skyhold and make certain our defenses are secure until the troops return.”

“That sounds good,” Evie murmured and slipped her hand into his, taking Solas’s hand with her other. She tugged at them, heading towards her rooms. All she wanted to do was to hide away with them, and now she had probably close to a week to do so. Skyhold would be empty, save for a few guards and the servants. “Come on. I don’t want to waste a single minute.”


	23. Chapter 23

Cullen let out a heavy sigh as he sent away the crow with his letter informing Leliana of the situation. It felt so odd to be back in Skyhold with most of their troops and inner circle still in the Arbor Wilds. On their way up, he stopped a runner and gave him strict instructions to send a raven to the Inquisitor’s rooms. He leaned against the railing, watching the bird fly away until it was little more than a black dot on the horizon. He finally turned back and headed inside, closing the large doors behind him. He smiled, seeing that Solas had already gotten the fire crackling merrily in the fire place and he reached up, unbuckling his armor. “Well, that’s done. Hopefully in a day or two, we should see a reply from Leliana.”

“Good,” Evie said as she hurried over to help him with his armor. She rubbed at his shoulders for a minute, knowing he carried most of the weight of the armor there, and she leaned in to press a kiss to the side of his neck before she continued helping him out of it. “I don’t want everyone there worrying about where we are or wasting time looking for us there when we’re back here.” She looked over at Solas as he set aside his tunic and then collapsed back on the couch, stretching his long legs out with a sigh. “Are you alright?” she asked as she set aside the last of Cullen’s armor.

“Yes,” Solas answered, almost too easily. He could see the concern in her eyes and the corner of his mouth twitched. It was nice to know that someone cared so much for him. Two someones, to be precise. “There is just a lot on my mind,” he said truthfully. “Everything we encountered today… I just need a moment to process it all.” He managed a small smile for them and held out a hand. “Come. Sit with me.”

Cullen looked over to the other man, the hand that he held out was curled invitingly and he smiled at him as he draped his armor over the Inquisitor’s desk before he followed Evie over to the couch in nothing more than his trousers. The warmth from the fire on his bare skin was divine and he couldn’t think of another place he wanted to be more than at the side of his two lovers. He sat down on the couch with a soft groan, leaning against the armrest as he draped a leg over both Evie and Solas’s laps. “Maker, I’m ready for this all to be over.”

“You’re not the only one,” Evie chuckled, patting his leg as she leaned into Solas’s side. She smiled as she rested her head on his shoulder and Solas put an arm around her. “I don’t even know what to make of today. The ancient elves, the well, Morrigan and her shenanigans… Ugh, I don’t want to think about it anymore.” A groan escaped her as she felt Solas thread his fingers into her hair, rubbing at her scalp. “And now someone’s trying to put me to sleep,” she murmured as her eyes fell closed. 

“I can stop if you wish,” Solas offered, smirking when she weakly slapped at his chest. His other hand curled around Cullen’s ankle, his thumb firmly stroking over it. He felt like he could just sit there forever and rest with them, just quietly enjoying their company. He licked his lips and leaned his head back to stare up at the ceiling. Shouldn’t he have been more concerned about everything that had happened? It made him feel selfish to sit there in the comfort of Evie’s room, sharing a moment with his lovers while everyone else was still out in the Arbor Wilds. Then again, how long would it be before they had another opportunity like this? Possibly never. He lifted his head and pressed a kiss to Evie’s forehead, his hand moving to massage Cullen’s foot in his lap. If this was the only chance he had to truly have them all to himself, he was going to make damn sure he didn’t waste a minute of it.

Cullen sighed out, feeling the tension starting to seep out of him as he relaxed, the steady pressure of Solas’s hand on his ankle felt surprisingly good and he lifted his head up, studying the two for a moment. He remembered how they had all talked, about what they would do once they returned to Skyhold. He felt a wave of pleasure wash through him slowly as he remembered that day when Solas had pulled him out of sight behind the tree. Then that night curled up with each other in the tent. He smiled at the sleepy look on Evelyn’s face, she was exhausted and rightfully so, but he couldn’t help imagine. “We could rest for a bit, if you like?”

Evie thought about it for a minute. “I think I’d rather stay awake, if that’s alright with the two of you,” she said. She’d barely had a moment alone with either of them over the past week, stealing kisses here or there when they could, crawling into the tent at night only to fall almost immediately asleep. No, she definitely wanted to stay awake. She slid her hand up Cullen’s leg, raking her nails down the inside of his thigh before she massaged at the muscle there. She bit her lip as she let her fingertips brush over the bulge she could see, and she mischievously wrinkled her nose at him. “Unless you’d like to go to sleep instead?”

Cullen moved to sit up, her fingertips on him sending a pleasant tingling through him and he smirked at her as he fitted himself to the other side of Solas. He ran his hand over both of their legs, leaning in close to press a kiss to Solas and then to Evie’s lips. “Not until I’m certain I cannot move another inch. There was so much I wanted to say, to do to you both on the road. I would not see the opportunity wasted now,” he murmured, sliding a hand over the apex of the elf’s thighs before doing the same to Evie.

Solas inhaled sharply at Cullen’s touch and couldn’t stop his back from arching. Now that would certainly clear his mind from everything that had happened that day. He could feel his pulse beginning to race, his breathing becoming heavier at the mere idea of finally being able to enjoy his lovers once again. He pulled them both in for a kiss, sighing as he tasted them, their tongues tangling together. “Then let us not waste a single moment together,” he murmured and gently disentangled himself from them, standing to unlace his breeches as he headed towards the large bed, throwing a look at them over his shoulder.

A shiver raced through Evie and she quickly got to her feet, stripping away the rest of her clothing. Perhaps to some people, a week would not have seemed like a very long time to go without sex. But to her, it seemed like a lifetime. She beat Solas to the bed and tore the covers back, then crawled onto the bed and flopped back with a laugh. “I win,” she giggled and reached for the elf, pulling him down on top of her and smothering his mouth with her own. She stretched her arm out towards Cullen and crooked her finger at him, beckoning him to join them.

Cullen felt his mouth run dry as he watched the two of them. The way Solas pressed so perfectly into her bare skin. It was a feast for the eyes and he couldn’t wait a moment longer to join them. He stood quickly, undoing his own trousers and let them pool at his feet before he stepped out of them and walked over to the bed, his eyes never moving from the sight of them both on the bed. He knelt on the squishy mattress admiring the view for a moment before he reached out and placed a hand on Solas’s back, running his hand up and down for a moment before he swallowed harshly, cupping the other man’s rear and giving it a firm squeeze. 

Solas moaned into the kiss, his length firming already, and he shivered as Cullen grabbed his ass. He pulled back from Evie, panting slightly, seeing how red and full her lips were from their kiss. He pressed another quick kiss to those lips before he turned to Cullen, grabbing the back of his neck, hesitating only a moment before he kissed him as well. He didn’t know what he wanted first, but he knew he wanted to have both of them that night. Never parting his lips from Cullen’s, he moved off of Evie and pressed the commander back onto the bed, laying his weight over the man as he kissed him.

Cullen couldn’t stop the gasp that was pulled from his mouth as he kissed Solas fiercely, the weight of the other man on top of him was exquisite. Perhaps even more so was the heat as their hardnesses crossed and pressed so tightly against each other. Cullen was unable to stop his hips from thrusting up against the other man and he drank down the other man’s lips. “Please!” he begged, even though he wasn’t entirely certain what he was begging for. He just knew that he needed more. More of everything.

Solas loved hearing Cullen beg like that. He pressed his hips forward, grinding their bodies together, and a moan escaped his own throat. He was done dancing around the subject and he made up his mind. He knew what he wanted. He kissed Cullen again, rocking his hips forward in time with the other man’s movements, both of them hard and wanting. “You remember the war room?” he asked huskily as his hands slid down to Cullen’s hips, holding him as their bodies moved against each other. He leaned down to nibble at Cullen’s ear, his own breath catching in his chest. “Tonight, I want you in the middle, lethallin.”

Such a suggestion should have made him nervous, he suppose it did on some level, but it didn’t bother him as much as he thought it would have. Rather, he suddenly couldn’t get the image out of his mind and a picture of the war room, Evie spread out on the table while Solas pressed against him. The image made his mouth run dry and his cock twitched against the other man. “Please. Please, I want nothing more, but…” He trailed off, a hot blush spreading on his cheeks, “I’ve never done anything like this before.” 

Solas grinned, sliding his hands along Cullen’s arms to pin his wrists above his head, still thrusting his hips against the other man. “I would never have guessed,” he said sarcastically, chuckling warmly at the Commander. He leaned down to suck at Cullen’s throat, moving to suck at his ear. “I will go slow,” he promised. “I won’t hurt you.” 

Evie watched with a hungry look in her eyes, nearly trembling as she listened to them. She thought she’d never been so turned on in her life. She was already wet for them both, she could feel it between her thighs as she shifted around on the bed, just watching. Almost silently, she reached for the bedside table behind her and grabbed up the bottle of oil, wrapping her hand around it to warm it for them. At this point, she didn’t even care if she was included, so long as she was permitted to watch. Although, she corrected herself, she would really, REALLY like to be included.

Cullen shivered, his length already aching and hard at being held so securely. He feared if the elf let go, he would certainly lose himself. He whimpered and thrust up against the other man, leaning up to catch his lips again. He could feel his length between them, a bead of moisture from the tip smearing their stomachs between each other and he looked over to Evelyn. His stomach gave a jump when he realized what she had in her hand and it only served to bolden the fire in his belly. “Evie,” he breathed, voice thick with lust for her.

Evie scooted closer to them, pulling Cullen to lay on his side facing her when Solas moved off of him. By the Maker, that was incredibly hot to watch her lovers together like that. She wrapped her arms around Cullen’s shoulders, silently passing the bottle of oil to Solas in the process. Her pulse raced, feeling excited for them, and for herself to be part of this. Something told her not to rush it, to just slow down and enjoy the experience. She rested her knee on Cullen’s hip and reached down to stroke his already hard length as she kissed him. A whimper escaped her and she moved her hips closer to his, guiding his length into her body. “Oh Maker,” she breathed against his lips as he filled her.

Cullen cried out as he suddenly found himself pressing into Evie’s hot, slick body. His cock gave a twitch as he settled deeply inside of her and his arms went around her, pulling her tightly against him as he gently thrust into her. He buried his face into her neck, kissing at the fevered skin there, his body overly sensitive and hyper aware of everything around him. He swallowed as he felt Solas moving behind him and he closed his eyes as he sucked on Evelyn’s sweet flesh, his hand moving down to cup her rear and pull her tightly against him.

Solas watched them for a minute, his hand trembling slightly as he held the bottle of oil. He took a moment to calm himself, silencing any doubt about this in his mind. He wanted this, he knew Cullen wanted it as well, and that was all that mattered. He uncorked the bottle and poured a measure into his hand, stroking himself slowly as he watched them moving together, listening to the sounds of pleasure they made. He settled himself on his side behind Cullen and carefully poured more of the oil onto his hand, coating his fingers. He licked his lips and scooted a little closer, then reached out to touch Cullen’s rear, drawing his oil-slicked finger along the line of his buttocks.

Cullen had been ready for the touch, but even so, he flinched when Solas trailed a finger between his cheeks and he turned his face into Evelyn’s neck, kissing behind her ear. “Oh sweet Maker,” he breathed as he swallowed harshly. It was as if the world was boiling down to the two points of contact where he was pressed into Evie’s soft body and where Solas touched him so intimately. It made his cock harden further and he slowed his thrusts into the Inquisitor, his breathing growing harder as he felt the elf part his cheeks carefully.

Evie felt him flinch, felt his length harden even more inside her, and she slid one hand up into his hair, the other holding him tightly to her. “It’s okay. It’s okay,” she whispered to him, moving her body with his slowly and rhythmically. She watched Solas over Cullen’s shoulder, seeing the intense look in his eyes. A soft moan escaped her as Cullen’s length pressed deeply inside her and she turned her face to kiss him again, trying to distract and relax him at the same time.

Solas’s cock twitched, a drop of precum slipping down the side as again he slid his fingers along Cullen’s body, his fingertip searching. He paused when he found the ring of muscle, the opening to his body, and he gently massaged around it, watching the Commander’s reaction. He bit his lip, wanting nothing more than to slide deep into his body, over and over until they were both completely spent.  _ ‘No, take your time. Enjoy it. Let him warm up to it,’  _ he thought to himself. He pressed his finger forward, carefully working the tip of the digit into the impossibly tight ring, a moan rumbling low in his throat.

Cullen’s mouth went dry as he felt a long finger press inside of him and he paused for a moment, trying to let himself adjust to the odd feeling. He clenched around the finger a moment before he tried to relax against the intrusion. There was something about giving himself up like this to another person. Not just another person, but Solas, whom he would trust his life with. He wanted this man, his love, to have this with him. He leaned his head back, pulling Evie’s leg over his hip more securely. “Oh sweet Andraste, that’s different.”

Evie giggled slightly. “I know,” she answered, remembering how foreign it had felt to her that first time. She wanted to encourage him, but she didn’t want to talk too much either. She moved her hips against his, slowly, gasping as she felt his cock shift inside of her. “It… ngh… it gets better,” she promised in a quiet voice. “You’ll like it.”

Solas slid his finger deeper into Cullen, biting his lip at how incredibly tight his body was. He leaned in to press a hot kiss to the back of Cullen’s neck, working his finger in and out, then added a second finger and slid them slowly into his body. He worked his fingers around, searching, and paused when he felt out the bundle of nerves he knew to be hidden there. He scooted closer, his cock aching, not knowing if he could wait much longer, and he moved his fingertips over Cullen’s prostate while kissing and sucking at his neck. “Cullen,” he breathed longingly. Oh, this was torture.

Cullen groaned as he bit his lip, rocking back experimentally against the fingers inside of him. He gave a shout as he felt Solas brush over something deeply within him that made stars pop in front of his eyes and he gave a long moan as he swallowed hard. “Oh Maker, that… do that again.” He shuddered, clenching down around the intrusion.

A smile spread across Solas’s lips and he pressed harder against the nerves, watching as Cullen’s hips jerked. He withdrew his fingers, and moved to get to his knees, feeling that he couldn’t wait any longer. It was as if no words needed to be spoken; Cullen rolled to lay on top of Evie, their movements still slow and steady. Solas poured a bit more oil onto his length, his eyes rolling in the back of his head as he stroked himself, then moved to kneel behind the Commander. His heart raced, his breathing unsteady as he parted Cullen’s cheeks with one hand, the other gripping the base of his cock. He shivered as the head touched Cullen’s body, and he had to bite his lip again as he pressed himself forward. So tight… almost too tight… He leaned over his lovers, pressing forward a little harder. “Relax,” he breathed in Cullen’s ear. “Let me in, lethallin.”

Cullen felt his length twitching inside of Evie as he felt the head of Solas’s cock press against him. Maker, there was no way he would fit inside of him. The elf’s words burned his ear and he murmured an apology to Evie before he slid his hands under her hips, angling her so that he could lean forward more. He gave a cry as he felt the slick head pop in past the ring of muscle and he had to suck in a breath. “Oh Maker,” he sobbed as his body was well and truly plundered. It excited and frightened him at the same time. There was so much more to go before Solas was fully seated inside of him.

Solas let out a moan, the heat of Cullen’s body squeezing the head of his cock tightly. “So good, lethallin,” he murmured, pressing his hips forward, his cock sinking into that vice-like heat inch by inch. He grabbed Cullen’s hips, holding him steady, and planted kisses and love-bites between his shoulder blades. He couldn’t help himself, it was so erotic, so much better than he imagined. He stopped when his hips touched Cullen’s rear, most of his cock buried inside the other man. “You feel amazing,” he breathed and rocked his hips forward, thrusting into him at the same slow, steady pace he’d used with Evie.

It was all Cullen could do to hold on, sucking in breath after breath as each thrust from Solas stole it again. His body pressed forward, the elf effectively controlling the pace at which he thrust into Evelyn and he buried his face against her again. It was tight, he felt like he was being stretched so wide, Solas splitting him open as his hips came to rest against his ass. Sweet Maker, each thrust passed over that spot inside of him and he saw white hot pleasure. To be sinking into Evelyn’s slick heat was just the icing on top, and he moaned out, squeezing down tightly on Solas’s cock.

Evie thought she might lose her mind, feeling the weight of both of them on top of her. She could watch both their faces and felt Solas’s thrusts through Cullen’s body. Damn, she couldn’t think of anything more exciting to her in that moment than this and she lifted her hips as much as she could to Cullen, squeezing her body around his thick cock, feeling it jerk and twitch inside her. 

“Breathe,” Solas reminded Cullen as he slid himself in and out, taking his time, enjoying it. All week long he’d thought about this, mentally prepared himself, built it up in his mind. He was not about to rush through it. He pressed his hips firmly against Cullen’s rear, rocking against him for a moment before pulling far back, only to slide in again. Oh, so much better than he’d imagined. His hand slid up Cullen’s arm to cover his hand, their fingers interlacing. His other hand sought out Evie’s and they tangled their fingers together as well. There was something about that, something that made it more intimate and emotional than just purely physical, and it nearly brought tears to Solas’s eyes. He buried his face against the back of Cullen’s shoulder and thrust into him a little faster, feeling his control beginning to slip.

Cullen couldn’t stop the whimper that escaped his lips. Never before had he felt so held, so cherished. He squeezed back at both of their fingers as he thrust into Evelyn the best he could. He cried out as Solas began to pick up the pace, his own body responding in kind. He could feel himself draw up, his cock so hard and full, ready to spill. It was taking everything that he was not to come already. He had no idea that it could feel like this, feel this good. It filled a spot in his chest, and he nearly sobbed at how much he had been missing it. “Please,” he begged, “Please, I’m going to come. Harder. Please do it harder!” He squeezed as tightly as he could around Solas, making him seem giant within himself. 

Solas’s eyes went wide a moment before he squeezed them shut.  _ ‘Oh Cullen, don’t tell me that,’  _ his mind scolded, feeling his control slipping even more. Hearing the Commander beg for it, feeling his body tighten, it was more than Solas could take. He squeezed their hands tighter as he gave in, snapping his hips forward sharply, again and again, faster and more forceful with every thrust. His cock swelled, right on the edge of orgasm, but he was determined to bring Cullen to climax first. “Come for me,” he commanded, panting, feeling a bead of sweat trickle down the back of his neck as he drove himself into Cullen’s body. “Come for me, lethallin.”

He should have been embarrassed at how readily he came at Solas’s words, but he couldn’t find it within himself to be that when his world boiled down to the points of his lovers, where he connected with them so perfectly and his body seized around Solas as he pressed himself forward into Evelyn, his cock throbbing as he came with a shout. His body wouldn’t stop as he poured himself into the Inquisitor and he squeezed as tightly around Solas as he could manage. “Evie! Solas!” he cried out, his hips thrusting on their own accord.

Evie threw her head back with a cry as Cullen thrust forcefully into her, the liquid heat from him filling her body, triggering her own orgasm. She could barely breathe, her body pulsing in time with his, and she clung to them as she rode out the waves of pleasure that threatened to overwhelm her. “Oh Maker,” she choked out, clenching around Cullen’s cock as he continued to come inside her.

Cullen’s body was so tight around his cock, Solas had no choice but to give in to the pleasure. He came with a roar, slamming his hips against Cullen’s rear, his body pouring into the Commander’s. Over and over his cock jerked and spilled until there was absolutely nothing left for his body to give. “Ngh,” he whimpered as his movements finally slowed and stilled, and he was left panting and shaking. A stream of elven words poured from his lips, praising his lovers, murmuring against Cullen’s hot skin. He didn’t know if he had the strength to move after that.

Cullen felt like he could just melt into the mattress after they still. Solas’s hot essence warming him pleasantly from the inside out and he gave a pleased groan as he felt the elf settle over him and he smiled into Evelyn’s skin. “Mmmm, I’m not certain if I can form very many coherent thoughts right now.” His body was sore and he knew that walking would be an interesting venture later on, but for now he was content to just lay there and bask in his lover’s warmth. Something about the words Solas spoke just then, they reached into his heart and curled protectively around him. “I love you both. So very much.”

A smile split Evie’s face as she looked at Cullen and she cupped his face, searching his eyes. She’d wanted to say it before, but she’d been afraid of scaring them off. Her fingers curled behind his ear, her thumb dragging across his cheek as her heart swelled to the bursting point. “I love you too,” she breathed and kissed him. “Both of you.” It felt amazing to say it out loud. What it meant for them, what would come next, she didn’t know. All she knew was that she never wanted to be separated from them, that she couldn’t see her life without either of them, and that all three of them made each other happy.

Solas’s eyes widened at Cullen’s words, at Evie’s words, his heart racing even faster than it already was. He hadn’t expected to hear that. Was he supposed to respond? He didn’t know if he was ready to say that. His heart warmed to hear them say it, but ached at the same time to know that he was keeping secrets from them, lying to them. He pressed a firm kiss to the back of Cullen’s shoulder, the pulled out of him with a groan and fell to his side, a smile spreading across his face as he looked at his lovers. 

Cullen shivered as he felt Solas slip from him, he felt a trickle of liquid follow the elf and his cock gave a twitch as he pulled back from Evelyn and rolled to her other side, laying back with an oof. “Maker, you two are going to be the death of me. I’m not certain I can walk right now,” he groaned, but turned his head to look at them both. Part of him was sad that he hadn’t been able to look at Solas during their joining, to see his face. Perhaps they would have to do so again. 

A chuckle escaped Solas’s throat. “My apologies, lethallin,” he said, reaching across Evie to take Cullen’s hand. “But you were amazing.” He felt bad that Cullen was sore, but not bad enough to regret it. A long sigh escaped him as his breathing slowly leveled out, though he was still trembling slightly from it all. He nuzzled into Evie, breathing in their scents mixed together, calming him. And to think that they had a week of this without meetings to interrupt their time, no missions to go out and complete. It was more than he could ever hope for.

Evie settled into the bed, biting her lip as she recalled the expressions on their faces. It was an amazing thing to see, though she wished she could’ve gotten an outsider’s view of it as well. She grinned slowly, feeling she could be completely open and honest with them now without scaring either of them away. “Next time, I want to sit back and watch the two of you,” she said.

Cullen laughed, squeezing Solas’s hand. “She’s an insatiable little minx, isn’t she?” He turned his head, pressing a firm kiss to Evelyn’s soft cheek, smiling against her as he peered over to Solas, studying the man’s strong features. “But I think we could do something about that for you,” he murmured before he closed his eyes and curled around her, still holding the elf’s hand.

“Most definitely,” Solas agreed, watching them as they drifted off to sleep. There was so much on his mind, he didn’t know if he could fall asleep so easily that night. He almost envied Cullen and Evie, how they could be so open about themselves while he felt he had to hide. Though he knew it was his own fault, it felt incredibly unfair. Unfair that he felt the compulsion to lie to them, that he had to hide, that he didn’t feel worthy of their love. That because of the things he’d done, he knew he would lose them if they found out the truth. And that fear kept him from telling them he loved them as well. It made his heart ache all over again. He felt his eyes sting and he had to clench his jaw hard as he watched them sleep, his loves, two people he never expected to fall in love with, and yet here he was. He curled tighter around them, squeezing his eyes shut, and whispered, “Ar lath ma.”


	24. Chapter 24

Solas didn’t sleep long and it wasn’t a restful sleep. He blinked awake, a smile pulling at his lips when he saw his lovers still dozing lightly next to him, the firelight casting the most beautiful warm glow over their skin. He shifted in the bed as his body awoke more than his consciousness, and before he even thought about it, he reached out to touch Evie, running a hand down her curves, marvelling at the smoothness of her skin. He did the same to Cullen, his hand tracing the hard muscles of his side, pausing to draw his thumb over his hip. Curiosity grew in him as he wondered what it had been like for Cullen, wondering if he himself would enjoy it as much as the Commander had. 

He bit his lip as he thought about it. Evie had said she would like to watch, hadn’t she? There had been many times when he had taken Evie while Cullen watched them, or when Cullen had had her as Solas watched. It seemed only fitting now that she should be given a show. He swallowed and let his hand drift lower to curl around Cullen’s soft length, stroking it slowly and gently. A heat pooled low in his gut as he felt it start to firm in his hand, and he smiled as Cullen blinked awake.

Cullen stretched deliciously as a warm pleasure sparked in his gut and he looked over to the elf, smiling sleepily at the other man. He groaned softly and thrust up into the grip on his cock. “Mmm, morning er…” His eyes darted to the windows that were now dark, “Or evening?” He shook his head and sighed out as he looked to Solas. “Whatever time it is, it’s good,” he murmured and reached out, running his hand up and down Solas’s arm affectionately. “I see Evie isn’t the only insatiable one in our little group.”

“You have no idea,” Solas chuckled and lowered his head to nibble at Evie’s neck. The heat from Cullen’s cock in his hand was searing and he felt his own length firm in return. “Evelyn,” he purred, smiling as she turned towards him and opened her eyes, blinking sleepily at him. “I believe you wanted to watch, did you not?” he asked as he reached behind him on the bed, his hand searching, finally closing around the little bottle of oil. He passed it to Cullen, still nuzzling into Evie’s neck. “I don’t think you want to miss this.”

She blinked again, his words finally registering in her foggy mind, and her eyes widened. “Oh!” she said and scooted under his arm, then crawled over him to lay on the other side. She sat up, leaning her shoulder against the headboard so she could watch them, suddenly feeling very much awake. She knew the look in her eyes was probably too excited, too hungry, and she didn’t give a damn.

Cullen let his fingers curl around the bottle of oil and he felt a jolt of excitement surge through him. He was feeling a little better about this now, having already had Solas inside of him and knowing how amazing it felt to be had. “I’ll go slow at first. I want to make certain that I don’t hurt you…” His face blushed crimson red. “I’m a fair bit ah… thicker than you.” 

The admission sent a shiver up Solas’s spine. He was starting to love that blush on Cullen’s face just as much as Evie did. He scooted closer and cupped Cullen’s cheek, pressing a tender kiss to his lips. “I know you will,” he said as he moved to lay on his back, tugging at Cullen to move over top of him. He wanted to be taken, to give up all control to the other man. If just for a little while, he didn’t want to be in control. His hand curled around Cullen’s length again, stroking the hard flesh. “I trust you.”

Cullen’s mouth went dry at the sight before him, to see Solas spread out for him with his hand on his cock. “Sweet Maker, the things you do to me,” he breathed before he leaned over, bracing himself above the other man as he kissed him firmly. He sat back on his heels then between the other man’s legs, throwing Evelyn a look as he popped the cork to the oil bottle. He poured a measure into his hands before he set it aside and looked to the elf again. His heart was surely going to pop out of his chest if it beat much faster. His eyes trailed down over his body to the firm cock resting on his taut stomach. He looked further and reached forward, brushing his fingers over the crease between his legs. Maker help him.

Solas drew a sharp breath through his nose, his back lifting slightly from the bed. He bent his knees, spreading his legs a bit more for Cullen as his heart raced in his chest. In spite of himself, he felt a blush of his own spread across his nose and cheeks, all the way up to the points of his ears. The feel of being touched there was so strange, so foreign, forbidden, and it excited him more than he cared to admit. He stretched his arms over his head, watching Cullen with a searing gaze. He wasn’t entirely sure what he would feel, what he should expect, and somehow that made it all the more exciting. His cock twitched, leaking a thick bead of precum from the tip and he shifted his hips slightly as Cullen’s fingers brushed over him again.

Cullen swallowed thickly, his gaze drawn to the, for lack of a better word, elegant cock. He reached out with his free hand and curled his fingers around it as his other hand delved deeper. He traced the ring of puckered flesh with his middle finger a moment, spreading the oil around as he watched Solas’s cock, stroking it slowly, watching as the precum beaded at the tip. In a moment of inspiration, he leaned over and sealed his mouth around the tip as he pushed his finger into the other man, nearly gasping at the tight heat that closed around him.

Solas’s eyes flew wide as Cullen’s hot mouth closed around him and the finger slid inside him. His hands scrambled for purchase, finally bunching into the sheets, his toes curling as the sensations hit him all at once. “Fenedhis!” he cried out when he finally found his voice. He groaned as the Commander sucked at his cock, that slick tongue working over his hardened flesh. Little stars popped in his vision as he felt the fingertip brush over something highly sensitive deep inside him, and it made him nearly whimper. It was a strange, though not unpleasant, feeling and he rocked his hips experimentally. “Yesss,” he breathed, letting himself relax a bit, trying to get used to the sensation.

Cullen moaned around the length in his mouth, this at least was familiar to him and he smiled around him as he felt and heard the elf cry out. He twirled his tongue around the tip, drinking down the droplets that spilled forth as he crooked his finger inside of the man in a come hither gesture. He rubbed at the spongy area inside of Solas that seemed to make him writhe the most before he pulled back and pressed in another finger. “Maker,” he murmured, pulling back from the length a moment, “You are so tight, love.”

Oh, Evie couldn’t just sit there and watch. It was too hot, making her center burn and ache. She bit her lip as she shifted on the bed, her hand trailing up the inside of her own thigh, running her fingertips over her wet sex. She kept quiet, watching with that hungry look in her eyes as Solas writhed and bucked in Cullen’s grasp. The tiniest little whine escaped her as she rubbed at her clit, unable to stop herself.

Solas squeezed his eyes shut, his heart swelling to hear Cullen call him that. There it was again, that intimate feeling that this was more than just physical pleasure, and it made him want Cullen all the more. “Please,” Solas begged, swallowing harshly to try to even out his voice. He felt spread wide already on just those fingers and he could only imagine what it would feel like to have Cullen’s cock inside him. He raised his hips slightly from the bed, opening his body more to the Commander. “I need you,” he said, locking eyes with Cullen. “Please, ma lath.”

His breath was stolen away to hear Solas of all people beg him in such away and he withdrew his fingers, fumbling for the bottle of oil before he spilled a measure over himself, groaning out as the slick fluid coated him and he scooted up towards Solas, hooking one of the man’s legs over his elbow before he reached down, his thumb pressing against the ring of muscle before he pressed his head against the opening. Maker, it was like pressing against a wall. He eased forward slowly, feeling the muscle start to give when all of a sudden, the head popped in and he threw his head back as a tight heat clamped down around him.

A burn settled into Solas’s backside and for a moment, he questioned his decision. He grit his teeth, trying to swallow down a whine, his breath gone. He gasped out as Cullen slipped into his body and he let out a long exhale, willing his body to accept it, to relax into it. He opened his eyes again, meeting Cullen’s with a determined gaze. “More,” he breathed, feeling the muscles of his body quivering. He groaned as more of that impressive girth pressed into him, spreading him wide, spearing him inescapably. The pleasure returned when Cullen’s thick length pressed against his prostate and suddenly the pain only intensified the pleasure. “Cullen… you’re so big,” he breathed without even thinking.

Cullen couldn’t stop the laugh that was forced from his lungs, even as Solas squeezed the air from him. It was just so unexpected, the last thing he had thought he would hear. “Maker, you are so tight.” He grit his teeth and pushed forward with a small snap of his hips, becoming fully seated inside the other man, his ass pressed flush against his hips. He could feel his cock throbbing in time with his own heartbeat, with Solas’s. It was an exquisite torture he hadn’t known before. He felt a blush crawling over him as he swallowed, waiting for the elf to become used to him, but he pulled back a little and slid back inside, his eyes rolling in his head at the tightness.

Solas thought he might go crazy from it all, the intense pleasure mixed with a bit of pain, his body throbbing around the stiff flesh inside of him. He reached for Cullen, pulling him down to kiss him. He desperately plundered the Commander’s mouth with his tongue, clinging to him as he rocked his hips up to meet Cullen. The motion was different than what he was used to and it took him a moment to figure it out. But once he did… “Oh!” he gasped against Cullen’s lips, bucking up again, harder, driving the cock harder against the sensitive spot within him. He bit at Cullen’s lip and pulled back, hissing through his teeth. “Harder,” he commanded. “I am not glass, Cullen. You won’t break me.”

Cullen managed a nod against him before he kissed him harder, pulling back a second later to lift Solas’s legs over his shoulders. He thrust harshly into the other man, setting a quick pace. He was going to lose his mind with how tightly Solas’s body clenched at him, making everything ten times better. He could feel his toes curling from the sheer pleasure of it all as he snapped his hips into the other man as he bent him in half.

Solas’s breath was stolen away at the position. He was helpless to escape, even if he had wanted to. He moaned out wantonly as Cullen drove into him over and over again. His cock was so hard it hurt and he wrapped his hand around it, stroking, trying to relieve that ache. Precum seemed to pour from the tip in a continuous stream, slicking his grip, and he moaned louder as he stroked himself faster. He clenched down around Cullen, making him seem even bigger, and he gave a sob of pleasure. “Ma lath! I’m going to come!” he cried, his eyes screwed shut, his pleasure reaching a breaking point.

Cullen groaned. “Look at me, Solas. Look at me when you come. Don’t… ngh… don’t deny me this,” he half-pleaded, half commanded as he reached down between them, curling his fist around Solas’s hand and helped him stroke his cock. By the Maker, it was so slick with his cum already. “You are beyond amazing, you feel so good on me,” he cried out as he leaned over and caught his lips, kissing him passionately as he thrust once, twice more. He pressed in as far as he could go, shouting out as he came, meeting Solas’s blue eyes as he did. His cock throbbed as he spilled deeply inside the other man, tears spilling down his cheeks at the sheer intensity of his orgasm.

Solas came at the same moment, his body clamping down around Cullen’s cock as it jerked and poured into him. His own cock emptied over his chest, the glistening rivers trailing over his skin, and he cried out as the pleasure just continued to crash over him, wave after wave. He never tore his gaze away from Cullen’s warm brown eyes, seeing the passion and the intensity in them. He felt boneless as the last drops of cum slipped from the tip of his cock, still held tightly in Cullen’s grip, and he wrapped his arms around the other man as they relaxed back into the bed. “Don’t cry,” he whispered, holding him tightly, Cullen’s length beginning to soften inside him and he felt an ache that he knew wouldn’t leave him anytime soon. And he loved it. “That was incredible, ma lath,” he murmured.

Cullen smiled at him, moving to ease the other man’s legs from his shoulders before he rested on top of the other man, not caring about the sticky cum between the two of them as he kissed at Solas’s lips, sucking on the bottom one before he nuzzled at the man’s chin. “Maker, it was incredible,” he breathed, feeling well and truly spent before he turned his head to look over at Evie, “Did you enjoy the show?”

“Oh, remember me?” she teased, throwing her head back with a laugh. In truth, she was as breathless as they were, her hand still lingering near her sex, her essence glistening on the insides of her thighs. “That… was amazing to watch,” she breathed and moved to lay down next to them, pleasure of her own doing still singing through her veins. 

A smile split Solas’s face to know that they had turned her on enough that she was able to reach her own orgasm. He cupped the back of Cullen’s neck, just holding him, feeling the hot seed starting to leak out around their connection. It still baffled him that they had come to this, but he didn’t want to think about it anymore, about how he had almost walked away from this amazing relationship. He pressed a kiss to Cullen’s forehead, feeling affectionate and perhaps a bit reckless. “Ar lath ma,” he murmured, reaching for Evie and pulling her close to them. “Both of you.”

Evie’s brow furrowed, not understanding the language. “What does that mean?” she asked, letting her hand reach out and rub at Cullen’s back.

Solas’s expression softened, feeling his heart race a bit. “I love you,” he answered softly.

Cullen lifted his head, studying the other man’s face. A silly smile spread across his lips. “You said that before,” he murmured before he lifted himself off of the elf, kissing at his lips once more before he turned to Evelyn and did the same. He moved off the bed, unable to stand the feeling of the cooling cum on his body and he went to the wash basin to fetch a cloth for both himself and Solas. He cleaned himself up first, tossing the soiled rag to the floor before he returned to bed, climbing into it before he tended to the elf, taking care to gently wash him.

Solas gave a little jerk as the cool water washed over him, but a sigh escaped him the next moment at the tender gesture. The coolness of the rag felt good on his fevered skin and it took him a moment for Cullen’s words to register. “I did?” he asked. He felt himself pale as he recalled earlier when he’d muttered it as he’d fallen asleep, and a heated blush quickly rose to his face. “I… I thought you asleep,” he admitted, looking away. Damn. He’d meant for it to be, well, something more when he said it to them for the first time, not when he’d just been testing the way it felt on his lips. 

Cullen exchanged a look with Evie before he smiled at Solas and lifted a hand to his chin, turning the elf back to him. “It was perfect. You are perfect,” he said quietly, looking to Evelyn, “You both are. What have I done that pleased the Maker so much that he blessed me with the two of you?” He turned and tossed the rag away, not caring where it landed and he gathered Solas into his arms, reaching for Evelyn as well. “It’s a shame this week isn’t going to last forever. I’m rather liking this opportunity for it to be just us.”

“Me too,” Evie sighed, settling against Cullen’s side. “You know, we could run for it. We could have a week’s head start on them. They’d never find us.” She frowned the next minute. “No, Leliana would find us. And drag us back here kicking and screaming.” She snickered at the mental image that invoked. “Well, we’ll just have to enjoy it for as long as we can.”

Solas felt a little better, though he was bothered by the fact that he had read the situation wrong earlier. What if he’d said something else, something more revealing? The thought made his stomach ache and he turned into Cullen’s side, trying to calm his mind. Damn it all. He slid a hand across Cullen’s chest, coming to a rest on Evelyn’s shoulder. He could feel the muscles in his jaw twitching, the words on the tip of his tongue, dancing dangerously with the impulse to tell them everything. This was becoming too much, trying to keep secrets from them. He propped himself up on his elbow a bit to look at them both a little better. “I want to tell you something,” he said, his pulse racing, his throat going dry and tight. “I…” 

_ ‘No. No! NO!’  _ his mind screamed at him. 

He pressed his lips thin, then managed a small smile. “I’m so grateful that we all gave this relationship another try. This is the happiest I’ve been in a long time.” Ugh. He wanted to smack himself. So close, and then he’d lost his nerve at the last second.

Cullen felt a warmth spread through him at Solas’s admission and he cupped the back of the man’s neck, stroking gently at the skin there, “It is the same for me. I never would have thought it possible that three people could share something like this. I’ve been alone for so long, resigned myself to a future with nothing in it. Now, once this is all over, I would like very much to discuss what happens after. I won’t want to part from either of you. No matter what.”

Evie nodded adamantly. “No matter what,” she echoed. “The three of us will be together when this is all over. Whatever you want to do, wherever you want to go, I will follow. This is… the two of you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. And I will not lose this. I will not let go, no matter what we face. And I am done hiding it. Let them gossip. Let them whisper. I will not be ashamed of this, now or ever. I love you. The both of you. And I am proud of it.”

The defiance in her voice made Solas swell with pride and he leaned over to kiss her, cradling her head carefully as he pressed his lips to hers. “No more hiding,” he agreed softly, though even those words made his heart ache. He didn’t want to think about the future. He wanted to live in the now, to enjoy this while he could. Because he knew that eventually, he might have to walk away from them so he could fix everything he had ruined. The thought made him want to cry and he quickly laid down at Cullen’s side, curling tighter around his lover, a long sigh escaping him. He hated himself.


	25. Chapter 25

Evie awoke the next night to a jolting pain in her hand. She sat up with a hiss, gripping her wrist as the mark flared. The fire had died down, but the glow from her hand lit up the room enough that she could see Solas and Cullen still sleeping soundly. As quiet as she could, she climbed out of the bed and flicked her other hand at the fireplace, the flames blazing again. The light flooded the room, allowing her to see her hand properly.

“Oh piss,” she gasped, her voice cracking. The mark looked worse than it ever had before. Besides just the glowing part in her palm, the veins of her hand were alight with the same greenish glow, giving her hand a sickly look. She flexed her fingers, slightly relieved to find she could still use them. A sound from the bed drew her attention and she spun around quickly to see Solas moving. She held her breath until he settled a moment later, still asleep. She didn’t want to wake them and she wandered out to the balcony, her mind racing as to what to do.

All day long, her hand had bothered her. Unpleasant tingles seemed to dance along her every nerve, like her hand falling asleep, but stronger. She’d tried not to show it in front of Cullen or Solas. She didn’t want to worry them. But it was starting to worry her. It hadn’t felt like this since she’d first woken up after the Conclave. She remembered what Cassandra had said, that the mark was killing her. And how Varric had told her that Solas had kept the mark from killing her while she slept.

Was that what was happening to her now? Was the mark trying to kill her again? The idea frightened her. There were lots of people who wanted her dead. Lots of creatures out in the world that threatened to maim or kill her and her companions. But none of them, not even Corypheus, scared her like this did. She had stopped Corypheus on several occasions. She’d faced the red Templars, destroyed demons, hunted dragons. But the mark on her hand was something she couldn’t fight.

A shaky, almost silent sob escaped her as she leaned on the balcony railing. She bowed her head, cradling her hand to herself. “Maker, please,” she prayed, her voice nearly a whisper. “Please, make this stop.” She swallowed, knowing she didn’t pray as often as she probably should, that she wasn’t as faithful as Cassandra or Cullen, but she did believe and she tried to be good. “Please don’t let this take me away from them. I’m finally happy, or at least as close to being happy as I’ve ever been.” Her face screwed up and tears leaked from behind her closed eyes. “I don’t want to die,” she whispered shakily. “I don’t want to die.”

Cullen shifted in his sleep, curling tighter around Solas as he rested his head on the other man’s cheek, his hand tucked around the man’s chest. He smiled contentedly before he realized Evie was not in front of them any more, the cold spot on the bed the only clue. He blinked open his eyes, realizing it was still dark. With a groan hi pushed himself up, untangling himself from Solas while he glanced around the room. He spotted Evelyn out on the balcony, the green from her mark illuminating the area with an eerie glow. “Evelyn?” he murmured and pushed himself out of bed, grabbing his cloak as he passed it and wrapped it around himself before he went outside. 

She gasped and whirled around, tucking her hands behind her back when she heard his voice. “Cullen,” she said, using her unmarked hand to quickly brush away the tears on her cheeks. “I, ah, you startled me,” she said, closing her hand to try to hide the glowing light, and she leaned back against the railing. She sniffled and cleared her throat before she looked up at him. “I couldn’t sleep. Thought I’d come out here for some fresh air,” she said. It wasn’t a total lie, and she really didn’t want him to worry over her. He had enough to worry about as it was.

“Your mark is glowing.” He winced and smirked at himself. “There I go being obvious again. Seems to be my theme as of late.” He looked over his shoulder at Solas still asleep in the bed. His body ached deliciously in all the right ways and it was a pain he knew he could get used to. “Why is your mark flaring up? There isn’t a rift nearby, is there?” he asked, drawing her into his arms and rested his chin on her shoulder as he looked out over the mountains.

She leaned into him, closing her eyes and taking comfort in his embrace. “I don’t know,” she answered. She squeezed her fist closed, trying to make the overwhelming tingling go away. “Ever since we stepped into the temple of Mythal, it started… doing this. I don’t know what it means.” She swallowed and pulled back from him, deciding she wouldn’t be able to hide it for long. She brought her hand up and opened her fist, showing him the way the veins in her hand were glowing, like the mark was spreading through her blood. “I don’t know what to think.”

Cullen’s eyes widened as he saw how the mark was spreading and he swallowed harshly as he reached out to gently cup her arm in his hands as he looked it over. It looked sickly, but he was fairly certain that was exactly what Evelyn did not want to hear in that moment. He brushed his thumb over a green vein, studying her expression. “That doesn’t hurt?” he questioned. “Solas might know more of what to do. He did stop the spread when you first fell out of the Fade. Though, it looked nothing like this.”

She managed not to wince when he touched her hand. “It doesn’t hurt,” she said, though the sensation was strange and unpleasant. It didn’t exactly hurt. She gently pulled her hand away from him, looking behind him at Solas sleeping soundly in the bed. “I hate to wake him,” she muttered, but she was so scared of what it meant, she thought it was worth it. She took Cullen’s hand with her good one and pulled him inside behind her, going over to the bed. “Solas,” she said, shaking his shoulder.

He blinked awake, immediately sensing that something was wrong. He could see it in her eyes, the worry, and the concern in Cullen’s. “What is it?” he asked as he sat up. His heart nearly stopped when she held out her hand wordlessly to him. The mark was starting to spread again. “Fenedhis,” he cursed and gently took her hand in both of his, studying the glowing veins, the way the mark flared and flickered. This was his fault. It was his magic embedded in her palm, magic no mortal could bear for too long. Not even a mage. “When did this start?”

“At the temple. I felt it starting to flare up, but I thought once we left there it would stop,” she said, her heart racing at the look on his face. He didn’t look happy at all. And that concerned her even more. “But it didn’t. I… I think it might be getting worse.”

Solas knew that he wasn’t strong enough to take the mark away. He’d have done so already if he were capable. He concentrated, a pale blue light forming around his hands as he tried to stop it, just as he had done before. His brow creased when it didn’t immediately work, and he pushed harder, trying to force it back, make it stop spreading. It wasn’t until he heard Evie hiss and her arm jerked in his grasp that he looked up, saw the look of pain on her face, and released her hand. “I’m sorry, vhenan,” he apologized. He hadn’t meant to hurt her. With a huff he leaned back against the headboard, crossing his arms and looking up at the ceiling as he tried to think this all through.

Her hand stung and ached, as if Solas’s magic had angered the magic in her palm. “Damn it,” she hissed, cradling her arm to herself. She slowly wiggled her fingers, the pain subsiding, and a new fear seemed to curl around her heart. “You can’t stop it like you did before?” she asked.

“It seems not,” he answered, still looking up at the canopy overhead. His voice sounded distant, even to himself, as he tried to think of how to stop the mark now. It had grown more powerful in the time since she’d walked out of the Fade at Adamant. And yet he felt no more powerful than when he had awoken from uthenera. “There must be a way…”

Cullen swallowed and looked down at Evelyn’s hand. Worry filled him, but he could only imagine what it was that Evelyn was feeling in that moment. He ran a hand through his hair and rubbed at the back of his neck as he looked at the mark on Evelyn’s hand. He moved to sit on the bed, pulling her down into his lap. “There has to be a way to stop it,” he murmured, looking at it again, but a question burned on his lips, “Solas… what happens if, if we are not able to stop it?”

Oh, Solas didn’t want to answer that question. He remained silent as he tried to think of a way around it. And then he mentally kicked himself. More secrets, more lies? He swallowed harshly. No, there were enough things he was keeping from them as it was. He would not add to the list. And they deserved to know the truth. “It will continue to spread,” he answered, finally looking at them again. “It will kill her.” At the looks on their faces, he sat up straighter, leaning closer to them. “I will not let that happen,” he swore fiercely. 

Evie wanted to believe him. Truly, she did. But his words frightened her and she gave a little squeak. “I hate this mark,” she hissed, looking down at her hand and clenching her fist again. The mark flared as she did it, and it just made her scowl all the more. “Damn Corypheus! This was his doing! I didn’t ask for this! I…” She trailed off in a growl. “Sorry,” she muttered a moment later, rubbing at her face. “This is just… scary to me.”

“It is frightening to us all. This doesn’t just hurt you, love, it hurts the both of us as well. I know we won’t rest until you are safe from whatever this mark is.” Cullen licked his lips. “Solas, There has to be a way to stop this. We just… Evie, we just now found you. There’s no way I’m going to let this mark take you from us.” He held her tighter. “If it comes down to it, could we just,” tears slipped down his cheeks at even thinking it, “remove it?”

“No,” Solas said, a little too quickly. He drew a breath, calming himself. “The mark is still needed to close the rifts. Without it, we may have no hope of defeating Corypheus.” It broke his heart to see his loves so upset like this, knowing he had caused it. Still, he knew there had to be a way to recover the magic and keep Evie alive and whole in the process. “You remember I told you the orb Corypheus carries is of elven origin? From your recovered memories in the Fade, you know that the orb is what bestowed the mark upon your hand. If we defeat Corypheus and recover that orb, I believe the magic can be transferred back into the orb.” He placed a hand on her knee, giving it a comforting squeeze. “I will not let this take you.”

All Evie could do was nod her head. She hoped Solas was right, that it could be removed if they stopped Corypheus. Cullen’s suggestion of amputating her hand frightened her almost as much as being killed by the mark did. Still, it was the better option than dying. She leaned back more into Cullen, taking some comfort in his strong embrace. She reached over her shoulder to cup the back of his neck, holding him. “I will be alright,” she promised, though she didn’t know if it was true or not. “Let’s just hope I can stop Corypheus before it spreads much more.”

Solas got to his feet and began to dress. “I’ll make you a potion that will help with the discomfort you feel,” he said as he laced his breeches. He was too unsettled to sleep now. There was a nervous energy in him and doing something would keep him from feeling completely helpless, which was a feeling he despised. And he’d felt it far too much as of late. His fault. This was all his fault. He was so angry with himself, his hands shook and he could barely tie the laces. “Fenedhis,” he cursed, scowling as he dressed. There had to be a way to fix this. There just had to be.

Cullen reached out with his free hand, giving Solas’s shoulder a squeeze. “That’s a good idea. I’ll send for a bath. Perhaps a late night snack as well. I’m sure we could all use it,” he said, kissing at Evie’s neck before he lifted her up and set her down in the middle of the bed, drawing the covers up over her. “Let us take care of you for a while,” he said, smiling at her. He would not let this cause her any more distress than it had to.  

“Okay,” Evie said in a small voice. She wasn’t certain what to think. She wasn’t used to being doted upon, and she didn’t want to seem like an invalid because her mark was acting up. She looked uncertainly from Solas, who seemed even more upset than she was, to Cullen who seemed determined to prove that she was going to be okay as if he could will it to be if he just tried hard enough. “You really don’t have to-”

“Let him,” Solas interrupted. He pulled his shirt over his head, and his necklace, feeling worried and stressed. He needed time to think, time to plan, to sort this all out in his head. And he couldn’t be distracted if he was to save her. “Cullen, take care of her,” he said, his voice more commanding than he meant for it to be. “If you need me, I’ll be in the Rotunda. I’m going to make that potion for her. Perhaps there is something in the library that might help.” He sighed, rubbed at the back of his head in an irritated sort of way, and stomped off, cursing under his breath.

Cullen watched after the elf. “He seems more upset than I would have thought he would be. He’s normally so calm, collected.” He looked to Evie, smiling at her as he cupped her cheek. “You seem to bring out the best in us.” He brushed his thumb over her cheekbone. “You have enough to worry about as is, let us do this for you. We just found you. I’ll be damned to let you go without a fight,” he said fiercely, leaning down to kiss her passionately, “Now, you most definitely deserve to be pampered after such a night.”

She managed a smile for him, deciding it was useless to argue. And a hot bath and some food did sound good. “Alright,” she said, giving him another kiss. “If you insist.” It really did warm her heart to know that they cared so much. And it helped to ease her fear. If there was a way to fix this, to stop the mark from spreading, she knew Solas would find it. She trusted him. She had no reason not to.


	26. Chapter 26

Solas thought he might drive himself to madness as he worked, trying to find a way to stop the mark on Evie’s hand from spreading. He still held out hope that one they stopped Corypheus that the power might be transferred back into his orb. But in the meantime, he had to keep it from spreading, keep it from killing her. He spent every waking moment he could pouring over books, searching the Fade at night as he slept. Nothing he found seemed even remotely helpful. There had never been a situation like this before, a mortal bearing the magic of an elvhen. It made him feel helpless.

He knew he’d been somewhat distant from Evie and Cullen, and he didn’t mean to, but the more the answer to the problem eluded him, the harder he worked to solve it. At least he had one small victory - he’d been able to create a potion that helped ease the discomfort in Evelyn’s hand. But that wasn’t enough. It wasn’t nearly enough. This was his fault. His mistakes had done this to her, his love, and if he lost her to this somehow he would never forgive himself. 

He paced back and forth across the Rotunda, carrying the book he and Cullen had traveled to the crossroads to purchase. He’d read it through twice before and now he was reading it again, thinking perhaps there was something, some small detail he’d overlooked that might give him a clue as to how to fix this. He rubbed at his eyes with one hand, trying to alleviate the itching there. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept. He could feel a muscle working in his jaw; the Inquisition forces had returned the day before and now that the castle was full of the sounds of people again, he found himself more and more irritated. Didn’t they realize how annoyingly loud they all were? Didn’t they know he had important work to do that required the utmost concentration? 

“Fenedhis!” he cursed and threw the book at the wall. He turned and grasped the edge of his desk, his patience at a breaking point. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to calm himself. There was no answer to be found. Their only hope lay with the orb, and he didn’t know if he could count on ever actually recovering it from Corypheus. Once again, he was going to pay an awful price for his mistake. “Damn it all.”

Dorian normally could put Solas to the back of his mind and pay him barely a thought, but ever since he had returned to Skyhold with the others, the elf had been on a mission. At the sound of a book hitting the wall and a curse drifting up to his ears, Dorian peered over the railing to see a rather broken and desperate man. Not exactly what one would have expected from someone who had an entire week alone with his loves. “Solas, my dear friend, if you aren’t careful you’ll walk a hole into the floor with all the pacing you are doing. And I’m afraid that table will never be the same with the way that you are gripping it.” He turned and headed down the stairs, approaching the elf with caution. He could see stubble on the man’s jaw and his brow furrowed. “What’s wrong? I don’t think I could ever recall a time when you were so worked up.” 

Solas shook his head and waved his hand dismissively at Dorian. He didn’t feel like listening to anyone at the moment. He quickly realized that Dorian wasn’t going away and he heaved a sigh, finally looking up at him. “I cannot find the answer I am searching for,” he answered truthfully. He stood up straight, pinching at the bridge of his nose. “There is nothing of use in the library. Even the Fade does not hold the answer I seek. It is… frustrating.” He dropped his hand with a sigh; that had to be the understatement of the year. “I apologize if I disturbed you,” he muttered and went over to pick up the book he’d thrown, a frown crossing his lips when he saw that the corner of the cover was dented.

Dorian watched him, an eyebrow raised for a moment while he listened to him explain. He grew concerned as he saw the look in his eyes. “Well, you know what they say. Two heads are better than one. Perhaps I could assist you? If you refuse, then at the very least, I insist you take a momentary break for food, a shave, and possibly some sleep with your paramours.” He walked over to Solas, resting a hand on the other’s back. “What has gotten you so restless? Did something happen while we were away?”

“The anchor, the mark on the Inquisitor’s hand, is flaring up,” Solas answered, trying to make it sound less serious than it actually was. He knew Evelyn didn’t want everyone fussing over her; Cullen was doing enough of that as it was. “It is frustrating to not understand why. This is my area of expertise. And yet I have no experience with this unique situation.” He sighed and returned to his desk, setting the now damaged book down. “Never before have I failed to find the answers I need in the Fade.” A knot formed in his throat and he swallowed hard, though it didn’t quite alleviate it. “I have failed her,” he admitted quietly.

“You’ve done nothing of the sort,” Dorian said, “Without you, she’d have died back when this whole mess began. You’ve been working hard ever since then to keep her alive and I’d say that you’ve done a fine job thus far. I wish it were more my area of expertise, but I’ll look into a few things. Perhaps the mark is acting more like a disease than it is magic…” He tapped his chin thoughtfully. “That I could help you with. Something to do with the spread of plagues and such, I shan’t bore you with the details.” He quieted a moment later, seeing the rather sober look on the elf’s face. “There’s more to it, isn’t there?” He pressed his lips thin, knowing that there were things everyone kept to themselves, but he had to wonder just what it was that had their Fade expert positively shaking in his boots.

Solas didn’t respond. He went still as a statue, staring hard at a point on his desk, not wanting to give anything away. He was so exhausted, it would be far too easy to slip. But Dorian wasn’t stupid, he saw something there and Solas knew he wouldn’t be easily fooled. And there was part of him that so wanted to just drop the charade, to be free of the lies and the secrets. “May I ask you a hypothetical question, Dorian?” he asked, finally looking at the other man. “If someone you cared for was keeping a secret… something that affected you directly, and you found out the truth… how would you respond?”

Dorian blinked at the rather odd question and he leaned against the table, bitter memories of his father rising to the surface. He spoke quietly as he thought about the question and different circumstances, “I suppose it would depend on the secret. And the person that I cared for. When I found out that my father was secretly plotting to do a blood ritual on me, I was furious. Hurt that someone who was supposed to care for me, support me could turn on me with such a horrible intent. I’m still not certain if I can forgive him, but thanks to Evelyn, that door is still somewhat open. Perhaps… eventually, I suppose is the answer I would give you.” He sat up straighter. “After a time of course. I had to be hurt and upset first. Run away and all that lovely business. The why could help a lot, knowing why someone was keeping a secret might make all the difference in the world. Not that I could understand my father’s reasoning. Bad example.”

That was what Solas feared. The fury, the hurt that it would cause if Evie and Cullen knew that this was all his doing. And not to be heartless, but he rather thought that Dorian’s issues with his father were rather small by comparison to his own mistakes. If Dorian still could not forgive his father for that, then what chance was there that Evie and Cullen could forgive him for what he had done? Her life was at risk because of him. Ever since she touched that orb, since this all began, her life was at risk. “Perhaps some things are better off unsaid,” he muttered, more to himself than to Dorian. He ran a hand down his face, feeling the unfamiliar stubble under his fingers. “Thank you for your honesty, Dorian.”

He nodded, hesitating a moment as he pushed himself to stand once more. “I’m not certain if it was a comfort or not. You have to ask yourself that question and be honest. If you were in this hypothetical person’s shoes, would you forgive the person who has wronged you? And no, you don’t get to reason and say, well of course, or well no. There are so many factors you have to calculate in. If you really were that person, not yourself, would you forgive? Could you?” He chuckled sadly. “Maker, I can be confusing at times. I swear there’s a point in there somewhere. Now, for my next advice, go bathe and spend some time with your loves. It will do you and them some good, I am certain of it. I’ll see what kind of research I can turn up that might help you out. And for Andraste’s sake, eat something. I could hear your stomach all the way up on the third floor.”

* * *

Though he knew Dorian was trying to help, Solas felt even worse, if that were at all possible. He thought over their conversation. Would he forgive someone for doing what he’d done to the world? His answer was a resounding no. He could not even forgive himself, how could he expect anyone else to forgive him? The idea was ludicrous. He felt like screaming, like he was going to burst if he didn’t let this out somehow. The guilt was quickly becoming overwhelming. 

As the tromped up the stairs to Evelyn’s room a couple hours later, he toyed with the idea of just coming clean. He didn’t know which would hurt more, losing both of his loves, or continuing to live with these lies and secrets. Was there even the slightest chance that they would hear him out, let him explain that it was a mistake, that he hadn’t meant for all of this to happen? Over the time he’d spent with them, he knew both Evie and Cullen were kind, compassionate people. But he didn’t know if they were forgiving enough to accept this. 

He came to a stop at the top of the stairs when he saw Evelyn packing a bag, Cullen helping her but looking worried at the same time. “Are you leaving?” Solas asked, thinking that if she was going out on a mission, he ought to go with her. He didn’t want her on her own out there, not with the mark acting the way it was. 

Cullen looked over to Solas, his heart fluttering at the sight of him. Evelyn and he had missed the elf something terrible. He looked a little worse for wear too, Evie’s hand must have really been eating away at him. “I can’t talk her out of it. She’s decided to go on a trip to the Hinterlands, close the last of the rifts there before… anything should happen.” He swallowed harshly and looked back to Evie, “You should let Solas go with you at least. I don’t know what I would do if you were lost to us out there.”

“Dorian will be with me,” Evie said as she closed her pack and turned to look at Solas. She was tempted to take him along, but he looked exhausted. “When was the last time you slept?” she asked him, her brow creasing with worry. She shook her head the next moment. “You’re too tired to go anywhere, I can see it on your face. I can’t take you with me and risk you getting hurt out there.”

“Let me come with you,” Solas insisted. Though he knew she spoke the truth. He’d pushed himself too hard in trying to find the answers he needed, and he’d exhausted himself in the process. He managed to stifle a yawn, but just barely. He sighed the next moment and swore under his breath as he sat down on the couch in her room. Could he do nothing right? He pressed the heel of his hand to his forehead as he leaned over his knees. 

“I’ll be alright,” Evie promised both of them. “I can’t just sit around and do nothing. I have to keep working. The rifts aren’t going to close themselves and the demons are going to keep hurting people. Besides, the fresh air might be good for me.” She grabbed her staff and slipped it into the harness on her back, then picked up her pack.  “Really, I’ll be fine. You two aren’t getting rid of me that easily.”

Cullen looked to Solas, worry flitting through him for the other man. He sighed and cupped Evelyn’s chin, tilting her face up so he could kiss her sweetly. “We’d better not,” he murmured and hugged her tightly. “At least I can look after Solas while you’re away. Can’t have the both of you disappearing on me,” he said as he pulled back and looked down at her, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear.

A smile turned up the corners of her mouth just slightly and she nodded. “Do that. Please,” she said and wrapped her arms around his neck to kiss him again. “I’ll come back to you, I promise. I love you,” she whispered as she hugged him tightly. She turned and went to Solas, touching his hand to draw his eyes up to her. “And you. Stop. Whatever you’re working on, it’s not worth this. You have to take time to rest and eat or you’re going to fall over.”

It was worth it. Even if it killed him, it was worth it for the chance to save her. He let his hand curl around hers and he pulled her down to kiss her. “I will not stop,” he said softly, feeling horrible that he was not going with her. But he could see the determination in her eyes and knew it was pointless to argue. “Be safe, ma vhenan,” he murmured and released her hand. He gave an apologetic look to Cullen, wishing he could go with her, but Solas knew that the Commander had other duties to attend to here and couldn’t shirk his work. He got to his feet, at least determined to see her out the gates. “I do not need looking after, lethallin. I just need some rest and I will be fine.”

Cullen chuckled and walked over to them, resting a hand on the back of the man’s neck. “I seem to remember the two of you looking after me when I was at my worst with the lyrium addiction. Let me return the favor. A hot meal, a bath and some sleep would do you good, Solas. Might clear your mind, help you think on this with better clarity.” He rubbed at the tense muscles he could feel there. Whatever it was that he was working on, it was eating him.

He managed a nod, then took Evie’s good hand to walk down the stairs with her, reaching back to take Cullen’s hand with his other. He worried about this, about her going out and using the mark. Would that only exacerbate the situation? His hands curled protectively over theirs, as if he could somehow keep them safe by just keeping them at his sides. The same guilt, same worries, kept playing over and over in his mind. He was going to lose it if he didn’t figure something out soon. 

Evie was just as worried as they were, but she didn’t want to show it. She’d spent too long sitting in her room, worrying over her own fate. She desperately needed something to do. She gave her companions a big, toothy grin when they reached the stables. “Ready to go?” she asked Dorian, Cassandra, and Varric.

Dorian smiled at her. “Ready as we will ever be, I suppose.” He looked between Cullen and Solas, the dear Commander looking as upset as Solas. His eyes focused on Evie, so it had something to do with the Inquisitor? Questions burned in his mind, but he decided to keep his mouth shut, at least until later. “Don’t worry boys, we shall keep her safe from harm.”

“As much as we can, she bribed us with quite a bit of ale to go out on this venture so soon after getting back from the Arbor Wilds,” Varric said, “I was still taking off my armor from the trip when she came and asked us to go with her.” He winked at the Inquisitor. If it hadn’t been important, she wouldn’t have asked them. 

“Well I didn’t want you to go to all the trouble of getting undressed just to turn around and put it right back on,” she teased back, the heavy feeling in her chest lightening a bit. This felt good, to joke and tease with her friends, people who didn’t realize that her own hand was trying to kill her. “Let’s get going. I feel like killing some demons,” she said and turned to Solas, pressing a kiss to his lips. “Take care of yourself while I’m gone,” she murmured, then turned to Cullen and kissed him as well.

Cassandra’s eyes widened a bit and she turned away, clearing her throat. She knew the three of them were involved, but seeing it that blatantly made her… wonder… about things. She had the sudden urge to lose herself in one of Varric’s romance novels and she toyed with the idea of asking him to write something like this. No, she wouldn’t give him that satisfaction. But still… She hurried over to grab the reins of her horse, trying to resist the urge to watch the three of them together.

Cullen would have thought such an action would have left him embarrassed beyond recovery, but as it was, only a faint blush spread across his cheeks and he smiled at the rest of them. “Have a safe journey. We’ll keep the fires hot. Return to us as soon as you are able,” he said, watching as they all mounted up and headed out. He watched until they were specks across the bridge before he turned to Solas, “Come on, let’s get you something to eat, love.”

* * *

Evelyn couldn’t believe how much better she felt after spending just a handful of hours out with her friends. It wasn’t that she wanted to be away from Cullen and Solas, not at all, but they were both as worried as she was. With Dorian, Cassandra, and Varric, she could at least ignore the problem for a bit. They weren’t worried. They didn’t keep looking at her as if they expected her to fall over dead at any moment. And it was refreshing. 

“There is a report of a rift not far from here,” Cassandra said as they dismounted their horses at the camp. She was glad to get off the horse; she much preferred walking instead. A smirk touched her lips. She knew how how much Varric enjoyed walking cross country. And anything that annoyed him amused her more than it should. 

Varric groaned, “You know dwarves are short distance walkers. Doesn’t take much for our legs to give out because they are so damn short. You know that Seeker. Besides, if we walk so much, I might be too tired to regale you with stories around the campfire. Need my strength for that.” He chuckled, his mind was already working on a new chapter of Swords and Shields. With Dorian and Bull, on top of the Inquisitor and her romantic interests, it was gold.

“You will find the energy. I am certain of it. You never tire of talking,” Cassandra answered, drawing her sword as they walked. She could already see the telltale glow in the sky ahead. She tried to fight the smile on her lips, but didn’t quite succeed. He knew how much she liked his stories. The entire return trip from the Arbor Wilds, she’d listened to him talk, telling them stories which she couldn’t decide if they were entirely true or not. Didn’t matter really, they were still captivating.

“These two,” Evie muttered in an amused tone to Dorian. “I’m telling you, you were right when you suggested that they should be together.” She reached over her shoulder to pull her staff. She could see the demons now, lurking about beneath the rift. Her hand zinged pain up her arm and she grit her teeth. Damn it all. Still, the rift needed to be closed. She couldn’t turn back now, so she tried to put the pain out of her mind, hoping the fight would be a quick one. “Who knows? A little more pushing and you might convince them,” she said.

Dorian’s eyes had been drawn to the Inquisitor’s mark when she hissed through her teeth as it flared because of the rift. His eyes widened a bit to see it a bit more… excited than usual, bit of fade magic arching off of it in little dancing patterns. “Yes… well, you can lead the horse to water but you can’t make him drink. No matter how much he should.” He looked pointedly at the dwarf, pulling his own staff free. “There’s already so much tension between the two of you. A little romp in the sheets would do you both some good. Then you could write a story about it and sell it, make a fortune.”

“And here I thought you believed my romance novels were nug fodder. I had no idea you were a fan as well, Sparkler. Don’t worry, I’m working on yours. Got it all planned out and everything. The Magister and the Qunari. It’s going to be the best romance this side of the Frostbacks.”

Cassandra whirled on her heel. “Do not provoke me when my sword is drawn,” she warned, narrowing her eyes at Dorian. She’d had enough of the teasing about her and Varric. A romance between her and Varric was probably the least likely thing to happen, and considering everything they’d dealt with, that was saying something. She drew a sharp breath through her nose and turned back around, charging forward to attack the demons. She needed to hit something.

Evie would’ve laughed if her hand hadn’t been bothering her so much. She would have to drink more of the potion Solas had made for her when they got back to camp. She spun her staff, aiming spells at the demons, freezing one in its tracks, which Cassandra promptly shattered. The mark on her hand flared, making her drop her staff, and she quickly fumbled to recover it. “Damn it,” she snarled and focused again, aiming another spell.

Varric spotted the uncharacteristic fumble Evie made and laid out extra cover fire for her to recover her staff. “You okay there, Inquisitor?” he shouted over the sounds of battle. He was promptly reminded of when he’d first met the woman after the destruction of the Conclave. Her mark had been acting similarly then. Well, shit. If it was getting worse, that might explain the rather impromptu trip to the Hinterlands to close what rifts they could, but shit. She shouldn’t have to do this if it was killing her. 

“I’m fine!” she grit out in answer to the dwarf’s question. Damn it. She didn’t want them worrying over her too. She concentrated harder, taking out her pain and frustration on the demons, using it to fuel her attacks. When the last demon fell to Cassandra’s blade, Evie ran forward and thrust her hand up at the rift. Oh Maker, it felt like her hand was on fire. She grit her teeth, sweat trickling down from her temples, forcing her arm to stretch out until she felt the magic snap, and the rift closed. “Fuck,” she gasped, unable to hold it in anymore as she pulled her arm back. A sick feeling pooled in her stomach when she saw her hand. Not only were the veins in her hand glowing, but now that glow was starting to creep up the veins in her wrist as well. 

“What’s wrong?” Cassandra asked, hurrying over to the Inquisitor. She’d never seen the other woman appear to be in pain like that after sealing a rift. “Maker,” she gasped when she saw Evelyn’s hand. It looked horrible. “What is happening to your mark? Is it spreading again?” 

Dorian walked over, panting from the fight and when he saw Evelyn’s hand, he realized why Cullen and Solas had looked the way they did. “That’s… not good,” he muttered and studied the mark. “Maker’s breath, Evie, why didn’t you say something? Closing all of these rifts cannot be good for you! There has to be another way to close them without you injuring yourself further.” He really thought it looked like some sort of sickness, a fade illness… or something. 

“I… I thought that maybe if I used it, it might, I don’t know, pull some of the magic out, make it less,” she muttered. It sounded stupid to her when she said it aloud. “I’ll be fine. Solas is working on a way to stop it. He… he tried to, like he did when I first came out of the Fade, but it didn’t work this time. He thinks there’s other ways to stop it. Beating Corypheus and recovering the orb, for one. But until then, and in case that doesn’t happen, he’s trying to find another way.” She winced and stood up straighter, looking back towards their camp. The sun was setting, it had taken a while just to reach the camp. “I have a potion in my bag that makes it hurt less. Let’s head back.”

Varric exchanged a look with the others and fell in step with the Inquisitor. “Sparkler’s right, Inquisitor. There’s duty and then there’s looking out for yourself. You’ve worked your ass off for this Inquisition. If closing the rifts now is what’s hurting it, you need to stop. We have the most brilliant minds at Skyhold and the ones we don’t we’re just a letter away. Maybe you should save your hand for Corypheus, when he shows his face again.”

“Damn it,” she huffed, feeling defeated. “I can’t just sit around and wait for someone to fix this for me. I wanted to do…  _ something.  _ I thought this might fix it.” She pressed her lips to a hard line as they walked back, feeling angry with herself for not being able to handle it on her own. “Solas is working himself to death trying to find the answer. And Cullen is so worried, it’s like he’s afraid to let me out of his sight. I don’t like stressing them out like this. They deserve better. And I can’t just leave all these rifts open. The demons aren’t going to stop. They’re going to keep coming through and hurting people and I’m the only one who can stop them. I can’t just go back and sit around, waiting for Corypheus to show up.”

“And no one is saying that you have to do that,” Dorian insisted, “It was a sound idea, truly. Just don’t get lost in the idea that you are in on this alone. People will always come up with new and exciting ways to close rifts and defeat demons. It’s in our natures. What cannot be replaced is you. A great many people care for you.” He shook his head. “Solas told me the mark was flaring up, but he didn’t mention it being this bad. Might I have a look at it when we get back to camp?”   

“Couldn’t hurt,” she answered with a shrug. “Solas wasn’t lying to you. I asked him and Cullen to keep it quiet. I didn’t want anyone worrying over me. So, you know, don’t be upset with him for making it sound less than it was.” She felt the need to defend him, even though Dorian didn’t sound angry with Solas. He was only doing as she’d asked. As soon as they got back to the camp, she went and retrieved her bag from her horse and pulled out one of the little potion bottles Solas had made. She gulped it down, squeezing her eyes shut as she waited for the pain to ease. “Oh thank the Maker,” she whispered after a few moments. The pain wasn’t entirely gone, but it was much more bearable. 

“There must be something more we can do,” Cassandra said, watching as Evie took a moment just to breathe. It frightened her to think that Solas was unable to stop the mark from spreading again. He’d managed it before, what had changed now? She looked to Dorian. “Perhaps there is something you can do. You can help Solas figure out how to make it stop, can’t you?” she asked hopefully.

“That is my sincere hope, Cassandra,” he said honestly as he sat down next to the fire that was already roaring away in the pit as he stretched out his legs. “I’m not certain if necromancy can help, but we will see what I can do. If not, then two heads are certainly better than one in this case. Between the two of us, we should find something to help our dear Evelyn.”

Evie went to sit next to Dorian and held out her hand for him to examine. She wanted to lie, to tell him that it wasn’t as bad as it looked. But she couldn’t bring herself to say it because she knew they wouldn’t believe her anyway. She remembered Cullen’s suggestion about removing it. She really didn’t like that idea, but it was better than dying. “Do you… if the mark was removed, do you think we could still defeat Corypheus?” she asked. 

Dorian looked up at her as he cradled her hand in his own, studying the marks. To remove it... He looked back down at her arm. They would have to amputate at the elbow. It was still a better option than letting it progress. The question circled around in his head. Could they defeat Corypheus without the mark? “With the breach in the sky closed, I don’t see why we couldn’t. Morrigan was going on about us killing his archdemon. We kill that, he won’t be able to jump into another corrupted body and he’s mortal once more. So, yes. If you want to take that route, I believe we will be more than able to defeat the Magister.”  

Evie’s bottom lip trembled. “I really don’t want to lose my arm,” she said softly. She tried to imagine what it would be like, to be an amputee, and she didn’t like the idea at all. She didn’t want to feel helpless, to feel like she was somehow less. She swallowed harshly. “Stupid mark,” she muttered angrily, though she knew it sounded childish to pout. “Maybe Solas will still find a way. If you can help him, I would be forever in your debt, Dorian.”

Dorian hugged her tightly. “Think nothing of it, my dear. What else are friends for?” He gave her a smile. “Seriously, I have no idea what friends are for. You’re the first I’ve had in a long while. The rare rose in my small garden.” He cupped her cheek, “Now, none of that, it’s not over until it’s over and even then, it’s questionable.” 

She managed a sad smile for him and leaned into him again, hugging him tightly. “I don’t know what I’d do without you,” she whispered. “I never dreamed I’d have people in my life who cared about me so much. Ever since I was sent to the Circle…” She trailed off and shook her head, burying her face into his shoulder. “I don’t want to leave any of you now that I’ve finally found you all.”

“Nor do we want you leaving us. I’m sure if you are worried about your arm, we could start the lose an arm for Evie religion. Can you imagine? So many people around will take off their arm for you. I imagine Orlais will turn it into some kind of fashion statement. And Maker knows what they will do with the extra body parts. Best not to think on it, my dear.” 

“Oh Maker,” Cassandra groaned as Evie gave a watery laugh. “The disgusting part is that I could see it actually happening.” She sat herself down at the campfire, watching the Inquisitor for a moment. Evie didn’t deserve this. She wished she knew some way to make the situation better, to help stop the mark from spreading. “We must face Corypheus again as soon as possible. It is the best option for saving your arm and your life. All our lives.”

Evie nodded as she pulled back from Dorian. “It’s just frustrating. Things have been going so well, especially with Cullen and Solas. I don’t want to lose this now that I have it.” She sat back with a sigh, trying to think of happy things instead of focusing on her hand. “I really couldn’t ask for better. I’m so happy with them. The both of them. It’s been amazing.” A soft smile spread across her lips as she thought about them. Not just the passionate nights together, but the companionship, the love between all three of them, the quiet moments spent just enjoying each other’s company.

Cassandra rested her chin in her hands as she leaned forward, listening to the Inquisitor. The romantic in her was showing again, and she couldn’t help it. Though she’d never known someone in such a situation, she was fascinated by it. She wished she could read their story. She sat back as a notion struck her, and she pursed her lips. “That sounds like it would make a wonderful romance novel,” she commented, looking innocently up at the sky.

Varric snorted, “Yeah, cause that’s really subtle, Seeker. I’ll have to sit down with you all later and go over the details so I don’t get anything wrong. You know, sweeping motions made by the men, the dinner dates, late night rendezvous. And love or passion, you think? Cause Tiny gave me hell over that one. Makes for one hell of a story.” He grinned over at Cassandra, “Want to proofread that one for me? I’m sure Sparkler won’t mind.” 

“Varric!”

Evie burst out laughing at Dorian’s outburst, and Cassandra looked like a child being given a surprise treat. “Love and passion,” Evie finally answered, wiping a tear of mirth from her eye. “One without the other is wasted.” She couldn’t stop smiling as Dorian huffed next to her. Okay, so maybe trying to close the rifts wasn’t the best plan of attack. But she felt better than she had in days, and she decided that the trip was worth it afterall.


	27. Chapter 27

“Tell them, lethallin.”

“I cannot.”

“You must.”

Solas choked on a sob, kneeling before his friend as tears burned his eyes. He’d been searching the Fade desperately for someone, anyone, who could help him. He never expected to find her. How was it that she came to him now when she had not before? It didn’t matter now. What mattered is that she was here, giving him the advice he needed to hear. He squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head as he leaned over his hands, his forehead nearly touching the ground. “I cannot. They will hate me if they know who I am. What I have done,” he said, his voice broken. “What will I do if I lose them?”

“Then they do not love you as much as they claim,” she answered simply. Mythal crouched down and touched his chin, raising his face to hers. It had been far too long since she had set eyes on him, enjoyed his company. “Lethallin… Solas… Living this lie has become too burdensome on you. It is easy to see how much you love them. That is why it bothers you so to keep such things from them. If they truly love you in return, they will find it in their hearts to forgive you.”

“But it is all my fault. Evie… the mark on her hand… it is killing her. How will she ever forgive me for such a thing? And Cullen. He loves her just as fiercely as I do. If my actions take her away from him, he will hate me as well.” He pressed his lips thin, his chin trembling, and he leaned into her, taking comfort from her embrace. There were so many questions, he didn’t know where to begin. “Where have you been all this time? Why haven’t you come to me before?”

“That is a conversation for another time,” she answered softly. It pained her to see him like this. She knew why he’d done what he did. A smile spread across her lips. “You deserve to be happy.” The smile faded to a frown as he shook his head and opened his mouth to protest. “You did not know what would happen. What happened to the world, to the people, was not intentional. And you may yet save it. But I will not see you lose yourself in the process, denying yourself any shred of happiness. How can they truly love you if they do not know you?”

He didn’t have an answer for that. Was it possible for them to forgive him? He didn’t know, but it was driving him mad. He was going to have to face his fears. And if they hated him, if they could not forgive him, then perhaps Mythal was right. “I am so afraid,” he whispered, tears leaking from his eyes. “I don’t want to lose them.”

“Have more faith in them than that,” she said. She pulled back to look into his blue eyes that brimmed with more tears. “Give them a chance to prove to you how much they love you. Love, true love, is unconditional. Allow them the opportunity to show it to you.”

He drew a long, shaky inhale and nodded. He had to do it. He could no longer live with this secret. “Will I see you again?” he asked, his heart breaking in an entirely new way at the thought of being without his friend again.

“Sooner than you think,” she promised and place a firm kiss to his forehead before she faded away.

Solas bolted upright in bed, shaking and covered in sweat. He looked to his side and saw Cullen still sleeping soundly. A frown pulled at his lips. Was it right to tell Cullen this while Evie was out on a mission? Perhaps it would be better, to tell them each individually, to allow them each some time to take in the information. He wiped the tears from his eyes, realizing he’d been crying in his sleep as well as in the Fade. He had to do it now, before he lost his nerve. “Cullen,” he said firmly and reached over to shake the Commander’s shoulder. Oh, he was going to be sick, he was so afraid. “Cullen, wake up. I need to talk with you.”

Cullen started awake, still not at ease with his own dreams that he could wake so peacefully. Especially not during war, not when their love was out there without them. He sat up suddenly, blinking into the darkness. The coals in the fireplace had died down. “Solas?” he muttered sleepily, rubbing at his face, “What’s wrong? What’s happened? Is Evie alright? Are you?” He gave the elf a once over; he looked more pale than usual, but otherwise seemed fine. He looked positively worried, however. He reached out, cupping the back of the man’s head. “What is it, love?”

“Evelyn is fine, as far as I know. But I… I need to tell you something. Something I have kept a secret for a very long time,” he said softly. He closed his eyes, savoring the feel of Cullen’s hand on him. He didn’t know if he would ever feel that again after this. The very thought made a knot form in his throat and made his eyes sting with fresh tears. He took a moment to calm himself before he looked at Cullen again. “I fear you may hate me once you hear what I have to say. Just… please hear me out,” he said. He hated the way his voice sounded. And he knew now that there was no turning back. 

The longer Solas talked, the more alarmed Cullen became. A secret? A secret that now had the normally calm and collected elf practically crying, shaking here on the bed. “I love you, Solas. Whatever it is you’ve done, there’s no way I could hate you for it.” He cupped the man’s face, scooting in the bed to face the man directly, brushing away the tears with his thumb. “But if you insist, I swear to you that I will hear you out first.” He wondered what secret he could be keeping that Solas would even think that. His mind tried to sort through the scenarios, but he couldn’t think of one thing that the man might have done.

Solas licked his lips as he sat up straighter, cross legged on the bed. He sat quietly, trying to think of how to begin. He wished he’d taken a moment to collect his thoughts before he’d woke Cullen, but he was afraid he would lose his nerve. “You should know first that I had no knowledge of what my actions would cause,” he said, his voice steadier than he expected it to be. “You remember the other night when Evelyn’s mark began to bother her, when I told her that the orb that bestowed that mark upon her hand was of elvhen origin? I never explained how I knew that to be true. I know, because it is my orb. I gave it to Corypheus.”

Cullen blinked at Solas, not entirely certain that he was understanding what the elf was saying to him. His hand pulled away from him as his mind focused on the words ‘I gave it to Corypheus.’ “Your orb?” He remembered that blasted orb, the one that Corypheus had used to destroy the Conclave, killing hundreds of people. “You gave that thing to Corypheus?!” He suddenly felt an itch to get up and walk, his fists clenching and he pushed himself from the bed, standing up before he started to pace, his mind going a mile a minute. He had to breathe. “Maker, Solas, that was yours? Where did you find it? Why did you even think giving that orb to Corypheus would end in anything but disaster?” He ran a hand through his hair and he felt an anger welling up inside of him. He looked to the elf, another remark hot on his tongue, when he saw the look on his face. The broken look, complete and utter shame, despair. 

Solas had expected this. And though it hurt, part of him almost relished in it, knowing he deserved this and more. “I did not find it. It has always been mine, the source of my power.” He turned more on the bed to face the other man, but did not stand for fear that his knees would not support him in that moment. “Do you remember what Abelas said at the temple of Mythal? That she was murdered and that the Dread Wolf had tricked the other gods, sealing them away? I am Fen’Harel. I am the Dread Wolf. The elvhen gods killed Mythal, my friend, and I sought revenge.” He bowed his head, his shoulders slumping a bit more. “I used my orb to create the Veil, sealing the gods away. And then I entered uthenera, sleeping for centuries. When I awoke, I was too weak to unlock my orb. So I gave it to Corypheus, thinking he would unlock it for me and that he would be destroyed in the process. Unfortunately he had other plans.”

Cullen listened, his mind drowning in the tide of information and he felt his knees give out and he sank to the floor. “You… you are Fen’Harel? But that would make you… slept for centuries.” His eyes widened and he looked at the man with a renewed understanding. Solas was an ancient elf. He swallowed hard, shock preventing him from forming many other thoughts. He licked his lips. “But… why would you need your orb unlocked? Why take the risk of giving it to someone else? A Magister?” It dawned on him then. “The elves… you… you are trying to help them?”

In spite of himself, the corner of Solas’s mouth twitched in a smile. He respected and admired Cullen’s intelligence. He raised his eyes enough to look at the man sitting on the floor, looking utterly bewildered. “You have to understand. When I awoke, this world was so different from the way it used to be. The elves, my people, had forgotten themselves. They lost their immortality. They lost  _ everything  _ because of my actions. I intended to set the world right, to tear down the Veil with my orb.” He pressed his lips thin again, his heart aching at the admission. “This world is so changed because of the Veil. It has blocked most people’s conscious connection to the Fade. It is like walking through a world of tranquil.”

He tried to visualize what it was Solas was talking about. He remembered the tranquil from Kirkwall, how they seemed to be shells of their former selves. Devoid of magic, emotion, anything at all. He looked back to Solas, trying to sort out the facts. His heart ached for the man, but it also was furious that Solas had been keeping such an enormous secret from them all. The voice at the back of his mind scolded himself, if he had been in Solas’s position, he would have kept it quiet as well. He swallowed harshly. Solas had been there with them from the beginning, trying to make up for what he had done. Helping to right another wrong he had caused. 

And he had been doing it alone. Carrying the burden of what he knew all by himself. “You gave Corypheus the orb with the intent that it would kill him. Maker, he just had to go and blow up the whole bloody conclave…” He pressed his lips thin. “If you hadn’t given it to him...if you hadn’t tried to do so much on your own…” He breathed out heavily, his heart hurting. He couldn’t stand it any more and he pushed himself up, going back to the bed and he sat down next to the elf.

That simple gesture meant more to Solas than Cullen probably realized. He was still shaky, his heart still aching with guilt, but at least Cullen hadn’t walked away. “I never meant for all of this to happen,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “It is my fault. It is all my fault. I should be the one paying the price for my mistake. But instead it is Evie. No one but me could have borne the magic that left that mark on her hand. She is dying because of my mistake.” He bowed his head again, squeezing his eyes shut against the tears that threatened to fall. “I am sorry. I am so sorry.”

Cullen felt his heart wrench at the admission and he looked to Solas, seeing the unshed tears in his eyes. He had his suspicions that Evie’s mark was more serious than Solas had been letting on, on account of the way the man had been working himself to death to try and help Evie. He wanted to be mad, he could feel it, but as he sat there, looking at the other man, he couldn’t find it in himself. What good would being angry at him accomplish? He knew he had done wrong and he had been paying for his mistake with Corypheus from the beginning. He intended to rid the world of an evil Magister while trying to save a race he doomed when he created the Veil. 

Maker… Solas created the Veil. It was almost too much to wrap his head around. How could someone so powerful ever come to care for some washed up Templar like himself? He was reminded of the fiasco with Bianca, how she had unintentionally given red lyrium to Corypheus. Her punishment was nonexistent and she hadn’t stuck around to lend her time and aide to those affected by it. His heart gave a lurch at the thought and he looked to Solas, tears in his own eyes. “You should have told us sooner.” He swallowed harshly and reached out, his hand skimming over the warm skin of the elf’s back. He gave a sob out at the realisation. He loved him. He couldn’t lose him and Evelyn. He would well and truly break.

Solas couldn’t believe his ears. He gave a slight jump at Cullen’s touch, his mind reeling. Could it really be that simple? He leaned towards the other man, slowly at first, and when he realized that Cullen wasn’t pulling away, he threw his arms around him. The tears escaped him then, finding himself in the strong embrace of Cullen. “Ir abelas, ma lath,” he murmured, though he knew the Commander spoke little, if any, elvish. It couldn’t be this easy, he didn’t deserve an ounce of forgiveness. He knew he should pull away, he didn’t want to, but he should, back and forth he argued with himself. He turned his face carefully, letting his lips barely graze Cullen’s stubbly cheek, not certain if that sort of affection would be welcomed in that moment. But he wanted it, wanted the reassurance, to know that Cullen could still care for him, even if he didn’t deserve it.

Cullen turned his head, his lips meeting the elf’s. He could taste the tears on them, he could feel the man shaking. Others would blame him, want his blood. There were too many people out there who would demand he pay so much more than he had already paid. He had given so much to make up for the mistakes he had made, it was a wonder there was anything left of him. He made his decision and wrapped his arms firmly around the other man, crushing their lips together as he poured everything into the kiss. “You didn’t mean for it to happen. You tried to make up for it… it’s more than anyone else has done. Maker, Solas…” He gasped against his lips, pulling back to look him in his eyes, red and tear filled, “I forgive you.”

“No,” Solas whispered, shaking his head adamantly. “You shouldn’t.” For a moment, he thought he might faint, his disbelief so strong that Cullen could forgive him. Was this man’s love for him truly that strong? He searched Cullen’s eyes, trying to understand that kind of compassion, to understand how someone could love so unconditionally. “I wasn’t asking for forgiveness, lethallin. I do not deserve your forgiveness,” he murmured. “Or your love. And you freely give both.” He pressed his lips thin, shaking his head again. He didn’t know what to think. If the positions had been reversed, he would not forgive so easily. “You are a better man than I.”

“I don’t give it to just anyone. I’ve done things I’m not proud of either. Things I had to do because there was little or no alternative. You didn’t ask for forgiveness, but you need it. You’ve carried this burden far too long and all alone. That’s more than enough punishment, don’t you think?” He cupped the man’s face, studying him carefully and he knew that he had made the right choice. “I don’t know what I would do if I lost you. Being with you and Evelyn, I want to be selfish. I don’t want to be alone any more. I need you. I will help you do what you need to, to make this right. You are Evelyn’s best chance for survival.”

“Do you do that on purpose?” Solas asked with a breathless, watery laugh. “You always manage to speak how I am feeling.” He drew a shaky breath, trying to calm himself. “I don’t want to be alone, either. I meant it when I said I could not see my future without you and Evie.” He closed his hand around Cullen’s wrist, leaning his face into his palm. “I did not want to keep this secret from you, or from her. I was terrified that I would lose you both. That you would hate me. I did not think my heart could bear it. But the guilt… it’s been eating me alive for so long, lethallin. So long.” 

Cullen leaned forward, resting his forehead against Solas’s. It was almost as if he could feel the utter agony that the other man had been living in. It was a weight that could crush someone who was of lesser strength of mind. “You don’t have to bear that alone any longer,” he murmured, looking up at him, brushing his cheek softly. He leaned back, studying the other man as his mind sorted through the information. “Maker’s breath, it makes so much sense now. I’m not certain, ah… that is...” He trailed off and rubbed at the back of his neck with his free hand as he managed a small smile, “I’ve never really met anyone quite like you before.” He moved then to sit against the headboard, pulling Solas next to him. The warmth of the other man, the rightness that settled in his heart. Solas wasn’t the monster here. It was Corypheus. “You are still you.” 

Solas gave a nod as they settled themselves on the bed. “I am,” he said, drinking in the warm comfort of Cullen at his side. He had not expected this at all. He wished he could thank Mythal for her wisdom yet again. There was still guilt, still worry there, but there was also a huge sense of relief. At least now he had one person he could share with, who he didn’t have to be so guarded with. “I am no different now than I was before this conversation began. Just now you know the truth.” He turned and looked Cullen in the eye. “The whole truth. Of what I am. Of what I have done. I swear to you, no more secrets. No more lies.”

“That means more to me  than you think,” Cullen said as he leaned his head against Solas’s, “I can’t even imagine carrying that around. I know why you did it, I understand. I think, if you had told us sooner… I don’t think I would be as understanding,” he sighed out, wrapping his arms around the other man. He never knew he could care for someone this much. For two someones. The things he would do for Evelyn and Solas. He licked his lips, looking towards the fire. “Is it still your plan? To take down the Veil once you retrieve your orb? What… what will happen to the world once you do?” His own mind thought to the demons that haunted him, would that become a reality?

“It is,” Solas answered. “Unless I stumble upon a better option.” He sighed and sat up a little straighter. “When I created the Veil, I took everything from the elves. I cannot stand to see my people suffer as they do. It isn’t right. And though it was not intentional, it is still my fault.” He paused as he thought about what would happen once the Veil was torn down. “There will be no more separation between this world and the Fade. There will be chaos, at least at first. But eventually it will settle and the world will be as it should have been all along. I wish there was a better option.”

Cullen swallowed thickly as he listened. It didn’t sound good. It sounded like a lot of people would die in the chaos. “There must be a better way,” he said, looking to the elf, “Another way than to destroy the world again.” He threaded his fingers with Solas’s. “We will find it. I swear to you. You don’t need any more blood on your hands, I know we can find away to save the world.” There had to be a way without any more innocent bloodshed. 

“I hope you are right, lethallin. I truly hope you are right,” Solas sighed and leaned his head back, looking up at the canopy of Evie’s bed. He swallowed thickly. “Now I just have to work up the courage to have this conversation again with Evelyn.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “I hope she can be as forgiving as you are.” A mirthless chuckle escaped him. “I should have waited until she returned, then I could have told you both at once and been done with it. Patience was never my strong point.”

Cullen chuckled and turned his head, reaching up to brush his knuckles against Solas’s cheek. “You could have fooled me,” he murmured, leaning in and catching his lips in a gentle kiss, “You aren’t alone in this any more, love. We will tell her together.”


	28. Chapter 28

Evie was relieved to return to Skyhold. She’d gone through the potions Solas had made for her faster than she thought she would have. The glow from the mark had traveled halfway up her forearm now, and the pain was almost constant. And though she tried not to, every time it flared, a cry of pain escaped her. Once or twice, it had even dropped her to her knees. The thought of removing her arm was almost a comfort now. She didn’t know how much longer she could endure it. 

When she tromped up the stairs to her room and found Cullen and Solas there, it was like she could feel the immediate comfort of their presence. Solas was on the couch, a book in his lap, and Cullen sat at her desk, going over reports. It made her happy to see them so comfortable in her quarters, even without her there, like they belonged in this space. “I’m back,” she announced, managing a smile for them as she slung the pack from her shoulders and set her staff aside. “We only managed to close two rifts, but at least that’s something.”

Cullen looked up at her voice, smiling at her as she came in. He stood up and walked around the desk to her. “It’s something. Two more that we do not have to worry about,” he said as he drew her into his arms, hugging her tightly before he kissed her soundly. He’d be lying if he wasn’t nervous about telling her the truth about Solas. Somehow, he had a hunch that she wouldn’t take the news as well as he had. He had told the elf this, and for better or worse, they were going to tell her. “How is your arm?”

“It’s… alright,” she lied, “It’s hurting a little more than it was before though.” She looked over at Solas, who had risen from the couch. “Would you happen to have any more of those potions? I went through them faster than I expected to.” She managed a smile as Solas nodded and went over to a little box he had sitting on the floor by the couch and retrieved a bottle for her. She all but snatched it out of his hand and drank it down in one gulp, squeezing her eyes shut as she waited for the pain to ease. It did, but only slightly. The potions weren’t working as well as they had before. She forced a smile on her face. “Better,” she said and went to sit on the edge of the bed to unlace her boots. “I hope you two behaved while I was away,” she teased. “Or if you didn’t, at least you’ll tell me all the juicy details.”

Solas didn’t miss the tone of her voice or the look in her eyes. To be honest, sex had been the furthest thing from his mind for days now. But oh, hearing that tone, knowing what he could lose now, it didn’t make this any easier. He managed a small smile for her. “We behaved ourselves,” he answered and went to sit on the bed next to her. He looked to Cullen, trying to draw strength from the other man. He licked his lips and looked to Evie again. “Vhenan, we need to talk.”

Evie froze, not liking the tone of his voice. She slowly sat up straight, looking between Solas and Cullen. The looks on their faces unsettled her. “What’s wrong?” she asked, trying to steel herself for whatever they were getting ready to say. With everything that was going on, she didn’t know if she could handle much more. 

Cullen licked his lips, worry creasing his brow. He didn’t want to spring this on her, Maker knew she had more than enough on her plate. “It wasn’t easy for me to hear either, love. Just hear him out,” he said, his voice almost a plea. His gut was twisting into knots and he didn’t like it. Maker, had this been what Solas had been feeling since everything began? “We love you. Remember that.”

“What is it?” she asked, her voice more demanding now. If anything, they were worrying her more, not comforting her. She looked to Solas, seeing the worry in his expression as well and it made her stomach hurt. “Just tell me. Whatever it is, we’ll get through it.” She reached to take Solas’s hand, feeling it tremble slightly.

“There’s something I should have told you a long time ago, vhenan,” Solas said, letting his hand curl around hers. Though he and Cullen had just had the same conversation, it didn’t make this any easier. “The orb Corypheus carries. It is mine. I used it to create the Veil, to seal the elven gods away when they murdered Mythal. I then slept in uthenera, and when I awoke, I found the whole world changed. I gave the orb to Corypheus for him to unlock it. I did not foresee him doing so at the Conclave.”

Evie’s eyes widened with every sentence and she yanked her hand back from his. “You… what?” she gasped, her mind reeling. The orb was his? He’d done this? He’d caused the Divine’s death, killed countless others, and… “This mark on my hand is your fault?!” She got to her feet, yanking off her gloves in the process, and pulled up her sleeve to show how far up her arm the mark had spread. “You did this to me! And you claim to love me?! You… you LIAR!”

Solas cringed as she shouted at him. But his eyes were drawn to her arm. It felt like he’d swallowed a block of ice. “Vhenan, please, listen to me,” he begged, a sharp pain starting to radiate through his chest. She was taking this worse than he’d anticipated and if he didn’t calm her down, things would only go downhill from here.

“Don’t call me that,” she spat at him, beginning to pace. “How could you keep this secret from me? After everything… The whole time…” She couldn’t even form a complete sentence, her mind was so full of questions and her heart full of hurt. She’d never felt so betrayed. This was all his fault. All the time they’d spent together and he’d never breathed a word of this. “And you!” she cried, rounding on Cullen. “You knew? You knew and you didn’t tell me?!”

Cullen winced as she rounded on him. “He only just told me while you were away.”  His eyes followed Evie’s arm and he knew it had to feel worse than what she was letting on. “He didn’t mean for any of these things to happen and he has been around since his mistake trying to make it right. He’s saved you the best he can, he’s doing all he can now to find a cure. He intended to kill a Magister and right the wrongs done to his people. He never meant to hurt you or anyone at the Conclave. Bianca handed Corypheus the red lyrium, yet she got away with barely a slap on the wrist.” He rubbed at his neck, trying to explain it to Evie. “But you have every right to be mad.”

“You’re damn right I have the right to be mad! And don’t bring Bianca and her bullshit into this. I’m pissed off enough as it is,” she snapped. She waved her hands in the air, then pinched the bridge of her nose. “Hold on. Why did you seal the gods away? Why would you care so much if Mythal was murdered?” she asked Solas, the fresh information still spinning around in her mind and it was all she could do to pick out bits and pieces of it at this point.

Solas sat as still as possible on the bed, fearful of angering her further. “You remember the statues at the temple of Mythal? The ones of the Dread Wolf?” he asked and waited for her to nod. “I am Fen’Harel. She was a dear friend to me, and they murdered her. In my grief and anger, I sealed them away as punishment. And in doing so, I destroyed the world of my time. I took everything from my people. When I awoke, I knew my only hope of setting things right was to use my orb to tear down the Veil. When I could not open it myself, I allowed my agents to lead Corypheus to it. I thought he would be killed in the process and I could reclaim the orb.”

Evie narrowed her eyes. “The orb you want to take back from Corypheus once I beat him,” she said, her voice dangerously quiet. “You don’t give a damn about me. You’re just using me. All you want is this fucking orb back so you can take the power in this mark and try to fix whatever it is you’ve fucked up.” Her lip trembled, a knot in her throat, and tears threatened to fall from her eyes. “I’m nothing but your puppet. And to think I was stupid enough to believe you cared for me…” She trailed off, shaking her head as tears started to stream from her eyes.

“No, vhenan, please,” Solas said, getting to his feet and reaching for her. “At first, yes, I thought the Inquisition the best hope of beating Corypheus. I did not care for this world or anyone in it. But then you showed me that I was wrong. I fell in love with you. And with Cullen. Please, vhenan, calm down. Let me explain.” He gently grasped her arms, his eyes pleading. He could feel tears in his own eyes, seeing her so upset and angry with him. It broke his heart to see her like this.

“I trusted you,” she sobbed, trying to pull back from him. “I trusted you!” she shouted and finally yanked her arms out of his grasp, then slapped him across the face. “GET OUT!”

Cullen flinched as Evelyn smacked Solas across the face and he moved to help the elf right himself. “Come on. She needs some time to think about this. You’ve come clean, that’s all anyone can ask.” He looked over at the Inquisitor, his heart aching at the look of pure hate that was on her face. “He didn’t have to help us. If he just wanted the orb, he could have gone after it on his own. He didn’t need us to get it back. Do you think he would have put himself through this if he didn’t love us? Why tell us the truth if he was only using us?”

Evie was in no mood for his logic. And part of it didn’t ring true with her anyway. “And what would he have done with that orb if I wasn’t around?” she shot back. “He stayed because he needs this!” She thrust her hand out to emphasize her words, the mark flaring angrily, and pain so intense shot up her arm that she cried out in pain, her knees buckling beneath her. 

“Evie,” Solas gasped and took a step towards her, his brow creased in concern to see her in so much pain. Pain he had caused. He felt his heart breaking even more; this was exactly what he had feared. She hated him. He could see it in her eyes, hear it in her voice. She was not going to forgive him for this.

The pain only seemed to fuel her anger and her heartbreak. “He doesn’t love us, Cullen,” she snarled, looking up at the two men, cradling her arm to herself. “He never did. I don’t know why he decided to tell us now and I don’t care. And if you believe his bullshit lies, then you can get out too.” She was angry with herself for believing Solas, for trusting him. And she was mad at Cullen for taking Solas’s side. Before this all began, she’d had no one. Maybe she was better off that way. “I’m done,” she hissed, getting to her feet, though she wavered slightly. “I don’t need you. I don’t need anyone.”

“Evie,” Cullen started but pressed his lips closed for a moment, “You still have us. If you want us, you know where to find us.” He clenched his hands into fists, feeling his heart breaking at the way she began to close in on herself. He wanted to comfort her, to hold her and tell her that everything would be alright. “We’ve all been alone for so long, we shouldn’t have to suffer it any longer.” 

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Well I hope the two of you are very happy together,” she spat and turned away from them. She couldn’t stand to look at either of them any more. “Get out.”

Solas took Cullen’s hand, his own shaking terribly, and tugged at him to come with him. It was over. There was no point in continuing the argument now. Only more hurt could come from it. There was a lump in his throat that he couldn’t swallow, and though he tried to hold them back, tears slipped from his eyes every time he blinked. With every step down the stairs, he silently prayed to hear her voice calling them back, to tell them she’d changed her mind, but he heard nothing and it made his heart sink even more. 

He led Cullen across the Great Hall to the Rotunda, but did not stop. He could only think of the Commander’s office, that perhaps there they might have a moment of privacy to deal with what had just happened. “It is my fault,” he said, his voice heavy with grief as they reached the battlements, the cold air wrapping around him as they walked. “All of it.”

Cullen quickly led them to his office, holding the door open for Solas before he locked it behind him, going around and locking the doors. He wasn’t in the mood to suffer anyone. “Hush, love. She was hurt more than most on that day at the Conclave. With her arm getting worse, I can’t blame her for thinking that. It went through my head, but it just didn’t make sense. I know you are telling the truth. I don’t know how, but I’m certain of it.” He ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. He wasn’t sure what to do. What did someone do when their heart had been ripped apart? “Come on, I’ll get us a fire started and send for some dinner.” 

The last thing Solas wanted was food. He fell back against the door with a sob and sank to the floor, drawing his knees up to fold his arms over them. He had ruined everything. He buried his face in his arms, giving in to the tears. “I knew she would hate me when she learned the truth,” he gasped out, his shoulders shaking. “The one good thing I had in my life I have now destroyed.” He was sick with himself, angry for letting himself fall in love in the first place. He knew when he first took interest in Evie, even before Cullen was part of the picture, that it would ultimately end in heartache. And yet he selfishly pursued it anyway. “I deserve this,” he whispered, gritting his teeth against another sob. He ran a hand down his face as he looked up at Cullen. “And you do not. I have ruined it for all of us.”

Cullen went over to him, kneeling in front of the elf as he grasped both of his wrists. “Stop that. You don’t deserve this. You don’t. You have paid for what you’ve done, you shouldn’t have to suffer any more. You need to have at least one person on your side. Evelyn will come around. You just have to prove to her that you are not staying because of the orb.”

Disbelief coursed through Solas. “You’re even more of a hopeless romantic than Cassandra,” he gasped, nearly laughing at the notion. But his lip trembled the next moment and he shook his head. “There may still be a chance for you. It is not your mistake that is killing her. You should go to her, later, when she’s had a chance to calm down. The two of you still have a chance to be happy. I should not have gotten involved. That was a poor decision on my part. I am not destined to be happy. I knew from the start that this would not end well, and yet I allowed us to travel this path anyway.” He bowed his head again, more tears slipping from his eyes. “Forgive me, Cullen. This was all a mistake.”

“Solas,” Cullen insisted, “Stop. I wouldn’t be happy if you were not part of the relationship. I need you as much as I need her. I can’t be whole without the two of you.” He rubbed his thumbs over the palm of his hands. He leaned forward and brushed a kiss over his brow. “You deserve to be happy. Life just hasn’t been fair to you,” he murmured against him, “Let me help you.”

Solas felt so torn. He wanted to hope, to believe that somehow it could all be salvaged. But in his heart, he felt that it was truly over. Could he really walk away though? He didn’t know. He didn’t know what to do, what to think. He leaned forward suddenly and captured Cullen’s lips in a desperate kiss, pulling the other man closer to him. He wanted them both. He loved them both. But perhaps this was fate’s way of showing him that it wasn’t meant to be. Just as suddenly as he’d initiated the kiss, he pulled back. “I am sorry, ma lath,” he murmured. He leaned back against the door and pushed himself up to stand, his hand fumbling for the door to unlock it. “I… need some time…”

Cullen nodded. “Just don’t sell yourself short Solas. You know where I’ll be if you need me or anything at all.” He licked his lips, they were still tingling from the brief kiss. “And don’t leave without saying goodbye.”


	29. Chapter 29

Evelyn leaned over the war table, determined to concentrate on the task at hand. She hadn’t slept at all the night before. Not after what Solas had told her. How could she? The betrayal of it all hurt too much. She didn’t know which pain was worse, the pain in her hand or the pain in her heart. But she found the pain in her hand easier to deal with, as if the physical pain was somehow an outlet for the emotional. And so she hadn’t taken any more of the potions that Solas had made for her.

The tension in the war room was palpable. Cullen didn’t look like he’d slept well either, if at all. And she now refused to look at him. It took everything she had not to break down and cry again. Losing both him and Solas at the same time was more than her heart could bear. Yet she couldn’t understand how he could be okay with what Solas had revealed. It was the elf’s fault that all of this had happened. How could Cullen accept that? It was like the knife of betrayal in her back was just being twisted. 

She clenched her fist as the mark flared slightly. Leliana and Morrigan were discussing something, something about Corypheus’s dragon. She could barely pay attention. Even though she wore thick leather gloves, the magic in the mark permeated through them, her palm glowing brightly. She licked her lips and then bit them, breathing steadily through her nose. Oh yes, Solas was so sorry for doing this to her, wasn’t he? That bastard.

Cullen felt terrible. He didn’t sleep at all after Solas had left him the night before. He was worried sick over the two mages he had let into his heart. He had spent the better part of the night praying to Andraste for guidance, and the rest of it he had thrown himself into his work. At least Leliana would be happy for that. Now, being in the war council with Evie pointedly not looking at him, it only drove the point home further that he was utterly alone in that moment. He could see the pain she was in and he wanted nothing more to take it away from her, but he was helpless to do so.

The pain was growing, intensifying, making Evie’s hand burn. She shook her arm, trying to make it stop, but it didn’t help. She could feel the eyes of her advisors on her. Josephine was saying something about contacting Orzammar, trying to find Corypheus… Evie couldn’t concentrate on it. She grit her teeth, her brow creasing as the searing pain seemed to pulse. “Maker damn it all!” she hissed, then cried out the next moment as the mark flared and from outside, a pale green light erupted in the sky.

Morrigan raised her eyebrows. “It seems Corypheus is not content to wait,” she stated, her voice calm and level. Why the Inquisitor had tried to hide the fact that her mark was bothering her, Morrigan didn’t know. It was more than obvious to everyone in that room. “You must close the breach now, before it swallows the world, and while you still have the chance.”

Josephine felt a panic rise up in her. Corypheus was attacking now? Most of their forces were still on their way back from the Arbor Wilds. Sending the Inquisitor out to face him with barely any support seemed like a suicide mission. “But that’s madness. Wouldn’t it kill him as well?” she asked, concern growing on her face as the Inquisitor leaned harder on the war table, nearly whimpering in pain. It was all madness.

_ ‘No, no, no, no,’  _ Cullen chanted in his head as he saw the breach wide open in the sky. With Evelyn’s mark the way it was, it shook him to no end to even think of what closing it would do to the Inquisitor’s hand and he looked over to her. His mouth was dry, he didn’t want to send her to her death. “In-Inquisitor, we have no forces that we can send with you. Most of our troops are still in the Arbor Wilds, clearing up the mess that is there.” 

“I have to go now,” she grit out and pushed herself away from the table. “He’s in the Valley of Sacred Ashes. I don’t have a choice. I’ll stop him this time, or die trying. It’s time to end this.” The thought of it was almost a relief. If she managed to stop him, then perhaps Solas could take back the damn orb and remove the mark from her hand. And if she was killed, well, at least she wouldn’t be in pain anymore. She finally looked up at Cullen for the first time since she’d entered the war room, feeling as though she ought to say something to him, but no words came to mind. She was too angry, too hurt, and so she turned on her heel to head towards the door, trying to decide who she should take with her to fight Corypheus.

“Evie!” The cry was torn from his lips as he watched her go, so furious still. She may be going to her death and she was content to just… leave it at that? The thought hurt him, but he knew she more than had her reasons. He circled the war table, going to her side as he looked her over. He could feel the tears gathering but he swallowed harshly. “We haven’t given up on you, love. Don’t forget that.” 

His words made her hurt more than the pain in her hand ever could. “Don’t,” she said softly, not looking at him for fear that she would give in just to try and ease the pain in her chest. “We don’t have time for this. Not now. You…” She paused and swallowed, blinking her eyes rapidly to stop the tears from forming there. “Doesn’t matter. Just let it go. Take care of yourself, Cullen,” she muttered. She wanted to cry again, she wanted to somehow undo all of this and just go back to the way they’d been before they knew that Solas had been keeping secrets. Damn it all. “Come on, Morrigan,” she called over her shoulder, her voice cracking as she spoke.

Cullen felt a lump in his throat grow as he watched her leave, and the look that Morrigan shot him, he wanted to just slap right off of her face. He closed his eyes and gave himself a shake. Now wasn’t the time to feel sorry for the entire situation. He needed to rouse what troops that they did have to send with the Inquisitor. If she was to have any chance at all, she needed what he could provide. “Dammit all, you there!” he called out to a courier standing by the door, “Listen carefully…” 

He gave the instructions for the troops, few that there were to head to the Valley of Sacred Ashes. Runners were already on their way to the other members of the inner circle. It was the best that they could do. Cullen hurried off to the Rotunda, searching for Solas.

“What is happening?” Solas asked, climbing down from the scaffolding. He hadn’t taken much time to paint lately and he thought that doing so might help clear his mind. It hadn’t, but it had been a nice attempt. He could see how tired the Commander looked, the concern all over his face. He could hear shouting, people running and clamboring about, and somehow he just knew. “It’s Corypheus, isn’t it?” he asked, brushing past Cullen to grab up his staff that leaned against the wall. From out in the Great Hall, he heard Evelyn’s voice, calling out to Varric to join her. So she was going to confront the Magister. He turned quickly around, meeting Cullen’s eyes, and he crossed the room to him again. “I will not let anything happen to her,” he vowed.

Cullen nodded, knowing that he spoke the truth. He reached out, cupping the back of the man’s head and leaning their foreheads together. “Not just her. Take care of yourself as well. I don’t know what I will do if I lose both of you out there today. Things are going to turn out alright…” Even to him, it sounded like a wish more than a true statement. “Just come back to us. That’s all that matters.”

Solas gave a nod, unable to speak in that moment. He didn’t know what was going to happen. He had to recover his orb, had to take back the magic that was trying to kill Evie. It was the best chance for saving her. Even if she didn’t forgive him, even if she never wanted to see him again, at least he could do this much. He pressed a fierce kiss to Cullen’s lips, his heart aching as he did so. He broke the kiss, his eyes closed as he rested his forehead against the other man’s, breathing deeply for a moment. “Goodbye, lethallin,” he whispered and quickly pulled away to head out to find the Inquisitor.

Evie was already at the stables by the time Solas caught up to her. “Inquisitor,” he called, his voice stronger than he thought himself capable of. His heart nearly stopped when she turned, her gaze icy and hateful. She’d already chosen her party, she had Varric, Cassandra, and Dorian with her. “Please…”

“Yes, you wouldn’t want to miss this, would you?” she spat as she pulled herself up on her horse. She pressed her lips to a thin line to keep them from trembling. “Well I suppose there’s no written rule that I can’t take four people with me. Hurry up if you’re coming. We don’t have much time,” she said, pointedly looking at the gate and not at him. Might as well let him come along. At least if he got his damn orb back, maybe he could take away the stupid mark and then he could go on about whatever business he had with the Veil and all that. But the thought of him leaving made a lump form in her throat, no matter how angry she was with him. Her heart broke at the realization; she still loved him.

Dorian exchanged a look with Varric as he watched Solas hurry into the stables to get his mount. The question of what had happened between Cullen, Solas, and Evie burned on his tongue, but he held his breath. Something had happened between the Commander and Solas while they had been away sealing rifts, that much was obvious. What wasn’t obvious was the reason why Evelyn would be so furious. He couldn’t think of anything that the two could have done to upset her so. Maybe it was the mark on her hand. “Evie, dear, I know it’s rather obvious, but are you alright? Do we need to maim someone for you?”

Evie scowled. “Two someones. But let’s focus on Corypheus for now,” she answered, then immediately wanted to kick herself. She didn’t want this, didn’t want to feel this way towards them. But she didn’t want to love them anymore either. Part of her wished she could just go numb, inside and out. She angrily brushed the tears from her eyes and looked to Dorian. “We’ll talk when we get back. When this is all over,” she said softly. At least she could count on him, could trust him not to betray her. Or so she hoped. This situation was making her start to question everyone. “Maybe it’s better to not trust anyone,” she muttered, more to herself than anyone else. “That way no one can hurt you.”

Dorian reached out over the distance between them, squeezing her shoulder. “No one but yourself, my dear. You are right, we will talk more when we return. Now, we had better finish off this Magister before he destroys the world as we know it,” he said, looking to Solas as he joined them on his own horse, “And we will be talking later, Solas.”

_ ‘No, we won’t,’  _ Solas thought to himself, thinking that this was absolutely none of Dorian’s business, but he gave the man a nod anyway. A new fear washed through him then, worrying about what may happen if Evie decided to tell everyone his secret. Perhaps it would be better if he did not return to Skyhold once this was all said and done. The thought broke his heart all over again, to think that he would not have the opportunity to try to do right by Evie, that he would leave her and Cullen. Well, Cullen had said not to leave without saying goodbye, and he had said it. Though it did not make it any easier.

In spite of herself, Evie felt a small smile pull at her lips as she urged her horse forward. At least Dorian was on her side, acting protective and looking out for her. Once through the gates, she let her horse break into a gallop, focusing her mind on the task at hand. Corypheus was not going to get away this time. Only one of them would still be standing by the end of the day. She was going to make certain of that.

* * *

With the lyrium dragon defeated, Evelyn and her companions chased Corypheus to the topmost part of the temple. Her arm screamed in pain being this close to the breach. Or was it this close to the orb? Either way, she didn’t know how much longer she could stay standing. She was desperate to end it. And if Corypheus was going to manage to kill her, at least she was going to take the bastard with her.

“Not like this! I have walked the halls of the Golden City, crossed the ages…” Corypheus bellowed, struggling to hold onto the orb, which glowed with a menacing red light. “Dumat! Ancient ones! I beseech you! If you exist - if you ever truly existed - aid me now!”

Evie didn’t know what she was doing when she held out her marked hand towards the orb. It was as if her arm moved of its own accord, and the orb flew out of Corypheus’s grasp and into her own. The light around it turned green again, the power surging stronger than she’d ever felt it before, and the Magister slumped to his knees, seemingly powerless. Without a second thought, she thrust the orb up towards the breach in the sky. She screamed in pain, and even to her the sound was bloodcurdling. She could taste blood in the back of her mouth. Surely her very bones were on fire. It couldn’t have lasted more than a minute, but it felt like ages before the surge of magic stopped and her arm fell, the orb dropping to the ground beside her foot.

“You wanted into the Fade?” she snarled, her pain the only thing driving her now as she stepped towards Corypheus, tearing away the bit of her glove that remained. She stretched her hand out towards his face. The green light engulfed the Magister, twisting him, making him implode in on himself until suddenly… he was gone. 

Solas could barely believe his eyes. She’d done it! She’d defeated Corypheus. “Evie,” he gasped, taking a step towards her. His eyes widened as huge chunks of the temple began to rain down upon them. “Watch out!” he warned and grabbed her good arm, yanking her to him, saving her from being crushed at the last instant. He could see how hurt she was from the mere look in her eyes, and he could see she was too exhausted to argue with him. “Hold on, vhenan!” he cried as the temple began to fall and he held her close to him, doing his best to shield her and keep her safe. 

“Maker’s breath,” Cassandra gasped, her knees shaking after the temple settled, dust and bits of debris still raining down on them. She looked around, making certain that Dorian and Varric were alive. They were, and were relatively unharmed, and she managed a small smile for them. Was it really over? It seemed that way. She looked to the Inquisitor again, and her smile turned into a slight frown as she watched Evie weakly push Solas away. “What has happened between them?” she asked quietly.

Varric shook his head, feeling his heart go out to the two of them. Evelyn had been hurt, by the orb, by Solas, Cullen. He wasn’t sure. “I don’t know, Seeker,” he admitted quietly, “It feels like there is an entire story here, bits and pieces leading to a bigger picture, but I have no idea what it is and it is driving me mad.” He shook his head. “Come on. Let’s go see if the others made it.”

Solas didn’t argue with Evie and quietly took a step back, giving her space. His eyes were drawn to the orb on the ground. “No,” he gasped and walked over to kneel on the stone, gingerly picking up the broken pieces.  _ ‘No. No! NO!’  _ his mind screamed. Without it, so many possibilities were lost to him. The chance to save Evie, the chance to remove the Veil and set the world right. “The orb,” he whispered, feeling tears in his eyes, though they were not for himself or the broken object he held in his hands.

Evie looked at him, the broken orb in his hands, and the broken sound of his voice. Even though she was angry with him, a small part, a very small part, felt sorry for him. She mentally shook herself, reminding herself that this was all his doing to begin with. “There’s no hope of repairing it?” she asked. She felt a knot form in her throat when he shook his head. Then there was no way to remove the mark from her hand. “Shit,” she hissed, looking away from him, tears brimming in her eyes. She could barely move her arm now. She needed to get back to Skyhold, and quickly. 

“Evelyn,” he called out to her, his voice a desperate sound, but he pressed his lips together when she continued to walk away from him. “Ir abelas, ma vhenan. Ar lath ma,” he murmured quietly, and turned his back on her as well. He needed to leave. There was nothing left for him here. He didn’t know where to go, what he would do next. He screwed up his face against the tears, and fell to his knees as a sob escaped him. Damn it all.

“It’s over,” Evie said as she tromped down the stairs to rejoin her companions. She’d expected to feel some sort of relief after she beat Corypheus, but there was nothing. Nothing but the fear of what would come next. “We need to get back to Skyhold,” she said, her voice flat and emotionless. Her arm still felt like it was on fire, she couldn’t stand it, and she threw down her staff so she could rip her coat away. “Oh Maker,” she gasped. Her entire forearm glowed green, the skin cracked and blistered, blood oozing from it, veins up to her shoulder now glowing as well. 

Dorian rushed over to Evelyn as he saw her arm. “Maker’s breath. Evie, I’m not certain how to say this, so I’m just going to be honest. That needs be removed.” He looked around the group. “Do we have time to get her back to Skyhold?” He winced and looked up and down her arm. “If we don’t do this soon, the shoulder will have to be taken away as well.” He pointed to just above her elbow, “Here.”

Cassandra blinked as she realized both Dorian and Varric were looking to her. “Don’t look at me!” she cried. “I am no surgeon!” She didn’t want to be responsible for that. “Surely we can make it back to Skyhold in time.” 

“Cass,” Evie gasped, shaking her head. She could feel it creeping up her arm now. “It’s still spreading. We won’t make it. Please…” She never thought she would ever be begging to have someone amputate her arm, but she’d truly reached her breaking point. “I can’t stand it anymore. It hurts…” She looked to Varric, and then to Dorian. “Please! One of you, help. Just take it off.” She was nearly in tears again, it was too much. “Take it off or kill me now!”

Varric nodded and reached into his pack, grabbing what health potions he had. “Might actually feel better than what pain she’s in now, Seeker.” He set the potions on the ground and went to Evelyn’s side. “Come on, sit down with us,” he murmured, guiding her down and angling her to lean against his back. He carefully grasped her marked arm and held it out to the side as he pulled his sash from his waist and tied it like a tourniquet above her elbow. “Look away, Inquisitor.” 

Dorian swallowed hard and knelt next to them, hugging Evie tightly, pressing her face to his shoulder. She was trembling so badly. “Cassandra, do it. Do it now!” he cried, reaching for a health potion and he uncorked it with his teeth, holding it ready to Evelyn’s lips. “You will drink as soon as it’s gone.” 

When Cassandra saw the Inquisitor nod, she set her jaw and drew her sword. She held it out, aiming carefully. She knew she only had one chance to really get this right. She hated that it had come to this. But this was better than Evelyn losing her life. She raised her sword high, drew a sharp breath through her nose, then brought the blade down swiftly with all the strength she possessed.

Evie screamed as the blade cut through her arm, one moment of blinding sharp pain and then… relief. She slumped against Dorian and gulped down the potion he tipped to her lips. She could feel something happening, a strange sensation of healing near her elbow, and her eyes fluttered. “Thank the Maker,” she gasped, feeling dizzy and exhausted, and she barely managed to mutter a word of thanks to her friends before her entire world went dark and silent.


	30. Chapter 30

Seeing Evelyn brought back, carried carefully in Iron Bull’s arms was enough to make Cullen’s heart wrench and put a halt to any celebrations that were going on. Seeing that her arm was gone made him feel a guilt he had never known before. He felt like there should have been something more that he could have done for her, something small he could have done but didn’t think of. Seeing that Solas was absent from the group as well made his heart break. He was alone again. When Evelyn woke up and saw him sitting at her bedside, he had no doubt that she would send him away, but she would know that he loved her enough to stay with her. He cried then. For the loss of not one, but two of the most important people to ever grace his life. 

Evie woke slowly, not realizing where she was at first. Had it all been a dream? Some horrible, gut-wrenching nightmare? Solas was Fen’Harel, Corypheus was defeated, and Cassandra had sliced off her arm. It had to be a nightmare. She moved her arm slightly and the horrible realization crashed through her. No, it was all real.

A groan escaped her as she turned her head, blinking at the man sitting on the floor next to her bed. He had his face buried in his hands and he seemed to be crying. That broke her heart all over again, to see him so upset. “Cullen,” she said softly and stretched out her hand towards him. She was sad enough for the both of them. She didn’t want to see him like this. She didn’t want him to hurt anymore. There was enough pain as it was. 

Cullen looked up, his eyes widening as he saw her awake and he stood up quickly. “Evelyn,” he breathed and started to lean in, but stopped himself, “I’m sorry. I know you don’t want to see me, but I wasn’t about to leave your side after I heard what happened.” He swallowed thickly. “Maker’s breath, I am so sorry for what you’ve been through… your arm...” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “And Solas didn’t return with you.” He pressed his lips thin.

“I know,” she whispered. She was still tired, and the remaining part of her arm still ached slightly, but it was a million times better than what it had been before. She didn’t want to be angry with Cullen anymore. She’d been so close to losing her life, and it made her realize that she didn’t want to die alone. She carefully reached out, her fingertips brushing his, and she looked up to search his bloodshot eyes. “I’m sorry,” she managed to say as tears brimmed in her eyes again. She was so damn tired of crying. 

Cullen gave a small cry of relief before he sat down at her side, grasping her hand in his as he leaned down to kiss her knuckles. “Don’t be. You have no reason to apologize. I should be sorry. I should have done something, I should have believed you when you said Solas was just here for the orb. Did he even try to save your arm?” He reached up and cupped her cheek. It was a relief to see her eyes, free from the agony that had been plaguing her for so long.

“No,” she answered, leaning into his touch. “The orb was broken. He tried to talk to me after, but I walked away. I didn’t want to hear it.” She pressed her lips to a hard line, shook her head, and looked up at the canopy. “It was so bad by that point, I don’t know if he even could have saved it. I’m glad you didn’t see it. Didn’t see me like that.” She swallowed and looked at Cullen again. “I’m sorry I was so angry with you,” she whispered, licking her lips nervously. “I know I was horrible. Do you think… Could you ever forgive me, love?”

Cullen cried, leaning his forehead down and against hers. “There’s nothing to forgive, my heart.” He pressed a kiss to her cheek, to her nose before he pulled back to look into her eyes. “I was so worried, without the both of you, I thought I would fall back into despair. The demons in my dreams might still come for me, but to know that I have you waiting for me when I wake…” He paused and licked his lips. “All I want is a future with you in it.”

That frightened her, to hear how close he had come to slipping. She reached up and cupped the back of his neck. “Don’t do that. You’ve come so far. I don’t want to see you go back to the lyrium,” she pleaded. “Don’t do that, Cullen. You’re stronger than that.” She pulled him closer again, pressing a kiss to his lips. A sob escaped her throat at the feel of his firm lips against her own. It was like a piece of her heart had been returned. Though only a piece of it. There was still something missing, something she knew would never be healed, and she tried to push Solas from her mind as she kissed Cullen fiercely.

Cullen gave a whimper as he kissed back at her, gathering her up in his arms as he drank deeply from her. Maker above, how he had missed this. Missed her. He felt a lump in his throat and tears gathered in his eyes as he kissed her over and over. “I’m so sorry. So sorry, love. I can’t lose you again. I don’t want to go through life alone. Do you think you could forgive me?”

“I don’t want to go through life without you,” she answered softly and wrapped her arms… arm around him. It felt off, but she told herself she would get used to it. “Let’s just move on from all of this. What we both said, did, we won’t hold it against each other. I can’t live with all this anger,” she admitted, pulling back from him and sitting up on her own. “I don’t want to go around so full of hate. I… I want things back to normal. As normal as they can be.” She threaded her fingers through his and tugged at him to sit closer to her. “Are you sure you still want to be with me? Now that you’ve seen what a bitch I can be,” she said, managing a small laugh that quickly faded. “Now that I’m…” She trailed off and looked to her arm, which was wrapped in a bandage.

“That you are more beautiful now that I can ever remember you being?” he finished for her, giving her a slight smile. “I’m certain we’ve seen each other at our worst. I am more than certain, you already have my heart.” He leaned back against the headboard, feeling still off. It was hard getting used to not having Solas with them and it left him aching in a way he didn’t like. “I think I’m ready to be finished with the Inquisition, with war. I want to be as far away from this as we can be. With maybe a dog.”

“A dog would be nice,” she said softly, a tiny laugh escaping her. She leaned her head on his shoulder, trying to take comfort in his presence. And it did comfort her, just… not enough. She chewed her lip as they sat quietly together for several minutes. She kept replaying it all in her mind, the night Solas had told her the truth, the way he’d looked when Corypheus had been defeated. He’d looked so broken. “That fucking asshole,” she finally blurted out, feeling like she was going to cry again. She drew her knees up and rested her forehead on them. “I still love him.”

Cullen leaned against her, kissing her bare shoulder. She still loved Solas. “As do I. It still feels as if I am missing a piece of myself. I’ve never felt this way about anyone, but you and him? You complete me so perfectly. I hope… if it’s just me, that I can make you happy. Treat you like the rare and wonderful person that you are.” He let his hand rub over her back soothingly. “Is there anything that I can do for you right now?”

“Make me stop caring about him?” she asked. She hated Solas, she felt completely and utterly betrayed by him, and she was still hopelessly in love with him. It didn’t make sense and it wasn’t fair at all. “How can a person love someone they hate?” she muttered and sat up straighter, wiping at her face with her hand. She looked to Cullen, feeling as though she’d hurt his feelings somehow. “Of course you’re enough for me. I didn’t mean it that way,” she murmured softly. “I just don’t understand how he could do this to us, make us both fall so in love with him, only to turn around and break our hearts. And idiots that we are, we still love him. That bastard.”

Cullen gave her a sad smile. “No and I honestly believe he didn’t mean to break our hearts. I think we both surprised him. Call me a fool if you like, but he is a man who has a lot on his shoulders. Perhaps he saw a kindred spirit in you and I. Maybe we were here for him, to give him a brief moment of respite. It hurts. Maker, does it hurt, but I wouldn’t trade our time together for anything. I will cherish it.”

“I just wish that things had been different,” she murmured and leaned against his side again. Maker, it felt good to have him there. “I just can’t wrap my mind around it all. He started all of this. He’s Fen’Harel, the Dread Wolf, an immortal. That just…” She trailed off, shaking her head. “Is he an elven god too? I don’t understand all of it that well. He would have to be, wouldn’t he?” She pursed her lips, her eyes going wide as the realization hit her. “We had sex with a god.”

Despite himself, Cullen laughed, “Well when you put it that way, I suppose we did.” It was odd to think of Solas like that, a bit unnerving. “Rather a bit unsettling to think that. I’m not sure which image is worse… or better, I suppose on your standpoint. That we had sex with an elvhen god, or that he had sex with us. With me, it might have actually been a step down, actually.”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Don’t talk about yourself that way,” she scolded. She heaved a sigh. “Doesn’t matter now. God or not, he’s a lying, self-serving asshole. It’s probably best that he didn’t return. I think Dorian was going to have words with him.” She moved to lay down in the bed, feeling emotionally and physically exhausted. “I just want to get past this somehow,” she whispered. “I’m so tired of hurting. I wish I could just somehow forget him.”

Cullen moved to lay down with her, drawing her into his arms. It felt so good to hold her again in his arms, he didn’t even mind that she was missing one. As if it made a difference. He knew she would be the same as always, ready to rise up against the new challenge. He kissed the top of her head. “As much as you might wish it, I’m not certain if it’s possible. Not for me. I don’t want to forget the good parts.”

“Then you’re a better person than I am,” she muttered as she nuzzled under his chin. She squeezed her eyes shut, hoping she could fall asleep quickly before the tears began again. She didn’t want to remember it. She didn’t want to think about how happy the three of them had been together. Because now she knew it was all lies. She scooted closer to him, drinking in the comfort he offered. “I’m sorry I’m so tired. I just… want to rest for a while,” she murmured. “Stay with me, love?”

Cullen smiled against her and nodded. His heart felt as if it would burst from the sheer happiness he felt. He was certain, as of that morning, that she had been lost to him. That she would never want to see him again. He knew she was upset about Solas. He didn’t want to think about it. He wanted to remember the good as much as he could, because if he focused on the bad, he would question himself and how he could fall in love with someone who was just lying to his face. “As if I would leave you now.”

* * *

When Evelyn awoke again, she wasn’t certain if it was sunset or dawn. There was only a faint light in her room, accompanied by a roaring fireplace. Had Cullen gotten up and made a fire? She snuggled into him for a moment, but froze, feeling as though they were being watched. She peered over his shoulder and her eyes went wide when she saw the man lounging on her couch, a book in one hand, and a glass of wine in the other. “Dorian!”

Dorian pulled his eyes away from the book he was reading, raising an eyebrow at the Inquisitor. “Ah, you are awake. Good. I was beginning to think neither of you would wake up. You’ve been sleeping all day, you know.” He snapped the book shut with practiced ease as he stood up and set it and the glass aside before he walked forward. “But imagine my surprise when I volunteered to be a bedside vigil, to come up here and find the very man you had been all too eager to push away, cuddled up with you in bed. Care to explain?” 

She sat up in the bed, looking down at Cullen as he still slept. She affectionately ran her fingers once through his hair. “He was fooled just like I was,” she answered softly. “He just wasn’t ready to give up yet.” She sighed again. She hated waking up. It was like reliving that moment over and over that it wasn’t a dream, this was reality, and it wasn’t going to go away. She looked up at Dorian, a sad frown on her lips. “It wasn’t his fault.”

“Fooled? By Solas?” He hummed. “So, you knew he would leave after the battle with Corypheus. No wonder you were so upset, my dear.” He pressed his lips thin and shook his head as he went over to the bed and sat down at her side. “Such a shame really. I don’t think I recall a time when you’ve been happier. Nor have I seen the elf look so… at peace. I thought you three were good for each other, you did seem to bring out the best in one another. To think he would have left something so amazing...”

“I thought we were too,” she answered quietly, her shoulders slumping. This pressing weight on her heart just wouldn’t seem to go away. She slowly shook her head, trying to fight the tears that welled up in her eyes again. “Solas is a liar,” she grit out through clenched teeth. “He lied to all of us. He was just using me all along, to further his own agenda. And when things didn’t go the way he planned, he left. He tried to tell me otherwise, but when he left, I knew I was right. It was never me and Cullen he was interested in.”

“My dear, people are many things. Each and everyone of us has our own agenda, we have secrets we don’t tell anyone about. Like my midnight tromps to the kitchens to steal cake and wine. Not the point.” He waved his hand in the air before he reached out and cupped her hand in both of his. “I may not have known him as well as you did, but I could see him, perched above as I was. After the three of you got together, he actually started humming.  _ Humming. _ I didn’t think he had such a whimsical bone in his body, but it was there. He may have had some different end goals. He did see the world in his own way, didn’t he? However, I very much doubt that he was not honest and truly interested in the fine Commander and yourself. What he did was stupid, leaving you. If I see him again, I shall do… something.”

In spite of herself, a small snicker escaped Evie. It made her feel a little better to know that Dorian was so protective of her, even if he had no idea what he was threatening and no plans to carry it out. She leaned her face into his hands, a pout on her lips. Did she tell him the truth? Her first instinct was no, not knowing what the repercussions would be. But then the hurt and anger welled up in her again. What loyalty did she owe to Solas now? To hell with it. Dorian didn’t understand why she was so hurt, so angry. Well, he was about to. “Dorian, Solas is a god.”

Dorian blinked at the Inquisitor, certain that he had heard wrong. He reached out and held a hand to her forehead. No fever. “Evelyn, don’t take this the wrong way, but I think you may have hit you head during the fight with Corypheus. I’m sure he has some skill, but I have to seriously doubt he was that good in bed.”

She pulled back from him, scowling slightly. “No, Dorian, I’m serious,” she said. “Solas is one of the elven gods. He finally came clean and told me and Cullen himself. Well, he didn’t claim to be a god, but he is immortal. The orb Corypheus had originally belonged to Solas. He gave it to that crazed Magister. He started this whole thing. He’s responsible for the conclave. It was his orb that put that mark on my hand.” She waved the stump of her arm as if to emphasize her point. “He’s Fen’Harel!”

Dorian studied her for a moment, his mind already digging up what information he had gathered on the ancient elvhen gods. He worked his jaw for a moment before he firmly stood up and walked back over to where he had set his glass and retrieved it, another glass, and the bottle he had been nursing, them brought them back over to the bed. “I think we both need wine for this. I’m not entirely certain I understand everything you just said. If Solas was really an ancient elvhen god… Maker, that would make him at least a thousand years old. Looks pretty good for his age, I must say. Good for him.” He poured Evie a glass and handed it to her. “Now, you’d better start from the beginning.”

By the time Evelyn finished recounting everything to the best of her ability, Cullen had rolled over twice, but not woken up, the bottle of wine had become three, and Dorian was fairly certain he’d lost track of time. “Absolutely fascinating,” he slurred, leaning against the side of the bed as he and Evie sat on the floor. “That bastard actually has more in common with me than he let on. Arse.” 

“See?” she said, reaching for bottle to attempt to pour herself another glass. She had to concentrate very hard to not spill the bottle, seeing as how she didn’t have a second hand to hold the glass. “Fuck this,” she muttered when the glass fell for a third time and she finally just swigged directly from the bottle. She was more than a little tipsy and though she knew she would pay for it in the morning, she really didn’t care. A hangover seemed like the least of her problems. “I hate him. I hate him and I hate that I still love the stupid bastard. I hate everything,” she ranted drunkenly.

Dorian groaned and took the bottle from her, taking a long pull for himself. He pulled it away with a smack of his lips and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, a grin growing across his face. “If you still feel feelings, you are doing this whole drinking thing wrong. Honestly, I have been slacking in my duties as a friend to you. I should have taught you this week one when we first met. That and how to master a hangover. I’ll show you that later on.” He nodded and passed her the bottle. “What, oh oops,” he muttered as he spilled some as he handed it off, “What if that silly apostate hobo loves you too?”

“He can’t, Dorian!” she practically wailed. “How could he love me if he could lie to me for so long? He just used me. And he used Cullen. Which somehow makes me even more angry,” she grumbled, her brow creasing as a protectiveness surged up in her. She looked over her shoulder at the Commander sleeping soundly on the bed. To be honest, she was amazed he hadn’t woken up. Without Solas, she expected him to have the nightmares again. “Fuck Solas,” she muttered with a gesture of her hand, slopping some of the wine out of the bottle. “Well, not really. Been there. Done that.” She took another long drink and let her head fall back against the bed. “Damn, he was good though. Exactly what you’d expect sex with a god to be like.”

Dorian snorted and then laughed as he leaned back, moving to lay down on his side, propping his head up with his hand. “Ah, my dear, that…” He stopped and blinked as for a moment he saw two of her. “That’s what I don’t understand. Not the sex bit, but I’ll ask about that later if I remember. But if he was just using you both, wouldn’t he want to keep up appearances for as long as he could? If he was just using you, why did he tell you the truth about himself?”

“Because he felt  _ guilty _ ,” she said matter-of-factly, blinking at him as she swayed slightly. “It was eating him alive because he knew that what he was doing was wrong! He didn’t care about us. But… Hold on, I had a thought there,” she muttered, pressing the heel of her hand to her forehead. Why would Solas tell the truth? “He wanted a clear con… clear conscien… He didn’t want to feel guilty anymore.” She gave a sharp nod, as if proud of herself, then slumped to lay on her side, just like Dorian. “That asshole.”

“Ahah!” Dorian exclaimed proudly, slapping a hand over his mouth and giggling the next moment as he realized that had been really loud. He grinned sillily the next moment as he looked at her. “See! That proves it and you just… just said. It. If he didn’t care, he wouldn’t feel guilty. If he didn’t really love you, he wouldn’t have cared that he was using you and he wouldn’t have told you the truth.” 

A serious pout crossed her lips. “Then what am I supposed to do?” she asked, stretching out to lay her head on the floor. “Just… be okay with it? With this?” She waved her amputated arm again. “I can’t trust him. I can’t forgive him. So does it matter if he loves us or not?” She couldn’t even begin to entertain the idea now. “I’m too drunk for this. And you. Quit giggling like that. You’re gonna make me laugh and I just want to be miserable right now.” She grabbed up one of the wink corks and flicked it at him, bouncing it off his nose. “You’re supposed to be telling me that he’s an asshole, not that he still loves me and Cullen.”

“Bah, as if I’ve ever done anything that was per the normal for society. You expect me to agree with you, but I, the evil Magister from Tevinter, deny you! Haha!” He laid down, unable to fight the spinning of the room any longer and tucked a hand behind his head. “C’mere. You… you’re warmer.” He held his arm out for her to snuggle up against his side. “But you are right on one account. He is an asshole.”

She gave a decisive nod. “He is,” she stated and moved to lay next to Dorian. How the floor could feel so comfortable, she didn’t know. And she didn’t much care to try to figure it out. “And you are an evil Magister. I will be sure to inform Varric so he can change the title of his book to The Evil Magister and the Qunari.” She smirked at the outraged look on his face. “Oh, don’t act like that. You love the idea of a book being written about you and you know it. Now shut up and go to sleep.”

“And here I thought you liked me,” Dorian murmured and hugged her close to his side, falling asleep quite easily.


	31. Chapter 31

Cullen had feared this could happen. Even now, while he shared a bed with one of his loves, safe and sound. It didn’t matter. He found himself kneeling on the ground, back in Kinloch hold. Magic pressing down on him like the heaviest weight he could imagine, crushing the air from his lungs while demons stood just outside of the barrier, taunting him. He wasn’t going to budge. Not one inch. He had promised Evie and he knew he was stronger than that. He swallowed hard, wishing he was in something more than his shirt and trousers. He wasn’t entirely certain if his templar armor would be a blessing or a curse though. “Leave me be,” he bit out through gritted teeth.

Solas promised himself he would stay away. He wasn’t wanted by Evie, and now that he had left after Corypheus’s defeat, he was certain Cullen wouldn’t want him either. And yet he couldn’t stay away. He lingered on the edge of Cullen’s dream, transformed into the huge white wolf. He paced back and forth, debating. He didn’t know if he could stand to watch it anymore. So many nights he had guarded Cullen while he slept, checking in on Evie as well. He hadn’t been able to find her in the Fade tonight and suspected she wasn’t sleeping. But Cullen…

No, he would not stand for this. With a vicious growl, he launched himself into the dream, shattering the prison that held the Commander. The pain of their separation fueled his attack as he tore through the demons. Though it did little to ease the pain in his heart, he reveled in the release of pent up energy and agony he felt. Never before had he so enjoyed the fight for the sake of fighting.

He turned to look at Cullen once they were gone, wondering if he should retreat, give him some space. He lowered himself to the ground, his ears pinned back out of wolfish habit, and whined as he looked up at his love.

At the sudden, blessed quiet that surrounded him, Cullen looked up, confused as to what happened and his eyes widened the next moment. Tears filled his eyes and he pushed himself to his feet shakily before he stumbled towards the wolf. “Solas!” he sobbed, wrapping his arms around the beast. “Thank the Maker. Love.” He threaded his fingers through the thick, white fur, pressing his face into the warmth as his tears fell into the coat. “I knew you didn’t leave us. I knew you cared. Somehow, I knew it.” There was a lump in his throat and he didn’t want to let go. “I miss you… I miss you so much. Come back. Please come back to us. We aren’t whole without you.”

Solas squeezed his eyes shut and laid his head over Cullen’s shoulder, pulling him into the best sort of a hug he could manage in that form. The words pierced his heart like a dagger. Oh, how he wished that he could. A whimper escaped him at the feel of Cullen’s arms around his neck. But he couldn’t go back to Skyhold. He had other matters that needed his attention. But he didn’t want to have to explain that to Cullen, didn’t want for Cullen to come looking for him. So he stayed as he was, giving him an excuse not to speak. He pulled back and met Cullen’s eyes with a sad look in his own, and slowly shook his head.

Cullen felt his world grind to a halt at such a look and he reached up, cupping the wolf’s head in his hands, searching through those impossible blue eyes. He felt the tears slip down his own cheeks as he shared a look with him. “Why? Why can’t you come back to us, love?” He leaned his head forward, meeting the wolf’s own. “Evie still loves you, you know? She thinks you betrayed us. Used us. That you don’t care. Show her. Show her you do care. That she and I were more than some silly dalliance.” He pulled back a moment later, searching the eyes once more. “I’m not giving up on you, damn it.”

If it was possible, Solas felt his heart break even more. Surely it was in shatters now. He bowed his head, a long whine like a cry escaping his throat. He hadn’t used them. It had never been like that for him. He had cared for Evelyn for a long time after getting to know her, and had come to care and love Cullen just as equally. How she could think that he had used them… He understood. It did appear that way, he could see it from her perspective. But that didn’t make it true and that didn’t make the accusation hurt any less. He hated seeing the tears on Cullen’s face and he leaned in to nuzzle at him, wiping them away.  _ ‘I am so sorry, lethallin,’  _ he thought, though he knew Cullen couldn’t hear or understand. He licked at the Commander’s face, wishing he had never caused him or Evie so much pain.

Cullen turned his face into the soft fur, holding on tightly. He knew his next question, but it caught in his throat several times as he tried to voice it. He was afraid of what the answer would be. “Will… will you come back? Ever? Just for us? We could come with you, wherever you are. You don’t have to be alone, not after so many years of solitude. I’ve gotten so used to both you and Evie in my life, at my side. Your wit, intelligence. Maker, I miss everything about you.”

_ ‘Damn it, Cullen.’  _ Solas didn’t know how to answer. He couldn’t stand seeing Cullen so heartbroken. But he had no intentions of returning to Skyhold. And he couldn’t ask them to come with him. But oh how he wanted to. Nothing would make him happier than to have the two of them at his side again. Though he doubted Evie would ever agree to it. He couldn’t bring himself to answer one way or the other. He would not lie, but he couldn’t bear to see Cullen even more broken. He stood and bit the hem of Cullen’s shirt, tugging the man to lay down. He curled around him, whimpering again, unable to stop himself.

Something about the sound from Solas made Cullen’s heart break and he knew the answer that wasn’t said. “It doesn’t matter. You’re here, that’s all the answer I need right now. You… you come back to us when you are ready. I don’t care if it takes days or years. You will always have a place here.” He turned towards Solas, letting the warmth of him envelope him. “Will you… at least visit me? At least here in the Fade? Please. Just keep visiting me. Us. That way I won’t have to worry more about you than I already am. Please.”

Without hesitation, Solas nodded and thumped his tail. He could do that. He’d been watching over them, whether they knew it or not. And he knew he couldn’t pull himself away from them that much. Even if Evie hated him, even if Cullen eventually grew to hate him, he would keep watching over them. He loved them too much to stay away forever. He nuzzled under Cullen’s chin, then laid his head in the Commander’s lap, curling his body tighter around his love. Oh, it felt so good to hold him again, if only here in the Fade, in this form. He’d longed for companionship for far too long. He didn’t want to be alone again.

Cullen gave a watery laugh, relief coursing through him at the enthusiastic yes. He rubbed at Solas’s head, hugging him tightly. “Good… that’s good. And I’ll keep your spot in the bed warm. Your book on the couch where you sit. Because I will never forget that you have a most important place in our lives. So you will never forget that you aren’t alone.”

It both warmed and broke Solas’s heart at the same time. Cullen was not making it easy for him to stay away. He squeezed his eyes shut again, resisting the urge to turn into his normal self so he could kiss him, hold him, tell him he loved him. There would be too many questions, the answers to which he himself hadn’t worked out yet. He whined and licked at Cullen’s hand gently, hoping the gesture was enough. But he knew it wasn’t. It would never be enough.


	32. Chapter 32

Evie stood next to Dorian, enjoying the rather warm day as they watched Cullen running new recruits through drills. The weeks had passed by slowly, and though she’d expected for the pain in her heart to lessen, it hadn’t. So instead, she coped by keeping herself busy, spending as much time with Cullen and her friends as she possibly could. Anything to keep her mind off of Solas and the gaping hole he’d left in their lives. 

“I think Cullen missed the reminder that the war’s over,” she joked, leaning close to Dorian and keeping her voice low as they watched the Commander. Though she suspected Cullen heard her; he looked over when she spoke and she flashed him a big, innocent smile. 

Dorian laughed as he saw the Commander giving them a look. “Eyes on your work, Cullen. We didn’t come here to stare at your pretty face.” He gave the man a raking look up and down, wagging his eyebrows at the other man, grinning as he saw the blush spread across those high cheekbones. 

Cullen gave a groan, rolling his eyes to the sky. “Andraste preserve me,” he murmured as he looked back to the training yard where the recruits sparred in front of him. It hadn’t been an easy couple of weeks. Evelyn was doing her best adjusting to life with one arm, Cullen did everything he could to help her, though she would get on him if he became too much like a mother hen. He had to remind himself that she wasn’t defenseless and she more than made up with her lack of arm with her magic. Still, their lives seemed a bit… out of sorts. They both missed Solas, even though Evie wouldn’t admit it. Still, he had seen the elf in his dreams, guarding him from demons at night. 

“We really came down here to stare at his ass,” Evie said to Dorian, giggling a little when she saw Cullen rub the back of his neck. It was all in good fun, and she and Dorian knew when to stop if they pushed Cullen too far. “I love it when he blushes like that.” She bit her lips together, trying to keep herself from laughing too hard. “Will you have time later to practice with me some more?” she asked, looking to the mage at her side. He’d been helping her practice her magic, learning to wield her staff one-handed. It was frustrating, but she was slowly getting there. She paused when a flash of white over Dorian’s shoulder drew her attention. “What is that?” she asked, squinting her eyes as the shape moved. “Dorian, Cullen, what is that?”

“What is wh-,” Cullen froze as he turned, looking off into the distance where he could see the white wolf pacing back and forth. It was some ways away and a quick look around the area told him that no one else had spotted it yet. “Maker’s breath, it’s him,” he muttered, blinking furiously before he rubbed at his eyes. Certainly he was seeing things. Perhaps he had been working too hard. He looked again and his heart nearly stopped when he saw that the wolf was still there. “It’s Solas.”

Dorian narrowed his eyes, following their gazes to see what they looked at. “That’s Solas? He never mentioned he was a shapeshifter. Are all gods shapeshifters?” he wondered and shook his head, he reached out his hand, placing it on Evie’s shoulder, “Want me to go give him a piece of my mind? I’ve been working on it.”

Evie watched in a state of disbelief as the wolf cautiously came closer, and she could see it more clearly. What was he doing here? After weeks of his absence, she didn’t know what to think or feel. She’d seen the wolf in her dreams, she and Cullen had talked about it, and Cullen had told her that it was Solas. She’d barely interacted with the wolf in her dreams, save for shouting at it to leave her alone, and once throwing rocks at it. “What is he doing here?” she hissed. She pressed her lips thin, thinking over Dorian’s offer. “You can have what’s left when I’m done with him.”

Solas wasn’t in a hurry to run up to Cullen and Evie. In fact, he’d argued with Mythal over it many times before he finally agreed to go back to Skyhold. It had taken him days to work up the nerve to approach the fortress. From their interactions in the Fade, he felt that Cullen would more than welcome him back. But Evie… Evie was another story altogether. His heart ached to see her now. In the Fade, she was whole, unmarked. But now he saw her arm removed and it upset him to know she had suffered so.

He was tempted to turn and run. But Mythal’s spirit willed him on, almost as if he weren’t in control of himself in that moment. He thought that perhaps approaching them in this form would draw less attention from the residents at Skyhold than if he’d shown up as himself. But he saw the way Dorian looked at him, and he wondered if it made a difference at all. He stopped a few yards away, ducking his head slightly and slowly wagging his tail. He didn’t want to appear aggressive, especially not with all of Cullen’s recruits so close by. That would be a scene. He nearly snorted at himself.

Cullen swallowed a moment before he turned back to the soldiers. “Alright, that’s enough for this afternoon. Go get something to eat and then start your rounds for the evening. We will meet back here tomorrow morning.” He watched as the recruits heaved a sigh of relief at his dismissal, waiting until they dispersed until he turned back to Solas. “Maker’s breath. You came back.” He stepped forward, kneeling down to wrap his arms tightly around the wolf’s neck. He wondered if the man was stuck like this and unable to change back to his regular form.

Solas leaned into Cullen’s embrace, relishing in it. It was nice in the Fade, but to physically be here now, well, nothing could compare to that. He looked over Cullen’s shoulder at Evie; she looked like she could spit nails. He nuzzled at Cullen’s ear, then pulled back and gestured with his head that they should move. He wanted to talk to them, and he didn’t want to do it out here in the open.

Evie pressed her lips to a thin line, half-tempted to kick Cullen for welcoming Solas back so easily. It made her heart race to be this close to Solas again, and not in a good way. Still, curiosity got the best of her. Where had he been? Why was he here? “Too afraid to show your true face around here?” she asked scathingly, and she nearly smiled when Solas pinned his ears back at her. She heaved a sigh. She’d seen the way he kept looking around, almost as if he expected someone to recognize him. “I suppose you want to go somewhere to talk.”

Dorian pressed his lips thin for a moment. “And Solas, I know you ducked out before I could talk with you some time ago. Don’t think you are going to get out of it this time.” He thumbed over his shoulder, looking at Evie, “Go on, take him to your quarters. I’ll deter anyone from coming up and visiting with you while you are with your… guest.” He raised an eyebrow at the wolf, the submissive pose that he presented. “I don’t think I have to warn you what I will do if you hurt either of them again, Solas.”

Solas bowed as well as he could, showing Dorian he understood. Not that he was afraid of the man. He knew now with Mythal’s power coursing through him that Dorian couldn’t touch him, even if his life depended on it. But it was better to not cause a stir. And he had no intentions of hurting Cullen or Evie ever again. Part of him appreciated Dorian’s words, knowing that he had become so protective over them.

“I’ll see you later,” Evie said, giving Dorian’s arm a squeeze before she followed after Solas as the wolf turned to head towards the Great Hall. She cast a skeptical look at Cullen as they walked. Had he really forgiven Solas, even after the two of them had agreed that Solas had used them to serve his own purposes? It was like the hole in her heart had been ripped open all over again. “This better be good, Solas,” she warned in a low voice.

Solas drew a long breath, reminding himself to keep his patience with her. He loved her, and he wasn’t going to give up so easily. As they walked up the stairs to the Great Hall, he found his path blocked by Cassandra, and he took a step back. Did the Seeker know of him as well? Did Varric? Or Bull? Or any of the others? He eyed her warily as he moved closer to Cullen’s side.

Cassandra blinked in surprise. “You got a dog?” she asked Cullen. She tipped her head as she looked at it. “Or is that a wolf?” She’d never seen such a beautiful animal, with its pristine white coat and steely blue eyes. “He’s beautiful,” she commented, cautiously stretching out her hand. “Is it tame?” When the wolf didn’t move, she gently ran her hand over the soft fur.

“Careful, Cassandra,” Evie warned, giving the wolf a scathing look. “It might take your arm off.”

Solas allowed Cassandra to pet him, although he felt rather foolish. He looked up at Cullen with pleading eyes as if to say,  _ ‘Please make this stop.’  _ And Evie’s words didn’t help matters. She was so angry with him, he wondered if this was a waste of his time. Would he be able to get through to her, to make her hear him out? No, he couldn’t give up. He had to try. An exasperated sort of sigh escaped him and he looked up at Cullen again as Cassandra continued to pet him.

Cullen couldn’t stop himself as he chuckled. “I think he likes you, Cassandra,” he teased with a wink to the wolf. “I’d let him stay, but I’m getting a headache and he’s been doing wonders for my sleep. Perhaps later you can visit with him some more?” he suggested as he reached down and scratched behind the wolf’s ears.

“Oh!” Cassandra said and stood up straighter. She knew how bad Cullen’s headaches could bother him. “Sorry to keep you,” she said, giving the wolf one more pat on the head, then she hurried down the steps and out of their way.

“Serves you right,” Evie said with a smirk, looking down her nose at Solas, who gave a huff. She continued on up the stairs, through the hall, and to the door that led to her room. She wasn’t entirely sure she wanted Solas in there. It would be too much like it had been before, and she was trying to move on from that. A lump formed in her throat as she thought about it. She didn’t want to move on, and yet she didn’t want to love him anymore either. 

Solas tipped his head at her, seeing the way her hand hesitated on the doorknob. He could see the conflict in her eyes, the pain in her expression. She still cared, at least he knew that much.  _ ‘Come on, Evie,’  _ he thought, as if he could urge her to give him just this one last chance to make things right. That’s all he wanted. Just one chance to make it better somehow. A sigh escaped him when she finally opened the door and he quickly trotted up the stairs. He closed his eyes as he entered her room, drinking in the familiar comfort of the place. He looked around, his heart aching when he saw his book on the table next to the couch, just where he’d left it. Just as Cullen said it would be. He waited for them both to reach the top of the stairs before he looked at them, bowed his head slightly, and transformed.

Cullen watched as a light formed around Solas as he changed back into the man they knew. Seeing him standing in front of them was so much better than he thought it would have been. There was a relief that crashed into him like nothing he could remember over the past few weeks without him, but he knew the true test had to come from Evie. She had yet to forgive him after he had left the two of them after Corypheus’s defeat. Studying him, there was something different about him. He stood straighter, a wolf pelt draped over one shoulder, but more than that, there was an air about him. “You’ve changed,” he said before he could stop himself.

Solas squared his shoulders, feeling more confident than he had the last time he’d faced the two of them. “I have,” he answered, clasping his hands behind his back. He reminded himself to be calm, to not just throw himself at them, though deep in his heart that’s all he really wanted to do. “And yet I am still me.” He knew that with Mythal’s energy that he would seem more intimidating, more powerful, and yet anyone who knew him before wouldn’t quite understand it. “I will explain it, if you’ll let me, lethallin.”

Evie didn’t know what to think. She was screaming on the inside, half of her wanting to throw herself into his arms, to feel that strong, safe comfort he always exuded. And the other half of her wanted to claw his eyes out for what he’d done. She pressed her lips to a thin line as she took a step back from him. 

It broke his heart to see the distrust in her eyes. It was going to take a lot to get her to even listen to him. He glanced at Cullen, wondering if perhaps she would listen to him if he tried to reason with her. He looked to her again. “Evelyn…”

Why did he have to say her name like that? She bit the inside of her cheek, trying to rein in all the questions and accusations that reeled through her mind. The most obvious one jumped out and she went with it. “Why are you here?” she demanded. “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t throw you from the balcony.”

“Because I still love you,” he answered sincerely, his expression softening. Couldn’t she see that? “I never stopped loving you. Either of you,” he said, looking at Cullen as well. “I would not have risked returning here if I didn’t. Surely both of you can see that.”

Cullen swallowed thickly, feeling the tears gathering in his eyes and he nodded. He looked at the floor for a moment, feeling Solas’s gaze on him and he glanced up. He gave the other man a smile, “I know you never left us. Not truly. You protected me in my dreams every night. You told us the truth when you didn’t have to. I know, but I can’t convince Evie for you.” 

“I do not expect you to,” he said gently. It killed him to not reach out and pull Cullen into an embrace, to smother his mouth with a kiss. It would have to wait. He looked to Evie again, trying to choose his words carefully, but she cut across him before he could open his mouth.

“If you loved us so much, why did it take you so long to tell us the truth? Why did you leave after the orb was broken if you truly cared about us?” she demanded, spouting off the questions as fast as they came into her mind. She could feel her throat going tight, she knew her voice was going to crack if she kept talking. And her eyes burned, threatening to let loose with tears again. She didn’t want to give him that satisfaction.

“Because this is what I feared,” Solas answered, relaxing his posture a bit. “I never intended to fall in love. Not with anyone. Certainly not two humans. But when I met you, got to know you, everything changed. You and Cullen have changed the way I see the world now. And by the time I realized that I cared so much for you, I was afraid you would hate me for keeping my secret. But the guilt… it ate at me. So much more than either of you can ever know. I am sorry I kept it from you for so long.” He drew a long breath through his nose, looking to Cullen again, drawing strength from his presence, even though he was being relatively quiet. Solas understood why; the poor man was standing there with both of his loves as they fought and argued. It wasn’t a fair position to put him in. “I left after the orb broke because I felt there was nothing left for me here. Since then, in the Fade, Cullen has convinced me otherwise. Even if he didn’t realize it at the time.”

Damn him. She could feel her anger lessening, a want to believe him growing in her chest. She shook her head adamantly. “No,” she said, the sound dangerously like a sob. “No, you left because you didn’t get what you wanted. You wanted your orb back and that was all that mattered to you. You didn’t care about me. You just wanted the anchor.” She waved her arm at him, trying to hold onto that anger she felt starting to slip away. “All of this was your doing! It was your fault! You did this to me!”

A few weeks ago, that would’ve crushed him to hear, knowing it was his fault. But his time spent with Mythal had changed many things. He had a clearer head about it all now. “I did not!” he shot back. He reached out and grabbed her shoulders, his eyes fierce as his gaze bore into hers. “It was my orb, yes. But it was Corypheus who killed the Divine, not me. It was his fault that you ended up with the mark. It was his fault you lost your arm.” He felt his lip tremble, but his voice remained strong and unwavering. “I am sorry for what happened to you, vhenan. But not all of the blame is mine.”

Evie felt she was slipping, falling, his words striking something in her like waking suddenly from a dream. She couldn’t argue with that logic, even if she wanted to. And she could see it in his eyes, an honesty there that she’d never felt so strongly before. The word  _ vhenan  _ echoed over and over in her head, her resolve waning even more. “Don’t call me that,” she said, her voice quieter than she meant for it to be, and the tears welled more in her eyes. His hands on her shoulders were so strong and she realized how much she’d missed his touch. She slapped at his chest. “Don’t call me that,” she repeated, knowing she was lost now. She didn’t want to hurt anymore. She missed him. She didn’t want to live with that gaping hole in her heart any longer. “Damn you!” she sobbed and fell forward into his chest, screwing up her face. “I want to hate you. Why won’t you let me hate you?”

A relief flooded through him and he exhaled heavily as he wrapped his arms around her. He buried his face into her soft hair, inhaling her scent, and he kissed the top of her head. He thought his heart might burst just from holding her. “Because I love you too much to give up on you.”

Cullen could feel his nose tickle as the tears of happiness welled up in his eyes as he watched the exchange. He could see Evelyn’s body shudder against Solas and no matter what kind of respite he had been to her in the past few weeks, it made all the difference that Solas had come back to them. He closed his eyes briefly, feeling his tears slip down his cheeks before he looked at them again. He walked forward, placing a hand over Solas’s on her back, leaning against them. 

Solas grabbed Cullen and pulled him into the embrace, tears forming in his own eyes. He barely dared to believe that he was really there with them. Both of them. He buried his face against them, holding them as tight as possible. “My loves,” he breathed, not wanting to let go. He slid his hand around to tip up Evelyn’s chin, a frown crossing his lips at the tears in her eyes. “Hate me all you want. I will never stop loving you.”

In spite of herself, Evie shook her head. “I can’t,” she breathed. “I tried and I can’t hate you.” Words seemed to fail her then, and she did the only thing she could think of. She crushed her lips to his. A whimper escaped her throat as she tipped her head slightly and deepened the kiss. It was like a soothing balm on her heart, the passion in his kiss chasing away the last doubts from her mind that he had never loved her. She kissed back at him, not knowing what would come next for them, and not caring. As long as they were together again, they could work through all the rest somehow.

Triumph roared in Solas’s chest as he kissed her, pulling her tight against him. He had her back. He had both of them back. He’d nearly lost them, lost the most wonderful thing he’d ever had in his life, and now he’d somehow got them back. He was nearly breathless as he pulled back, his lips throbbing from the intensity of the kiss. “Ar lath ma, ma vhenan,” he purred at her, then looked at Cullen. Oh, he’d been waiting for this for some time. He pulled the Commander closer and smothered his mouth in a searing kiss.

Cullen gave a muffled cry of surprise that quickly turned into a desperate moan as he kissed the other man. Maker, how he had missed this. He lifted his hand, cupping the other man’s head as they kissed, tongues fighting for dominance and oh how he tasted sweeter than he remembered. He pulled back slightly, gasping for air. “No force can stop us from being together. And no force will stop her if you ever do that to us again, love.”

“I’m sorry, lethallin,” Solas murmured, leaning his forehead against Cullen’s, still holding Evie tightly to his side. “I had to go. There were matters that demanded my attention. But nothing will ever take me away from you again. Not now, not ever.” He spent several more moments just holding them, almost afraid that they would somehow slip away if he let go. A chuckle escaped him as he looked to Evie, cupping her face and drawing his thumb across her cheek. “I do not doubt it. She can be vicious when she is angered.” The corner of his mouth twitched with amusement. “When she saw me as a wolf in the Fade, she threw rocks at me.”

Evie felt her face burn. “You deserved it,” she said defensively, though she realized now that was a rather childish thing to do. Still, she stood by her actions. “And if I ever find out that you’ve lied or kept secrets from us again, rocks will be the least of your problems.”

“You missed it last week. She threatened a recruit to remove his lower bits with a rusty sword. You should have seen the color of his face when he realized she wasn’t joking around.” Cullen smiled at Evelyn, feeling… whole again. He leaned forward and kissed her lips, sighing against her contentedly before he pulled back, looking between the two of them. “Let me get the fire started. I imagine we have a lot to talk about.”

Evie was uncertain how to feel or act. Could it be that easy to just slip back into the way it had been before? She wanted to, but didn’t know if she could. Part of her still hurt that he had kept secrets from them. And a million questions burned on her tongue. “So… should we call you Solas or Fen’Harel?” she asked.

Solas chuckled at the innocence of her question. “Solas,” he answered. “Fen’Harel came later. An insult I wore as a badge of pride. Would you prefer if I called you Evie or Inquisitor?” he asked, a smile growing on his lips as he saw the recognition spark in her eyes. He reached for her hand, pressing his lips to her fingers. “I will never lie to either of you again. Nor keep secrets.” He looked over at Cullen, watching as he built the fire up. “Anything you want to know, you have but to ask. I will not risk losing either of you because of my own fears. I cannot change what I did before, but I can promise complete honesty in our future.”

Cullen looked over from his place at the fire, turning and moving to sit on the furs in front of it. “I think I thought about this situation over a thousand times. What I would say, what I would ask when you came back. Now, I can hardly think of a damn one of them.” He chuckled softly to himself, “I suppose the question I would ask is where have you been for the past few weeks?”

Solas led Evie over to the fireplace, and sat down between her and Cullen. “I traveled to meet an old friend of mine. One I thought dead long ago. I returned to the temple of Mythal, to a hidden part of it untouched by Corypheus or the red Templars. And she was there. I spent a great deal of time in her presence, discussing all manner of things with her. She was always so wise,” he said, his voice soft with fondness. “We spoke a great deal about both of you. It was she who encouraged me to return.”

“You left her behind?” Evie asked softly, her brow creasing in concern. From what little she knew of his story, he and Mythal had obviously been incredibly close. They had to have been for him to destroy his entire world in his grief for her loss. A sudden chill ran through her as she thought about that. He’d destroyed his own world for the loss of a friend. What would he have done if he really had lost her and Cullen? 

“Not really, no,” Solas answered. “She is part of me now. Had I known that she still lived, in some capacity, when I awoke from uthenera, I would not have given my orb to Corypheus. I would have sought her out, taken her power for my own. Which she willingly gave, of course,” he added, not wanting them to think he had taken something not offered to him. A soft smile crossed his lips. He could feel Mythal’s presence and it comforted him. “She will always be with me now.”

Cullen reached out, resting a hand on Solas’s leg. He couldn’t imagine what it must have been like for Solas, to have been alone for so very long. To think his friend murdered and having to give up everything to save the world he knew, only to have it change before his eyes. “I’m glad she convinced you to come back. It sounds like you’ve done so much for so little reward.”

“More like all the wrong things for the right reasons,” Solas replied. He had missed this, the quiet comfort between the three of them. Now, he couldn’t believe he had almost walked away from it. There was still a slight awkwardness that he could feel, and he knew that he would have to prove himself to them. But he was more than willing to do it. He could see Evie about to burst, the next question on the tip of her tongue. “Yes, vhenan?”’ he asked, nearly chuckling at her.

“Are you really a god?” she asked eagerly. 

Solas threw his head back with a warm laugh at the wide-eyed expression on her face. “No, I am not,” he answered. “None of them ever were. But I am capable of performing stronger magic than any other mage alive today. And I am immortal.” He hoped it didn’t sound as if he were bragging. He was simply stating the truth. “But I am no god. I hope that does not disappoint either of you.”

Cullen chuckled. “You’ll hear no complaint from me. To be honest, thinking of you as anything more is rather intimidating, if you ask me.” He smiled at Solas, reaching over to brush his hand against his cheek. “Does it bother you? That we are mortals? Humans?” He blushed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Silly questions, I suppose.”

“It isn’t a silly question,” Solas answered soberly. He stared hard at the fireplace for a moment, a fresh pain filling his heart. He’d thought about this before, but hadn’t voiced it. “It bothers me a great deal,” he answered honestly. “Only because I know that one day I will be without either of you and there will be nothing that even I can do to prevent that.” His voice was soft and quiet as he spoke, still staring into the flames of the fireplace. He swallowed and forced a smile. “But I will enjoy every moment I have with the both of you for as long as I am blessed to have it. I will love you both enough to last a thousand lifetimes if you will let me.”

Cullen smiled warmly at that, feeling tears gathering in his eyes once more. Maker’s breath, he had been crying more than a Chantry Mother as of late. He shook his head, giving Evelyn a smile. “Now who’s more romantic than Cassandra?” he teased before he looked back to the elf, “I couldn’t imagine a more perfect life if I tried, Solas.”

“Nor I,” Evie added, moving closer to Solas. She could feel tears in her own eyes and she carefully laid her head on his shoulder. A sigh escaped her and her eyes closed as she finally felt it, that complete wholeness that the three of them could only find in each other, that warm safety that just seemed to exude from him. And though it had taken her a long time to get to this point, and the words were hard to say, it needed to be said. And she meant it when she said, “I forgive you.”

It was Solas’s turn to choke up and he wrapped his arms around her. “Thank you, ma vhenan,” he murmured. Oh it felt so good to hold her, to be there with both of them. He reached for Cullen as he laid back, pulling Evie down to lay at his side. He just wanted to hold them both, for them to all lay there together until the hurts were healed. 

Cullen turned his face into Solas’s chest, reaching over and rubbing Evie’s back, bumping his hand against Solas’s. “I’m not certain if I can imagine what it would be like to be immortal. To live without the threat of death from age looming over you? How do you know to make every moment count without that countdown?” He smiled sadly, “To live every day to its fullest, as if it were your last one on this earth. I wish you didn’t have to spend it alone. Even for a moment.”

“I know it because you have shown it to me,” Solas answered, curling his arms more protectively around them. “You both have changed the way I see this world.” He turned his face to kiss Cullen’s forehead, and he sighed. “I wish it as well, ma lath,” he admitted softly. “But let’s not focus on that now. We have inflicted too much sadness upon ourselves over the past weeks. I want to enjoy this time with you. Please, let us just cherish what time we have. Starting now.”

Cullen smiled at that and nodded, reluctantly pulling back from them. “Let me change out of my armor. It’s not exactly fitting for a relaxing time,” he murmured and stood up as he headed over to Evie’s wardrobe where he had moved some of his cloths. Shirts and trousers and the like. He wondered if it could be this simple. “What are your plans now, Solas?” he asked, looking over his shoulder, his heart warming at the sight of Evelyn’s blissful face as she curled up against the elf. The way he held her as though she were the most precious thing in the world to him. 

Solas thought about it for a minute, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips as he trailed his fingertips up and down Evie’s shoulder. “I have many plans,” he answered, looking over at Cullen and watching him change his clothes. “I still intend to help the elves, though I have decided to do so without tearing down the Veil. The two of you have shown me that there is something still worth saving in this world. I will do all that I can for the elves of this time.” He paused as he thought about the next part, simultaneously preparing himself to be amused and bracing himself for their reactions. “And I intend to take both of you away from here. You have done more than enough for the Inquisition, for Thedas altogether. You deserve a break.”

Cullen paused, tying the laces to his breeches as he looked over to Solas. He exchanged a look with Evie, and he raised an eyebrow at the elf. “Take us away?” He gave a small smile as he walked back over to the furs, sitting down next to him. “Sounds like you are rescuing us. I’ll admit, I had been thinking about going away. Now that the war is over. It wasn’t like we were going to let you get away from us this time.” He reached out and gave Solas’s knee a firm squeeze. “Where are you taking us?”

Solas felt Evie stiffen at his side and he gave her shoulder a squeeze. “Hear me out,” he said softly to her before she could protest. “It isn’t ready yet. There is a home being built for us in the Crossroads. Not in the Hinterlands, but through the eluvians. I believe it is the best place for the three of us. It is closely linked to the Fade, and it will give me quick and easy access to the eluvians so that I can do my work to help the elves of this world. And it will allow the two of you to come and go easily to keep in touch with whomever you like here.”

Evie chewed her lip. “It sounds perfect,” she said softly. They’d talked about this before, when the was with Corypheus was over that they would go somewhere just the three of them. But could she and Cullen really just abandon the Inquisition like that? She looked up at Cullen as he sat next to them. “Can we really just go? I want to go, but… Doesn’t the Inquisition still need us?”

Cullen reached out and rubbed at her back affectionately, tracing patterns through her shirt as he thought about it. To finally leave behind a life of command, of battles, nightmares. “We’d have time to close out our affairs here, appoint new leadership for the Inquisition, if not end it all together. I know others will be looking to move on with their lives as well. Dorian might not like this, but if we could visit him, perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad.”

“Cullen is right, vhenan,” Solas said. He knew it was her friends more than her duty that made her hesitant. He could understand why, she’d spent most of her life without anyone who truly cared for her. Now that she had friends, a family almost, it wasn’t easy to walk away from. “You will have plenty of time to make whatever arrangements you need. Or if you truly do not wish to go, you can stay here and Cullen and I will visit you…” He trailed off, an amused smirk on his lips, and he winked at Cullen.

“Oh ha ha, smart-ass,” she replied dryly, but smiled the next minute. “It sounds wonderful. We’ll go with you.” She nuzzled into him, heaving a contented sigh. “Let’s just hope Dorian doesn’t try to kill you for this.”

Cullen chuckled and laid back on the furs, moving a pillow behind his head as he watched the two of them. It had been a while since he had seen Evelyn so at peace. It had been a while since he had felt at ease as well. Something about Solas coming back to them had been like the medicine they needed to soothe their wounded souls. “Or my sister, but I imagine that no matter where you take us, she will be able to track me down. Just fair warning. She’s like a bloodhound, that one.”

Solas chuckled warmly at that. “I shall keep that in mind.” He reached over and threaded his fingers with Cullen’s, sighing out at the contact. Just as it was a comfort for them, it was for him as well. “Not even an overprotective sister or a best friend could deter me. You both deserve to be happy, to enjoy your lives now after giving so much of yourselves to this cause.” He pressed a kiss to Evie’s forehead, then turned and did the same to Cullen. “You’ve done your part. Now let me do mine by taking care of you.”


	33. Chapter 33

They laid there together on the furs in front of the fireplace for a long time, lost in their own little world as they discussed their future together. Evie kept wondering to herself if this was really happening, if it could really be so easy to just fall back into this relationship now that she knew what she did about Solas. Not what he had done, but who he was. He’d said that he wasn’t a god, but in her mind, he was still more than just a man. He was immortal, powerful, and something about that just… changed him in her eyes. But she still loved him the same, and she didn’t question that he loved her and Cullen. There was something still missing, however. Some part that hadn’t been set right yet, and she wanted to do something about that.

They fell into a comfortable silence for several minutes, and Evie decided now was as good a time as any. She rolled more to her side, a smile on her lips as she draped her leg over Solas’s. Her heart fluttered when he turned those blue eyes on her and smiled back. “I’m so glad you came back and made me see the truth,” she murmured and pressed her lips to his, slowly at first, relearning his kiss.

Solas sighed as he wrapped his arms around her, returning her kiss, letting her control it. When she deepened the kiss and rubbed her thigh between his legs, a low moan escaped him. Oh, did he dare to hope? His length began to harden against the front of his breeches and he shifted slightly beneath her as he let his hand travel down her back to give her rear a squeeze. She moaned against his lips and he took that as an encouragement and pressed himself up against her thigh.

This was what he needed, what they all needed, somehow mending the final hurts in their hearts. Without breaking the kiss from Evie, Solas reached out, groping for Cullen, and pulled him closer. He broke the kiss with Evie just enough to turn his face and capture Cullen’s lips in a needful kiss.

Cullen gave a surprised moan as he was pulled from a light doze into a heated kiss. Oh Maker, he had missed this. They had not been intimate since before Evie had left on her journey to the Hinterlands to seal what rifts she could. Every time he had thought about it, it just hadn’t felt right. But this? Oh Maker, this. There was a rightness about it and he lifted his hand to cup Solas’s cheek, the thought that he was kissing an ancient elvhen god sent a wave of pleasure through him that settled in his groin.

Evie watched them for only a moment before Solas pulled her into the kiss as well. Oh she loved that, sharing a kiss with the two of them at the same time. She ran her hand down Solas’s chest, letting it skim over the front of his pants, smirking as he drew a sharp breath through his nose. She cupped the hardness she felt there, and a heat settled low in her own belly.

Solas nearly whimpered at her touch, bucking his hips up against her hand. He kissed more passionately at the both of them, holding them tighter to him. This felt familiar and new at the same time. He let his hand drift down Cullen’s back, just as he had Evie, and kneaded the Commander’s backside with his long fingers. “I missed you,” he breathed against their lips, swallowing harshly as Evie began to unlace his breeches. He could feel Evie fumbling as she tried to do it one handed, and he finally broke the kiss, rolling to lay her between Cullen and himself. A frown slightly pulled at his lips as he realized some things would have to be done a little differently now. But that wasn’t about to deter him. “Allow me,” he breathed as his fingers slowly worked over the buttons on her shirt, revealing her creamy skin beneath inch by inch.

Cullen couldn’t stop the groan that escaped his lips when Solas’s hand left his backside. He was feeling rather selfish, but knew he wanted to have Evelyn taken care of first, for the two of them to give her so much pleasure that she would forget about everything else. He leaned back and pulled the wolf pelt Solas wore free from him and tossed it aside before his hand went down to aid Evie in removing Solas of his breeches. He took the liberty of tugging them down the mage’s legs, his breath catching as they both were revealed to him. 

Solas kicked free of his breeches, shivering slightly as he was freed from the restraining fabric. He pushed himself up slightly to help Evie the rest of the way out of her shirt, and he hovered over her, drinking in the sight of her. It saddened him to see her arm that way, but he couldn’t help thinking that she was just as beautiful as ever. A light pink blush spread across her pale skin as her nipples hardened in the cooler air. A smile spread across his lips. “You are just as beautiful as the day I met you,” he breathed and dipped his head to capture a pert nipple in his lips.

A sharp gasp escaped her as his mouth closed around the sensitive flesh. Jolts of pleasure shot through her breast at the feel of his warm lips on her, his tongue tracing the edge of her nipple. “Solas,” she whined, squirming slightly on the furs they lay on. “Oh Maker…” Another hiss slipped from her mouth as his teeth grazed over the tip, making the heat in her belly grow, her center starting to throb with need. 

A moan slipped through Cullen’s lips and he laid down on Evelyn’s other side, cupping her neglected breast for a moment before he lowered his mouth to her. He slipped his tongue around the hard nub, teasing her, then he bit lightly at the flesh before he gently suckled at her. He let his hand skim down her chest, over the flat plane of her stomach before he reached her breeches. He smiled against her as he slipped his hand beneath the fabric, tickling the curls at the apex of her thighs. Maker’s breath, he could feel the heat radiating off of her. He groaned as he slid a finger into the slick heat of her core, swirling it around.

“Cullen!” she cried, her back arching off the floor as his strong finger slid into her body. She dug her fingers into the furs beneath her, rocking her hips into his touch. It made her tremble as he swirled his finger around a sensitive spot deep inside her, his mouth hot on her nipple, the stubble of his chin scraping against her skin. “Yes,” she breathed, squeezing her eyes shut against the pleasure that assaulted her senses. She clenched down around his finger, moaning loudly, “Oh Maker, yes.”

Solas loved to hear her like that, something in his heart swelling to know that she trusted him enough again to let him and Cullen pleasure her so. But speaking of Cullen… the man was wearing far too many clothes. Solas reached across Evie to untie Cullen’s breeches, yanking them down on his hips. He sucked harder at Evie’s breast, laving his tongue over her, drinking in the sweet taste of her skin as his hand reached for Cullen, wrapping his long fingers around the Commander’s length.

Cullen whimpered against Evelyn as the cool air touched his bare skin and then let out a deep moan as Solas’s skilled fingers curled around him perfectly. He shuddered and thrust forward into that tight grip as he buried three fingers into Evie’s silken heat. He needed this, needed the connection between the two of them. It filled the empty space in his chest that he had been feeling as of late and he knew where he wanted to spend the rest of his life. 

Evie’s eyes went wide and her mouth opened soundlessly as Cullen stretched her body around his fingers. It completely stole her breath away and she was left reeling with pleasure. She writhed, her hips jerking sporadically as her eyes rolled in her head. “Fuck,” she whimpered, her hand grasping, finding Solas’s hard length. “Please…” she begged, “I want… I need… ngh… both of you.”

A shiver raced up Solas’s spine at her touch and her words. He slowly and deliberately thrust into her hand, drawing his own over Cullen’s length. “Patience, vhenan,” he purred, though his own was quickly slipping. He pulled back from her breast and looked at Cullen, leaning over to kiss the other man, moaning low in his throat. He wanted to enjoy this, to take his time with them, savoring every moment of it.

Cullen smiled against Solas’s lips and pulled his hand from Evelyn, his fingers coated with her essence and he leaned over to taste the decadent fluid. “Mmm, Evie, you are divine,” he murmured and he leaned over to untie her pants, moving down to slip them from her hips and over her legs, inch by inch. He paused several times to lean over and kiss at the creamy smooth skin that was revealed to the both of them. “Mmm, should make certain that you can’t walk later, love.”

She giggled at the way he phrased it, but the idea set her blood on fire. “Yessss,” she purred. She bit her lip, wondering if it was possible, if she could take both of them at once. If she could handle it, it would feel amazing. And she thought that they both might enjoy it too, sharing her body with nothing between the two of them. A blush spread across her face as she thought about it, how to ask them for what she wanted. “Can… can we try something new?” she asked. “I want both of you… inside me… h-here,” she said, releasing her grip on Solas and trailing her hand down her own body, sliding her fingers into her wet slit.

Solas’s eyes went wide and his mouth went dry at her suggestion. Could they? His cock throbbed at the idea and he looked to Cullen. He could imagine how incredible that would feel. “I like that suggestion very much, vhenan,” he answered breathlessly. He moved to lay on his back, tugging at her to lay over him. He could see the way she looked at him, the blush on her face, a timidness in her body language. An understanding smile pulled at his lips. “Don’t be so shy, vhenan,” he said soothingly, knowing that she was still uncertain how to act now that she knew what he was. “I am still me. Nothing about this has changed.” He pulled her closer and kissed her lips, moving her over his body. “And you never have to feel embarrassed to ask me or Cullen for what you want,” he added, a low moan escaping his throat as he eased her down onto his hard length.

“Oh sweet Maker,” Cullen breathed as he listened to Evelyn’s desire, watched as Solas’s length penetrated her so deeply, her body taking him to the hilt. His mouth went dry at the sight. He wasn’t certain that this could be done without hurting her, he never wanted her to hurt again, but perhaps this was like fire, burning away the old pain to give way to something new and exciting. “I’ll go slow, love,” he murmured as he leaned over her, kissing at the line of her back, biting gently at the sweat soaked skin. He looked down to where she was joined with Solas. It was going to be tight. He grasped his cock firmly as he scooted closer on his knees to them, pressing the head up against her entrance. The shock of pleasure surged through him as he felt Solas’s throbbing hot cock pressing against his own. 

A sharp cry escaped Evie as she felt Cullen pressing against her, stretching her body further than she thought possible. Oh Maker. She bit her lips and pressed her face to Solas’s chest, slowing her movements over him. “Yes, Cullen,” she breathed, trying to rock back to take him into her body. She whimpered as she felt him starting to ease into her. She’d never felt so full and it sent the most exquisite aches through her core, radiating through her whole body. “Please more,” she begged softly, biting her bottom lip so hard she tasted blood. “All of it. I want all of you.”

Solas was left panting as he laid there, holding Evie’s hips steady, feeling Cullen’s thick cock sliding into her against his own. It made her feel tighter around him, he could feel her shaking with pleasure. He forced his eyes open, meeting Cullen’s gaze over Evelyn’s shoulder. His cock twitched of its own accord, rubbing against the Commander’s, and he gave a choked cry. “So good, Cullen,” he breathed, watching the other man with an intense gaze. 

Cullen shuddered as he pressed in. Maker, it was so tight, so hot. He could feel everything, the stretch of Evie’s flesh around him, the throbbing of Solas’s length along side his own. It stole his breath away and he dropped his head to the middle of Evelyn’s back as he became fully seated inside of her. “I-I’m not certain I can move,” he managed to gasp out as he experimented thrusting in, shuddering as the slickness created the most delicious friction between all three of them.

Tears of pleasure burned the corners of Evie’s eyes as she felt Cullen rock into her, both of them held securely inside her body. She kissed and sucked at Solas’s chest, shifting her hips slightly to meet Cullen’s gentle thrusts. She heard Solas moan and felt his grip on her hips tighten, and she moved with his hands, letting him guide her movements. “That’s… that’s perfect,” she squeaked, feeling her face burn, and she buried it against Solas’s chest, panting hard as the three of them moved together, experimenting, learning this. 

“It is,” Solas agreed, his voice a soft whisper. He would’ve been amused that all three of them were so breathless had he not been so consumed by the pleasure. Her body was soft, tight, and wet, slicking his cock against Cullen’s, which was deliciously hard and hot against his own. It truly was perfection, all three of them joined together like this with absolutely nothing separating any of them. He kept one hand on Evie’s hip, guiding her as she moved, and the other went to Cullen’s rear, pulling the Commander tighter against himself and Evie. “More,” he breathed.

Cullen cried out, shivering with pleasure as he felt Solas’s hand on him, pulling him closer. He swallowed thickly and thrust faster, biting his lip so hard he tasted blood the next moment. His control was slipping quickly and he finally gave up on hoping to go slow. He had to have this, had to experience it to the fullest. He groaned as he pulled back, only the head of his cock rested in her before he pushed back in, his breath stolen from his lungs as he did. “Oh Maker, yes, that,” he moaned out, repeating the action again and again.

Solas hissed as he felt Cullen sliding against him, the thrusts stronger now, more deliberate, and it made his toes curl. He rocked his hips up, thinking that he would surely lose his mind to this level of pleasure. The slick sounds of their joining, the wanton moans from both Cullen and Evie would surely push him over that edge before he was ready. “Evie,” he gasped, his mouth dry, his body shaking. “You’re so tight, vhenan. So wet,” he moaned, then lifted his head up to kiss Cullen’s lips. “You feel so hard against me,” he breathed.

It was all Evie could do to keep her hips moving, taking both men to the hilt as she tried to return the pleasure they gave her. Surely it was impossible. This much pleasure should be a sin, and she wondered if they knew just how much they gave. She could feel them both moving inside her, one pulling back as the other slid in, keeping her full and stretched. She tried to clench her body around them, squeezing the two of their lengths together even more, and a guttural moan escaped from her. She was so lost in it all, she couldn’t even form a single word.

“I’m not going to last much longer,” Cullen gasped out, the unspoken way that they had found to move with each other so good, so hot. He reached down, grasping Solas’s waist as he continued to thrust inside of Evie and he wondered why they hadn’t tried this before. His mind was growing fuzzy from the sheer pleasure of it all, how intimate it was for them.

“Same here,” was all that Solas managed to gasp out as he thrust faster into Evie. He could feel his cock swelling, his balls tingling and drawing up tightly against his body. He kissed desperately at the side of Evie’s face, the front of Cullen’s shoulder, every part of them he could reach. The physical pleasure couldn’t be put into words, but the connection he felt with them in that moment, the sheer trust and love that seemed to blossom, was what sent him over the edge. He roared as he came, his cock twitching and pouring into Evie, coating himself and Cullen with his hot essence.

Evie cried out the next moment as she felt the heat pool in her body, both of them thrusting feverishly into her, and her own orgasm took her. Her eyes rolled in her head as her body clamped down around them, trying to milk both men dry as her hips jerked between them. She was caught, unable to escape, and she nearly sobbed as wave after wave of ecstasy shook her to the core.

The feeling of the two of his loves coming against him was too much. Evie’s body truly became a vice then and he felt a white hot fluid curl around him as the elf came inside of her. His mouth opened wide against Evie in a silent scream as he came a few moments later, spilling into the already slick core that was Evelyn. It left him feeling weak, sated and connected to the two of them in a way that was beyond words. There was a feeling of peace as his body thrummed with pleasure and he thrust gently into her, against Solas as his cock was squeezed dry. “Oh… Maker,” he breathed out hotly against damp skin as he wilted against her back.

“Shit,” Evie breathed, her body shaking as she laid over Solas’s chest, Cullen’s weight a comfort on her back. She could barely breathe, could barely move. Hell, she could barely even form a coherent thought. A satisfied smile pulled at her lips as she laid the side of her face on Solas’s chest, listening to his racing heartbeat. She licked her lips, and smiled wider. “You lied to me again, Solas.”

Solas gave a jump, his mind suddenly frantically searching for something he had lied about. He’d told them everything, hadn’t he? He was certain he had. His stomach swooped painfully, his heart racing even more. “Vhenan, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said, exchanging a look with Cullen. “What do you mean I lied?”

“You  _ are  _ a god,” she answered, snickering as she turned her head to see his panicked expression. “A sex god.”

Relief crashed through him and his head fell back with a heavy sigh. “Don’t do that to me, vhenan!” he scolded, though a big grin split his face and he laughed the next moment. He gave her hip a playful swat and shook his head, staring up at the ceiling. “I never know what to think of you.” He drew a sharp breath through his nose and looked at Cullen. “Whatever shall we do with our dear Evelyn?”

“More of this,” Cullen said, muffled as his face was still pressed to Evelyn’s back, but he raised it the next moment to give Solas a silly grin, “Until none of us can form a coherent thought any more.” He chuckled and leaned forward, kissing the elf soundly. He murmured against his lips, “Though, I think I might be inclined to agree with her on this account.” He turned his head and pressed a long kiss to Evie’s cheek before he pulled back, slipping out of her body with a groan as he flopped back on the furs. “You both know how to wear me out.”

“You say that like you’re complaining,” Evie teased as she raised herself up, letting Solas slip from her body as well. “Ohh,” she groaned as she laid down between the two of them, collapsing into the warm pelts of fur. She turned and pressed a kiss to Cullen’s temple. “I think you got your wish,” she said, her voice sounding content and almost sleepy. “I won’t be able to walk tomorrow.” Another sigh escaped her and she closed her eyes, smiling softly as she realized that the hurt and the doubt was gone. Somehow they’d healed the hurt, made this feel warm and safe again. “I love you both,” she murmured.

A knot formed in Solas’s throat to hear her say it again and he rolled to his side, curling around her and pulling Cullen closer so he could hold him as well. “Ar lath ma,” he murmured softly as he held them protectively. He would never let this slip away from him again. He kissed the top of Evelyn’s head as he met Cullen’s gaze. “Definitely more of this.”


	34. Chapter 34

Evie limped up the stairs in the Rotunda, her face screwing up with each step, an occasional hiss escaping through her teeth. She couldn’t remember being this sore after a night of lovemaking. Though, to be fair, all three of them had been rather overly enthusiastic about it. She let out a heavy sigh as she reached the top of the stairs, and managed a smile when Dorian looked up from his book. “Hi,” she managed, swallowing as she tried to walk over to him without limping again. She didn’t quite manage it, and she bit her lips as she sat down in a chair next to him in his nook. 

Dorian raised his eyebrow at her hiss of pain, a slight smirk spreading across his face. “Something the matter, dear? You look rather worn out.” He could probably venture a guess as to what exactly her ailment was, but where was the fun in that? He marked his page and closed his book before he turned back to her expectantly. The loveliest blush had spread across her cheeks. He could remember feeling exactly the same after an extensive round of passion with the Iron Bull.

“Nothing,” she answered, feeling her face heat up, and she looked away from him, holding her hand to the side of her face as if to hide. Damn him. She dropped her hand and giggled. “You know me too well,” she accused, then sat back in the chair and draped her legs over his lap. “So I’m hopeless. Solas and I talked, and I realized that everything wasn’t his fault. He made mistakes, yes, but he never intentionally set out to hurt me. And he’s sorry. So… we made up.” Her face blushed even more. “Several times.”

Dorian shivered at the thought of what those two men could have done with her over the night. “Oh, you are a lucky woman, Inquisitor,” he chuckled and shook his head before he leaned back in his chair, “So, everything sorted out between you all then? Are you absolutely certain that I don’t need to crack any heads on this situation? God or not, I won’t have Solas mistreating my dearest friend.”

A smile spread across her lips, her heart warming to hear him so willing to defend her. “You don’t have to,” she said. “But if your heart’s really set on it, I won’t stop you,” she added with a snicker. “But really, everything’s good now. I should have let him explain better before, when he first tried to tell me about who he is. I think I could have saved myself and Cullen a lot of heartache. I feel bad for it now. It was all just a big clusterfuck. I’d do it different now if I could go back.” She pressed her lips thin and looked up at Dorian. “I don’t ever want to feel like that again.”

He reached across to her and patted her hand. “As long as you learned from it. It is in the past now, don’t dwell on it when the future is starting to brighten up.” He looked down at their hands and pulled back, reaching into his robes to pull out an amulet. “I’ve been meaning to tell you that I’ve decided to go back to Tevinter. Some things I need to do. You can thank Solas for putting it back into my head. Half of it, of course, was your inspiration. I’m going to go, see if I can’t knock the higher ups down a peg or two. Knowing now what I do about the elves. I’m going to see what I can do to free as many of the slaves in Tevinter as I can. It might get me killed, but I’ve always enjoyed martyrdom.” 

He passed over the necklace. “Here, a going away present. It’s a sending crystal. Quite rare, but you’d be amazed at what connections with the Inquisition can give you access to. If I get in over my head or if you are at a loss without my velvety voice… magic.” He smiled at her, studying her expression as she looked at the little thing.

“I wasn’t expecting this,” Evie admitted as she turned it over in her fingers, studying the crystal. Here she was expecting to have to break the news to him that she would be leaving Skyhold, and he’d beaten her to it. She managed to get the necklace over her head, then she looked over at him. “You always have to one-up me, don’t you?” she teased. “We’re leaving Skyhold, too. Once we’ve set everything in order first, of course. If you’re going to be working to free the slaves, you should talk to Solas. I think the two of you might really be able to accomplish something together.” She pressed her lips thin, worry for her best friend filling her chest. “And, you know, people might not be so willing to try to take your life if they find out the Dread Wolf is on your side.”

Dorian laughed at that, the rich sound filling the area. “I suppose they wouldn’t. They would think me too crazy to even bother with assassinating.” He tilted his head at her. “And just where are the three of you running off to? How will I be able to come find you when you need to get away from them for a little bit? And don’t pretend that you won’t, everyone does.” He smiled at her, reaching over to fix her hair that was caught under the chain. “I rather feel like running away myself. Bull has been rather… insistent since I told him the news.”

“There’s a home being built in the Crossroads,” she answered. “Solas says that we can come and go through the eluvians as we wish. Between the eluvians and these crystals, I think we’ll be fine.” She managed a sad sort of smile for him. “Bull’s going to miss you while you’re away.” She swallowed, knowing that she would miss having him so close as well. She let her feet drop to the floor and she moved to hug him as best as she could with one arm. “I’m going to miss you,” she murmured. “You won’t go until I do, right? That way neither of us are left alone here?”

Dorian chuckled and pulled her down onto his lap so he could hug her properly. He pulled his head back so he could look her in the eyes. “As if I would dare leave before you. I’m certainly not in any rush to get out of this place and back to my homeland. I rather enjoy not having assassins trying to lynch me at every turn. If your possessive paramours allow it, I’ll be certain to come and visit when I can. We will work something out, you have my word,” he promised, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to her cheek.

She smiled as she leaned into him. “How did I get so lucky to have you as my best friend?” she praised, keeping her arm around his shoulders. “Solas said we have about a month before we leave, so that should give us plenty of time,” she said, thinking over everything she wanted to do before she left Skyhold with Solas and Cullen. It had been a while since she and Sera had played any pranks on the other members of the inner circle. And she would have to pester Varric into more games of Wicked Grace, though she doubted she would have to twist his arm very much. She leaned her head against Dorian’s and grinned. “We’ll have to make sure to stir up as much trouble as possible before we go.”

Dorian chuckled and nodded. “Oh yes. I wholeheartedly agree. I will have to speak with Solas before the month is out then. Perhaps he would have some ideas he would like to suggest for me to do once I am in Tevinter again. And I am certain Varric will insist upon at least bi-yearly gatherings. I still have money on Cassandra and him hooking up before he heads back to Kirkwall.” 

“HA!” Evie laughed loudly, throwing her head back. It took her a moment to recover, and even then she was still giggling. “I’ll take that bet. You know Cassandra’s going to have your head if you so much as mention that in her presence again. That’s an even less likely pairing than me, Cullen, and Solas.” She grinned. “But you can keep antagonizing them all you like. You know how amusing it is.” She stretched in his lap, then winced as two very distinct points of pain flared. “I think I’m going to need to keep a supply of healing potions on hand,” she muttered.

Dorian chuckled, shaking his head. “Clearly you need more practice… making up.” He patted her leg. “Fear not, my friend, I shall brew you up a few health tonics before you leave. Perhaps even teach you the recipe if you feel so inclined. And shouldn’t that ancient elf of yours know some long lost ancient healing techniques? Shame on him,” he said, nodding his head, “Now. Come along. The best thing to fix that right up is a couple of terrible Ferelden beers down at the tavern.”

Evie groaned as she got to her feet, cursing under her breath about all the stairs she’d have to walk down to get to the tavern. “Oh, I’m sure he knows something. But he’s not sharing. I think he rather likes seeing us like this. Like he’s marked his territory,” she muttered. “And if you think I’m bad, you should see Cullen.” She snickered as she took Dorian’s hand and walked with him through Skyhold. A few drinks with her best friend sounded like just what she needed right now.

* * *

The next few weeks passed slowly for Solas as Evie and Cullen spent most of their waking time setting affairs in order. Not that it mattered, the home hadn’t been ready yet. But now it was, and he could barely believe that they were both here with him. They stood outside of the eluvian, carrying what little belongings they had with them. He’d assured them they wouldn’t need much. There had been a slightly tearful goodbye amongst their friends, though they all promised to keep in touch, and Solas knew it wasn’t just empty words that had been spoken. Dorian had threatened him if he didn’t allow the Tevinter to visit Evie often.

He passed his hand in front of the glass and the eluvian came to life, its surface turning a swirling blue. A nervousness seemed to fill his belly; he hoped they would be happy here. And though he hadn’t voiced it to them, part of him hoped that by dwelling in the crossroads, so close to the Fade, that perhaps their lives would be prolonged. It was selfish, perhaps, but Mythal had convinced him that a little selfishness now and again was not so bad a thing. 

“Come,” he said, and stepped through the mirror, almost shivering at the familiarity of it. He turned as Cullen and Evie stepped through, and he smiled. “There,” he said, pointing ahead towards the cabin sitting next to a lake. He watched their expressions carefully, taking in their reactions. “What do you think?”

Cullen blinked as he looked around, his breath taken away. This was nothing like the dreary, grey world that they had entered from the Temple of Mythal. This was a warm, cozy area that reminded him very much of the Hinterlands, echoing of his childhood home near Honnleath. The cabin was glowing with warmth and he suspected a fire was going inside of it. The wood smoke rising from the chimney confirmed his suspicions. He could feel the magic of the place tingling on his skin, yet he did not fear it. “Maker’s breath, Solas. It’s perfect,” he breathed as he looked around, a smile growing on his face as he turned to see his two loves. 

Evie nodded her agreement, feeling speechless. She’d never seen a place so inviting before. “Is this really for us?” she finally asked when she found her voice. After spending most of her life in the circle, and then the past year or so at Skyhold, this was, well, breathtaking. “I never dared to dream that I’d have my own home,” she said, feeling happy tears trying to brim in her eyes. 

“It’s yours, vhenan,” Solas said, stepping closer to her and wrapping his arm around her shoulders. Joy erupted in his chest. This was the reaction he’d hoped for. They both seemed more than happy with it. He was eager to show them inside. He took Evie’s bag and slipped it over his shoulder, then took her hand in his, and Cullen’s with the other. “I’m happy that you like it,” he said to both of them as they walked towards it. “Once we’ve had time to settle in, we will have to invite our friends. Make certain it’s up to Dorian’s standards. I would hate for him to have to, what was it he said again? I believe the word ‘maim’ was in there somewhere.”

Cullen laughed as he let his fingers curl around Solas’s. “It was quite the rant he gave you, wasn’t it? I’m a little surprised at how protective he’s gotten of Evelyn. Almost as protective as a mabari, but don’t tell him I said that.” He let his eyes rake over the cabin as they stepped up onto the porch. The place was secluded, but there seemed to be a song in the air, like birds almost. He wasn’t certain save for the fact that it seemed to soothe him. He noticed a stump out front by the stairs with an axe imbedded in it for chopping wood. “You really thought of everything, didn’t you? Just exactly how long have you been planning this out?” He looked at the elf suspiciously.

Solas felt a heat spread across his nose all the way to the tips of his ears. “A while,” he commented vaguely, not meeting Cullen’s eyes as he opened the door to the cabin. A warmth seemed to draw them in, the scent of the fresh lumber mixed with the fire burning in the fireplace. It was simple, but more than comfortable, and exactly what they needed. He turned suddenly and scooped Evie into his arms, carrying her over the threshold.

Evie gave a cry of surprise, then giggled at him. “Look at you being all romantic,” she teased, inclining her head to nibble at the point of his ear. It was a little cliche, but it made her heart flutter all the more. “I’ll have to remember to tell Cass,” she snickered, then leaned her head on his shoulder as she looked around. A home. Her home. With them. “Maker, it really is perfect.”

Cullen stepped inside, closing the door behind him. He instantly fell in love with the open space in front of the fireplace. He could see the kitchen area off to the side of the fire and an area for dining together. There was a room in back he suspected lead to the bedroom. He chuckled when he looked at the fireplace again, furs reminiscent of Evie’s room back at Skyhold were lain down in front of it. “I think I could get used to this place.” He rubbed at Solas’s back, smiling at him and leaning over to kiss his cheek, “You did good, love.”

It wasn’t enough and Solas leaned in quickly to capture Cullen’s lips, kissing him passionately. He didn’t want to admit how nervous he was about showing them this place for the first time. He finally pulled back, his lips hot from the kiss, and gently set Evie on her feet. He took Cullen’s bag and set it aside with Evie’s before he turned to them again. “Can you feel it? The magic in this place. Stronger than any outside of the Crossroads. It will keep you safe, even if I am away. You needn’t worry about anyone harming you here. Not even the demons in your dreams.”

Cullen closed his eyes, feeling the aire of the home wrap around him, reminding him of the times that Solas, in his wolf form, had curled up around him in the Fade while he slept. He made a warm feeling bubble up in his chest and he reached out, drawing the other man in for a hot kiss before he smiled at Evie and drew her into their embrace, kissing her as well. “It feels like I belong here.” A lump gathered in his throat at the thought that he would be able to rest here. Truly feel safe for once in his life.

Evie knew how much that had to mean to Cullen, to be able to sleep without the worry of nightmares. It seemed there wasn’t a single thing Solas didn’t think of. She leaned into both of them, unable to stop smiling. “I don’t think there’s a single thing here for Dorian to disapprove of,” she teased, kissing at Solas’s jaw as he chuckled. “This is amazing. Truly.” She pulled back so she could look around at the details of the home, drinking it all in. She’d never felt so at home in a new place. She’d never felt so at home anywhere. “This is the perfect place to spend the rest of our lives.”


End file.
